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Obsessed with drugs?

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T

Trips

Rising Star
I am OBSESSED with drugs. Completely and entirely. It is all consuming. I study chemistry and pharmacology, I synthesize, extract, and read absolutely everything I can. I want to dedicate my life to the amazing study of consciousness and these substances. How do Nexus members compare? I've never met anyone in my life who came CLOSE to being as passionate as I am.

To choose between my relationship with my wife and my passion would be very difficult, as both would leave me equally empty.
 
Not actually. I'd keep her lol. But pretty damn close. I'd mourn the loss for years.
 
LOL was going to say poor wife lol I know what you mean, im not obsessed with chemistry, wish I was but I get what I want. the last few weeks ive been trying different combinations of things, and Im always thinking of things to do, to take, what buzz I want and on what occasion, seriously think I need a large dose of ayahuasca to sort me out, was even thinking today about going somewhere and trying ibogaine, because maybe that would make me happy being sober.

I can be happy sober, I have great family and friends and I like my job but Ive got this constant want to get "tripping" or "high" I take drugs in two ways, one for fun and one where I go and lie in my bed and take whats given to me. (no jokes eh lol)

Like this week ive tried morning glory for the first time, and hbws seeds twice, with datura seeds passion flower and peppermint, like an idiot I realised the water Im using may have had chlorine in it, bottled water, which worked mildly in the past but not now. So ive had no success this week but Ive got more soaking, with de-ionised water for tomorrow morning, thatl be four days this week ive woke up and not ate and tried to have a trippy day, due to stupidity its not happened, its all a learning curve I suppose :oops: :(

Ive always really liked psychedelics, but since getting into dmt and this site its went even further, with all the different things and effects you can get, actually I blame this site for turning me into this obsessed psychonaut! lol
 
See, and I don't even mean like that. I don't actually get high very often at all. But extracting, growing, poking, prodding, planning, reading, preparing & learning... these take allllll my time. Haha, I actually trip balls maybe 4 times a year (not including the two spice trips a month). I'm in University and marijuana makes me retarded, so I only smoke maybe 10 times a year.

I'm not obsessed with the highs, I'm not obsessed with the alterations of consciousness, I'm obsessed with ANYTHING that revolves around drugs. You can barely move through my house these days, it's like a god damn jungle of Salvia, Kratom, Cacti, Morning Glory and a bajillion others. I'm obsessed with the vines of purple flowers climbing towards my ceiling (they actually grow very well indoors). I'm obsessed with talking about drugs, chatting about drugs, anything to do with them. I have no idea why.

I don't know where you draw the line between passion and obsession.

I'm still waiting to meet someone like me. I don't think I ever will. Haha! If nobody here is, then probably not.
 
Obsessed - i check out the glassware in movies, get called a chemist by shop owners(im a software developer and know nothing about chemistry except what iv learned here) spend most of my time trying to theorize new teks or find errors in the ones iv worked with, eyeball every plant i walk past(iv even gone ninja collecting for cacti late at night(climbing walls- carrying 30kg pieces home)) etc...
Totally loving this new hobby.
 
I understand the feeling. It's empowering that the "drugs" we're interested in come directly from plants, and the the "chemistry" we do involves only collecting the chemicals from the plants--not substantially modifying or synthesizing them. It's a direct connection with the most awe-inspiring aspects of nature. And then the fact of how POWERFUL and RARE DMT is...

Modern culture takes so much away from us--ESPECIALLY the sense of empowerment. These shamanistic "drugs" return that sense of empowerment and INDIVIDUAL DETERMINATION to orders of magnitude greater than the average person has the priveledge to know about or experience.
 
Trips said:
See, and I don't even mean like that. I don't actually get high very often at all. But extracting, growing, poking, prodding, planning, reading, preparing & learning... these take allllll my time. Haha, I actually trip balls maybe 4 times a year (not including the two spice trips a month). I'm in University and marijuana makes me retarded, so I only smoke maybe 10 times a year.

I'm not obsessed with the highs, I'm not obsessed with the alterations of consciousness, I'm obsessed with ANYTHING that revolves around drugs. You can barely move through my house these days, it's like a god damn jungle of Salvia, Kratom, Cacti, Morning Glory and a bajillion others. I'm obsessed with the vines of purple flowers climbing towards my ceiling (they actually grow very well indoors). I'm obsessed with talking about drugs, chatting about drugs, anything to do with them. I have no idea why.

I don't know where you draw the line between passion and obsession.

I'm still waiting to meet someone like me. I don't think I ever will. Haha! If nobody here is, then probably not.
Click to expand...

I'm somewhat like that. I've done nothing, and nothing but countless days, days, and days of studying non-stop back and forth about anything on psychology, chemistry, pharamcology, botany, extractions, spirituality and religion. Drugs aren't exactly an obsession 100%, but its very very close. The only true obsession I have, isn't so much the drug itself but the knowledge that revolves around it.

Believe me, there are a lot of people out there like us, and this site is just one of the many, many examples.
 
Nope. Mescaline and DMT are just tools. An interesting hobby.
SWIM couldn't care less if he couldn't ever take DMT again. But if they took away his cactus, he'd riot!
 
