DIY LSD therapy - anxiety, depression.

[Purges]

My partner has been going through a rough patch for quite some time now with regards to anxiety and depression, partly brought on by a stressful work situation, but also a more long standing malaise due to various traumas she underwent because of her alcoholic father as a child / teen.

The thing is that all of this has been putting a lot of strain on me as well, and I am trying to stay strong and be the emotionally stable one, but I am finding it difficult at the moment.

She really wants us to take some acid to help free her mind from all the negative chatter so that hopefully she can get out of this rut. Part of me thinks it will help, but part of me is terrified it will go the other way.

I need some advice. How can I make this a healing, positive experience? LSD is something I/we take very occasionally due to its rarity, and usually when we are in a good place. I plan on combining with a little dmt later on in the experience as well, and maybe preparing myself tonight with some Changa to get me into the right mindframe for a deep, healing experience tomorrow. Ideally I want to take her to see anew aya healer, but it would be too Damn expensive for us to fly somewhere and pay for treatment. She has tried all of the usual meds and councilling, but none of that has really done much, and aya retreats aren't an option in this stupid country.

 

[hopefull]

You can still do aya and personally I believe that it can be just as successful without a shaman.

 

[Purges]

I know. I am keen, and have dabbled with pharma and have many smoked journeys under my belt - but I think she feels more comfortable going this route at the moment. For some reason she has a hard time vaping adequate amounts of spice, so hasn't experienced it properly yet which frustrates us both. I will discuss doing a brew with her, but I think she feels a shaman is essential even though I have told her otherwise many times.

 

[Curb]

wow, this is troubling, if psychadelics are going to be used as a solution to a problem like this it must be purely therapeutic. i dont want to pretend i know more than anyone else on this site but it might be better and easier to obtain LSA. i find it to be alot more emotionally healing, its really the most medicinal psychadelic for me that ive ever had. i quite vividly remember crying riding home in the dark on my bicycle after excusing myself from a mates place, but crying in a good way, its so releasing. pharma at a low dose might be good, but i still think that 80% of it will be what kind of support or counselling you give during the experience. do what you feel is right, but please be careful and caring. its not my place to reccomend thing but if she is going through depression as i have alot in the past, the best thing for solid mental health is regular walking, its just good for the brain.

 

[AcaciaConfusedYah]

IMO, and purely opinion, I think a combination effort would do good for just about anyone who is willing to look for this type of therapy. LSA or LSD and mushrooms.

Coincidentally, look at the very first article listed in the Nexian Box.... "Psilocybin can inhibit the processing of negative emotions..." Take a read!

The reason I suggest a mixture of the two, LSD takes away (for me) the edge that can sometimes accompany a healthy serving of mushrooms. Ive heard others suggest MDMA in substitute for LSD/LSA, but I tend to shy away from the MDMA....

I am believer in the power of the fungi.

Good luck, friend! I hope you guys find a solution that works.

 

[Purges]

Thank you all for your thoughts so far. This is only part of our approach, there are things that need sorting out in meatspace too, namely her job. She has had positive results with LSD before and the stuff we have is very clean, strong stuff. We have 150mic each. LSA is on my to do list, but I won't be able to procure some for a while. Shrooms also are tricky at the moment. Harmalas / Aya / Spice are all abundant however. MDMA is something we have both taken a lot of in the past and the serotonin depletion afterwards may be an issue, so best avoided in this instance IMO

 

[pitubo]

In the past, I have had very positive experiences with mushrooms when dealing with these issues.

What I would recommend is to go out to nature, where you can be undisturbed by intruding busybodies. I find that wide open outdoor nature is the best place to experience psychedelics, especially for first-timers.

Start the first time with a low dose, just enough to experience a bit of the ego loosening, to get comfortable with the effects and to build trust for a deeper dive.

When your partner has obtained sufficient trust in herself, you, the setting and the mushroom, go for an immersive dose, where she can find her innermost places that are untouched by traumas of the past and stresses of the present.

When going deep the first time, it can be very reassuring to be with a person who has been there and who is at ease with the deep psychedelic state. This confidence is easily transfers from the guide to the guided. Other than that, I believe that the guide should get out of the way and keep the path clear of outside interferences to the inner process.

