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OP of "Horrible"

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ohayoco said:
GreenD, if you really are having emotional problems then talk to your doctor and ask to be referred to a psychologist, that would be the best course of action I feel. And stop taking psychedelics immediately just in case. I am wary of chastising you in case you are serious, but I have to admit that I am now sceptical of your motives, and you only have yourself to blame for that.

Treat others with sincerity, kindness and respect and you will get the right kind of attention.

Ohayoco, if you are really reading everything I say and still have concerns about my well being, you leave me confused. If I was still suffering from previous states of mind, a psychologist or a doctor would have done little to help, if not worsened my situation. Paxil & calm words weren't going to get me out of that state, I had to face it myself, learn, cope, and change.

But thanks for your concern. The real cure is talking, whether it be to yourself, or to others.
 
You confused everyone because you said it was a joke, then that it wasn't. So no-one knows whether it was for real or not, whether to believe you now or not. Anyway, I'm glad you're good now. :)
 
I was so envious of others, that they could feel love, compassion, connectedness. I was mad that I couldn't - why was it that my psychodelic experiences were so empty, so dark and grim? In reality - they weren't. They were just given in a different lens, at a inconvenient time for my psychology to accept.

My answer was different. I came to believe that I am a "dark angel" of sorts, therefore it's just natural that I have experiences like that. It would be foolish to think that the children of Light and the children of Darkness have the same paths to walk on. So the task would be to find out what I am and live accordingly.

Ideally, each thought, each forum post should be labeled with the "spiritual caste" of the writer. If everyone would be aware of the caste he/she belongs to, there would be no confusion because someone started to follow advice (or feel bad because of stories told) that only work for / relate to a specific type of person.
 
cellux said:
Ideally, each thought, each forum post should be labeled with the "spiritual caste" of the writer

I'm not sure I like the sound of that. Sounds like dividing people into categories based upon the nature of their psyche. The big thing I realised last year was that it is impossible to make rigid judgements/univeral judgements about the psyche as it is more prone to change than any other facet of a human being.

We live in an age where we can move freely between the archetypes taking on whatever roles we choose. We can be dark, light, chaotic, ordered...the only limits are the limits we put on our imagination.

So with something as infinitely complex as that...is it really worthwhile lumping people into solid categories?
 
Of course I don't want to set this theory into stone. It just came up one day as a possibility. I thought that a lot of suffering could be alleviated if it were true that we are of specific types and one should "eat" only those truths which are coming from one's "house".

If there is such a differentiation among us, then the task would be to find out our own "signature", so to speak and then we wouldn't have to feel ashamed when we can't align with something which is not and cannot be ours.

We live in an age where we can move freely between the archetypes taking on whatever roles we choose.

That would be really nice. I hope you are right.
 
To the OP

Having read your initial post and then this one it's clear you're not some dumbass who's only on here to cause hassles. You're an intelligent person who's been through difficult times but so have the majority of us on here, some considerably more so than others. You experienced something that's not at all uncommon in the later teenage years and I know this because I went through similar things at that age. As you say, you learn from it and you grow. It's often these negative states which cause the changes we need in life. One of the burdens of being able to see through the veil is that you need to deal with so much more shit than your average everyday guy in the street because you're so much more aware of the world and all it's faults.

I'm not going to berate and criticise you for what you did, this small episode on here will have made you aware of the futility of posting random crap on a website!! :lol: Whether it was a cry for help or whatever, I'll tell you right now that you will NOT find a more supportive and loving group of people online than this community. If you genuinely DID have a problem then you can be assured that this group of people on here would be offering you help and support even if you were a new person on the site, they're good people so don't cry wolf just in case you ever really do need some help. Seriously, I've made an arse of myself on here and learned from it so I hope that you can do the same.

Take care of yourself, tell us more about you and join the crowd 'cause you won't find a better community with real, genuine love and support than the Nexus.
 
Ident, you sound like me! :)

I'm not normal... non of us are, but I take chances in bending the flow of networks, I like to put a stick in the spoke once in a while, you may get mad, but hopefully you get back on again.

As for me being a 'Dark angel' or anyone for that matter, don't pre-determine such a thing, it will become a self-fulfilling prophecy. You don't have to experience the darkness, well... you do, but not perpetually. It's hard to say this, it may even be wrong; but you don't have to accept that darkness as your 'psyche'. We are plastic beings, meaning we are malliable, we can change, grow, heal, etc.

It's just really hard to drive the growth of yourself on such a fundamental level.

Wewrrtbhoooooooooo! Babadoo.

Is there a poetry or artwork section on here? Hypothetical question, I will look for it.
 
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