I would appreciate advice about my health issue, feeling dizzy and sleep paralyses

[Invoker]

Hi!

I don't know where exactly should I post this because as a new member I can't post in "Health" subforum.

Anyway I've got this problem that few months ago I did some powerful DMT and kambo ceremonies.
They were in such order:

1. little cannabis + little schrooms + pretty big changa trip - 3 times going to hyperspace in a row. very blissful trips.
2. One week later powerful and very disturbing (but also beautiful) LSD + cannabis trip. It was first disturbing trip in my life.
3. 1 kambo dot + rape + 4 "little cups" of very light Ayahuasca (this trip was quite mild in power but lasted like 15 hours). The trip was a little diffucult sometimes but felt really cleansed afterwards.

At this point I think I was fine.

But then:

3. Very powerful changa trip (I posted a trip report in first steps in hyperspace thread)
link: Very powerful mystical changa trip that changed my life forever - First steps in Hyperspace - Welcome to the DMT-Nexus
4. Pretty powerful Ayahuasca trip that was very difficult for me and after that I did break from tripping.
5. And in the meantime 3x kambo ceremony ~ 4 / 5 dots each. (I used it also with intention to ground me after my DMT trips cause I was really detached. I regret doing this kambo now but well what's done is done).

My HPPDs got a little bit more intense after all this, but they're still enjoyable for me. (I preffer having them over not having them - my colour perception is deepened and more saturated, while I look on mandalas they start to move in spiral ways after a while)

Problem is that after my last kambo and this alast aya somewhere I started to feel "lightheaded" almost all the time. It's not ruining my life, but I would love to stop feeling that.

And my question is: do you think it is a problem with the brain or with the heart?
I'm thinking to go to doctor but I don't know about telling him about Ayahuasca, kambo etc... he might say something like "you have what you pleased for" etc. I'm generally scared a bit of total misunderstanding from medical care.

Also since my DMT trips I have problems with sleep paralysis, which occurs very often. Some of them I can manage through meditation and turn them into quite OK experiences. But sometimes they are so severe that even my meditative experience can't help me there and I'm waking up very scared with anxiety and feeling of irritation or even anger.

I'm exercising (running) I don't drink alcohol nor smoke. I don't take ANY drugs now. I'm eating quite healthy and taking good vitamins and supplements. But still this stuff is not getting better yet and it gets me worried (my last trip was few months ago, and I smoked cannabis 3 times in last 3 months or something)

I have a friend who is a psychiatrist I hope she will help me on this a little, but I wanted to ask you guys since you're very experienced in the subject. Also I found this forum while looking for solution to this problem and seeking help about trip integrations and post-trip issues.

I think I did read somewhere here that while DMT don't "damage" brain , harmalas can. And I think these Ayas and changas were heavy on harmalas and I'm scared I damaged my brain. Any comments on that please?

If you need any more details about my situaion just ask please I'm very determined to figure this all out and I'm trying my best to live a healthy life. But feeling lightheaded and having totally disrupted sleep routine doesn't help me.

Also I'm going almost two years into psychodynamic psychotherapy which helps me a lot with my psychological crises. But well as you surely know therapy can sometimes be also disturbing so that could be the factor too.

I would appreciate any advice or comments/questions.
Thank you for your time reading this.

 

[entheogenic-gnosis]

...I honestly do not think a doctor would pass judgement, and a doctor, or an individual educated in the medical field is your best bet on getting reliable and accurate information.

I suffer from sleep paralysis as well, this has been an issue since my early teens and was not related to drug use, but I understand how terrifying these things can be, often times I can not breathe when it happens...

Any way, I can not provide advice, but am interested.

-eg

 

[Invoker]

Thanks for the answer Actually it IS some advice

As to a doctor: yeah I think I'll give it a try. Thou I'm living in a country where psychedelics have really bad reputation... people are very judgemental where it comes to these things, especially older generation people.

