Extreme fear during first higher dose

[Anamorphic]

Hello all.

I have used DMT before but it was a tiny amount that only resulted in a mandala made of the wall paper pattern appearing and a feeling of pleasant curiosity during the whole 5 minutes of it.

Today I had my second trip. I intended to take 35mg and I used what is known as a meth or oil pipe to do this but halfway through, the lighter failed just at the point that I felt unable to take any more so the dose would only have been about 18mg and as such I was mostly able to narrate the whole thing. I was very nervous before and while I was smoking it. Despite the small dose, the trip lasted 10 minutes.

My entire visual field immediately erupted into beautiful fractals which were made of rather cartoonish looking thick lines as I lay down. My eyes were closed during this time. I had a camera set up and recorded the whole thing.

00:00 started inhaling
00:25 inhaled a second time
00:40 lighter failed and was unable to take any more
00:50 Entire visual field explodes into perfect cartoonish looking fractals
01:06 "sheer perfection"
01:32 "Louder and louder"
01:42 "One, maybe a 5 Kilohertz tone getting louder and louder
01:54 "I feel that I am moving back towards the headboard"
02:01 "Still very very strong geometry"
02:10 "Remaining as awareness all the time, not getting drawn into it"
02:36 "I could be starting to come down now"
03:16 "I feel like absolute pure stillness while also"
I also felt fear at this time too but never finished the sentence as it was just overpowering
03:35 "It's coming back up again"
05:12 "I'm feeling just now incredible fear" I think the fractals at this time looked red and menacing but not as bright as they were
06:41 placed hands on chest
06:52 commented about the way the walls appeared to be moving
07:28 noticed double vision effect
08:02 I placed something over my eyes to get rid of all light
09:20 Pretty much back to reality again and I commented about how most of it was utterly terrifying.

This experience has made me scared of DMT and it was maybe stupid to start off with it. I think I maybe should have tried mushrooms before this.

What is everyone's thoughts?

 

[Jees]

Hello

As of late there are so many posts just like yours, 1 per few days, tackling the relationship with dmt-fear. If you press the SEARCH button and type "fear" (in Subject and/or Post) then you should get a ton of posts related to yours.
Sorry for this blunt answer
Perhaps others feel more like elaborating today.

 

[DmnStr8]

Stuff can get kind of freaky with DMT. Just relax and trust that you will be ok should you try again. It is possible to become overwhelmed. Breathe through it. Hum. Sing. Use your voice. Some music in the background can offer some grounding as well. Take some time and think about your experience and go back when you think you can navigate a little better, so to speak.

Jees is right this topic does come up quite often. That right there should make you feel a little better about some fears that pop up. Nothing wrong with it.. normal reaction to a strong experience.

Even if you tried mushrooms first, there is not much to prepare for a strong DMT experience. It's just in another realm. High dose mushrooms can be very similar, but lower dose shrooms woudl do little to prepare for DMT. I highly recommend you try mushrooms. In many ways shrooms are my favorite psychedelic.

Smoalk Moar!! Keep going....

 

[AcaciaConfusedYah]

Hello Anamorphic,

It can be difficult to interpret the DMT experience. Some of the things I noticed -

1) It would be incredibly difficult and uncomfortable, for me, to narrate and imagine being filmed while out of the physical body. Perhaps it is my previous experiences and expectations, but I would find those components as distracting. I know that it may seem like more records can help solve the puzzle, but really it adds layers of distraction. Rather than experience everything to its entirety, and give in to the experience, you may have to put forth conscious effort at attempting to analyze and articulate the ineffable. My advice, don't record. Don't speak. Just "listen" with your mind.

2) This isn't everyone's preference, but I like either complete darkness or a very dimly lit room if I am going to smoke DMT at night. If during the day, then I prefer to be outside in full light, or mild shade. (Even if the eyes are closed the entire time)

3) There had to be some beauty and "perfection" in the experience. Just because it may have ended in "fear" doesn't mean it should be feared. Hehehe, I remember one of my more difficult experiences. I was blasted into a realm with a large, angry, hyper-dimensional jungle cat, and it was PISSED off to see me. I remember being shredded into billions of little pieces. The whole time I was thinking to myself, "Just be cool... it'll be over soon... With any luck you'll forget this ever happened." (Considering how some aspects of a DMT experiences are quickly forgotten). NOPE, not that one. Remembered that one very clearly. LOL. It doesn't mean I have stopped, it just caused me to assess my position in life and see what kind of influences would instigate such a response.



So, my advice - kill the lights (or dim them), turn off the camera, and allow yourself to let go of the notion of "this" reality. Leave the fears of this reality behind. When you decide to smoke again, assure that you're in a healthy mental position, and don't put too much stress on trying to over-analyze. Some lessons are later learned.....

Should you have started with mushrooms, first? Too late for that, now! But, it wouldn't hurt to familiarize yourself with mushrooms while you're integrating this experience. Maybe the mushrooms will offer some insight. :thumb_up:

Take Care,
ACY

 

[Anamorphic]

Thank you very much everyone, I will not be doing psychedelics again for about two months until I can get some mushrooms. For the mushrooms, I will just try one gram then 2, 4, and finally 5 if I can manage, all in silent darkness. I will only have the mushrooms and DMT when I can greatly reduce my pre trip nervousness. I think the DMT and other drugs greatly amplify this so if I get myself into a positive and peaceful mindset, I may do better.

 

[Jees]

...this topic does come up quite often...

For our convenience there's this link now.

 

[Sabnock1990]

Thank you very much everyone, I will not be doing psychedelics again for about two months until I can get some mushrooms. For the mushrooms, I will just try one gram then 2, 4, and finally 5 if I can manage, all in silent darkness. I will only have the mushrooms and DMT when I can greatly reduce my pre trip nervousness. I think the DMT and other drugs greatly amplify this so if I get myself into a positive and peaceful mindset, I may do better.

Get yourself some dried Lemon Balm leaf for Lemon Balm tea, use 3 to 4 grams of Lemon Balm to make the tea and consume the tea with your Psychedelic of choice, it'll reduce anxiety/intensity/tension/stress/panic/fear, and smooth out the come up, while still providing a very powerful experience. Seriously, check it out, it can come in handy. Works well with mushrooms, 4-ACO-DMT, oral DMT/Aya, might even be able to drink it say 30 minutes before vaping DMT. Trust me, DMT with the Lemon Balm is so much smoother and gentler compared to without the Lemon Balm. Lemon Balm contains an active called Rosmarinic Acid which inhibits GABA Transaminase which in turn raises GABA levels a bit, so it definitely works pretty well.

 

[Northerner]

DMT is scary the first time at a higher dose Anamorphic. I remember my first time, being shot down a square tunnel and then feeling my teeth explode into little bits in my mouth, heart pounding in my chest. Then came various insanities, each one as improbable as the last. I talked myself down "it's just a substance, it will be over soon" and sure enough it was.

I did it again half an hour later and it was much better. Brilliantly beautiful.

It's just that first time that's the kicker, there's no real way to prepare for it. Once you've seen it the first time you have some sort of idea what to expect so it's not such a shock.