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Is anxiety before a trip normal? Is it holding me back?

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Rising Star
Hi all, this is my first post here. It sounds like a bit of a silly question now that I’ve asked it but I’d just like to get a general idea from anyone that’s willing to chime in.

I feel like my anxiety is holding me back from experimenting/using DMT, so allow me elaborate on my position a little.

I have smoked DMT many times before (I haven’t really been taking count) mostly using Changa and have only really managed, or wanted, to enter what seems a parallel version of this reality; with plants and trees turning into entities/people, and insane psychedelic surroundings. That was a long story short.

However, I do have a vague memory of coming face-to-face (while on DMT) with what seemed like a feminine being/face. All I can remember are her eyes, maybe her lips/a feeling of being kissed, and possibly that she was green in colour (I think). It’s such a vague memory though that I have to question whether it’s real or if I’ve just made it up. That being said the memory seemed to be triggered while reading a trip report on this forum.

I’d also like to mention that I have broken through, or entered a dream twice on Salvia. This was almost 10 years ago now and was quite a traumatising experience. I was totally unaware of the power of the substance, where it came from, and I was pretty much coerced into smoking it by some friends who’d bought it and who had previously had much milder experiences than I was about to...

It felt like hell; for eternity, or at least that’s what I remember. There was more to it but the overall vibe was very bad. I do remember a presence at the very end of the trip though, when it felt like my very being had nothing left. A huge silhouette of someone (male) performing the lotus position in front of a blazing inferno told me “Do Not Worry”, or something along those lines. Like I said, I can’t remember if it was real now or not but I’m pretty damn sure it was.

I’d quickly like to thank anyone who finds the time to read and reply, and to everyone on this website and forum for their contributions to this priceless source of wisdom.

P.S. I have successfully followed Lazyman’s tek using MHRB and have achieved around 1-2% from my first attempts. I think I have enough material to work with for some time now.
Yes, anxiety is quite normal. Many people have it.
And yes, it can hold you back in a way.

What you don't want is to get stuck in a state of mind where on the one hand, DMT becomes almost an obsession and you think about it all the time, and where on the other hand you constantly find reasons not to do it because of the fear.

You should decide for yourself if you want to do it or not. If you have clearly decided that you do want to experiment further, then you should just ignore your fears and simply do it. Just say to yourself "I decided that i realy want to do it, so i have to overcome my fear".
I'd just like to say that in 10 years of vaporising DMT (<20 times, mind you), I was pretty much extremely anxious before each and every attempt. :) It's an intense experience, so it is hard not to have butterflies.

I wouldn't let that sway you one way or another. Just wait until you feel like you are ready to have an experience, then go for it.
There's always some anxiety. DMT offers an immense experience after all.

Have some honey tea, relax, breathe and meditate a bit beforehand. It can help. Even it you're still anxious it should at least help to get over this hurdle more easily.
Cool thread. You've plenty of experience with DMT. Changa is a superb approach, typically a bit gentler than the full on, smoke out, DMT chrysanthemum into self annhialative hyperspace. Interestingly, like the full on Salvia wipe out had with smoked extract(enhanced leaf), neither are necessarily required for a full and functional psychedelic "lifestyle".

Using entheogenic colloquialisms, the "black out" from smoked Salvia, OR, the "white out" from smoked DMT(crystal), result in a common DEPERSONALIZED endspace, that when accessed with rapidity, IS often frightful.

While deep entheogenic trips, of any variety, can be anticipatorily anxious, those engenderd via rapid ROA(smoked DMT, smoked Salvia, IV/IM ketamine or DMT) may be the most nerve wracking premptively considered. Long haul, less radical concourse with the plant medicines, seems prudent.

Thanks for your replies. I'm still sat on the edge, I feel like I'm going to do it soon though.
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