Well, I don't even know who I'm writing this post for or whether it will get any attention. But I just have to get it off my chest. It's my responsibility to tell other people.
I took quite a large dose of LSD two days ago and at the peak I took a walk in a park. Great decision. I was experiencing what i would call daoist existence. I was just strolling along, doing my legs what they want to do, looking at things and contemplating them. For example I discovered the fractal nature of trees (it was winter) and wondered who did that. I realized the tree probably didn't do it, because I didn't order my body to grow the way it did either (even though I would like to do that, haha). Well, I was totally at peace with myself and the world, as there were essentially no more boundaries between myself and other beings of any kind. And it was just so dignified and somehow grown up. I felt like an adult for the first time in my life. I could think straight for the first time. Culture literally poisoned my thinking, made me childish and afraid.
So, you know, I was just thinking about this and walking along and then I was at the river. It's like a little island in the city, an island of nature. And them I'm looking back at the city and it turns out, I'm able to judge it completely unprejudiced. I had been catapulted completely outside of the culture. And I realize through that that the metaphor "jungle" for "city" is perfect. Houses are literally like trees. And in the morning all the monkeys awaken in their places in the trees and they put on some funny clothes to look serious and they put on a straight face and do, you know, serious business. Like tipping on a keyboard. Or delivering parcels to other monkeys who couldn't get them themselves because they're to busy doing business. And when all the monkeys are done doing the chores and duties of the tribe they hurry back into their trees. You know, like hush hush the night is coming. Bad people are out there. And you gotta catch some sleep so you can be serious tomorrow and squeeze some movie or something in between there.
And then everyone just goes back into their cell, like in a prison, you know. Until in the morning the doors are opened and there's a meal and work and then you can do stuff with the other inmates. But, the problem with our prison, our society is, there are no guards! Goddammit. We are doing this to ourselves. Get it? I was walking down the streets then, thinking about this and that problem the world has right now. And then i finally got it. I finally knew what should be done. Just STOP. Stop what you're doing, right now. Like, literally stop driving your car, stop getting the groceries, stop watching television, stop consuming like the addict children that we are. If everybody would just do that for a moment and forget who they are in their society, their job, their name, their role. Like the whole world stopped turning. We would have time and the good sense to talk about WHAT is going on and what should be done about it. And i promise you, 90% of the worlds problems would be solved in an afternoon.
People who weren't in the state i was in, so basically everyone around me, would have said, well if I don't go to work a thousand people are waiting to take my position. I will be trampled by people desperate for doing what I'm doing. But the great secret is, that it's worthless. It won't make you happy or sane. All it can do is secure you a relatively comfortable position in society. And I mean that's the best you can hope for and apparently this is what most people are shooting for. And you gotta be thankful for it and say "thank you master" to the culture because a whole lot of people got it worse around here and you might become one of them. And to forget it all you drink your vodka and go to parties where you can literally not talk to people over the senseless drum beats and dance with the other monkeys and then you chug it down with a little television and "funny" internet memes. And that's your damn life? (Excuse the swear words, I am just done being polite about this). Just how anti social is this society?
I mean, I wanted to ask people on the streets, what the hell is this how you want to live your life? Really? I mean, superficially, all of them must say yes, we do want to live like that. Because we get up everyday and keep this machine running. We won't stop it. This steaming pile we call our culture. People are dying! Starving, being shot. Right now, on this earth, dammit. The planet is being destroyed. Why is this not enough to just stop??
You know, all of these "great" cultural revolutions, saying like "we've got the answer". It's ridiculous to assume that all it would have taken is to do just one simple thing. Stop. It doesn't require a life spent in the library, it doesn't require a messiah who travels the world and "enlightens" people. I would even assert that these attempts are doomed to fail, because they are inside the system. The system that is broken and toxic. Just look at communism or national socialism.
