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matthias10000

Rising Star
Hi, I have just turned eightteen (31/12/1998) and would like to introduce myself here in this wonderful and peaceful ´haven` of the internet (like in LOTR with Rivendell). The reason why I would like to take DMT is because my psychiatrist put me on an MAOI for social anxiety (after I begged him). Social inhibitions quickly fell away, but after a while it looked (and this is just a theory) that the MAOI (Nardil) also inhibited the breakdown of my endogenous DMT in my body. A lot of traumas/memories from when I was a little child broke out of the deep state of adult amnesia again, at night when I was on my bike everything seemed to go in slowmotion and I had enormous trouble orientating myself to go back home again and I had to ask tons of people, eventually I was ´betrayed` by my own parents who found that I behaved ´´weird (= not conforming to society´s rules, they both work for that abstract machine by the way, The European Union). When the two guys from the ambulance came to get me, I weirdly enough knew ancient fighting skills and showed them what I could. But I knew that society as a machine was so big that I couldn´t do anything about it, even with my ´new``fighting skills so I surrendered to them. In the hospital I fought again and more than 10 people had to restrain me, while I screamed out that I had found the ´knowledge`. They put me in the Jesus position on a bed (so that my arms and legs couldn´t move and even took my pants of), they attached me with wires into my arm to see if there was ´´maybe something going on with his vital signals`, the hospital staff even took my glasses off (I have minus 8) and closed the drapes around my bed because ´other patients` were scared. I could hear their voices, but I couldn´t see anything. I really thought that I was going to die, but first become a coma patient who sat for 40 years in his mind before ´they` deciced to pull the plug out. I can tell the rest of the story (it has really happened to me) if you´re interested and tell me.

Link to a ´piece of knowledge´ (2 in fact): http://www.albany.edu/news/pdf_files/Gripstrength.pdf
link.springer.com

Hand Grip Strength and Self-Perceptions of Physical Attractiveness and Psychological Well-Being - Evolutionary Psychological Science

This study investigated the link between handgrip strength and self-rated physical attractiveness, sexual history, and social characteristics in 145 male university students. Handgrip strength correlated with both height and weight, as well as self-perceived happiness, health, social confidence...
link.springer.com link.springer.com
 
Hi there,

A bit of an unsettling post, you're 18 and you're vulnerable, working with a psychiatrist, you describe having problems that are a bit unlike typical maoi. I hope you understand that people here are not keen in advising a strong psychedelic for such occasions, as it could go anywhere and emphasis here is harm reduction.
I think you are in the process of whatever, and I have my reservations about throwing dmt in the mix. Maybe under guidance of confident and experienced people who are well informed about your situation.

Take care and maybe stall your plans for dmt until you get out of the treatment phase?
 
I.can't bury that memory no matter how hard I try, I will need to go deep inside myself with DMT to find the answers which I have been searching my whole life for. Another interesting study: building alien worlds dimethyltryptamine (type these words in google scholar)
 
You should be aware of what you need. And what you need is healing and not hyperspace. You should think about Ayahuasca!
You can't and mustn't bury any memories. The goal is to take them as a projection which can teach you. To grow and to live with it. You are 18! You are just getting into what I call the Ego-Time. Unpredictable feelings are normal when 18 years old.
Psycholysis (treatment of Depression and other disorders with psychedelics) is a strong tool. And in my opinion the one which is guiding us towards future. But man you are 18.
Try to heal yourself instead of overchallenge yourself.
Mother Ayahuasca is a deeper and more caring way to heal. Think about it.
If you need some more Information about it....or some reviews and personal opinions don't be ashamed to ask mate. Do you live in europe?
Love and Peace for you
Cheers
 
Jees said:
Hi there,

A bit of an unsettling post, you're 18 and you're vulnerable, working with a psychiatrist, you describe having problems that are a bit unlike typical maoi. I hope you understand that people here are not keen in advising a strong psychedelic for such occasions, as it could go anywhere and emphasis here is harm reduction.
I think you are in the process of whatever, and I have my reservations about throwing dmt in the mix. Maybe under guidance of confident and experienced people who are well informed about your situation.

Take care and maybe stall your plans for dmt until you get out of the treatment phase?
Click to expand...

I must agree with Jees here. It sounds like you have a lot on your plate at the moment and partaking in one of the most powerful psychedelics won't be some be-all and end-all for your situation. Most people who partake are in fact, left with twice as many questions as answers. We can't tell you what to do, but we can advise on what we know, and what we know is that great caution must be taken when utilizing these substances. Can it be healing and helpful? Absolutely! Can it destroy someone in an already fragile state? Absolutely! Be mindful of these things should you choose to continue down this path.

At any rate, welcome to the Nexus! Be safe!

P.S.

If you are talking about the "Building Alien Worlds" published by Andrew Gallimore, he is actually a well respected member of the Nexus and has spoken at the Breaking Convention:



 
Thanks everyone for taking the time to answer this thread.
Maybe I might try ayahuasca first, to prepare me for hyperspace...
But since my bad experience I just make like these ´weird` predictions in my head
that for example France will drop out the EU with Front National winning the elections and then the same fate will happen to Germany with Alternative für Deutschland, I also expect that there will be extreme chaos/revolution in Brussels.
Am I ´weird` for thinking such stuff or is it just society that implanted us with fixed ideas about what is ´weird` and we as little, fast-learning babys have rapidly implemented these ideas in our brain and these ´preconceived notions` form ´our` consciousness?

