Fear the Jesters -- My Most Recent Journey

[stoopkidpzpz]

Hello everyone! This is my first time posting here so be gentle

I recently embarked on a journey, using breakthrough (~40mg, weighed out) doses four times in a row. Waking from one astral journey, loading my cannon, and then blasting off again. Everything was going good... Until the 4th dose.

Dose 1 --

I had been fasting for a full 24 hours and I did multiple meditations, my mind and body were ready for this. Pure white odorless crystals, ready to take me to hyperspace. I loaded up the pipe and took a few good hits. Fractal patterns engulfed me, a strange buzzing tone played through my head, and I no longer knew where I was. I encountered a few entities in white robes, beckoning me... They wanted me to go somewhere with them. They were speaking to me, but everything they were saying seemed to echo and it was in an alien language I could not understand. I woke up, ready to go again and follow these beings.

Dose 2 --

Here I go, another 40mg dose. More fractals, more buzzing, more strange talking. This time I met a goddess figure in a large crystalline temple. The word "mother" kept echoing and then melting in to the buzzing tone in the background. She held a large jug up to me and started pouring sparkling water in to a crystal pool at my feet. "Drink" she said. So I did. I woke up, wondering what could possibly come next.

Dose 3 --

Ready to see what this 'Mother Goddess' had in store for me I loaded my pipe up and launched myself off again. A white light took over my vision. Purple, green, gold, and black fractals began waving around my head. Echoed talking was more intense. Then, it happened... a group of jesters appeared. They had elongated faces, faces which I couldn't make out... They appeared to just be made of light. They were wearing the classic 3-pronged medieval jester hats. They seemed slightly threatening, dancing around my head and speaking frantically -- their voices echoing all around me. It was like I had entered their realm and they did not want me there.

Dose 4 --

I wasn't done with these jesters yet, I wanted to know more. I loaded up another dose and blasted off. This is when things got bad. I laid back and closed my eyes, like usual. But this time I felt a heat wave go from my toes and my fingers all the way to the center of my chest, and with this heat wave it felt as though every bit of my body it touched it was erasing. It felt as though my body was destroyed. I saw a white light while this was happening, and then the same purple, green, gold, and black fractals as before. Once the heat wave was over I took an insane notice to my heart, it was all I could hear... all I could feel. It felt to me as though my heart was beating insanely fast, then... I felt as though I was launched out of a cannon. I was no longer in my body, I knew it... I was dead, I was in cardiac arrest, something was wrong. I felt an IMMENSE amount of fear and became incredibly anxious... I began to panic. This was bad. I forced open my eyes. The objects in the room I was in all had a black outline and they all had very simple geometry. For example, the ceiling fan above me which is made of many complex lines as well as multiple colors appeared to be of very, very simple geometry and was only a flat black color. I don't know, it is very hard to explain. I couldn't move, I couldn't talk. I didn't know where I was, all I knew is that I wanted this feeling to end. I didn't want to be dead. Finally I was able to turn my head to the side, I noticed a poster of mine, I could make out the details... This was peace of mind... I began to calm down. I looked ahead of me and saw my friend sitting there on his computer, not paying any attention to me.. I knew this was a good thing because if I was truly dying he would not just be sitting there. After a few minutes, or what felt like minutes, I sat up. "Do you have any water in that cup?", those were my first words. "Nope" my friend said. I stood up, thinking I was going to get water. Nope. I was still hallucinating. I felt like a statue, I felt like I couldn't move. I turned to my friend,"I can't move, I think I'm still tripping"... "SIT DOWN MAN" he said, and laughed. I sat down and it took a few minutes for my journey to fully end. When it was over I was so relieved. Those damn jesters really, really did not want me in their realm.

~

So, what can you all gather from my experiences? What is your explanation for my fourth journey? Why was it so violent and terrifying? I don't know what to make of all of this. You opinions are welcomed!

 

[null24]

Ha! The damned jesters! Check out my "about the time I ran from the jesters" post for my first encounter with these dudes. From what I gather, your first couple experiences gifted you with something that you were supposed to work with (what was the water? What was it's purpose?), but instead of taking that gift and integrating it, you wanted more.

The jesters block the door when we are being silly. They jumped into my reality when I tried to take a journey at the wrong time. Actually, there were a lot of things things wrong with the circumstances surrounding the time they messed with me in the linked post that leads me to the conclusion here. Sounds like you encountered the High Priestess (Tarot archetype), and she, as represented in the Tarot, jealously guards the secret of the Mysteries. Then again, it might have nothing to do with that at all....

