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Can you really remember..?

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remembering these journeys is kind of laughable really. i think even for those of us who can bring a tiny slice back and pathetically attempt to fit it into the framework of a crude language, it is really such a infintessimally small snippet of the actual experience...

we speak in metaphors, those of us who can remember and get it into "words"....we speak in a sort of prose that is the only real way one can even attempt to describe the indescribable. i broke through DEEP yesterday....FIVE TIMES BACK TO BACK....all i can offer to this wonderful community is a one-page outline of ridiculously inadequate translation....all day long today i can see events from yesterday's journeys as clear as the world around me and yet i STILL have no means to make it manifest here.

it is the most maddening and challenging part of the work for me.

i have pondered taking computer animation courses just to try and create some sort of visual idea of where i go and what i see....but when i think about it realistically it is such a dauntingly impossible task. it is deep within my nature to WANT TO SHARE THIS!!! to not be able to is truly heartbreaking...

that doesn't mean i'm gonna stop trying though... ;) like i've said many times, this is IMPORTANT work. it just feels that way in my heart. this isn't recreational, escapist or "thrill seeking". this is work and i take it very seriously. to have visions SO CLEAR. not just "shit melting" or "colors and trails and shit..."....but real, honest, straight-up visions and journeys with things that i'm not consciously "thinking up" in that moment....things that originate from beyond the control of my ego....how is this not the most important thing i can pour myself into???

i remember my journeys almost with photographic clarity. unfortunately, a photograph of everything is as confusing as seeing it live.... taping myself while i go (i have been slowly finding myself able to speak even when super deep...not when ego-dead (duh) but up until that point) and coming back and listening to what i have channeled has been jaw-dropping almost every time. even my voice is different sounding! :shock:

it is the memory of the right-brain that records hyperspace experiences. this memory never fades. these experiences are with you always, never fret or worry that they're somehow "slipping away". each journey flips new switches within you that will never be un-flipped.

retreaving these memories is not a matter of "doing" something....but rather the fruit of learning how to "not do" anything. meditation has almost gotten to the point of taking me back there on more than one occassion. the more the left-brain's strangle hold can be relaxed, the more the eternal right-brain can share it's wisdom... RIGHT??...right...... ;)

LOVE AND GRATITUDE!!
 
I'm sitting here drinking a beer and can remember so much detail from hyperspace. It makes me want to clap my hands and smile. So I tap tap tap this out for you to read. It's a soulular dance in an omnimirror.
Not an hour passes where ajna doesn't trail off into another dimension. The way it folds. How this world tunes out and spins to the cymatic atmosphere of dark matter.
I am quiet, and listening to the memories spark underskull mycelium.
Even when I'm ordering at a restaurant, there they are.
"She's playing footsie in another dimension"

Deep behind your cornea, I remember our fractal invisibility.
I remember how you really look,
and I will never, ever forget.




Indeed, hyperspace is currently beyond our capacity to describe, but the memories are there and can be accessed via focus.
 
antrocles said:
remembering these journeys is kind of laughable really. i think even for those of us who can bring a tiny slice back and pathetically attempt to fit it into the framework of a crude language, it is really such a infintessimally small snippet of the actual experience...

we speak in metaphors, those of us who can remember and get it into "words"....we speak in a sort of prose that is the only real way one can even attempt to describe the indescribable. i broke through DEEP yesterday....FIVE TIMES BACK TO BACK....all i can offer to this wonderful community is a one-page outline of ridiculously inadequate translation....all day long today i can see events from yesterday's journeys as clear as the world around me and yet i STILL have no means to make it manifest here.

it is the most maddening and challenging part of the work for me.

i have pondered taking computer animation courses just to try and create some sort of visual idea of where i go and what i see....but when i think about it realistically it is such a dauntingly impossible task. it is deep within my nature to WANT TO SHARE THIS!!! to not be able to is truly heartbreaking...

that doesn't mean i'm gonna stop trying though... ;) like i've said many times, this is IMPORTANT work. it just feels that way in my heart. this isn't recreational, escapist or "thrill seeking". this is work and i take it very seriously. to have visions SO CLEAR. not just "shit melting" or "colors and trails and shit..."....but real, honest, straight-up visions and journeys with things that i'm not consciously "thinking up" in that moment....things that originate from beyond the control of my ego....how is this not the most important thing i can pour myself into???

i remember my journeys almost with photographic clarity. unfortunately, a photograph of everything is as confusing as seeing it live.... taping myself while i go (i have been slowly finding myself able to speak even when super deep...not when ego-dead (duh) but up until that point) and coming back and listening to what i have channeled has been jaw-dropping almost every time. even my voice is different sounding! :shock:

it is the memory of the right-brain that records hyperspace experiences. this memory never fades. these experiences are with you always, never fret or worry that they're somehow "slipping away". each journey flips new switches within you that will never be un-flipped.

retreaving these memories is not a matter of "doing" something....but rather the fruit of learning how to "not do" anything. meditation has almost gotten to the point of taking me back there on more than one occassion. the more the left-brain's strangle hold can be relaxed, the more the eternal right-brain can share it's wisdom... RIGHT??...right...... ;)

LOVE AND GRATITUDE!!
Click to expand...
Meditation will definately make a lot of difference. This is also why i keep urging people to at least try DMT in the form of ayahuasca. Ayahuasca seems to automatically put you in a state of deep meditation.

