First Bufo experience ( 5-MEO-DMT, 5-OH-DMT )

[AstralRoots]

My experience was nothing like a single testimony I absorbed. That is not to say that a number of elements weren't fully relatable, don't get me wrong, it's just that it was so unique to me that all of my expectations were obliterated.

I was very nervous and was very thankful that my facilitator spent a great deal of time with me prior to absorption. We connected as humans, worked with the Tarot a bit, did a little breathwork and bam I was "ready".

Unfortunately or fortunately: I only remember around half of each go. To put this into perspective I chose to have it recorded as I wanted to see myself afterward. I noted numerous points of the experience in hindsight in viewing the footage that I have no conscious recollection of. That is very weird and I wonder what was going on during those moments.

I had a sort of an NDE via a suicide attempt 15 short years ago wherein I also blacked out though too had profound moments of lucidity afterward. Off topic but not entirely: I'll get back to this.

My body took the amount of the medicine that was right. She didn't serve large portions but more light to medium though I went super deep each time. Then again, I have no reference to compare the dosage volume to. The moment I exhaled I lost consciousness however always ended up in hyper lucid states of: extreme somatic release (screaming, purging darkness, crying, laughing, and feeling love), extremely unique tastes of the "secret" of life/death, psychological terror/horror and I mean this maximally, and alas beauteous moments of loving connection to my facilitator & God.

I intimately entered into rapport with my inner child (crying as I write this as it's still alive) and felt all of the pain endured as an emotionally abused/neglected little boy. It was such a gift to be seen and held by a caring and compassionate woman who showed up for me at that point of super rawness. The wisdom she shared felt as if she was a legit expression of the Divine Mother herself. As woo as that sounds, it was a tangible experience which is ultimately wordless.

I had a moment of timeless limitless love/joy in connection with both my Soul and the Soul of Akura (guide). The notion of whether the Soul exists or not isn't a question in these deep medicinal states in my experience. The shared testimonies of being one with everyone and everything was experienced here to some degree as I felt no separation between self and other. The profound beauty of these moments was heart opening and full of tears from oceanic depth.

I had a moment of death which was deeply unsettling and profound. I was dying and didn't break through that fear. I cannot share the specificity of the feeling as it's so unique to my psyche however I can say it shook me to the core. What's weird to me is the amount of experienced unconsciousness which doesn't seem ubiquitous across experiences. I once heard of a phenomenon of a "ring pass not" which is essentially a boundary which cannot be penetrated unless the Soul is capable/ready. It comes to mind as perhaps in my unconsciousness I did "break through" but it wasn't to be remembered at this time. It is also rumored that whilst one goes unconcious one is undergoing deep healing and that one isn't ''supposed'' to remember. Perhaps the trauma is too unsettling to the being so the blacking out is a safety/defense mechanism. Lots of speculation.

I had moments of confusion as in what the heck did I just do, what the heck am I doing, and who the heck is this person. She knew that and took great care in making me feel safe and secure. I surrendered to her and was very glad that I did. With that said I can't imagine the hell people endure with this process with a-holes who shouldn't be facilitating this medicine at all. The degree of vulnerability is outrageous: please get to know your person at least a bit prior to committing to these processes.

I had a purge of my lifetime. It felt akin to an exorcism and I mean EXORCISM. The depths from which the darkness inside of my being was coming was out of this world. Old shit, potentially past life shit. But also this life shit. My lineages shit, societies shit, but also entirely my shit. The primal screams as this darkness and pain exited my being into the convenient purge bucket must have been heard and felt in all places in the cosmos. I genuinely believe they call it medicine work for a reason.

I had a moment of a hyper state of telepathic communion with Akura which was too short to be honest. It was a point in which she was literally aiding in the process of the purification of my bio energetic system. I won't get too woo with all the ideologies around parasitic infections and where those may or may not latch on but will say it could be true that there is validity in the phenomenology of curses/hexes/spells or simply samskaras/karmic-ripenings. I realize these words are words and are entirely unique to my constitution, idiosyncrasy, life, and soul's journey. Nevertheless it's the best I can do.


I have a lucid memory of "dealing" with my suicidality which was absolutely profound. I remember my guide speaking words to me which assisted me in the "choosing of life". The realization of the eternal nature of Life was also alive. The depth of this element of the experience will never be forgotten. A precious gift of Divine intervention. Also to say since the ceremony my mind feels different. Certain self loathing thoughts are becoming more squelched or another path is being trodden. I wholeheartedly believe in the medicinal capacities of these medicines to get to the heart of ones matter to assist one in healing oneself!


All in all after all of that I feel the same as I did before the healing working. That is not to say that I don't feel an increase in lucidity, somewhat of an increase in joy, increase in desire to give/receive love, increase in desire to integrate/stabilize my life, and some really profound dreams. It's just that I certainly do not feel like it was any sort of a magic pill that generates overnight transformation. I wish it was like that but that's simply not how it works.