All we need to do is stop the engines. And then walk up to each other and ask "um, guys, what the hell are we doing? Did you put that here? Yeah, me neither. Well let's get it out of the way!". And we could learn to talk to each other like real, authentic human beings. This isn't some message like, let's all love each other and it will be alright. No, we need to get our act together and talk to each other. Right now, not on some conference. Not in a talkshow. Right here, on the street. With whoever is with you.
You think a charity will solve it for you? The friendly politician next door? Laughable. Absolutely laughable. Just, look at representative democracy. It's ridiculous. You vote for some person who will vote for another person and this guy is then supposed to represent you in questions like the financial destiny of the country? Who came up with this? I agree it's the best system we have. But that's just because we don't have the creativity and imagination right now to come up with something better.
The tragedy of this is, it could happen tonight. It could have happened every single day in human history. But it just won't. After you're done reading this, if you made it through, you'll think something along the lines of: well ok, I'm going to think about this later and you'll forget it and go right back to work tomorrow just like me. And we'll keep playing the game. I mean I myself did not have the courage to right there and then start it and ask people: "Is this really how you want to live?". I couldn't say it, because it's impolite and insulting and transgressing. But in my eyes it's the only thing that could save us. A complete annihilation of culture. The ultimate lesson from history is that if people tried to make it better, they made it worse. A whole lot.
As Terence McKenna said: "this is too nightmarish to contemplate".
I was wondering for along time why I was so drawn towards psychedelics. And now I know. I was unconsciously desperately looking for an escape hatch from culture. The culture which literally made me insane. Guys, I don't even care about hallucinations or meeting god or anything like that. I mean, that sounds like a fun pastime. It's something you can do on a nice afternoon walk. But we really have other problems on our hands right now.
Well, I'm sober now. I can feel the culture creeping back up on me. It's inescapable even if i cut myself off completely from influence. I have no hope of this idea ever gaining a foothold. It requires too much bravery. We are too childish for it. All I can do is get back in the game like the rest of us. You'll probably wave this off as just a funny idea. That's alright. Thank you for giving this some time.
I'm living in a nightmare right now. Because I know the way, but it just won't be taken. And it's just so simple. It's ridiculously simple.
I took quite a large dose of LSD two days ago and at the peak I took a walk in a park. Great decision. I was experiencing what i would call daoist existence. I was just strolling along, doing my legs what they want to do, looking at things and contemplating them. For example I discovered the fractal nature of trees (it was winter) and wondered who did that. I realized the tree probably didn't do it, because I didn't order my body to grow the way it did either (even though I would like to do that, haha). Well, I was totally at peace with myself and the world, as there were essentially no more boundaries between myself and other beings of any kind. And it was just so dignified and somehow grown up. I felt like an adult for the first time in my life. I could think straight for the first time. Culture literally poisoned my thinking, made me childish and afraid.
So, you know, I was just thinking about this and walking along and then I was at the river. It's like a little island in the city, an island of nature. And them I'm looking back at the city and it turns out, I'm able to judge it completely unprejudiced. I had been catapulted completely outside of the culture. And I realize through that that the metaphor "jungle" for "city" is perfect. Houses are literally like trees. And in the morning all the monkeys awaken in their places in the trees and they put on some funny clothes to look serious and they put on a straight face and do, you know, serious business. Like tipping on a keyboard. Or delivering parcels to other monkeys who couldn't get them themselves because they're to busy doing business. And when all the monkeys are done doing the chores and duties of the tribe they hurry back into their trees. You know, like hush hush the night is coming. Bad people are out there. And you gotta catch some sleep so you can be serious tomorrow and squeeze some movie or something in between there.
And then everyone just goes back into their cell, like in a prison, you know. Until in the morning the doors are opened and there's a meal and work and then you can do stuff with the other inmates. But, the problem with our prison, our society is, there are no guards! Goddammit. We are doing this to ourselves. Get it? I was walking down the streets then, thinking about this and that problem the world has right now. And then i finally got it. I finally knew what should be done. Just STOP. Stop what you're doing, right now. Like, literally stop driving your car, stop getting the groceries, stop watching television, stop consuming like the addict children that we are. If everybody would just do that for a moment and forget who they are in their society, their job, their name, their role. Like the whole world stopped turning. We would have time and the good sense to talk about WHAT is going on and what should be done about it. And i promise you, 90% of the worlds problems would be solved in an afternoon.