For me, the opportunity to rebind to long lost inner depths was among the most therapeutic aspects of the mushroom experience. A shaman may help in having confidence to yield to the immersion, but all the same they may be an obstruction to finding one's own confidence in the deeper self.

 

[Muskogee Herbman]

I'm very interested to hear how this goes. My girlfriend has some depression and anxiety issues and I foolishly gave her some LSD thinking I could guide her along, and I had no idea what I was doing, so I just tried to be there for her and make sure she wasn't losing it. She didn't have a bad trip, but I just wasn't able to help her in regards to her depression.

PURE MDMA is fantastical stuff, but is very rare to find. LSD is somewhat difficult to find, but quite amazing, and can become really beneficial after you've done it a few times. It just takes some integration and learning. I'm going to try it again with my girlfriend soonish. I might be doing mushrooms with her instead of LSD tho I'm not sure yet.

I've attached a book I found on the nexus a while ago (I think) that can help a little bit. It's worth the read. (Does anyone know what happened to the downloadable books and documentaries the Nexus used to have?)

 

[universecannon]

She really wants us to take some acid to help free her mind from all the negative chatter so that hopefully she can get out of this rut. Part of me thinks it will help, but part of me is terrified it will go the other way.

It could go a number of ways, so it's hard to say. If she decides to do it, make sure she knows that it isn't necessarily an automatic escape from that chatter. She might move right into a beautiful experience, but IME, when I am in a rough part in life, it will often take me right into it/my issues and then I either come to terms with it one way or another and move passed that stage into a great experience or get stuck in a looping rut, where hopefully some technique like singing or dancing or even contrived laughter can get me out.

It's helped my anxiety and depression greatly although a combination of approaches always works best (healthy food, exercise, yoga, meditation, writing, time in nature etc). I prefer mushrooms usually though since, for me at least, they are less risky in regards to paranoia/anxiety...The stimulation and duration of lsd can be a double edged sword. I've also had great luck with daily harmala or caapi or rue dosing.

What you put into it can reflect what you get out of it in a massive way, meaning that the more mental preparation the better my LSD trips have been.

 

[۩]

If when she does it she notices that it has had a positive impact I recommend keeping a rhythm with it for a while. Once a month, once a week, every full moon, whatever feels right. The potential is definitely there for some especially when done with the intention and focus on healing. Simple meditation in this mode can be very beneficial. Best of luck!

 

[Jox]

I see you are ste to go LSD route... But both LSD and mushrooms can cause anxiety on its own. Why not start with caapi brew, rue tea, or via pharma extract? Any will work great and it will calm the mind. All the best, and let us know how it worked out for you.
Jox

 

[Purges]

Thanks for the pdf and helpful ideas. I talked to her last night and pharma or oral harmalas and smoked dmt is back on the table. What House said about sustaining the rhythm rings true to me and we only have one dose of acid each I think that, for me anyway, DMT / harmalas have helped me look at things from multiple angles at once, which has really helped with moving on from unwanted feelings, plus the profound stillness I have experienced in the afterglow may be very therapeutic for her, the shorter action is also much more compatible with our busy schedules.

 

[deadlight]

LSD is my personal favourite psychedelic by a long shot, but i personally believe it is one of the least controllable. In my own experience, LSD has an intelligence of it's own and will teach you what it thinks you need to know at that time, not what you think you need to know.

Mushrooms i'v found are more malleable, letting you ask the questing, and receive responses.

I think people going into an LSD trip looking for particular lessons end up getting confused, sometimes damaged. Its best to let it show you what it wants

just my rather subjective and personal opinion ofcorse

 

[nexalizer]

MDMA is something we have both taken a lot of in the past and the serotonin depletion afterwards may be an issue, so best avoided in this instance IMO

What about ~300mg mescaline?

Very MDMAesque, lasts a lot longer, no hangover / serotonin depletion .. had a 2 week afterglow, and have made lasting changes to some life patterns.. at this dose, for me, it wasn't trippy at all, pretty much a healing / emotional / introspective experience..


I had no idea, and in my journal I remarked that had I known the effects, I would've had a close friend nearby.. not that the experience was diminished by going solo (moar introspection), but it's definitely doable with someone close to you, at that dose anyway.


Something to consider.

