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Help! I Think I May Have Really Messed Up...

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Nathanial.Dread

Nathanial.Dread

Esteemed member
On Sunday, I took 1.5 grams of pretty potent mushrooms, in addition to some lemon juice, in a naive attempt to kick the trip into high gear. It was a stupid, stupid trip, the weather was bad, I didn't prepare for it, and was in kind of a bad mood going into it. The experience itself was overwhelming, with all the hallmarks of a powerful trip: everything was archetypal journeys, trees started talking to me, and I felt like I was walking on a razors edge the whole time.

Now, about a day later, I'm really afraid that I may have done real damage to my brain. Prior to the trip, I'd been mostly happy (that morning just happened to be a bad one), however, for the last two mornings, I have woken up with severe depression and general feelings of hopelessness. Those a pretty quickly replaced by wild mood-swings (one moment I'm trapped in a cycle of thoughts about how bleak the future is, the next, I'm having euphoric revelations about my relationship with God).

On top of all this, I feel weirdly derealized, kind of like I'm living in a dream. I see things and I can't help but wonder if they are just hallucinations and if I haven't managed to trigger some kind of underlying DP/DR disorder or psychosis.

I wish I hadn't tripped and just want to be normal again. Has anyone gone through things like this? Can I expect it to go away in a few days? A few weeks? It's making going to class and fulfilling obligations very difficult.
 
You took 1.5 Grams of dried shrooms (cubensis ?) with no other substances or meds in your system ?

Anyhow, I wouldn't worry too much since it's less than 24 hours and some metabolites may still be in your system. Just stay calm and don't stress yourself. Wait a few days I would say and stay away from any psychotropics, even caffeine :)

How often did you trip before ?

EDIT: Okay, now I know what the lime is supposed to do..
 
Potent mushroom trips can be very unsettling. I've been where you are - it will pass. Aim yourself in a positive direction... excercise, good diet, genuine and loving social interaction. Lemon-tekking can make things crazy. I've broken through to a white void on lemony good shrooms - mose intense shroom trip of my life.

Use those ideas that are surfacing (both beautiful and scary) to improve your outlook over all. I find that shrooms bring whatever they damn well please up from my psyche - usually something I needed to address anyways. That medicinal aspect can be fairly jolting from time to time.

Long story short.... this too shall pass. You are loved.

Peace and Blessings

PT
 
It will very likely dissipate over a few days, or maybe weeks. It always has for me and anyone I know, but if it does persist, go to see a doctor and explain the situation - I know that is not an easy step, but take comfort that there are resources out there to help you. Do you have anyone in your life you can talk to about this? Don't be shy about it! Mostly you need to be patient (easier said than done I know!), go about your business, fulfil your obligations and eat well and exercise, trusting that your body will sort itself out. Do things you enjoy and try not to spend too much time alone wallowing, as much as you may think you need it.

If in the unlikely event it should persist or worsen, do seek professional help.

Good luck and keep us posted,

JBArk

PS - as stated above, stay away from psycho-actives and depressants, including and especially cannabis.
 
I almost did the same thing last weekend. I had planned to take a trip with some mushrooms a la lemon tek. I didn't prepare properly and I was in a bad mood when the time came, so I opted out. I'm glad I did after reading this thread.

It'll pass eventually. Like everyone says just try to ground yourself in some activities, eat right, maybe talk to a trusted friend about it. You'll feel right as rain in no time 😉
 
You should be fine :)

It will wear off just take it easy for a bit and don't indulge again till you feel back to your old self.

Try to stay focused on the things that matter. I have done similar with spice and I know the persisting feeling of hopelessness (like nothing matters or is connected). I took it as a lesson to treat these substances with a bit more respect (I am not implying that you don't) I ended up doing some more spice when It felt right and made peace having almost the same experience the second time but with no fear. Btw I am experienced with spice and shrooms and this was not on my first time or even a proper breakthrough.