As to sleep paralyses I recommend you this article, it helped me:

eachnight - Mattress Guides and Bedding Resources

Looking for a new mattress or bedding? See our in-depth mattress and bedding guides that cover everything so you can start getting the best nights rest.

vanwinkles.com

You probably know all this by now since you have for so long time, but well, this is really nicely written article and I simply recommend it

Btw. as to harmalas being eventually neurotoxic I found this thread on nexus:

is harmaline toxic? - Harmalas - Welcome to the DMT-Nexus

It seems like I shouldn't really be worried about harmalas and DMT. Thou I think such dizziness could be part of HPPD. Seems like some other people with slight HPPD have similar symptoms.

HPPD?! Scared! Would love to hear your opinion

Hi, hope you guys are doing well. I'm starting my blog as many others do .. I took LSD 8 weeks ago and have a couple of concerning symptoms I would like to share with you. The 2 - 3 weeks after I took acid I was very dizzy / had vertigo (when I walked around it felt like being on a boat). I went ...

hppdonline.com

HPPD-Learning to cope, thinking I have HPPD

I'm 19, and recently I have been going through what I think could quite possibly be HPPD. Here's my story, and I know you've all probably read a lot o

hppd44118.yuku.com

Just sharing my thoughts out loud.

 

[TeaDaze]

Hi Invoker,

Sorry you're going though this. I have likewise had negative side effects from psychoactive use and feared I had permanent damage. A very intense LSD+MDMA experience left me with high levels of anxiety, panic attacks, and frequent sleep paralysis issues for months. After my first DMT experience I was also waking up in the middle of the night in a sweat feeling like I had eaten mushrooms. All these issues subsided though. I always felt like each week was a bit better than the last. I've come to have faith that my mind will come back into balance after such experiences, but it takes time. I can't say if this this will hold true for you though, or again in my own future. At some point if the current approach to healing isn't working it may be time to try something different, especially if it is having a negative impact on your life.

I sympathize with the fear of your doctor's reaction. Do you live in a place where you can choose which doctor to see? If you are concerned about older generations being judgmental then seek out a younger one. Depending on where you live, you may also be able to find reviews written by previous patients to help make a decision. Either way, remember that you made the decision to have these experiences knowing there are risks. Healing is part of the journey. Try not to let a doctor's closed mind affect you too much... It's their problem, not yours.

Keep us posted how it goes.

 

[Invoker]

Thanks man I also feel a lot of empathy for you. I've read a great deal about HPPD some weeks ago. It was actually nice to get that knowledge because as a person who is talking about psychedelics on scientific conferences too it's really good to know its "bad side" too, so I'm not too quick about advocating anything, just trying to stay objective. Anyway when I read how SEVERE it is for some people it really got me thinking about all these people advocating that "psychedelics are safe". (I'm also of course supporting responsible psychedelic use, but not in such a naive-bravery way anymore). Because aside of psychological dangers, they have this thing that we don't know why one trip can actually ruin someone life due to severe neurological changes that for some are really hard to get cured. My HPPDs are actually mostly enjoyable and I wouldn't like to have them gone. Just those two aspects I listed above. So I may call myself even sort of lucky, or at least not "very unlucky".
I also hope the negative aspects will diminish with time.

Well I'm too getting better with time. I was in very bad shape after these trips... For example when I was watching Westworld I was very scared while before these trips this series would not scare me at all. I started taking some things very seriously after this. And there are this neurological aspects to it that are not well studied.

I share your observations and your faith too. I'm getting better slowly, I'm just getting worried that this lightheaded feeling and sleep paralyses are two things that didn't go away yet... :/ I'm really taking care of myself thats why it worries me even more that I havent healed yet. So I hope it will be better but I don't know for sure. But well, I guess worrying won't help much

Yeah, I'll try to find some nice doctor through people I know who is open minded.

Btw. I found this article stating that sleep paralyses could be actually signs of brain healing:

Night Terrors and Sleep Paralysis - Psychic Elements

What are night terrors and sleep paralysis. How can you deal with these terrifying ordeals that happen in your very own bed where you should feel safe?

psychicelements.com

But there are not any references... If someone knows some scientific articles that says these things I would appreciate the link. I personally hope its the truth, but I also hardly believe that.

