meinsideme
Rising Star
- Merits
- 182
Hello,
Yesterday I had the opportunity to finally experience the spice and I would like to share my experiences and get some feedback from others to help me further understand what happened.
Let me preface that I am 25 years old and both my parents have been practicing yoga for the past 40 years, so to some degree, I have been raised with a certain openness to the many possible realms of existence and states of mind. Furthermore, I had an amazing an unexpected Reiki experience a few summers ago in which my third eye was opened up energetically by another person and for an hour or so I sat at the bottom of the bluest ocean and had the craziest non drug induced 3rd eye trip of my life...
So... when I finally got a chance to try it, i took one hit with ganja, counted to 15 and closed my eyes and began to focus on my third eye. Almost instantly after exhaling the sounds around me turned into a low frequency oscillating pitch with a pulsing bass frequency and I felt myself being 'landed on' by what I perceived as a ship. I felt my body ascending into an energetic light and my body felt momentarily ecstatic as I tried to accept what was happening and move past my fear. At this stage of relaxation I found myself transporting into what I would describe as a biomechanical ship with two separate slug or "alien" like beings standing above me as I floated on a board of light. Closer to me was a feminine presence and looming behind was a more ominous masculine presence. For whatever reason it was very personal and felt almost like I was being molested or tricked. Like they wanted me to give something up and it was a very strange feeling, as if I was a guinea pig. The feminine presence took notice of my discomfort and touched me in the craziest way. At first she curiously touched my face, almost with energetic tentacles or something like a young curious girl admiring something without meaning to. In the instant that she looked at my face and touched me, I momentarily was HER staring at myself. She then felt my energies getting weirded out and as if taking a gauge of my willingness, gave me a shot of pure flying bliss.
For an instant, I felt what she could give me to me if I wanted it. It was like being offered a 'hit" of the divine light. In this instance, my internal voice went away and i was completely placid and one. Then thoughts came back in my mind, identity and ego, and I knew what she needed in exchange to go further. All she needed was my permission and intention for me to let go of my identity, voice and sense of self and I would be transported. At this stage my ego reacted strongly. I was afraid that if I gave this up I might not get it back and this absolutely terrified me. Further more I had this strange feeling of dark intention and it was like they were envious of something I had, or at least this is what I projected on these beings. I laughed at them and said in my mind "ha i know what you want and i'm not ready to give it to you" the laugh was a defensive laugh and came out of a certain arrogance. The sound of my own laughter allowed me to start to bring myself back.
The moment I intended to come back, they backed off with indifference and slowly i was disconnected and the ship let me down and hovered back off through my third eye. At first I was a bit terrified. I had heard of encounters like this, but there was this distinct feeling of being almost molested or tricked. It wasn't all bad, but something about it caused me to pull away and get very defensive. After spending some time thinking about it, I began to wonder if they really had bad intentions at all. Perhaps they were egoless creatures that happened to see I was knocking at the gate. They came to see who was at the door and I was willing to a certain degree so let allowed me to get a little further. My ego wanted to be gently caressed and loved and welcomed into the next gate, but that was not the case, they were not into playing games and caressing my ego gently... it was a matter of "are you willing to let go and come or not?". Part of me feels that had I surrendered to her "shot" of white light, let them finish whatever they were doing to me on that energetic operating table, and completely surrendered my "self", I would have gone through the next gate of ecstatic energy and knowing. Or perhaps I would have lost my "sense of self" for good and might not be able to live the life I want to life on this plane.
Has anyone had experience with creatures or entities that have ill will or are malicious? Or perhaps is this our minds way of giving us the hard and real truth about ourself, challenging us to ask the right questions through scary manifestations of creatures? Are there many different energetic entities traveling in the fourth dimension acting as "gate keepers" or is this a greater creation of my mind fighting against itself?
I would have loved to kill my ego and let go and give it all up to get lost in the energy she was offering me, but it just came from such a scary place. I have heard about people interacting with other entities but I didn't expect it to feel so invasive and personal. Ultimately I came to the belief that I only projected this negative energy on them because my ego wanted to be loved and wooed into giving itself up, but that in itself would only feed it...the fact that they left with indifference shows that they really weren't so bad after all...You follow me?
Sorry for the long rant, but I just wanted to share my thoughts and experience. Side note, after talking about this all day with a close friend who had also never tried the spice, he chose to partake later that night and was beamed up on his first time as well...however instead of being put into a room with two creatures probing him, he simply faced his fear and swam next to "giant creatures" through the sea of the universe and came back extremely elated and happy.