1.5 grams of shrooms won't break you, however feeling broken and not addressing it can lead to problems.

It is all in your mind and you have the power to heal yourself. This experience may turn out to be a blessing once you have made it through the rough and can see clearly again.

Life is not all fun and games and those little mushrooms can put you in your place if you are not ready for it. After my experience I asked myself why I did it and the only real answer was to see what was going to happen, what happened was it kicked my arse. Now I only take psychedelics when I hear them calling and it feels like the right thing to do I trust my instinct which by the sound of it you did not.

As I said take it as a lesson and move on you will be fine.

Blessings and respect
 
Damage to the brain? No way. A few weeks ago i did some mushies and cannabis and had some dreadful depressing feelings afterwards. I remember from the trip that i had simply isolated myself from people. I decided to work at this and just converse with people more. I felt better within 2 days.
 
One thing I would like to add, seems that you respond pretty heavy to Psychedelics which might be a indicator for low serotonine levels to begin with.

This is something I discovered when a friend of mine who is deeply depressed and takes Methylphenidate (80-120mg die) responded heavy on 3-5 mg 2c-e.

I couldn't explain this to myself as he even did 40 mg MPH just before this. The depression and the raise in Dopamine levels are indicators for pretty low serotonine levels. Means when catecholamines (Noradrenaline/Dopamine/Epinephrine) are hightened a prolonged period of time, the serotonine levels sink. This is what you see on Methheads, Speedfreaks,... When there is low serotonine and the receptors are not jet downregulated, potency of 5-HT Agonists rises.

I tell you this so you don't worry about the depressive symptoms in terms of actual depression and instead maybe see it as a nutritional deficiencie which may develop into one some day.

Peace 😉
 
That makes sense to me in light that i have seen Benzyme mention DMT competes with serotonin for receptor binding.

!Xabbu said:
One thing I would like to add, seems that you respond pretty heavy to Psychedelics which might be a indicator for low serotonine levels to begin with.
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^
For the above would go for eggs and bananas as a source for 5HT and amino acids. Personally i like to take vitamin supplements. Vitamin B6 is a good co-enzym for serotonin production but you need the other vitamins for a healthy metabolism AFAIK.
 
One thing I would like to add, seems that you respond pretty heavy to Psychedelics which might be a indicator for low serotonine levels to begin with.

This is something I discovered when a friend of mine who is deeply depressed and takes Methylphenidate (80-120mg die) responded heavy on 3-5 mg 2c-e.

I couldn't explain this to myself as he even did 40 mg MPH just before this. The depression and the raise in Dopamine levels are indicators for pretty low serotonine levels. Means when catecholamines (Noradrenaline/Dopamine/Epinephrine) are hightened a prolonged period of time, the serotonine levels sink. This is what you see on Methheads, Speedfreaks,... When there is low serotonine and the receptors are not jet downregulated, potency of 5-HT Agonists rises.

I tell you this so you don't worry about the depressive symptoms in terms of actual depression and instead maybe see it as a nutritional deficiencie which may develop into one some day.
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I don't think that you can state this based on that one experience.
 
expandaneum said:
I don't think that you can state this based on that one experience.
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You are right, this is nont meant as a diagnosis, more of a suggestion.

!Xabbu said:
When there is low serotonine and the receptors are not jet downregulated, potency of 5-HT Agonists rises.
Click to expand...
Have to take that downregulation thing back as it is wrong.. Downregulation happens when there is an ssri blocking neurons which hightens serotonine (as with prozac)
 
Nathanial.Dread said:
Now, about a day later, I'm really afraid that I may have done real damage to my brain. Prior to the trip, I'd been mostly happy (that morning just happened to be a bad one), however, for the last two mornings, I have woken up with severe depression and general feelings of hopelessness. Those a pretty quickly replaced by wild mood-swings (one moment I'm trapped in a cycle of thoughts about how bleak the future is, the next, I'm having euphoric revelations about my relationship with God).
Click to expand...