Btw. LSD + MDMA sounds like great trip, but also like a pretty dangerous combo for the brain. I've made a decision that I'll never take any drug that is not psychedelic anymore (never did except few MDMA). I just don't see a reason anymore to endanger my brain over something not so profound as psychedelics.

For now I'm doing total break from drugs and trying my best to live healthy life. How are you faring? Wish you all the best and full recovery!

 

[TeaDaze]

It was actually nice to get that knowledge because as a person who is talking about psychedelics on scientific conferences too it's really good to know its "bad side" too...

This reminded me of the brain scientist Jill Bolte Taylor who had a stroke and wrote a book about the experience. I haven't read it myself but you might check it out if you are looking for optimism in your mind's ability to heal.

Btw. LSD + MDMA sounds like great trip, but also like a pretty dangerous combo for the brain. I've made a decision that I'll never take any drug that is not psychedelic anymore (never did except few MDMA). I just don't see a reason anymore to endanger my brain over something not so profound as psychedelics.

It's an amazing combination, if done right. I made several mistakes that night and needlessly compromised my safety... It was a learning experience early in my introduction to these substance. I paid the price but I'm glad I had the experience nonetheless.

For now I'm doing total break from drugs and trying my best to live healthy life. How are you faring? Wish you all the best and full recovery!

That's probably a good idea until you feel back to normal. I'm fine. My first use of DMT a month ago definitely affected my sleep cycle but it's getting better. No regrets trying it

 

[Invoker]

It's an amazing combination, if done right. I made several mistakes that night and needlessly compromised my safety... It was a learning experience early in my introduction to these substance. I paid the price but I'm glad I had the experience nonetheless.

I can imagine that. I remeber this one time when I was listening to this song while on MDMA + cannabis:

It was definiately one of most beautiful moments of my life. Also I was then in the forest and all the trees looked so fractalish and beautiful like in paradise. Together with my mescaline + cannabis trip and my changa trip it was most beautiful moment I ever experienced. But cannabis + MDMA other time screwed me up badly. MDMA + psychedelics seems like very dangerous but very rewarding combination I think cannabis + any psychedelic goes the same way. Could be extremely beautiful but also scary as hell, that's my experience at least but I read a lot of opinions like that.

That's probably a good idea until you feel back to normal. I'm fine. My first use of DMT a month ago definitely affected my sleep cycle but it's getting better. No regrets trying it

I can relate to that I don't regret any of my trips. I just hope to cure out everything and be more responsible in the future anyway

 

[TeaDaze]

Cannabis has screwed me over a few times as well. I had a panic attack on it once, out of the blue, and ever since then I get really nervous about using it again.

I like the song you shared there. Atmospheric / ambient singing and chanting like that send me to another dimension. I recently listened to this on a DMT + LSD trip: Shiva Nataraj (Banco De Gaia Remix). It actually left me cursing in confusion over how and why these experiences are so ridiculously marvelous and beautiful. It's such a gift- but why? lol DMT

I just hope to cure out everything and be more responsible in the future anyway

Drug use is like being in a relationship. At some point you might unwittingly push a boundary thinking you can get away with it but s/he pushes back to let you know you've gone too far. Lesson learned. Don't overstep your bounds there again. Be respectful and don't overstep them so far that s/he breaks up with you or kills you!

 

[Running Bear]

You over did it which is the same mistake I made over a year go. If you suffer from depression or anxiety you really have to pay attention to set and setting. If your neurotransmitters are all out of whack and you burst your brain full of powerful psychedelics, things are going to go bad. When I was depressed I took a heavy dose of ayahuasca then suffered from depersonalization disorder for 9-10 months. I was so afraid that I didn't leave the house for months, I thought I lost it. I got out of that hell by pushing myself and staying busy. My sleep paralysis comes on when im tired and stressed out. I think if you stay busy and get enough sleep you'll come back. Try to stay away from people and activities that stress you out.

 

[Invoker]

Thank you so much for this great stories and words of comfort guys

Cannabis has screwed me over a few times as well. I had a panic attack on it once, out of the blue, and ever since then I get really nervous about using it again.

