obliguhl said:
I think it's natural selection at play. If you are worthless in terms of learned culture or genetics, you will end up lonely. Your body then speeds up the dying process so you can make room for better specimen.
In Short: Others decide if you should live or get sick and die fast.
One last point: Most people got no clue what it means to live in social isolation and have all kinds of bodily issues appear. That is because isolation stings like crazy for most people, even if you are not so isolated afterall but just not very popular.
Whatever...there is probably a point where one should accept fate.
Wow obli. Rather harsh. I am normally a fan of not pulling punches, but I disagree with your basic premise. The average person's opinion of worth is worthless, as shown by the fact that most geniuses are not social butterflies and are often unappreciated in their lifetime.
If it were up to the hoi polloi who lives longest, the world would be full of 100 year old Kim Kardashians. Honey Boo Boo would be a model of health, and Justin Bieber would be up for sainthood.
The entire concept that being
alone = loneliness and that
loneliness = poor health is simply not true. Mystics, yogis, saints and shaman have always sought remote locations and kept apart from the masses. And, in fact, these people are known to
outlive the average man by decades.
The word
sanctify means
to set apart and thus make holy. Our very notion of holiness and what makes someone a great soul come from the desire such people have to be away from the masses.
I think that lesser people who desire companionship and can not find it become depressed and that this depression is bad for your health. Life expectancy for the clinically depressed is lower than that of normal people... but this can be a statistical artifact because more depressed people commit suicide.
I can only really speak for myself. I choose to spend a lot of time alone, and mostly feel great about it. From time to time, I desire some companionship and I go out. Most of the time, I return to my isolation with yet another example of why I prefer to be alone. Even when nothing really annoying or dramatic is involved, I find myself bored and feeling like my time would be better spent on one of my many never-ending projects. There are simply not enough hours in the day as it is, and to waste precious time being a character in other people's rather tawdry or petty films seems sadder to me than being alone and getting shit done.
As a DJ, I have a very fine vantage point from which to view human social interaction. People tend to forget about the DJ booth and I become a fly on the wall unless I choose to draw attention to myself. It is like being an anthropologist watching primitive human mating rituals. Or like making a documentary about some animals in the wild. As sad and inane as what most people find interesting to talk about is
normally, it gets worse when they drink. Much worse. To say nothing about the fighting.
My feeling is that being around all but the
best humanity has to offer inevitably leads one into their dramas. They drain your energy, and vex your spirit. They have no peace inside, and their inner conflict spills out onto the people around them. Frustrated, overworked people become abusive, and people pass that abuse on. The turd ball rolls downhill with everyone taking it out on the next weaker person until someone snaps and real drama flares up.
More people = more drama = more stress
If the drama doesn't kill you directly, stress is a bigger killer than loneliness IMHO.
Thus, the wise tend to avoid the masses. They discourage vexing people from being in their sphere of influence. Doing so enables them to achieve self-mastery. And, it is these people... the masters... that I crave the company of. Unfortunately, there are not a whole lot of them around, and, as I said, they tend to avoid other people and are mostly hermits.
Until the day I get invited to join the Mage's Guild or some other worthy gang or cabal, I will continue to prefer being alone to being with idiots. I will never be so lonely that I prefer mediocrity or morons to peace of mind. I am
sure my lengthy hours in front of the computer are worse for me than my disdain for unworthy company.
Note: I am
rather healthy for my age. The people I grew up with who stayed in the thick of city life all look
much older than me, and have far more health issues. I have only had to see a doctor once in the last 25 years.
www.slate.com
then more so. 
to all you guys. May you have the rare blessing of being understood... even if it is only by a small & very select VIP list. Understanding, loving, and being loved are far easier fish to coax into your frying pan, because trying to make yourself understood is nearly always a fool's errand.
