Question about "thought decomposition"

[reddog]

I wondered, if anybody could confirm, what I'm experiencing every time on LSD. During the peak (~second to fourth hour) and later to some lesser degree, I experience what I call "thought decomposition". Mainly this consists of decomposing all thoughts, even the most basic ones (e.g. shifting the focus to some object) into their parts (single words or even parts of words). This feels like diving "into" a thought and mostly it means diving multiple levels down.

A thought like "Should I drink a glass of water?" decomposes into "I", "drink", "glass", "water". Afterwards there is a second level beyond this, where I am drawn into the context of a single word, where it decomposes into multiple meanings associated with it. In every stage I feel like I'm entering a new "room" or "space". This is quite challenging, because often this happens so fast, I can't remember what the thought has been on the higher level, and thus enter the new level with only a very vague sense of why I'm there. Eventually, I come back to where it all started as these additional levels sequentially collapse.

Has anyone experienced something similar, or is my mind really so very linguistically oriented?

 

[Swarupa]

This reminds me of the first time i'd taken LSD for a few years... during the first few hours every object I looked at I was aware of my mind breaking it down into what it is, what it’s made of, where it comes from, what it’s use is etc. This process can certainly be applied to the thought process itself, with sentences breaking down into individual words, multiple meanings of words becoming apparent, or words loosing meaning altogether, being left wordless.

With or without LSD I’ll often think to say or write something, only to have the whole process break down and remain silent. Quite often paragraphs will turn into sentences and sentences to an empty page, although i'm generally not that great with the words. Considering that words/thoughts form the structure of our mind/ego it’s not at all surprising that a substance like LSD can have these kind of effects on the mind. Still a very interesting observation, thanks for bringing it up.

 

[hixidom]

I agree that, while on LSD, thoughts are hyper-symbolic. How they come to be so symbolic, I don't know. Decomposing a sentence and reinterpreting each word is one way, but I don't think it's necessary. For example, on LSD I have pointed to something with a clear thought in mind, only to find that a fellow tripper interpreted my pointing a completely different way. My pointing in this case was symbolic for many different thoughts/meanings, so even words are not necessary to experience such symbolism. I think a focus on language is normal for an LSD experience, but that language can be anything: It can be words, gestures, tapping, tones... anything that must be interpreted (even just physical objects) can be misinterpreted, and I suppose that this misinterpretation is somehow the cause of all discovered (i.e. accidental) symbolism.

Regarding the story about pointing: at the time, even I forgot what my original intent was. In psychedelic social situations, every person's mind is diverging from any given topic all the time, so I agree that it's incredibly hard to nail down any particular thought in your own mind, let alone in a conversation with others.

I think this simultaneous hyperactive desire to communicate and inability to communicate due to motor/mental inability is what results in certain "conversations" with "God"/reality. If we can invent a being intelligent enough to understand our divergent thoughts, then we can imagine a conversation with something that understands us despite our own inability to understand and communicate. When we are finally understood, we can stop overthinking, hence we can be at peace. I think this is only possible when our uncontrollable urge to communicate is satisfied by such a hypothetical being.

 

[woogyboogy]

I remember on my very first LSD experience, every thing I said or thought, I could immediately perceive some ambiguously pun weaved into the thought/words. Next day sadly I couldnt remember a single one of it. Still amazes me to this day..