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Hope this can help anyone who feels scared.

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U gO

Rising Star
Hi everybody!
i would like to share with all of you an experience, and how i lived with it, hoping that this thread can help anybody who have or had similar feelings.

i read lot of things about spice, hyperspace and this experiences that lot of us have done and heard about some peoples that became scared to have a breakthrough and while reading i had time to think about my bad experience and meditate on what could be happened and draw my path to change my mind.

sorry for bad english or some uncomprensible sentences but my grammar still have to be improved and i ask everybody who see some errors to share corrections :)

I'll start to describe you the experience....
Dark room, sofas and armchair, 4 friends.
a candle on the low table in the middle of the room quite far from any of us
wood pellets burner that gives to the room an orangey glow light,

Excited because that was the second time i had proper changa instead of smoking a joint of harmalas and then the bowl of enchanted leaves and the time before we don't have any breakthrough because we want to try with low dose and then increase it but due to a dinner made with fried potato and carbonara pasta followed by double puking of my friends and uncomfy feelings in the stomach we decided to stop at a sub breakthrough dose.

and i really want to breakthrough again because the last time i achieved it i felt like i was sharing informations with my this purple entity that i felt being my dead grandpa whos saying me that i'm on the right path and to don't leav it.
i enjoied that much that i came out from the trip listening my voice saying thanks thanks thanks thanks with no control over it until shapes of thing start to be less fractally.

I've already had breaktrhough experiences so i know what expect me more or less i just would liked to discover more of that.

A bit worried about harmalas because i extracted it few days before and i know that them still have inside some seeds impurities as they didn't came out perfectly light tan as in the extraction TEK was described but tan with some little brown spots in it as the coffe filter that i can found had some little holes in them.
we talked about it and about that almost no sodium carbonate or any extracting reagent caould be in the harmalas as i rinsed it with distilled water and after a bit mine and all of us "psychedelics enjoyers" desire to try it overcame the goodsense of do it in the right way so at unanimity we decided to heat up the spice, harmalas and the herbs togheter in a warm water bath.

I think this contributed to how the trip came so an advice for anyone who extract alkaloids himself is: BE SURE THAT WHAT YOUR GOING TO USE IS AT LEAST A 9 OVER 10 CLEAN NOT JUST FOR PHYSICAL HEALTH ISSUES BUT PSYCHICAL TOO

the mix was Caapi, Skullcap, Blue lotus,Pink lotus,Damiana and passiflora.
1 g of herbs,1 g of spice, 1 g of harmalas.

we talked about the difference between enchanted leaves and changa, about the experiences that we read and make the past times with joint/spice on the subject and about that while travelling we just have to let us leave and be strong and enjoy what we gonna see...as always

so i charged the first bowl of 60 mg of changa expecting a 20 mg spice trip but i don't know why(i suppose i burned most of the spice due to keeping the torch near the bowl) i felt almost no effects, just a feeling of dizziness in the body, a light change in the light but definitely not what i expected from it... so i shared my feelings with others and one by one the wanted to try the same dose just to start low with. so they smoalked it while me administering and using the torch to don't burn the spice with the lighter but just to ignite the changa and let the airflow do the rest. in facts all of my friends experienced a good travel... we talked about it and we decided to put a bit more changa to bring the experience to another level so i asked my friend to lightmy bowl carefully to dun burn it up too fast.
i charged a 85mg bowl and smoalked it and i definitely had a strong trip, slow comeup starting witha cartoon like change in things edges followed by a fractal evolution of that edges and then i was in hyperspace... i experienced bunches of fractals dimensions with strange sounds and moving entities around me. i felt my body losing any sense of being and i start to be pure conscience like one of that entities and i really enjoyed it...
i start thinking about the reverse tolerance of rue alks that mean that if you were MAO inibited you need less of the spice for achieve the same effects
i felt that so real and i don't know why i start having thoughs about my leftover body if i was sitted or i'm standing and suddenly i start to thinking what does "sit" means and what "stand" means? where am i? where are my arms? what i've done? i get some dirty stuff that fried my brain...
And then i started to listen this voice that "asking" me why did you worry about it? you've done it, why do you worry? why do you worry? you already done it just let u carry out
is the typical story about the hippy that get psychedelics and never come back i thought, then i started thinking that something as wonderful as what i just smoalked can be so attractive for me that i could lost interest in everything else im doing; in life itself mainly and decide to don't came back even if i want.
So i started having bad thinking about the spice and that i love my friends and my life and i don't want that them experiences the same because i was frightened that them can lose interest in their lives.
(Unless after the evening everybody thanks me for the experiences they have, my good friend said me he had some kind of illumination about we are all one thing(love) in different expressions and another said me that he was connected with everything has life in it and that he can could saw even bacterias living everywere and the life flowing in every of us around him)

And then the comedown started, i started to see the candle(that was not proper a candle anymore but more a light portal to reality in shapes) and i tried to explain what i felt but just uncomprensibles sounds came out from my mouth and while i'm trying to get the control of my body back another friend started to smoalk so i prefered to shut and i started to suppress what i though in the trip thinking that it was "Just a trip" (HERE I THINK THERE WAS THE MISTAKE)
after some wave feelings of effect of full body spasms and uncontrollable laughs i started to make a welcome back weed joint for everybody and thinking about my experience unless i though that we all are mature persons and any of us can think about our own life in the way he prefere.

I lived with this sense of prisoned mind and mental uncomfort thinking about what i'm doing was wrong until i thought that in that state of mind i'm not an help for anyone of the peoples around me so we started an ecovillage project that bring me some thoughts about that if i want to keep extracting spice for me and for people(Friends) who i really care i have to do it "ecofriendly" because is not compatible "making" something that can open our mind that much about the reals values of the life if for doing it i'm polluting the environment by throwing in the wc the basic soup or just put people aroundme in risks like breathing NPS fumes around the house as i 've done the last extraction i what i was protected with mask and goggles and gloves and others saing me:" heeey there is smell of paint in the hooooouse..."(next step will be bought a mask for everyone so they will enjoy the products of the extraction without any harm for our health)

Anyway.... i hope that this can help someone, for sure sharing this with you helps more again...
i hope to be a strong contribute to all the community by having a more holistic thinking mind.
For sure my ego in the last year get a big hit to its grounds i became more humile and i learn from all experiences i do in my life and i try to share it with who i'm experiencing it, is a friend, a girl or whoever...

Thanks everybody i think i'll can be better and it's already your credits!

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