1st time DMT, 2 vapor hits, pure terror... help!

[bigbenny]

Smoked DMT for the first time today. It's been a long awaited experience. What drew me to this molecule was all the research I had done on it... Rogan, Strassman, Mckenna, and the whole DMT community that describes the experience as beautiful beyond comprehension. I wanted to go too. I wanted to see these vivid kaleidoscopes, machine elves, distant planets and cities of color. I wanted to experience this mysterious feeling of collective oneness within this strange dimension. That's what I was expecting, but it is not what I got.

Halfway through second hit and I knew something was wrong. I was able to stay in tune with reality long enough to set the vaporizer down next to me on the couch. The only way to describe what I felt is... I was sure I was going to die. I could feel my body shutting down like a poison consuming me entirely. All physical strength was diminished. Immediately I wanted out. I wanted to escape this nightmare. And just as soon as I had that thought, I was instantly reminded that I could not. I was stuck here and it would have it's way with me. These two thoughts constantly repeated over and over the whole time.... "I want out. I'm not getting out." It was extremely exhausting and painful, physically and mentally. Every second was unbearable. I could sense how much time was going by. I was still here in my living room, but barely coherent. I kept thinking there's no way I can handle 20 minutes of this. I was begging for it to end. BEGGING! Please please please stop! Thankfully OMG, after about 3 minutes, I could sense it waring off.

There was a moment when I realized that I was seeing some very synchronized colorful patterns, but I couldnt focus enough. It was very blury.

When I realized it was waring off, I opened my eyes. Everything I could see had a pulse like other dimensional shadows that you cant see sober.

Has this ever happened to anyone else?

 

[joedirt]

Next time take the part about working your way up in dosage seriously.

You said two hits, but how much spice was that? I'd start with 5-10mg and work up in 2-5mg increments.

But to answer your question. Yes we have all had bad experiences. Learn to shift into witness mode and stay there.

If you can do that and not panic it will almost alway's turn out awesome.

 

[Purges]

Yeah sure. DMT isn't all elves and oneness - there is a WHOLE lot more to it, including such things as feeling like you are dying from time to time. The only thing that is dying is your ego for a shoort time, and even then it's not really dying. It can be rough though. You've just got to try and make sure that your set and setting are as good as possible, and go with the flow. Struggling and fighting an experience will make you end up in a confusing loop that won't make things any better. One must stay 8)

I wish you better luck on future journeys should you chose to continue :d

 

[InLaKesh]

Confronting the fear of "letting go" is a strong part of the DMT experience (and lessons).

 

[red_lego_spaceman]

If you don't already have one, I'd recommend getting a milligram scale. It's nice to know exactly how much you're getting.

I'm also a big fan of small doses. I started with maybe 10-15mg and just did that repeatedly to overcome my anxiety. Then I went up to 20.. then 25.. then 30.. now I'm in the 40 range. This over the course of maybe 40 trips. I've only broken through once, but every one of my experiences has been positive.

Part of the reason I'm working into it slowly is, my friend has an aya ceremony planned for a bunch of us in August and the thought of being in that world for hours and hours still freaks me out. I want to pop in a bunch of times and make some friends there before I spend the night

 

[bigbenny]

Next time take the part about working your way up in dosage seriously.

You said two hits, but how much spice was that? I'd start with 5-10mg and work up in 2-5mg increments.

Hey thanks for all the responses. good stuff. I'm definitely not giving up. I'm too much of a believer. A little confused about dosage though. There's a lot of advice about that on here. Is there a difference in a single toke between 2 dosages? Isnt a hit a hit?

Also... I need to know what the definition of BREAK THRU is. Is this like when all of your humanity explodes and you experience the trip in full reality or something? Some people on here have had some wicked trips but say they didnt break through. what am i missing? Is it even possible to truly break through and what does that look like?

 

[easyrider]

A breakthrough is subjective, and that's why most breakthroughs of people vary significantly. "A sudden, dramatic, and important discovery or development." Run with that general definition, and you'll know when you've experienced one.

