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Bunch of Good and Bad trip reports -- only read if really bored

Migrated topic.

Lemonade

Rising Star
A mix of good and a scary trips

Disclaimer:
***Really long and ramblely with no redeeming qualities or insights. Please read only if incredibly bored.

TL:DR: Oral Harmalas + Vaped Freebase is very effective and really helps with pre-flight anxiety. Be warned though, easy to overdo the freebase, when feeling so relaxed from the harmalas.

Also, be good to your friends and family and don't encourage them/let them overdo it like I did. :(

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A couple of weeks ago, my cousin, our buddy and I had a spice night. It started off incredibly blissful and fun, but ended up unfortunately on a really bad note.

My cousin and I predosed with 125mg of harmalas freebase, taken orally in a shot glass full of juice. Our buddy is on SSRIs and wisely agreed to skip on the harmalas.

I measured out the doses for everyone throughout the night and was affectionately renamed Madame Haggard…apparently my eyes took on a “wild” look by the middle of the evening and they also kept referring to my scales as “my cauldron.”
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All 3 of us, approach DMT very differently. To me, it is usually intensely spiritual. To my buddy, it is just a fun curiosity (though he did begin to say a few times that he thought the room was alive) and to my cousin, it is a wondrous, roller coaster ride.
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Now my buddy who is on SSRIs, unfortunately doesn’t seem to have really strong Spice trips. I believe this is for 2 reasons, neither of which can be helped imho.

One, likely the SSRIs are reducing the effectiveness of the Spice and secondly, he is never able to take the “3rd hit” right away. He usually takes 2 big hits, says “I’m good” and then quickly hands me the pipe while leaving a significant amount of residue remaining. My buddy occasionally suffers from panic attacks and has moderately high blood pressure, so although I can’t stop him from doing it, I don’t want him to go past his comfort level.

Anyways, I usually load up 30mg for my buddy (anything lower than that and he thinks I’m being mean --- which is not true, I don’t want him to have a panic attack!) and by the end of the night, at his insistence, we moved him up to 40mg. These doses gave him moderately strong OEV, where he spoke of how the room around him appeared to be beautifully textured and layered. He usually keeps his eyes open and stares at the walls or sometimes the ground. (All the while clutching his asthma inhaler --- which is kind of a disturbing image! I really wish he wouldn’t smoke spice at all, but I can’t talk him out of it and my cousin keeps encouraging him)
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Now, my cousin is a trip in itself to watch! Because we predosed with harmalas, I thought we could start a little bit lower (he normally like 35 – 40mg of freebase n.n. dmt) and I started him at 18mg. About 2 minutes later, he took another hit of 10mg and embarked on the “best trip of his life.” (So he had a total of 28mg)

My cousin keeps his eyes wide open during his trips (so not to miss a thing lol) and always has a big goofy grin on his face. He often will move his head back and forth, making little noises and squeals of delight. His trip lasted about 10 minutes and then he had an afterglow for the next 30 – 40 minutes. He was very happy.
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I did the same dose as my cousin. I took about an 18mg dose of freebase spice and about 5 minutes or so later, reached for the other 10mg. I had an amazing trip. Definitely not a breakthrough (but I didn’t want that) --- and this dose gave me incredible closed eye visuals.

Ever since I had a really intense LSD trip in the summertime, most of my CEVs involve beautiful interlocking spirals (though I do experience geometric shapes and occasionally see the DMT face that is depicted in a lot of DMT inspired artwork) I usually lose myself in these CEVs for a few minutes. It feels like they are moving through me --- and beyond what I should be able to see. I definitely feel like I am experiencing a higher dimension.

This will likely sounds nuts, I know, but for me, it’s always going to be a really good trip, when I hear this beautiful female voice, guiding me. I don’t know if it’s my inner voice/a Guardian Angel/my higher self --- I’m not really sure, but I do secretly believe that she is a divine spirit and I love and appreciate her.

Right at the beginning of the trip, after I finish my last exhale and begin to panic, I hear her tell me that it’s time to “enjoy…” and then I relax and actually do begin to enjoy it. Throughout the trip, she often tells me to “hush” (whenever my mind attempts to figure out the unexplainable things I’m seeing or when my mind starts worrying or feeling guilty about something) As well, she always reminds me to “breathe” throughout the trip.

Also, as this was the first time I’d ever predosed harmalas…what I didn’t anticipate (though had read about) and was so amazed to experience, was this 40 seconds of absolute bliss during the come up. I’m usually not aware of any “come up” on DMT --- all of a sudden, I am there, like it or not. And although, I’ve had a long honeymoon phase with the spice, my pre-flight anxiety has only gotten stronger.

So I was shocked when for about 30 - 40 seconds nothing happened…except that I felt incredibly calm (euphoric)….and then although the CEVs started to come on rapidly, it wasn’t overwhelming. This delay and softening of the experience, really helped me overcome the intense fear that I get at the beginning. And like my cousin, I also went on to have one of the best trips of my life.


So after an hour and a half or so, my buddy had decided to have another trip (about 40mg this time). He definitely took 2 huge hits and my cousin finished off the residue left in the pipe. My buddy seemed to have a really enjoyable trip, and the visuals lasted 2 -3 minutes.