Meditation will harmonize your left and right brain, wich is even better than having the dominance of one replaced by the other, and will make your brain have more regular brainwave patterns ad well as more slow brainwaves, from alpha to theta.

I think that the distortion of these slow brainwaves is responsible for you not being able to remember, and this distortion occurs because of the 'shock' from smoked DMT.

With ayahuasca, you don't have this shock-effect, and so your short-term memory will not be as affected because theta waves are not decreased but even increased.

Cannabis users show more distorted and diminished theta waves. This might explain why some people are less able to remember anything from a breakthrough than others.
 
Another fun thing to mention is that ayahuasca even helps me to remember dreams that i have forgotten all about. I can visit dreams i had long ago.
Probably because of the similarity in brainwave patterns between dreaming and being on ayahuasca.
 
I would love to try Aya, but it's just not an option at this point in my life. My explorations with DMT are completely clandestine. The only people that know even a little bit about them are my fellow Nexians. I have never slept more than 5 or 6 hours a night, so after my family (wife and 2 kids) goes to sleep I need to occupy myself for several hours before I go to sleep or I wake up at 3 AM ready to start my day...

I read ALOT in these hours. That's how I discovered our beloved substance! I grabbed "DMT: The Spirit Molecule" from the science section of the bookstore (interesting cover), and here I am!:d I had been completely substance free (except a little caffeine) for 13 years after a thorough exploration of recreational substances.

I have a shop in an outbuilding on my property that I go to when it's launch time. I feel pretty comfortable being gone for a half hour or so, but I just don't see having 4-6 hours to myself anytime soon:( . My wife has essentially zero experience with ANY mind altering/enhancing substances, and consequently will never understand why I do what I do.

I have been trying to figure out a way to try pharma by controlling the length enough to feel comfortable doing it in my strange, limited situation. While I work on that idea, I mess with the combination of smoking method, dose, and MAOI hoping to hit the right "recipe" to allow more memories.


Pokey
 
I have had several higher dose,50mg+, vaped voyages that I experienced an amnesia of sorts. I remeber a miniscule ammount of the blastoff, a fair ammount of the comedown, and fragments of the peak voyage.

Recently I have been doing some meditating and low dose 20-25mg voyages before bed. I have noticed that I am having some deja vu with these lower dose voyages and I am remembering more and more of past experiences. I know it happened in a prior voyage but just couldnt bring it back the first time.

The crazy thing is I remember the voyage, sometimes it was several months prior with a couple of dozen voyages since, but I'll remember the setting or the dose and its so crazy. Total recall. Not of the whole voyage, but the bulk of it and then the little details surrounding it, ie set and setting, the weather that day or how I felt afterwards, even what I ate later on that day.

Maybe I'm reliving it to a degree with the lower doses I dont know.

Does this make sense?
 
Yes, this totally makes sense. Your brain is still bafled by what happened and is trying to figure out what happened to make some sense of it. So it will go through all the details that can be fitted within the normal order of things.
 
i've been thinking about this recently and i was wondering that maybe it has to do something with awareness...like the more aware or conscious you are the more you are able to remember. But that'S just a theory. Nevertheless i'm pretty sure that medative persons, or people who can sit on the side of the river and wach their thoughts go by will remember more.
Personally i noticed that even low mushroom trips will let my subconsciousness reveal impressions of hyperspace.
 
Maybe swim cant remember well because of his daily cannabis use. You may be right about the theta waves poly. Swim has a hard time remembering his dreams, and is pretty sure thats related to cannabis use as well. Any daily smokers here that can or cant remember? It would be cool to see any correlations.
 
Seven said:
Maybe swim cant remember well because of his daily cannabis use. You may be right about the theta waves poly. Swim has a hard time remembering his dreams, and is pretty sure thats related to cannabis use as well. Any daily smokers here that can or cant remember? It would be cool to see any correlations.
Click to expand...

Ive been smoking cannabis every day for about 7 years and I can remember my dreams easily if I spend my time trying to recapture the moment( I do as well. I love my dreams and Im in control of them...some lucky times:roll: )). I also go to new places (like new streets,hiking,or meditating.ect) and they'll snap back a picture of the event in your dreams very easily.
 
I dont smoke ganja at all I havent with any regularity for over 25 years. I remember my dreams. I dream allot when I sleep. I only have difficulty with recalling hi dosage spice voyages.
 
I smoked weed for a good part of 17 years of my life, never remembering my dreams, then one day I quit, and after two days I started remembering my dreams, such a nice feeling.

I have also had difficulty remembering my Spice trips, just snippets here and there, not sure if it has anything to do with the weed, I havent vaped much since quiting weed, but I have done a pharma trip, and I tell you now, I remember every second of it.

When I get over my shit that im sorting out, il get back to the GVG and see what I can remember.

Hopefully il have more to contribute to this thread.
 
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