 

[spiritual7pioneer]

I've had the same trouble.
My first breakthrough I began fighting it,
and its like tugging against a slip knot pretty much.
Just ly back and cherish the ride:]

 

[Purges]

Next time take the part about working your way up in dosage seriously.

You said two hits, but how much spice was that? I'd start with 5-10mg and work up in 2-5mg increments.

Hey thanks for all the responses. good stuff. I'm definitely not giving up. I'm too much of a believer. A little confused about dosage though. There's a lot of advice about that on here. Is there a difference in a single toke between 2 dosages? Isnt a hit a hit?

Also... I need to know what the definition of BREAK THRU is. Is this like when all of your humanity explodes and you experience the trip in full reality or something? Some people on here have had some wicked trips but say they didnt break through. what am i missing? Is it even possible to truly break through and what does that look like?

A hit can vary greatly from person to person - as a seasoned pot smoker, i could clear a very large dose (more than I am comfortable taking) in one hit. Other people would need 3 hits to clear a standard sized dose. Also there is a marked difference in intensity between taking the dose in one hit, and taking it in a few hits IME.

Break throughs are subjective, but you will know when it happens. I like easyrider's definition, it leaves some flexibility How ever it can be the single most intense thing you have ever experienced, so buckle up!

 

[5th Dimensional]

Too much man, start small...

 

[Felnik]

Forget this breakthrough thing
It's different for everyone .

Forget about others experiences , words do not covey the actuality of it.
No matter what .
It's not always an enlightening
Experience .

No expectations, go easy with it
How many times have I written this on here .

Going easy means having some kind of neutral base herb to start with . Mullein works well .
Work up gradually .
Start by using micro amounts of the stuff

 

[tele]

Going easy means having some kind of neutral base herb to start with . Mullein works well .
Work up gradually .
Start by using micro amounts of the stuff

I think going easy means starting low... What do you mean by going easy with neutral herb?

 

[Electric Kool-Aid]

Felnik - just have a question. You launch in the forest lots. Do you recommend this? Any tips? Plus is this a park walk or a full woods forsets with no one around? Anything you have to watch out for? Thanks eh!

 

[Felnik]

I mean using a a base herb that doesn't have any psychedelic effects.
some people use weed or various things that make it hard to focus on the spice and can cause things to get out of hand.
Or changa blends that really make things tricky.

I'm speaking specifically about first starting out into this,

I like mullein because its simple clean, good for the lungs and easy to get . Its something that can be found growing all over the place as well so you can collect it yourself.


I think a vaporgenie some clean spice and mullein is the best way to start.
starting very slow with measured doses .

My personal preference is to go into nature away from people and distraction.
I think spice and a beautiful natural setting go great together.

 

[the middle man]

fear of the unknown can be intense in such an alien reality.
'I will face my fear, I will permit it to pass over me and through me. When it is gone only I will remain.'

A subject smoked cannabis with DMT and also smoked cannabis on LSD. It wasn't the best way to feel comfortable as cannabis lowered anger and increased compassion while increasing guilt and anxiety in this subjects experience. It was an emotional trade off. TO avoid the anxiety it would been better to have inhaled dmt with a non psychoactive substance. Taking dmt with valium or positive stimulants like mdma could work well as long as there are no combination effects created. Generally emotions have the strongest effect on a mind-altering experience and our imaginations flow from these basic primal instincts. The greater emotional control and endurance for intense emotions the more easily you will be able to handle a dmt experience. However there are levels beyond levels until infinity. Every experience is relative in space and time. Your first breakthrough may have been a walk in the park compared to the next breakthrough. As before emotion is a vital element in shaping the experience and imagination can give that emotion infinite forms. Self-reflection becomes a powerful tool in the experience of emotion. The ability to step back from a set of polarities or 'opposites' and see the greater spectrum or 'whole'of which they are both a part of. The ability to step back from the divisions inside ourselves to see a greater whole of which we are all a part. The ability to be detached from our emotions in self-reflection. Of course we most definitely need the ability to feel our emotions as they define us but emotions test our will in this process of definition and there is always a deeper more subtle emotion that lies beneath these testing, immature surface emotions so detachment from these surface emotions can allow us to feel these deeper yet more subtle emotions. The heart of the tree.
This is highly subjective theory based upon a phenomenon I continue to encounter known as foundational or trunk knowledge, this is the knowledge inside all things, the knowledge of each individual thing is what I call branch knowledge. Trunk or general logic and branch or specific logic. All branch knowledge can extrapolated from trunk knowledge. Trunk knowledge is what derails the topic in threads because it relates to all topics, it is the underlying structure of all things.