I hate to sound like the superstitious old man here but it is my opinion that you might be having a problem with a negative entity. If I were you in your situation(and I feel like I have been in your situation).. I would eat a bit of either Ayahuasca or san pedro and have myself a good old fashioned purge session sometime in the near future to hopefully get rid of most or maybe even all the negative energy that likes to feed on and cultivate bad vibrations....

I would steer clear of mushrooms on their own for a while, until you feel like this thing is cleared up.

Also-You might want to take a integration break before ingesting any more psychedelic materials..
 
You didn't damage your brain...you just had a rough trip.. no worries. A great trip can give you a lasting after-glow, and a rough one can do a bit of the opposite. After a while virtually everyone goes through that eventually. It will pass and you will feel back to normal very soon.

Make sure to eat well, exercise, do yoga, meditate, spend time in nature/the sun, etc...Writing also has helped me a lot in the past.
 
Hey Nathaniel.Dread.

Just curious, and you don't need to answer this if it's personal, but do you have any underlying issues or repressed feelings that need dealing with?

I only ask because 7 years ago I indulged in a mild solo trip on LSD, I did it without much reason or forethought, and I promptly got my own unconscious psyche thrown back in my face. I fell asleep before effects kicked in, woke up confused and mildly tripping and eventually slept it off until the next day. Went to a friends the following night for a few beers and to hang and then when I got home had my first ever panic attack. I couldn't sleep that night and experienced acute anxiety for the next day after that until I could get hold of some anti-anxiety meds to calm myself down and get a good nights sleep.

Within the next week unresolved grief about my fathers passing away 4 years before hit me like a tonne of bricks and much soul searching, integrating and dealing with tough emotions ensued. It took a good while to really sort this out, the more repressed the emotions, the heavier the integration time... The hardest thing I have gone through but also the most pivotal moment of my life that has made me a much better person for it.

This might not relate to you at all but I thought it worth throwing out there. All it took for me was the recipe of buried painful emotions, a mild dose of LSD and an admittedly blase and silly lack of respect for the power of psychedelics (even at modest doses) to hand me my problems unavoidably on a plate in front of my face.

Time will heal my friend, as well as the advice to eat healthy, exercise, rest and take care of obligations. I'd agree, steer clear of any psychoactives until you feel like you have reached some kind of equilibrium also. Peace to you on your journey Nathaniel.Dread.
 
Nathanial.Dread said:
On top of all this, I feel weirdly derealized, kind of like I'm living in a dream. I see things and I can't help but wonder if they are just hallucinations and if I haven't managed to trigger some kind of underlying DP/DR disorder or psychosis.

I wish I hadn't tripped and just want to be normal again. Has anyone gone through things like this? Can I expect it to go away in a few days? A few weeks? It's making going to class and fulfilling obligations very difficult.
Click to expand...

Mushrooms, they f'you up real good. Ask Terance McKenna :) And now you know. But there will be always ppl who will tell you: Bla bla mushrooms, the real deal. Nature, bla. Bad trip, no way man!

Now that are in this state and know, think about TMK and how he kept advertising them after he experienced the same. :thumb_dow

Remember: Ann Shulgin doesn't like Ayahuasca. Which I think is the key to your lesson. One's poison is the other's pleasure.

On the other hand:

www.plosone.org

Psychedelics and Mental Health: A Population Study

Background The classical serotonergic psychedelics LSD, psilocybin, mescaline are not known to cause brain damage and are regarded as non-addictive. Clinical studies do not suggest that psychedelics cause long-term mental health problems. Psychedelics have been used in the Americas for thousands...
www.plosone.org www.plosone.org

The classical serotonergic psychedelics LSD, psilocybin, mescaline are not known to cause brain damage and are regarded as non-addictive.
Click to expand...

Get well soon! I know you will.
 
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