It's pretty incredible you posted this actually, because today I had a great experience. It had been awhile (maybe a couple months) since my last trip, and I've only smoked DMT a handful of times at this point. I've questioned whether or not I've actually broken through before, because whenever I smoke, seemingly no matter what the dose is, I have full use of my body. Every time I blast off, I get this urge to just close my eyes and explore this immense, infinite, and beautiful world there. And of course, sometimes it doesn't matter if my eyes or open or closed. Sometimes they're dark geometric shapes, with one being (at this point it has only been one being) leading me somewhere. I have to physically move my head to explore this place, even though my eyes are closed. Every single movement, from the slightest movement of my eyes and the slightest movement of my arms, in every direction, in what feels like beyond mere 360 degree dimension -- every movement has a direct impact on what I am seeing. The colors, geometric shapes, lights, and the being feels alive with me.
So today I had two experiences, both with an MAOI. I took a few good rips and came up real quick, and was just focused on the bowl on the table. I just started laughing hysterically, and got the urge to lay on the floor with my head in the pillow, so I did. Thats when I got the dark geometric shapes, what felt like a city almost, and the being trying to lead me into it, but I obviously couldn't travel deeper into this pillow. Clearly this was me on the cusp of a breakthrough, but I'm OK with that because it was still an extremely profound, eye opening, and refreshing experience. I was overwhelmed with love and joy and just positive emotions. I was rocking back and forth on the floor when I came back, enjoying the sparking colors in 3 dimensional space.
I had asked my buddy to give me a higher dose for the next trip, and he did. It was a little rushed at first, I was trying to take it slow, and he was warning me of that. So I was getting anxious. I was blasting off, but still hitting the bowl, and it got a lot easier to hit after everything got really trippy. The next thing I know is that I'm in this white space. I don't remember closing my eyes, but I was told they were closed. It was the most real, infinite, pure space I've ever been in. I was exploring it quickly, and I almost got up to walk around but there was just so much to experience while still sitting. I get the urge to just take a high dose and turn off the lights and explore that way with my eyes open. Because like I said, every time I do it, thats how it always is. I want to get up, move around, and explore what I believe to be a world within my mind.
My confusion comes from the fact that most people arent able to move when they break through. I feel like I have broken through. I've gotten big rips of high doses and no matter what happens I still have control of myself. Everything always feels so digital, technological, and advanced. That's why I prefer to have my eyes closed, and thats why I want to explore it.
Anyways, sorry for the tl;dr, but this was the first post I read after this experience tonight and it's really incredible. So here's my story on that.