People who weren't in the state i was in, so basically everyone around me, would have said, well if I don't go to work a thousand people are waiting to take my position. I will be trampled by people desperate for doing what I'm doing. But the great secret is, that it's worthless. It won't make you happy or sane. All it can do is secure you a relatively comfortable position in society. And I mean that's the best you can hope for and apparently this is what most people are shooting for. And you gotta be thankful for it and say "thank you master" to the culture because a whole lot of people got it worse around here and you might become one of them. And to forget it all you drink your vodka and go to parties where you can literally not talk to people over the senseless drum beats and dance with the other monkeys and then you chug it down with a little television and "funny" internet memes. And that's your damn life? (Excuse the swear words, I am just done being polite about this). Just how anti social is this society?
I mean, I wanted to ask people on the streets, what the hell is this how you want to live your life? Really? I mean, superficially, all of them must say yes, we do want to live like that. Because we get up everyday and keep this machine running. We won't stop it. This steaming pile we call our culture. People are dying! Starving, being shot. Right now, on this earth, dammit. The planet is being destroyed. Why is this not enough to just stop??
You know, all of these "great" cultural revolutions, saying like "we've got the answer". It's ridiculous to assume that all it would have taken is to do just one simple thing. Stop. It doesn't require a life spent in the library, it doesn't require a messiah who travels the world and "enlightens" people. I would even assert that these attempts are doomed to fail, because they are inside the system. The system that is broken and toxic. Just look at communism or national socialism.
All we need to do is stop the engines. And then walk up to each other and ask "um, guys, what the hell are we doing? Did you put that here? Yeah, me neither. Well let's get it out of the way!". And we could learn to talk to each other like real, authentic human beings. This isn't some message like, let's all love each other and it will be alright. No, we need to get our act together and talk to each other. Right now, not on some conference. Not in a talkshow. Right here, on the street. With whoever is with you.
You think a charity will solve it for you? The friendly politician next door? Laughable. Absolutely laughable. Just, look at representative democracy. It's ridiculous. You vote for some person who will vote for another person and this guy is then supposed to represent you in questions like the financial destiny of the country? Who came up with this? I agree it's the best system we have. But that's just because we don't have the creativity and imagination right now to come up with something better.
The tragedy of this is, it could happen tonight. It could have happened every single day in human history. But it just won't. After you're done reading this, if you made it through, you'll think something along the lines of: well ok, I'm going to think about this later and you'll forget it and go right back to work tomorrow just like me. And we'll keep playing the game. I mean I myself did not have the courage to right there and then start it and ask people: "Is this really how you want to live?". I couldn't say it, because it's impolite and insulting and transgressing. But in my eyes it's the only thing that could save us. A complete annihilation of culture. The ultimate lesson from history is that if people tried to make it better, they made it worse. A whole lot.
As Terence McKenna said: "this is too nightmarish to contemplate".
I was wondering for along time why I was so drawn towards psychedelics. And now I know. I was unconsciously desperately looking for an escape hatch from culture. The culture which literally made me insane. Guys, I don't even care about hallucinations or meeting god or anything like that. I mean, that sounds like a fun pastime. It's something you can do on a nice afternoon walk. But we really have other problems on our hands right now.
Well, I'm sober now. I can feel the culture creeping back up on me. It's inescapable even if i cut myself off completely from influence. I have no hope of this idea ever gaining a foothold. It requires too much bravery. We are too childish for it. All I can do is get back in the game like the rest of us. You'll probably wave this off as just a funny idea. That's alright. Thank you for giving this some time.
I'm living in a nightmare right now. Because I know the way, but it just won't be taken. And it's just so simple. It's ridiculously simple.
our limitations, work from there. 