Oh, and welcome to this wonderful place, I encourage you to get to know it, there's more and better information here in one place on this strange subject. Here's to finding out what it IS all about, and till we do friend,
HAPPY TRAILS TO YOU!¡!

 

[stoopkidpzpz]

Nice post :thumb_up:

That is true, I did want more. I wanted to know the significance of the water, I wanted to know the significance of the High Priestess visiting me. I should have probably just ended it there, haha.

I actually just got done experimenting with DMT once more. I did it about 2 times. The first dose landed me in a strange circus with human-like clowns everywhere. Not scary clowns, I don't know.. They are kind of hard to explain. The fractal patterns were very intense. It was a strange experience, and when I started to come back to reality I felt as though I was having an orgasm. :shock:

The second time I kept my eyes open, the entire world around me became unrecognizable. Just intense visuals all around me, strange sound distortion. No contact with entities though. A few minutes in I started to feel like I had to urinate... BAD. I couldn't hold it... I was able to get up and make it to the bathroom, hallucinating the entire time. The whole house seemed INSANELY big and all of colors in all of the rooms were incredibly strange.

One thing I have noticed is that I get a heavy feeling in my chest when I get good doses of DMT and it always makes me nervous, it makes me feel like I am having a heart attack or something is very wrong. Is this normal? What could be causing this feeling?

Also, thank you for the welcoming

 

[DeDao]

Sorry you had a bad experience.
So each dose you took was right after the previous?
Thanks for sharing your experiences.

Actually, I can relate a tiny bit with the redosing thing.
Nowadays, I am basically afraid to redose just because of previous experiences where I redose and it ends up being too powerful.​

 

[HumbleTraveler]

Ive never gone back in that many times. Usually even at my second jump back in I've felt very unwelcome like theres a ton of sharp yellow eyes of black shadowy figures gazing at me. I stick to one from now on just so as not to overdo anything.

 

[stoopkidpzpz]

Yeah, I'm beginning to think if I don't breakthrough entirely the first time I should probably not re-dose, and if i do... At least wait a few hours.

 

[dark-king]

Thank you for the interesting report.
I don't read often about 4 consecutive doses

Sorry to hear about the bad trip. I have some questions about it though:

I felt a heat wave go from my toes and my fingers all the way to the center of my chest, and with this heat wave it felt as though every bit of my body it touched it was erasing. It felt as though my body was destroyed.

Did this feel anyhow painful ? Could you feel anything or more like were starting to feel less and less body surface ?

I was no longer in my body, I knew it... I was dead, I was in cardiac arrest, something was wrong. I felt an IMMENSE amount of fear and became incredibly anxious... I began to panic. This was bad. I forced open my eyes. The objects in the room I was in all had a black outline and they all had very simple geometry. For example, the ceiling fan above me which is made of many complex lines as well as multiple colors appeared to be of very, very simple geometry and was only a flat black color. I don't know, it is very hard to explain. I couldn't move, I couldn't talk. I didn't know where I was, all I knew is that I wanted this feeling to end. I didn't want to be dead. Finally I was able to turn my head to the side, I noticed a poster of mine, I could make out the details... This was peace of mind... I began to calm down.

How long did it feel like ? Did you feel being stuck for 1 h ? 10 ? forever ?
could you think lucid thoughts during this and couldn't you reassure yourself that you just took DMT and have to wait a bit more until you return to normal ?
(especially since you just been to hyperspace 3 times in a row and so you must have somehow trained your thought process during the first experiences.

also how long did this trip feel compared the the 3 positive ones ?
same length ? a lot longer / shorter ?
did you at any time feel any real pain or just like discomforting sensations ?

 

[stoopkidpzpz]

Did this feel anyhow painful ? Could you feel anything or more like were starting to feel less and less body surface ?

When it got to my chest I felt quite a bit of discomfort, that is what made me start to panic. I thought something went wrong with my heart. I felt less and less body surface, the heat was like an eraser... Just erasing me from existence.

How long did it feel like ? Did you feel being stuck for 1 h ? 10 ? forever ?

I felt like I was going to be stuck in hyperspace forever.

could you think lucid thoughts during this and couldn't you reassure yourself that you just took DMT and have to wait a bit more until you return to normal ?
(especially since you just been to hyperspace 3 times in a row and so you must have somehow trained your thought process during the first experiences.