I will say I foresee the integration as being as profound as the ceremony. I will work with this medicine again beyond doubt. I know that with a more somatically aligned/cleared bio-system the experience can be much different than it was for me my first time. Coming into this medicine stable is essential unless you want to play Russian roulette however this is just my two cents. Psychologically unstable individuals can get screwed royally which became tantamountly clear in my sitting.

Thanks for reading and take good care

TLDR; Bufo is an incredible medicine. I do and do not recommend it. It can be life changing and life shattering if unprepared or without proper guidance.

 

[AstralRoots]

Upon day two, I have had no reactivation experiences.

I did have to pull over to cry and purge energetically. I feel the medicine in my system for sure.

I have had some synchronicities which arent worth putting into words.

All in all, rather floored at the capacity of this medicine.

 

[Bas Sarkin]

Wow, that was very intense. I have not used 5-meo-dmt yet myself, but I read that blackouts can mean the dosage is a bit too high, but it could also be perfect, as you did remember a lot.

I was dying and didn't break through that fear.

Its a very human emotion to fear death. I did hear that to reach a state of 'oneness with god' or 'non-duality', you should overcome that fear, let it go. Your body nor your soul will die permanently. So why fear it. Its a bit like swimming for the first time. You can only enjoy it, relax, if you know you wont die, but still: it feels a bit like struggling against death.

Its paradoxical, that to really realise and enjoy the beauty of life, you must first be able to let go of it.

All in all after all of that I feel the same as I did before the healing working.

You healed and learned a lot. Now you need to integrated your new found knowledge into your life, to let it take effect.


Compliments to Akura, and to you, for daring to go so deep.

 

[AstralRoots]

update: my dreams continue to be super intense though shrouded in terms of clear recollecting. Last night I waked in a state akin to awakening from unconsciousness whilst In the medicine state. At the time, I had clear messages coming to me and found myself somatically active. Specifically I was stretching, cracking my back and neck, and breathing heavily. I felt some fear and shock. Very bizarre no doubt but ultimately feels medicinal and a continuation of the process.

The impact on my thinking continues to be a much appreciated phenomenon. I am awakening feeling different than before this ceremony. I had a small lump in my forehead which has persisted for a few months which I analyze regularly. Strangely enough, it's diminishing and is suddenly almost gone.

It's strange and subtle but do continue to feel the presence of the medicine in my system. It's also strange to say that I foresee a significant event in the future as a continuation of the process.

 

[AstralRoots]

Wow, that was very intense. I have not used 5-meo-dmt yet myself, but I read that blackouts can mean the dosage is a bit too high, but it could also be perfect, as you did remember a lot.

Its a very human emotion to fear death. I did hear that to reach a state of 'oneness with god' or 'non-duality', you should overcome that fear, let it go. Your body nor your soul will die permanently. So why fear it. Its a bit like swimming for the first time. You can only enjoy it, relax, if you know you wont die, but still: it feels a bit like struggling against death.

Its paradoxical, that to really realise and enjoy the beauty of life, you must first be able to let go of it.

You healed and learned a lot. Now you need to integrated your new found knowledge into your life, to let it take effect.


Compliments to Akura, and to you, for daring to go so deep.

Greetings. Well said. No doubt, the doses were hefty. I actually edited my original post to reflect this. Nevertheless, I feel it was an appropriate amount as some views circulate which suggest whilst your unconscious deep healing is occuring. In viewing the video footage, I can certainly see that whilst unconscious I was exceedingly somatically active which leads me to believe deeeeeeeeep processing was taking place. Had I not had such a proficent "shamanista" I deduce the experience could have been worlds different. I don't use the word shaman lightly: I experienced this human as competent in working in multiple dimensions.

Thanks for your comment.

 

[Varallo]

Hi there just a somewhat practical question is this an experience with 5-hydroxy-N,N-dimethyltryptamine (5-HO-DMT) or
5-MeO-DMT (5-methoxy-N,N-dimethyltryptamine), I think based on your story it is the latter. There is something confusing about the naming of these tryptamines, Bufotenin is 5-HO-DMT, it has bufo in the name and that sometimes leads to confusion since 5-MeO-DMT is also sometimes referred to as toad venom or bufo, Both are very different in there effects so it’s worth noting it what substance is used in what experience.

 

[AstralRoots]

Hi there just a somewhat practical question is this an experience with 5-hydroxy-N,N-dimethyltryptamine (5-HO-DMT) or
5-MeO-DMT (5-methoxy-N,N-dimethyltryptamine), I think based on your story it is the latter. There is something confusing about the naming of these tryptamines, Bufotenin is 5-HO-DMT, it has bufo in the name and that sometimes leads to confusion since 5-MeO-DMT is also sometimes referred to as toad venom or bufo, Both are very different in there effects so it’s worth noting it what substance is used in what experience.