 

[Eliyahu]

bigbenny,

I too have "begged" for it to stop...because when I get a good dose of DMT it almost always brings me to what I could only describe as being a simulated near death experience...
The only thing is that "the experience" it is so well simulated that the only way to differentiate between a DMT death and a real death is by using pure rationale and basically reminding yourself that "this is not the big one".

Generally when I start to freak out the entities will attempt to calm me down by joking with me or poking some fun at me to lighten the mood....

Once when I was reeling in fear because I thought I was dying and a voice very calmly and matter of factly stated ..."Your not dying....this is just like dreaming, there is no difference really. Are you scared to dream?"

Another thing....If you have no history of spiritual psychedelic use then the "elves" and all that other fun stuff may not be available to your perception right away....Your awareness has to be sort of attenuated in order to see these things...Sort of like a TV antenna that needs adjustment in order to clearly pick up a signal...

It may take a few sessions for the DMT to improve you cognitive functioning but if you are calm and patient this hidden mystical realm you seek may yet reveal itself for you....

 

[thEorEtical]

My thoughts. Firstly, do not go into a trip with expectations or wants... It's better to clear your head and be ready for anything, because thatd what u could get, anything. Secondly, the "poisonous" feeling and loss of strength and control is natural, you don't need to fight it or it will unwillingly take you, u have to let go of your body, embrace these feelings, don't let it terrify you, just let go, let it happen. Lastly, you said you had the urge to escape, you wanted it to be over... If you want to escape, your going to become afraid, because you can not escape, it is impossible... You have to come to terms with these things that you're shown, you just watch, ponder, accept, and try to learn something about yourself, imo. If you feel you cannot do these things I have described, then its quite possible that your not "ready" yet and you should wait until you feel like you can observe and accept anything that is thrown at you. If you decide you are not ready, don't fret, DMT has a way of finding you when you are ready... It's mindblowing how it found me at the perfect time, remarkable, but thats besides the point. I hope my advice is helpful to you in some way or another, good luck =] Peace and Love.

 

[autumnsphere]

Confronting the fear of "letting go" is a strong part of the DMT experience (and lessons).

The most important part imho.

 

[autumnsphere]

Once when I was reeling in fear because I thought I was dying and a voice very calmly and matter of factly stated ..."Your not dying....this is just like dreaming, there is no difference really. Are you scared to dream?"

This is so beautiful and philosophical. Heraclitus used to say that dreams are death.

 

[thEorEtical]

Felnik - just have a question. You launch in the forest lots. Do you recommend this? Any tips? Plus is this a park walk or a full woods forsets with no one around? Anything you have to watch out for? Thanks eh!

I would definitely recommend this, whether it be a full fledged forest or anywhere in nature. Being in a "natural environment" on a sunny, warm day, is so calming to me, and the open eye visuals when in this setting can be so phenomenal. Words cannot begin to describe how much I love this. Read my post in this section called "Breathtaking". It is a detailed report of my first DMT trip in 5 years, and first one ever if u knew the story, didn't have much success with it when younger. Since then I have also indulged inside of my home and the home of a friend, so my opinion isn't biased. It can be equally as nice anywhere presumably, but there's just something about a natural scenery that is so commanding, yet tranquil... Powerful, yet serene. Try it and get back to me. Just make sure that youre not somewhere that is highly populated with bears, doesn't sound like something id want toying with my body while I'm "traveling".


Peace and Love.