NikkiPotnick1981
Rising Star
I dont have a ton of experience with psychedelics. nnDMT about 8 times. 4-ACO-DMT 4 times and 1P-LSD once. I started with nnDMT because I was drawn to it after I "woke up" to my disfunction I'd been living in all these years. (I was an angry conservative asshole who thought he knew everything. :thumb_dow )
It was really difficult for me to navigate the DMT space. Low doses were quite beautiful and the COV's were incredible but when I tried to push the envelope for breakthrough doses, I freaked out. Fear of losing control. So I was urged by this board and others to navigate the space with LSD and Mushrooms first.
I even struggled with these softer psychs for a while but I think I'm really starting to hit my stride and feel comfortable in these states.
A couple nights ago, with intent, I dosed 25mg of 4ACO (which was my largest 4ACO dose to date) and decided I'd lay in bed alone to experience my trip on a deeper level and really try to get inside my own mind. Usually I'd dose outside in a natural setting with external stimuli to keep me out of negative thought loops. This time I wanted to try to really explore my mind with no external factors. Only with mindfulness and meditation.
So once the come up was upon me, I grabbed my headphones went to lay in bed. I was a bit sketched out at first due to the intensity of the music, the darkness and the come up anxiety. But eventually I settled in to a beautiful trip. It was surprisingly very easy to navigate.
What was most amazing was the dimension I eventually visited. I wouldnt call it a breakthrough. As I was still in my body for the most part. However I was not me. I had transcended my ego. I could quite clearly see the disfunction that we as a human species live with. All he negativity we live with. I also realized that humans are amazing. The way we had evolved and the difference between us and animals. We were truly a gifted species even with the disfunction.
As I went deeper, I slipped into a plane where no fear, anxiety, greed, lust or any other negative emotion existed. At that moment I was at peace. It was a beautiful space. This place was somewhere humans cant stay, not whilst we have our ego. I had a jaw dropping recognition that I was everything and everything was me. I wasn't some guy walking around earth. I understood I was so much more. I understood that the egoic part of me isnt me. Its a tool to help me navigate my life on earth. Nothing more. Each time I left that amazing plane, I reflected. I absolutely finally understood consciousness. Something I had been trying to understand for many months. I never REALLY grasped it from reading about it... but at that moment in my trip, I knew exactly what it was. I couldn't even tell you guys what it is now, but in the moment I had an innate intelligence on the matter. Thats gone now tho
.
Another thing I experience was the lack of fear. There was absolutely none! Fear doesn't exist on that plane. I was just existing as a tree would exist. Trees dont have fear. They just are what they are. They are life. I was life and nothing more or less. I realized that a "bad trip" in this space was impossible. I could be set on fire and not fight it. I could be devoured by a lion and not fight it. I was absolutely ready to die. I think I was dead! Atleast the human me was.
It was quite easy to pop in and out of this space. As I put head phones on and meditated, I'd easily slip into that state, when I began to think about my experience, I was brought back to earth. With focus I would fall back in, then when my girl friend walked into the room I was brought back out. I was a yo yo popping in and out of this beautiful place. Funny enough, I cant evaluate this space in the moment. I can only reflect after. Many times the amazement of what I was experiencing brought me out of the space. I am not a very skilled meditator. But my goodness, does this substance make it easier.
This is the first time I hit this zone where I was absolutely at peace. The visuals that would manifest were fun, but they were so unimpressive compared to the realm I would go to. Its as if the visuals were a human experience that our senses can understand. Yet the plane I visited was not something my senses could comprehend. It was just a state of mind that was more beautiful and loving than anything I've ever experienced.
The most amazing and beautiful moment was the fact that, although the human me could die at any moment, I was absolutely safe. Our body is fragile and has a shelf life. But the essence of me cant be lost. It cant die. I realized I am so well taken care of. The essence of me is so safe and loved. Its so liberating and amazing to know this. It's amazing to know that when I die, I awake as something so much more than this.
I wonder what higher dose trips will show me. I felt so lucky and grateful that I experienced this beautiful place.
It was really difficult for me to navigate the DMT space. Low doses were quite beautiful and the COV's were incredible but when I tried to push the envelope for breakthrough doses, I freaked out. Fear of losing control. So I was urged by this board and others to navigate the space with LSD and Mushrooms first.
I even struggled with these softer psychs for a while but I think I'm really starting to hit my stride and feel comfortable in these states.
A couple nights ago, with intent, I dosed 25mg of 4ACO (which was my largest 4ACO dose to date) and decided I'd lay in bed alone to experience my trip on a deeper level and really try to get inside my own mind. Usually I'd dose outside in a natural setting with external stimuli to keep me out of negative thought loops. This time I wanted to try to really explore my mind with no external factors. Only with mindfulness and meditation.
So once the come up was upon me, I grabbed my headphones went to lay in bed. I was a bit sketched out at first due to the intensity of the music, the darkness and the come up anxiety. But eventually I settled in to a beautiful trip. It was surprisingly very easy to navigate.
What was most amazing was the dimension I eventually visited. I wouldnt call it a breakthrough. As I was still in my body for the most part. However I was not me. I had transcended my ego. I could quite clearly see the disfunction that we as a human species live with. All he negativity we live with. I also realized that humans are amazing. The way we had evolved and the difference between us and animals. We were truly a gifted species even with the disfunction.
As I went deeper, I slipped into a plane where no fear, anxiety, greed, lust or any other negative emotion existed. At that moment I was at peace. It was a beautiful space. This place was somewhere humans cant stay, not whilst we have our ego. I had a jaw dropping recognition that I was everything and everything was me. I wasn't some guy walking around earth. I understood I was so much more. I understood that the egoic part of me isnt me. Its a tool to help me navigate my life on earth. Nothing more. Each time I left that amazing plane, I reflected. I absolutely finally understood consciousness. Something I had been trying to understand for many months. I never REALLY grasped it from reading about it... but at that moment in my trip, I knew exactly what it was. I couldn't even tell you guys what it is now, but in the moment I had an innate intelligence on the matter. Thats gone now tho
. Another thing I experience was the lack of fear. There was absolutely none! Fear doesn't exist on that plane. I was just existing as a tree would exist. Trees dont have fear. They just are what they are. They are life. I was life and nothing more or less. I realized that a "bad trip" in this space was impossible. I could be set on fire and not fight it. I could be devoured by a lion and not fight it. I was absolutely ready to die. I think I was dead! Atleast the human me was.
It was quite easy to pop in and out of this space. As I put head phones on and meditated, I'd easily slip into that state, when I began to think about my experience, I was brought back to earth. With focus I would fall back in, then when my girl friend walked into the room I was brought back out. I was a yo yo popping in and out of this beautiful place. Funny enough, I cant evaluate this space in the moment. I can only reflect after. Many times the amazement of what I was experiencing brought me out of the space. I am not a very skilled meditator. But my goodness, does this substance make it easier.
This is the first time I hit this zone where I was absolutely at peace. The visuals that would manifest were fun, but they were so unimpressive compared to the realm I would go to. Its as if the visuals were a human experience that our senses can understand. Yet the plane I visited was not something my senses could comprehend. It was just a state of mind that was more beautiful and loving than anything I've ever experienced.
The most amazing and beautiful moment was the fact that, although the human me could die at any moment, I was absolutely safe. Our body is fragile and has a shelf life. But the essence of me cant be lost. It cant die. I realized I am so well taken care of. The essence of me is so safe and loved. Its so liberating and amazing to know this. It's amazing to know that when I die, I awake as something so much more than this.
I wonder what higher dose trips will show me. I felt so lucky and grateful that I experienced this beautiful place.