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first time

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powermarton

Rising Star
First nn dmt trip.

First of all i am a very experienced user of entheogens with regular practice for ten years. So [and i know i should have known better] i decided to go deep early. for the most pronounced experience i went for 130 mg innsuffated of pure nn dmt. Because 80x salvia trip[s were the norm i was saying hey i can handle this. Noooooooooooooooooooo.I struggle with the imagrey but essentilly reality and people were refining the experince of life over eons intill we were alive and all are happyness sadness hunger rage joy and pain and a everything was expressesd in one word.Then we were nothing either sobbing at non exsistance or wailing at the future pain of knowing what exsistance meant. This has shaken me to the core of my previously percieved core.
I know i does not make much sense but i feel like iwas the source code of exsistance being introduced to conciousness and being present at the birth of ego and all the horrors i may/has
given exsistance .
Thanks for reading my ramble.
 
Interesting that you chose insufflation as your initial R.O.A. Was this fumarate, or freebase? The latter has a particularly bad nasal burn... (But perhaps if you've snorted 2C-B, for example, you won't have given this a second thought.)
 
It was freebase i believe . It seemed the easiest way to control the exact dose without wastage or dropping it. Also research suggested that the trip would be about an hour .In hindsight 6 mins would have been more than enough. With regard to nasal discomfort i did not really care about that as i knew it would be overtaken shortly by more pressing feelings.
 
Did you just feel the horrors of existence or did you also see the beauty that infinite consciousness can create? My first DMT trip was very similar in that I merged with the universe. Do you think there is a way out of the cycle that you experienced?
 
No way out and a sense that im still not out. Also an inevitable feeling that next time i do dmt i will be made fully aware of it. Pretty scared actually. w as hoping for some loving insight or something. Despite all the fear there is a nagging felling that this fear is just my ego clinging on by the fingernails. Its like i had ego death only for it to be reborn with more to fear.
 
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