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I think I saw my death in hyperspace, or at least a potential version of it?

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Rising Star
I havent posted in quite some time so I apologize if this isn't the right place for this but...

For a little context, A few months back I had my RV broken into and all of my personal items stolen from me, I dont know how PTSD works but the whole situation kind of took away any feeling of security that I had, and I never had closure on the situation.

And A few week ago I had a DMT session that shook me to my core. In a nutshell I experienced what I think might've been my death (and not of the EGO).

Without going into details, suffice it to say that it was not a desirable way to go. Out of hyperspace tho, I've been growing more and more paranoid, to the point where I'm truly scared to be alone.
I catch myself doing things like looking out the window and thinking that I recognize people as if they're following me, thinking conspiratorially generally.

And when I talk to the few friends I have, hearing myself say the words describing how I've been thinking...i sound like a freakin nutjob. And I guess what I'm asking is if this has happened to anybody else, and if so...how did you remedy the situation? I have no desire to do DMT again anytime soon, and a psychiatrist is a possibility but I'm on MEDI-CAL so im not sure about the quality of care I will get.

I can tell that any patience my friends have is wearing thin, and my next step is the psyche ward. Its incredibly stressful living like this, and I just want to be able to sit by myself in silence without thinking the worst.
The mere fact that you realize the situation, and are able to analyze it from the outside is a lot. It makes it clear that you certainly have a way out of it, and you can do it, also because you know (more or less) the causes that triggered it.

My advice is to consult a psychologist / psychiatrist (look for one with whom you feel comfortable talking, crying, yelling...you have to let it all out. Look for one who knows about psychedelics, even online sessions are fine).

The second piece of advice is not to use psychedelics for quite some time in your life. Try to REALLY get back to the base. In addition to biological factors, there are also other psychological factors to consider, which in my opinion greatly extend what is usually considered a "full recovery".
After having some bad experiences, it took me at least 6 months to really feel on earth. It also depends on you and what you do, of course.

The third tip is: distract yourself, do worldly things. For example, in that period I learned to cook, every day I made new dishes with very difficult recipes.

Slowly, you will see that it will always get better...don't worry and don't panic. You are strong and above all you are aware of your problem.
Hi SpireCatalyst! I'm sorry to hear about your situation. Like MAGMA17 said, you should ground your self, do normal mundane things and definitely quit (non prescribed) drugs for now.

It seems like you are stuck in a negative thought loop that reinforces itself. Calming down, finding ways to relax and positive encounters with other people can help to cut the feedback loop.

DMT experiences can be extremely stressful. Usually though, as the time passes the emotional memory will get weaker.

Time is at your side, if you just can find ways to keep calm.

Take care!
Ill try to explain how this works.

Those kind of thoughts are not that uncommon, its the way the brain is made to function, survival mechanisms that, for example, recognize the worst possible outcomes to prevent them, when this little brain functions go out of whack is when we start calling them "diseases" or "disorders" and such, in this case anxiety, paranoia...

In that sense there is nothing wrong with you, obviously we do want this functions to be in balance, otherwise simply existing can become very uncomfortable, borderline unbearable.

Sounds like you recognize this thoughts as somewhat intrusive, though having been broken into your RV, I assume that means your home?, might make the whole thing feel more like a bit of a real threat, so this part of you has all the reasons to be hyperactive.

Going to a psychologist/psychiatrist is worth a shot IMO, work through the constant feeling of insecurity and the PTSD.

Other than that and what others said, I feel like this is a bit of a "wait it out" situation, work through the feelings (when you get paranoid focus on what the underlying feelings are) and take care of yourself as much as you can, you know, food, exercise...
Some self defence lessons might not be a bad plan also. It's hard to not feel like a victim when you are helpless. Grow confidence in your ability to hold your ground.
SpireCatalyst said:
I havent posted in quite some time so I apologize if this isn't the right place

I can tell that any patience my friends have is wearing thin, and my next step is the psyche ward. Its incredibly stressful living like this, and I just want to be able to sit by myself in silence without thinking the worst.
i have experienced some paranoia like that,but fortunately i always had a doctor to tell him and he prescribed me an antipsychotic medication and i got better.no big side effect or anything.
if i had no medication and no one to talk,i think i have reached a level to think different even if my body wants from me to think like that.cause i had these experiences.
but for someone who has no experience it is quite hard to understand that it will get better some day and life isn't that stressful that you need to always watch everyones moves.
and i see you have a core fear,exactly like me.i had a big fear that i couldn't talk about it and that was the reason i was getting paranoid.because i didn't want to reach that fear ever.
after i talked to a psychoanalyst he told me there is a way to solve every problem and nothing can really be that bad to make our life all sad and unbearable.
think about all problems you have passed.did you think they could get solved when you were involved in those problems?but all of them are passed and you are here.
i don't know whats your fear exactly if thats death,i can try to convince you there is no bad death and no bad thing unless we think irrational,when ever we put rational thinking away there will be all the fears and unimaginable possible ways to reach bad results.
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