There is definitely a drain of ones energies when facilitating DMT experiences for family members.
This weekend I was placed into a position wherein I facilitated journeys for my mother, my father (both in their 60s) and my sister (30s).
The emotional spin of sitting to the sides of a family member as they take their respective doses would probably be apparent to any seasoned onlooker, mainly via the seemingly instinctive mirroring in my own movements of every little perceived facial gesture or body movement displayed during the journey. Kind of like a sports fan watching a million near misses and goals in succession perhaps.
While I am sat to said side in readiness (After vape assist, I usually take my position seated cross legged nearby and out of immediate visual sight) normally I would not be overly watching over any person undertaking this. Reason being would be to minimise any potential self consciousness issue for the participant.
Not this time, perhaps obviously. This being blood relations, wanting life changing moments, with an apparent grasp and partial understanding of the depths of what they were potentially asking me.
I would guess that part of this far more noticeable 'drain' I am feeling comes from knowing that in my parents case, that these are people who have never really dabbled in any kind of 'drugs' before yet knew of what I was undertaking with this molecule (as such did the usual of grabbing hold of the spirit molecule document, googling terms such as Graham Hancock etc).
The respect of open disclosure has never really been an issue within my family, though our family has sure had a few others in it's time. As such, in the past I had found it easy to disclose what I had undertaken with this molecule, along with the results.
I was still somewhat surprised when they came to me this very weekend during a gathering of our family (probably the last before retirement means people moving on etc) and were wanting me to facilitate this experience for them. I had not made any mention of it prior in some months.
The experiences ranged from the classically beautiful through to your harrowing ego death moment and one freaky as hell moment that was like a scene from the exorcist. All in all however everyone gained massively and said they felt like it was more than a worthwhile set of experiences.
It also offered me much confirmation in my own integration, in ways I may expand upon, just as I am hoping to relay experience reports from each member of my family when they get time to think over what they have been through today.
End note. This was without a doubt the oddest weekend of my life and one I doubt will be ever truly topped for the surreal factor.
This weekend I was placed into a position wherein I facilitated journeys for my mother, my father (both in their 60s) and my sister (30s).
The emotional spin of sitting to the sides of a family member as they take their respective doses would probably be apparent to any seasoned onlooker, mainly via the seemingly instinctive mirroring in my own movements of every little perceived facial gesture or body movement displayed during the journey. Kind of like a sports fan watching a million near misses and goals in succession perhaps.
While I am sat to said side in readiness (After vape assist, I usually take my position seated cross legged nearby and out of immediate visual sight) normally I would not be overly watching over any person undertaking this. Reason being would be to minimise any potential self consciousness issue for the participant.
Not this time, perhaps obviously. This being blood relations, wanting life changing moments, with an apparent grasp and partial understanding of the depths of what they were potentially asking me.
I would guess that part of this far more noticeable 'drain' I am feeling comes from knowing that in my parents case, that these are people who have never really dabbled in any kind of 'drugs' before yet knew of what I was undertaking with this molecule (as such did the usual of grabbing hold of the spirit molecule document, googling terms such as Graham Hancock etc).
The respect of open disclosure has never really been an issue within my family, though our family has sure had a few others in it's time. As such, in the past I had found it easy to disclose what I had undertaken with this molecule, along with the results.
I was still somewhat surprised when they came to me this very weekend during a gathering of our family (probably the last before retirement means people moving on etc) and were wanting me to facilitate this experience for them. I had not made any mention of it prior in some months.
The experiences ranged from the classically beautiful through to your harrowing ego death moment and one freaky as hell moment that was like a scene from the exorcist. All in all however everyone gained massively and said they felt like it was more than a worthwhile set of experiences.
It also offered me much confirmation in my own integration, in ways I may expand upon, just as I am hoping to relay experience reports from each member of my family when they get time to think over what they have been through today.
End note. This was without a doubt the oddest weekend of my life and one I doubt will be ever truly topped for the surreal factor.