BTW I´m a big believer in nihilism (Nietschze) and I think that all the chaos that is yet to come on this planet will destroy us or make us stronger.

I´m also a big believer that we still build ´our` societies around millions-year old ´patterns` that helped us to survive, I will attach a study (again) to clarify all this mumbo-jumbo that is spouting out of my mouth.

PHILOSOPHICAL QUESTION: What if everyone would become more physically attractive? (Don´t tell me that atttractivenes isn´t measurable and is only a matter of culture because science begins to find out what are the determinants of attractiveness)

LINK CAROTENOIDS:Carotenoids not sunbeds make you more attractive
LINK FLUCTUATING ASYMMETRY: http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/0162309594900183
LINK HGS CORRELATES WITH WOMENS PERCEPTION OF MENS DANCING ABILITY: https://www.researchgate.net/profil...ng_ability/links/0fcfd4fb0d37a10da8000000.pdf
 
Well your toughts are not stupid at all. But let me tell you semothing...No matter what is going to happen is exactly what needs to happen. For example the AFD in germany. Yeah let these folks get some spots around in parliament. So what ? People are going to see what's happening. The same with France and Brussels. For me it was 1 year of desillusional fucking up my mind because of this fucked up world. But hey....the System has to crash in order to build one with one collective connected consciousness! The times will come. We are at the edge of a revolution. Yes we also are on the edge of WWIII but fuck it man ! You can't change the mind of the leading Elite. They will keep going. Because they are evil...and weird af.
For me it's no wonder that so many people want to leave germany. People asking why 'living there is good' blabla. But in germany the people are just so fucking stupid. Laws/rules/regulation. It's devastating.

The Nietzsche thing is cool.
As Einstein said 'i don't know which weapons will win WW3, but in WW4 they will fight with sticks and stones'
And that's pretty much it. Yes...If there is going to be war...it's going to destroy a lot...big time...but that's nothing new. I mean look how many children are bombed every day by americans...but there is no money for the homeless.
The world we live in is fucked. But that's no reason to fuck yourself up...because that ain't going to help!

I think you wanted to ask what will happen if everyone became more physically attracted? Right ?
 
My question was what would happen if we would minimize differences between people as much as possible? There are certain scientific studies that explain the fundaments of physical attractiveness, physical strength, social dominance (= being the most ´looked-at`,´influential` person in your social group. If these differences were as small as possible and every person on this planet would be made aware that his personality/looks/life situation was just a ´difficult science` over which he didn´t have any ´knowledge` (but now does), we could finally get our ´primitive` minds to evolve into ´newer` minds.



EXAMPLE WITH A STUDY : https://www.researchgate.net/profil...aggression/links/53e937670cf2fb1b9b66a1b5.pdf

In this study, it is explained that the testosterone-cortisol ratio (how much of the hormone testosterone you got in comparison to the hormone cortisol), the more your ´brainwaves/brainfrequency/call it however you want` look the same as those we see in ´cold-blooded` reptiles. Your brain basically goes into an evolutionary ´old mode`. Scientists have found that the testosterone-cortisolratio is very high in psychopaths and ´´weirdly` enough it was found that the higher your ´T-C-ratio` as a chief executive, the more ´subordinates` you have under you = the higher you were in the ´so-called` ´hierarchy`.

This is the study from Harvard where you can read this on your own: https://dash.harvard.edu/bitstream/handle/1/22509302/Sherman_Lerner_Testosterone_Cortisol.pdf

Testosterone-cortisolratio is for over 75% genetically determined, but I´m going to change it by taking a mix of DHEA+Exemestane (or maybe pay the price of sterility by taking pure, old testosterone) we will see how my perception of the world will change. I´m also training my HGS (Hand Grip Strength) because you´re more attractive for the ladies: READ HERE: http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0191886909001627 (Men’s physical strength is associated with women’s perceptions of their dancing ability)
 
You sound like a very smart guy for your age but my advice would be to slow down. Even ayahuasca can be a strong tool and as tools go, they can both help and hurt.

I have neither the training or enough information to make a prognosis but it does sound like you have some mental issues to work through. My advice is to work through as much of it as you can without self medicating. When you feel like you have exhausted all options within traditional medicine and still feel that there is something missing or just a desire to explore then have at it. Just be careful. There is a lot (SHIT TONS) of misinformation, pseudo-science, and pseudo-spirituality in the world and just as much on the net.

And if you're going to explore psychedelics, start with something mild like a gram or two of psilocybe mushrooms. Slowly climb the rungs of the ladder until you reach DMT or ayahuasca. I have seen way too many people take something they weren't ready for and it's not pretty, especially in places where you can be put in a cell with violent criminals for it.
 
Okay will do that and I am indeed, if I may brag, pretty smart. I can speak 4 languages and have studied Latin and Greek, this bragging was part of my therapy to become better, thank you very much for reading this :thumb_up:
 
Good luck Matthias. Hope you manage to heal your demons. Interesting stuff about the hand grip strength. Mine is pretty powerful from all the mastubation....
 
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