My cousin then took a 18mg dose, but said that he didn’t think he gotten anything, so he took the other 15mg dose I’d prepared for him.

This time, my cousin was very chatty and goofy and we were all laughing and having a great time. While this was happening, I had taken apart the electronic pipe that my cousin didn’t get anything off of to see what had happened. (These electronic pipes can be hit or miss, and if one inhales too quickly before the crystals have melted, it is easy to get crystals in the filter – which is what had happened)

After a few minutes (maybe 4-5?) my cousin asked if he could have another, so I handed him my electronic pipe that I’d preloaded with about 18mg. (What was to be my dose) Unfortunately, I’d forgotten that I’d taken the filter off my pipe all together and when my cousin inhaled to quickly, he ended up getting a mouthful of dmt crystals. :(

Needless to say, he wasn’t happy and was frustrated that he didn’t get any vapor/smoke off of that hit either, so after a moment, I gave him my other pipe, full of 10 – 15 mg.

This was a big mistake and one that I feel very ashamed about. (Because he was talking very incoherently, asking questions like “where is here? Is this real? Should I have another?” --- So I should have easily realized that he’d had more than enough. All 3 of us are Marijuana enthusiasts with our motto always being… if you are able to ask if you want another…you should of course, have another! (I will never be so irresponsible with DMT dosing again!)

Well, he definitely got that last 10 mg, in addition to the 15mg earlier, plus the residue from our buddy’s pipe. And I think it’s very likely that the 18mg of crystals he had accidentally ingested had become sublingually active. (Because of the MAOI drink we took earlier)

I’d estimate he potentially could have had anywhere from between 43 – 65 mg in total over the course of 5 – 10 minutes. (With a MAOI drink and 28mg of smoked DMT a couple of hours earlier)

After this last hit, he immediately bolted straight up (he was lying on a reclining sofa bed) and ran into his bedroom.

By the time I caught up with him, he was sitting on the edge of his bed repeating over and over to ??? “thank-you for letting me live.” (It was really upsetting to see him so scared) He then ran into the bathroom and began to throw up.

Now because I’m a girl, he wouldn’t let me into the bathroom with him, but our buddy went in and stayed with him for about 10 minutes. His little kitten came into the bathroom with him and afterwards, he said that the little kitten looked like he was 10 feet tall.

After 10 minutes, my cousin came back to the living room still not in his right mind. He started yelling that DMT was poison and actually tried to get me to throw it out. It took about an hour, but I finally was able to make a deal with him that no one would smoke anymore that night (I definitely was not in the mood anyway) and in the morning, if he still felt that way, we would discuss throwing it out.

The next day, he agreed not to pressure me into throwing it out (That just wasn’t going to happen anyway) but he was still convinced that DMT was poison. And a couple of days later, he explained what he’d experienced. (At first he wouldn’t discuss it at all and just kept saying that he almost died)

He said that prior to taking the last hit, his tongue had begun to feel “really weird” and that after he took that last 10mg, he felt his consciousness suddenly being sucked up into a little ball and disappearing. My cousin said he truly believed that he was dying.

I felt terrible, because I obviously gave him way more DMT than he could handle (I couldn’t handle a dose past 50mg either) and the reason I always waited for my buddy and cousin to have their trips was so I could make sure this kind of thing didn’t happen.

I think this was likely my cousin’s first real “breakthrough” and rather than “letting go” my cousin fought it with all his might --- literally to the point of jumping up and running away.

I had definitely educated my cousin on what breakthrough doses were like, warned him that as wondrous as DMT is, it can be equally as terrifying, and had forced him to read descriptions of what to expect on DMT a few months ago.

But while this guides are very helpful, as I’m sure as everyone here knows, there’s no way to truly be prepared for a DMT breakthrough or ego death. I’ve read reports of very brave (imho) psychonauts who are able to “accept death” and then move on to experience an incredible trip…but, sometimes it’s impossible to do that. Especially if you forget that you’re on a drug or what’s happening.

When I first started DMT back in the summertime, I had a bunch of really intense breakthroughs…most were incredibly blissful, but I think they were so strong, that my consciousness was too far gone to even know what ego death was.

Save for one, when I did experience the most terrifying trip of my life. During this bad trip, I had no idea why I was in this horrifying place but just that it was my fault. (The walls were pure white and crashing and melting all around me, leaving nothing behind but this black void)

I didn’t have any conception of who I was or that I’d taken a drug and it felt like I was in this void for an eternity. As I came down, the words “DMT” floated past my eyes like in a cartoon and I started to remember who I was. This trip went on for far too long (no idea how much in real time --- probably 10 – 15 minutes, but maybe more) and I became convinced that I would have be put in an institution for the rest of my life. I remember reaching down to pet the cat that I was watching (who was seemed really concerned for me --- I think I may have been screaming) and was shocked to find that the cat had 3 adorable heads, each with humongous eyes.

So I do understand the terror my cousin felt. But just like me, here we are, exactly 1 week after he thought he had almost died, and he’s called to see if we can do it again tonight.

Thanks for reading!

I have a feeling people might be shaking their heads thinking these (my cousin, buddy and I) are a perfect description of people who shouldn’t be doing DMT.

And I agree, I think we are all nuts, but tonight it seems, we’re doing it again.

Have a great night/day! :)
 
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