Greetings.

I sincerely appreciate your comment as it led me to discover that the secretion of the Bufo Alvarius toad includes both HO & MEO.

In my absorption of copious testimonies of both 5-meo (synthetic pure) & Bufo: many deduce that they are actually quite similar in ultimate effect. No doubt there are differences. Some who have had both state the ''end effect'' is one in the same.

"Bufo toads contain bufotenine (5-OH-DMT) and an alkaloid tryptamine (5-MeO-DMT), a potent hallucinogenic. Experts have concluded that psychotropic effects are most likely from contact with B. alvarius." https://www.sciencedirect.com/topics/neuroscience/bufotenin

Some say the secretion contains 5-25% 5-meo-DMT though this is not confirmed.

 

[Transform]

Wow, that sounds like an intense experience. The after-effects seem quite remarkable too, so I hope you feel you can get appropriate support should you need it. I think I would be wary of imprint vulnerability in your situation.

"Bufo toads contain bufotenine (5-OH-DMT) and an alkaloid tryptamine (5-MeO-DMT), a potent hallucinogenic. Experts have concluded that psychotropic effects are most likely from contact with B. alvarius".

Point of clarification - bufotenine is a tryptamine alkaloid too.

It would be a good idea to attribute your quotes as well. The last sentence sounds bafflingly vague being quoted out of context here!

I'd also be intrigued to know what you mean by saying the 5-MeO-DMT content is an unconfirmed figure. Clearly, any given secretion of Incillius alvarius venom will vary in content, but having the percentage expressed as a range suggests that multiple analyses have been carried out.

Of course, this isn't the same as analysing every single batch of toad venom - but it might be an additional argument for using either synthetic material or isolated alkaloids extracted from plants, on top of the existing conservation and animal welfare concerns.

 

[Varallo]

Actually there is some research on this and I’ll put the paper here for your reference.

From the abstract, The tryptamine present in the highest concentrations was 5-MeO-DMT (mean ± SD: 410,000 ± 30,000 μg/g). Mean concentrations of 5-MeO-tryptamine (490 ± 260 μg/g), 5-HO-N-methyltryptamine (270 ± 120 μg/g), bufotenin (2,800 ± 1,900 μg/g) and DMT (250 ± 80 μg/g) showed a relatively high variability between individual samples. The comprehensive analytical reference data of Incilius alvarius poison presented here might prove useful for forensic chemists.

From this one can see that the bufotenin is only 0,28% of the secretion, and 41% ± 3% for 5-MeO-DMT, based on that and having smoked both in there pure form I’m pretty confident that the effects you describe are completely attributable to the 5-MeO-DMT and not the bufotenin.

 

[AstralRoots]

Wow, that sounds like an intense experience. The after-effects seem quite remarkable too, so I hope you feel you can get appropriate support should you need it. I think I would be wary of imprint vulnerability in your situation.

Point of clarification - bufotenine is a tryptamine alkaloid too.

It would be a good idea to attribute your quotes as well. The last sentence sounds bafflingly vague being quoted out of context here!

I'd also be intrigued to know what you mean by saying the 5-MeO-DMT content is an unconfirmed figure. Clearly, any given secretion of Incillius alvarius venom will vary in content, but having the percentage expressed as a range suggests that multiple analyses have been carried out.

Of course, this isn't the same as analysing every single batch of toad venom - but it might be an additional argument for using either synthetic material or isolated alkaloids extracted from plants, on top of the existing conservation and animal welfare concerns.

Can you please elucidate on the phenomenon of "imprint vulnerability"?

Added the link from the quotation, thank you. Thanks for the clarification.

Understood. I am simply referencing an anecdote I read on Reddit (not reliable, ha).

Yes. Conservation and ethical harvesting seem essential. My facilitator stated it's coming from a tribe that rightly extracts. I genuinely hope it's the case, how can one know? I am both compelled and not compelled to work with the synthetic variant. I am more eager to sit with the frog secretion again in the future as I am not familiar with it. I wonder if the 5-meo pure variant would have illicited the same ''healing'' response somatically/emotionally/psychologically.

Thanks again.

 

[AstralRoots]

Actually there is some research on this and I’ll put the paper here for your reference.

From the abstract, The tryptamine present in the highest concentrations was 5-MeO-DMT (mean ± SD: 410,000 ± 30,000 μg/g). Mean concentrations of 5-MeO-tryptamine (490 ± 260 μg/g), 5-HO-N-methyltryptamine (270 ± 120 μg/g), bufotenin (2,800 ± 1,900 μg/g) and DMT (250 ± 80 μg/g) showed a relatively high variability between individual samples. The comprehensive analytical reference data of Incilius alvarius poison presented here might prove useful for forensic chemists.