I feel you there. It screwed me over few times too, especially when I smoked cannabis before peak of a 150 ug LSD trip... things went pretty far (it had the power of a DMT trip I'd say)... among some greatly beautiful things that I seen I had disturbing visions and paranoia that I'm in a psychiatric hospital (while in reality I was in the forest on psytrance festival) and my relatives, academic teachers etc. were visiting me and saying things like "why did you take this drugs son...". But I also felt like sort of savant and realized some truth I couldn't grasp. It was really weird trip... (I had horrible set & setting there again, stupid me! But the afterglow was very long and extremely beautiful and it taught me some lessons so it was worth it)

But nevertheless, personally I think cannabis is a very beautiful substance as long we treat it with respect as any other psychedelic. Smoke it rarely, use vaporizer, take tokes slowly, give them time, don't overload the brain all at once but raise THC gradually, smoke cannabis that is well cultivated and of good sort, and have perfect set & setting. And if combining it with other stuff than take even more preparations and respect and best smoke after the peak of a psychedelic so things don't go out of hand. I think cannabis + mescaline is uber synergy.
And I think that (and actually experienced it), that good cannabis alone if vaped properly and treated right can take you to hyperspace. And it's "funny" that some people use it like some alcohol (not that I'm criticizing that, just shows how extremely verstatile this 'magical' substance is).

I like the song you shared there. Atmospheric / ambient singing and chanting like that send me to another dimension. I recently listened to this on a DMT + LSD trip: Shiva Nataraj (Banco De Gaia Remix). It actually left me cursing in confusion over how and why these experiences are so ridiculously marvelous and beautiful. It's such a gift- but why? lol DMT

Thanks The song you posted is very nice too Yeah I have this feeling too sometimes!! That this beauty is so great that its almost unbearable and unbelievable.

I just hope to cure out everything and be more responsible in the future anyway
Drug use is like being in a relationship. At some point you might unwittingly push a boundary thinking you can get away with it but s/he pushes back to let you know you've gone too far. Lesson learned. Don't overstep your bounds there again. Be respectful and don't overstep them so far that s/he breaks up with you or kills you!

So true man. I think exactly the same and I really take these words to heart. It's "funny" how much almost everything about psychedelics connects with different aspects of Love...

You over did it which is the same mistake I made over a year go. If you suffer from depression or anxiety you really have to pay attention to set and setting. If your neurotransmitters are all out of whack and you burst your brain full of powerful psychedelics, things are going to go bad. When I was depressed I took a heavy dose of ayahuasca then suffered from depersonalization disorder for 9-10 months. I was so afraid that I didn't leave the house for months, I thought I lost it. I got out of that hell by pushing myself and staying busy. My sleep paralysis comes on when im tired and stressed out. I think if you stay busy and get enough sleep you'll come back. Try to stay away from people and activities that stress you out.

It's great to read that you did get out of it. It gives me more hope, thank you I promise myself to don't do such a stupid thing ever again... well, as TeaDaze posted, "Lesson learned" - I hope.
Were you tripping since that time at all?

 

[Running Bear]

yeah I was smoking freebase dmt and changa, which is a very stupid thing to do when you have a depersonalization disorder. I'm taking a break from dmt until I'm 100% again. I think you should do the same.

 

[Invoker]

Damn, I feel sorry for you then. But thanks for sharing this information! It shows that long break is really good idea. I have a friend who was in a bit in similiar situation and he did like 2/3 years break from psychedelics and after it he smoked changa with fine results.

I think I'll do as you say. I'll just stay with meditation for now. No reason to going back there yet anyway. It's good to give oneself time to heal on many layers...

Keeping my fingers crossed for your recovery guys!

PS: I want to share with you something that helped most in this process of "getting myself together":

I wanted to share this, it's really worth the watch/listen when struggling in life in genereal, especially with things like that It is thing that lets me get a great sleep like I had today.

Also I have to make a short break from the forum cause I have a lot of writing to do (deadlines are SHORT) and I can't procrastinate right now. So see you next week or something Cheers!