 

[Purges]

Well. My scale broke So we eyeballed doses. Smoked lots of caapi freebase to prime the old nervous system, and then layered DMT on top of that, all nice, melty feelings were had, deep meditation, that sort of thing. Until I tipped a bunch of enhanced Salvia into the bong. Instant transportation, but not jarring in the slightest, very friendly, playful, tactile. Amazing visions impossible to articulate, crying, laughing, wonderful release.

My partner wasn't able to achieve the same depth of experience, but some positive results were certainly achieved.

Oral dosing next time I think, smoking just isn't for her. Can't wait to have more time on my hands so we can eat the acid 8)

Mescaline - yet another thing on the list that I would love to experience.

 

[sigma&pi]

So, how is (or went) Your therapy? Any achievments? Can You share them here?

 

[Purges]

We only had enough for a dose of lsd each, which has made ongoing therapeutic use impossible. We have however also been doing work with Changa and experimented with AL-LAD which seems to hold promise.

The LSD journey was excellent, and certainly helped, but higher dose and follow up doses would have been ideal. During the experience Mrs.P certainly had a great time and found it beneficial and insightful, but there hasn't been a lasting change. Next on the cards is some Ayahuasca, but in the meantime meditation and yoga are our allies. I don't think psychedelics will be a magic bullet, more of an aid.

 

[pitubo]

I don't think psychedelics will be a magic bullet, more of an aid.

Compare it to a car. A car can bring you somewhere a lot faster than walking will do.

But:
- you have to actually drive the car yourself;
- you need to have a destination or else you may just run in circles;
- you must drive carefully and responsibly to avoid accidents.

Ayahuasca, particularly if heavy on harmala alkaloids, can in my experience give an even deeper affecting and longer lasting emotional reboot than "mere psychedelics" alone.

 

[Ryusaki]

I can vouch for the shrooms when it comes to depression.
I took them over 50 times when i was REALLY depressed and down, and they always helped me break out of that state.

Recently i found out that a high dose of Rue tea (>5gr) in combination with a low dose of shrooms (around 1gr) is even more powerful. A serotonin upregulation is noticeable in the following weeks, depending on the strength of the dose (4-6 weeks for me with 5/1).

 

[Mindlusion]

I am in a similar situation.

I had an LSD experience back in april, (Actually it was LSZ) I started with my typical delusional fantasy, just another hopeless return of the cycle, to recreate some grandeur experience by combining it in a cocktail with my dissociative drug of choice and then various tryptamines.


This experience altered my perspective in such a way, I cannot attribute it to the LSD alone... This experience told me everything in my life was happening for a reason, I cannot believe in coincidence. I was offered a choice I never knew I had. I chose not to.

I began to see my life was not in my own control, and I was doing things I honestly did not want to do. My addiction to drugs and alcohol, specifically ketamine and MXE.

In this experience I was faced with a choice, I choice I never thought possible, maybe a life without drugs and alcohol were possible.


Spiritual experiences aside, I believe the LSD helped me in my journey. This is where I am at a loss.

My drug addiction began with the fantastical escape with psychedelic drugs.

It seems intention is everything, but reading so much about how Iboga, Mescaline, and LSD having helped those suffering from addiction. And having experienced it myself!

To me, addiction is a disease of ego and self, you cannot separate your own created reality from what should be normal, you become so disconnected from life itself. These psychedelic drugs dissolve ego, offering a perspective that has always been there, but lost along the way.

Part of me still fears it, I fear if I were to take any drug at all, my mind would revert back to old circuits, the Obsession would return. I would lose everything. Although, part of me KNOWS that this will not happen, with proper intentions it will connect me closer to my own conception of God, the universe, and my true self.

Something is telling me to consume the cactus.

I am wondering if anyone here with alcoholism or drug addiction can relate and offer some input.

LOVE


----

side note:

There is no magic bullet. I am an addict today and I will be an addict until the day I die. What matters is how I live my life in the time I have.

In my opinion, mental illnesses like depression and anxiety, although I have no experience with them, one can see progress following the same steps for addiction. The hardest thing I ever did was ask for help, once that was done, it was in fact quite easy to learn and keep going.

All I have is a daily reprieve, change requires work and practice. Its not enough to think and believe that you can change, action is required. Its like learning something on the piano, you can read the music, study the music, memorize the notes on the page. But, you can never know how to play the music until you sit down and practice it.