I couldn't reassure myself at all. My mind was racing so fast, the hallucinations were so powerful. Nothing could have prepared me for this feeling, even though I had been in hyperspace 3 times right before this. Positive hyperspace is a much different place than negative hyperspace.

also how long did this trip feel compared the the 3 positive ones ?
same length ? a lot longer / shorter ?

It felt A LOT longer.

did you at any time feel any real pain or just like discomforting sensations ?

I mainly just felt discomforting sensations, such as pressure in my chest right before I blasted off.

 

[Trypfinite]

Were you more fearful/anxious before you started this session, or in between doses. Why so many? Why not just us an MAOI

 

[stoopkidpzpz]

Were you more fearful/anxious before you started this session, or in between doses. Why so many? Why not just us an MAOI

I was not fearful or anxious at all. Just because, I wanted to see how far I could go. MAOIs make me slightly nervous for some reason.

 

[jungleDNBplz]

you should try vaping after eating crushed/grinded syrian rue seeds in capsules. it helps to flatten out the ego and prevent it from warping the experience analytically. feels better, goes deeper, comes on more smoothly. just all around way better with MAOI's

 

[jungleDNBplz]

you should try vaping after eating crushed/grinded syrian rue seeds in capsules. it helps to flatten out the ego and prevent it from warping the experience analytically. feels better, goes deeper, comes on more smoothly. just all around way better with MAOI's

 

[Global]

The thing about vaping multiple times in a row is that the game of roulette becomes more intense as the stakes seem to go up. In other words, you can wind up with an incredible trip, or a horrific one. You really need to have firmly planted in your brain that you can't die, you'll be coming back no matter what, reality will reassemble itself quickly and thoroughly no matter how far out you've gone, and it will all be over soon. These thoughts should be embedded so firmly in your head that if you should get the thought that you're dead or dying on DMT, you have the reflexive thought that you can't die, there's nothing to worry about, and to endure the onslaught or whatever might be playing out. You may want it to be over, but patience is a virtue, and it goes a long way, especially considering that these kinds of experiences are about as short as you can get.

 

[stoopkidpzpz]

you should try vaping after eating crushed/grinded syrian rue seeds in capsules. it helps to flatten out the ego and prevent it from warping the experience analytically. feels better, goes deeper, comes on more smoothly. just all around way better with MAOI's

How many grams/milligrams, and how long should I wait after ingesting the seeds? I have heard of freebase harmaline and harmala, extracted from Syrian Rue seeds. How many milligrams of extracted harmala freebase should be used?

The thing about vaping multiple times in a row is that the game of roulette becomes more intense as the stakes seem to go up. In other words, you can wind up with an incredible trip, or a horrific one. You really need to have firmly planted in your brain that you can't die, you'll be coming back no matter what, reality will reassemble itself quickly and thoroughly no matter how far out you've gone, and it will all be over soon. These thoughts should be embedded so firmly in your head that if you should get the thought that you're dead or dying on DMT, you have the reflexive thought that you can't die, there's nothing to worry about, and to endure the onslaught or whatever might be playing out. You may want it to be over, but patience is a virtue, and it goes a long way, especially considering that these kinds of experiences are about as short as you can get.

Thank you for the words of wisdom. I have been trying to plant that idea in my mind for a loooong time... Guess I need to keep working at it, haha. Also, do you have any idea why I felt pressure in my chest? Was it all in my head or could it have actually been related to my heart?

 

[Global]

There's all sorts of perceptible exerted forces within the experiences. It would be difficult to say what you were experiencing, but especially with entities in the picture, there can be a lot of strange sensations induced.

 

[stoopkidpzpz]

There's all sorts of perceptible exerted forces within the experiences. It would be difficult to say what you were experiencing, but especially with entities in the picture, there can be a lot of strange sensations induced.

I see. I have a terrible anxiety problem, which causes me to focus on my heart A LOT... I always think I'm having a heart attack, lol. I'm sure the DMT exacerbated that anxiety.

 

[CatchThirtyThr33]

I second HumbleTraveller's post. Every time I try dosing multiple times, I always get a very distinct feeling that I shouldn't have. I feel quite unwelcome. They seem much friendlier when I space my experiences out.

 

[stoopkidpzpz]

I second HumbleTraveller's post. Every time I try dosing multiple times, I always get a very distinct feeling that I shouldn't have. I feel quite unwelcome. They seem much friendlier when I space my experiences out.

Yeah, the first trip involving the jesters made me feel very unwelcome, but I wanted to see what would happen if I went further. I learned my lesson. Lol.