From this one can see that the bufotenin is only 0,28% of the secretion, and 41% ± 3% for 5-MeO-DMT, based on that and having smoked both in there pure form I’m pretty confident that the effects you describe are completely attributable to the 5-MeO-DMT and not the bufotenin.

Very, very interesting. Even very small amounts of psychoactives can have impact on those especially sensitive. The only way to know would be to work with 5-meo pure/proper. Tbh, having worked with aya, the 'full-spectrum' quality of the secretion of the frog may provide a significant difference in effect psycho-somatically. My reference would be DMT vs aya though I realize this is highly anecdotal.

 

[Varallo]

It’s not really an equal comparison because the amounts relative to each other have very different quantities, but I do understand your point, personally I’m of the opinion that these very small quantities don’t really have any noticeable effect on the experience other than that they perpetuate self suggestion of perceived effects. I personally have only smoked synthetic 5-MeO-DMT and crystalline bufotenin, there effects are worlds apart.

Anyway one more thing I would like to add is that there is no evidence of traditional use of 5-MeO-Dmt in its current format of smoking toad venom, so going the natural way is not really anything more than giving in to the marketing of authenticity. Therefore please consider using the synthetic version as this will help to conserve the life of the toad, the recent increase in demand is now already pushing these toads to more and more remote places and if we keep on going to milk them we will soon have none left at all.

Now I wil stop derailing your thread with my remarks.

All the best to you and your journey.

 

[AstralRoots]

It’s not really an equal comparison because the amounts relative to each other have very different quantities, but I do understand your point, personally I’m of the opinion that these very small quantities don’t really have any noticeable effect on the experience other than that they perpetuate self suggestion of perceived effects. I personally have only smoked synthetic 5-MeO-DMT and crystalline bufotenin, there effects are worlds apart.

Anyway one more thing I would like to add is that there is no evidence of traditional use of 5-MeO-Dmt in its current format of smoking toad venom, so going the natural way is not really anything more than giving in to the marketing of authenticity. Therefore please consider using the synthetic version as this will help to conserve the life of the toad, the recent increase in demand is now already pushing these toads to more and more remote places and if we keep on going to milk them we will soon have none left at all.

Now I wil stop derailing your thread with my remarks.

All the best to you and your journey.

I hear you.

Mescaline vs peyote
DMT vs aya
Bufo vs 5-meo .. etc

Some prefer the raw/whole version whereas others do not. To say the natural way is nothing more than marketing is folly in my view. Though to each their own. But to say one's view is superior and the others inferior, well.. I just don't see it that way. However ethically speaking I certainly give your sentiment credence as even before you chiming in it has been on my Heart.

Not a derailment to my thread. Your comments are welcome.

Best to you too!

 

[Varallo]

Some prefer the raw/whole version whereas others do not. To say the natural way is nothing more than marketing is folly in my view

I meant very specifically for 5-MeO-DMT, in the context of the amounts that are found in the data and the lack of traditional use of smoking toad venom, just in this context i think it is marketing to people who want to have a traditional experience.

In the other examples you mentioned I wholeheartedly agree that this is something that is very different.

 

[AstralRoots]

I meant very specifically for 5-MeO-DMT, in the context of the amounts that are found in the data and the lack of traditional use of smoking toad venom, just in this context i think it is marketing to people who want to have a traditional experience.

In the other examples you mentioned I wholeheartedly agree that this is something that is very different.

Respect. May go with straight 5 sometime though I am having reactivations nightly as it is. I am loosely anticipating a ganja session which may or may not moon me. Maybe in a week.

 

[AstralRoots]

Last night I awoke in tears with connection the the medicine. Today I am presented old memories of extreme pain which occured during my childhood. I am leaning on the supportive relationships in my life, re considering those that aren't supportive, and cultivating faith in the overall healing process I am in. It's a challenge to accept that one's unhealed cPTSD has compromised one's life to a great extent. Similarly it's a gift to be aware and to know change isn't only possible it's inevitable.

I continue to discern and anticipate working with medicine in the future. Due to the immensity of the experience I had i am very reluctant to consume just about anything even in small dosages. At the same time I know I need to re enter the unconscious to continue the healing process.

 

[Varallo]

There is no need to rush things, it seems like you are doing the work right now and adding more trips on top of your already fragile state might be to much. Of course this is for you to decide but take it from someone who has been through some difficult integrations, it’s not always a good idea to unground yourself when you’re still floating.

Anyway all the best with your journey, much love.

 

[AstralRoots]

There is no need to rush things, it seems like you are doing the work right now and adding more trips on top of your already fragile state might be to much. Of course this is for you to decide but take it from someone who has been through some difficult integrations, it’s not always a good idea to unground yourself when you’re still floating.

Anyway all the best with your journey, much love.

Ugh. Rough integration no doubt.

Really appreciate all the support here.

Much