I'm very closed to obsessed but I don't use them so much. I'm more obsessed reading, growing and extracting these compounds. And I like to introduce others to this world :)
I'm mostly interested in the healing properties of certain plants. I don't use the narcotic drugs. Those that can do you a lot of harm. Don't like that shit.
 
I have always been completely obsessed with anything that becomes an active interest.. The level of obsession definitely approaches that seen in Asperger's syndrome.. If not for my good social ability and ability to read people's emotions really well I'd almost think I had that..

That said, my biggest interests definitely form into obsessions.. It started when I was young with Ghostbusters, Ninja Turtles, later I had a Pokemon phase (mainly with the video game then card game, I admit I was too old for it, but it wasn't a big kiddy fad yet, the first game was still in japan then), as I got older I've had longer phases where I'm obsessed with other things.. Eastern Religion is a big one that still continues to this day.. psychology.. biology.. evolution.. drugs.. At least the obsessions became less from forced marketing and more from personal interests. They started to become more beneficial.. There's no real good result from being obsessed with and knowing everything about Ninja Turtles..

Being obsessed with eastern religion has led me down a lot of paths that have brought some inner peace and different views of things.. Extremely valuable.. Being obsessed with recreational drugs has left me with a vast amount of different kinds of substances to enjoy, all of which I can find on the internet.. Being obsessed with the sciences has left me with a good range of knowledge I never had before and a feeling of satisfaction, knowing how a lot of things work. Being obsessed with other kinds of drugs has given me control over what I put in my body. Most people have no clue what their doctors give them.. The faith mankind has in doctors is a little bit insane to me. They mess up.. a LOT.. Knowing about medicine and the mechanisms through which they act, etc etc is extremely liberating if you hate going to a judgmental doctor.. don't get me started on doctors.. one in particular ruined about a year of my life.. the way it played out, if you looked at the chain of events, he could have given me something for my anxiety near the beginning when I sought help and the rest of it would likely have not played out.. Anyway, I won't get into that.

I don't find obsession to be a bad thing.. It's really human nature in a way.. Being obsessed and being in love is a fine line.. The dedication necessary to win the girl many times overlaps with obsession.. People like myself in their mid 20's and likely people older than myself as well were raised by the TV much of the time, subject to very creative marketing teams who knew exactly what buttons to push to make us get our parents to buy their things.. Some of us were the types who had to know every detail about each of those things. Was that instilled in us, or would we have always been so innately obsessed with things? I think it's probable that without TV in our lives we'd have all found other things to be obsessed with..

So yea, I'm obsessed.. so are a lot of people who probably picked the option "It's a strong hobby, but I'm not OBSESSED".. a lot of people likely picked that, feeling obsession is a bad thing.. I'm sure Einstein was obsessed with figuring out the world around him and we know what that yielded.. Most of humanity's major breakthroughs, maybe all of them, were a product of either obsession or pure accident... don't be ashamed to be obsessed.. obsession just means you've embraced what you like fully and don't half-ass anything.. It's rewarding when the obsession wears off, but I'm not sure if it can with drugs.. there's just too many.. ;) The study of drugs, really, when you get down to it, is the study of life.. food and drinks can be studied just like drugs.. you can look at it all and how it breaks down into how we're made.. if you looked at every molecule and every chemical reaction and everything going on in the body and knew about it all, well, i can't think of a more rewarding obsession.
 
SWIM is somewhere maybe in between SWIM loves cultivating cacti and salvia and loves talking about everything talked about here, but SWIM actually uses somewhat sparingly only when SWIM feels the need to come back to whatever he was enjoying so I'd say SWIM is semi obsessed.
 
I can say pretty confidently that I've never been as obsessed with anything as I currently am with psychoactives. I've also never retained interest in a topic for as long as this. I always somehow manage to bring almost every conversation back to drugs. This causes some degree of concern in my non-psychonaut friends, even the ones who smoke weed or take opiates from time to time.

I've read up fairly extensively on most psychoactives that are at all in the public eye, and on a lot of obscure ones as well. Erowid is definitely one of my most used sites, maybe second only to Wikipedia.

I have heavily considered trying to make a psychonaut-related role playing game in which the protagonist gains powers and abilities from using different drugs, kind of somewhere between Pokemon and Final Fantasy... I was going to do something like have "Epinephrine", "Dopamine", and "Serotonin", instead of "Strength", "Intelligence", and "Magic" (or whatever). I'd simulate things like Serotonergic Hallucinogens by having them turn the Serotonin bar a different color, providing the Psychonaut with a different moveset... I have more shit on this if you guys are interested.

Despite all of my research, I haven't gotten to try the vast majority of the things I read about. I haven't done pure DMT or 5-MeO, I have no experience with LSD or Mescaline or DXM or Ketamine, and minimal interaction with stimulants and opiates. I've only had around 5 mushroom trips, all of which were extremely eye-opening, but none of them resulted in an ego-death experience. I had a brief fling with Ecstasy and 2-CB, and managed to get an ego-death out of it. However, psychedelics seem to encompass at least half of what I talk about. Even when I try to avoid the topic, it somehow comes out. This has bred some concern in the minds of my parents.
 
Completely obsessed, have been since I discovered MJ and Erowid at age 12. Been a drug geek and guru ever since, gaining immense knowledge on substances of which I did not even come across until years later(DMT), and some which I have not yet. DRUGS ARE ME! To quote Dali "I am drugs."
 
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