Hi.
Should I tell you that I'm so unsure of myself in the context of new communities that it has been several hours since I opened this post, gave it a totally-not-pretentious title, and decided to write 'Hi'.
There, now we have an actual sentence. What a challenge. Moving on.
My presence here was probably a long time coming, bound to happen. It's been a decade since any of my very limited experience with spice. I've always believed it when I said that psychedelics are tools; I don't know that I've ever intentionally used them as a tool. I do know that I'd like for that to change.
I've spent the last several years flitting from one interest to the next. Many before that seeking escape through narcotics and other unproductive pursuits. I'm grateful to have come out of that breathing. There were certainly enough opportunities for me not to. Much of that, I believe, was self-medication. I have a long history of and continue to struggle with depression. I am on the autism spectrum and nearly asocial. My upbringing provided me with many unresolved and negative emotions that are probably too intimate for an introductory post. The healing process has been glacial.
I have always gravitated toward altered states. As such, it is unsurprising that I find myself here. There are unexplored perspectives, missed connections, and deeper looks at myself that I think are the necessary next-steps for me. Nothing that I'm going to find while I isolate and repeat the same patterns day after day.
So, I think this is me trying to reach out. I can be awfully cryptic and verbose in my writing. Hopefully what I'm trying to say is decipherable. It's hard for me to tell sometimes.
The essence of this post is that I'm intent on a journey of self-exploration leveraged by psychedelics and that I think being a part of this forum will be good for me.
Thanks for reading.
Should I tell you that I'm so unsure of myself in the context of new communities that it has been several hours since I opened this post, gave it a totally-not-pretentious title, and decided to write 'Hi'.
There, now we have an actual sentence. What a challenge. Moving on.
My presence here was probably a long time coming, bound to happen. It's been a decade since any of my very limited experience with spice. I've always believed it when I said that psychedelics are tools; I don't know that I've ever intentionally used them as a tool. I do know that I'd like for that to change.
I've spent the last several years flitting from one interest to the next. Many before that seeking escape through narcotics and other unproductive pursuits. I'm grateful to have come out of that breathing. There were certainly enough opportunities for me not to. Much of that, I believe, was self-medication. I have a long history of and continue to struggle with depression. I am on the autism spectrum and nearly asocial. My upbringing provided me with many unresolved and negative emotions that are probably too intimate for an introductory post. The healing process has been glacial.
I have always gravitated toward altered states. As such, it is unsurprising that I find myself here. There are unexplored perspectives, missed connections, and deeper looks at myself that I think are the necessary next-steps for me. Nothing that I'm going to find while I isolate and repeat the same patterns day after day.
So, I think this is me trying to reach out. I can be awfully cryptic and verbose in my writing. Hopefully what I'm trying to say is decipherable. It's hard for me to tell sometimes.
The essence of this post is that I'm intent on a journey of self-exploration leveraged by psychedelics and that I think being a part of this forum will be good for me.
Thanks for reading.