How much do preconceived notions of our "breakthrough" actually effect our experience of it? ahh so many questions. Thanks for reading and please share with me any thoughts this might inspire. Thanks and One Love
-meinsideme
Yesterday I had the opportunity to finally experience the spice and I would like to share my experiences and get some feedback from others to help me further understand what happened.
Let me preface that I am 25 years old and both my parents have been practicing yoga for the past 40 years, so to some degree, I have been raised with a certain openness to the many possible realms of existence and states of mind. Furthermore, I had an amazing an unexpected Reiki experience a few summers ago in which my third eye was opened up energetically by another person and for an hour or so I sat at the bottom of the bluest ocean and had the craziest non drug induced 3rd eye trip of my life...
So... when I finally got a chance to try it, i took one hit with ganja, counted to 15 and closed my eyes and began to focus on my third eye. Almost instantly after exhaling the sounds around me turned into a low frequency oscillating pitch with a pulsing bass frequency and I felt myself being 'landed on' by what I perceived as a ship. I felt my body ascending into an energetic light and my body felt momentarily ecstatic as I tried to accept what was happening and move past my fear. At this stage of relaxation I found myself transporting into what I would describe as a biomechanical ship with two separate slug or "alien" like beings standing above me as I floated on a board of light. Closer to me was a feminine presence and looming behind was a more ominous masculine presence. For whatever reason it was very personal and felt almost like I was being molested or tricked. Like they wanted me to give something up and it was a very strange feeling, as if I was a guinea pig. The feminine presence took notice of my discomfort and touched me in the craziest way. At first she curiously touched my face, almost with energetic tentacles or something like a young curious girl admiring something without meaning to. In the instant that she looked at my face and touched me, I momentarily was HER staring at myself. She then felt my energies getting weirded out and as if taking a gauge of my willingness, gave me a shot of pure flying bliss.
For an instant, I felt what she could give me to me if I wanted it. It was like being offered a 'hit" of the divine light. In this instance, my internal voice went away and i was completely placid and one. Then thoughts came back in my mind, identity and ego, and I knew what she needed in exchange to go further. All she needed was my permission and intention for me to let go of my identity, voice and sense of self and I would be transported. At this stage my ego reacted strongly. I was afraid that if I gave this up I might not get it back and this absolutely terrified me. Further more I had this strange feeling of dark intention and it was like they were envious of something I had, or at least this is what I projected on these beings. I laughed at them and said in my mind "ha i know what you want and i'm not ready to give it to you" the laugh was a defensive laugh and came out of a certain arrogance. The sound of my own laughter allowed me to start to bring myself back.
The moment I intended to come back, they backed off with indifference and slowly i was disconnected and the ship let me down and hovered back off through my third eye. At first I was a bit terrified. I had heard of encounters like this, but there was this distinct feeling of being almost molested or tricked. It wasn't all bad, but something about it caused me to pull away and get very defensive. After spending some time thinking about it, I began to wonder if they really had bad intentions at all. Perhaps they were egoless creatures that happened to see I was knocking at the gate. They came to see who was at the door and I was willing to a certain degree so let allowed me to get a little further. My ego wanted to be gently caressed and loved and welcomed into the next gate, but that was not the case, they were not into playing games and caressing my ego gently... it was a matter of "are you willing to let go and come or not?". Part of me feels that had I surrendered to her "shot" of white light, let them finish whatever they were doing to me on that energetic operating table, and completely surrendered my "self", I would have gone through the next gate of ecstatic energy and knowing. Or perhaps I would have lost my "sense of self" for good and might not be able to live the life I want to life on this plane.
Has anyone had experience with creatures or entities that have ill will or are malicious? Or perhaps is this our minds way of giving us the hard and real truth about ourself, challenging us to ask the right questions through scary manifestations of creatures? Are there many different energetic entities traveling in the fourth dimension acting as "gate keepers" or is this a greater creation of my mind fighting against itself?
I would have loved to kill my ego and let go and give it all up to get lost in the energy she was offering me, but it just came from such a scary place. I have heard about people interacting with other entities but I didn't expect it to feel so invasive and personal. Ultimately I came to the belief that I only projected this negative energy on them because my ego wanted to be loved and wooed into giving itself up, but that in itself would only feed it...the fact that they left with indifference shows that they really weren't so bad after all...You follow me?
Sorry for the long rant, but I just wanted to share my thoughts and experience. Side note, after talking about this all day with a close friend who had also never tried the spice, he chose to partake later that night and was beamed up on his first time as well...however instead of being put into a room with two creatures probing him, he simply faced his fear and swam next to "giant creatures" through the sea of the universe and came back extremely elated and happy.
How much do preconceived notions of our "breakthrough" actually effect our experience of it? ahh so many questions. Thanks for reading and please share with me any thoughts this might inspire. Thanks and One Love
-meinsideme
