DidMyTest said:
My problem consists mainly of two parts, the first is the voice in my head that tells me excuses for doing it. So I do stop mostly for one or two weeks, and then the next time when I'm drunk, argue with my girlfriend or s.th. else (which is a excuse) I start again.
In the past 12 months, I was able to quit cigarettes, alcohol, marijuana, and, with the help of methadone, prescription painkillers and heroin. I'm now almost done with my Methadone Maintenance Therapy and will be off of that too. So I'll tell you what worked for me:
If you're trying to quit cigs, I recommend that you stop drinking for a while. You need all the willpower you can get. Drinking while trying to quit cigs is like shooting yourself in the foot while you try to walk.
The second one is that most of my friends smoke and I also want to keep smoking ganja. But the problem is if I quit smoking I start to smoke really a lot of ganja (for the nicotine). That's why I don't buy it anymore just use it when friends got some.
Maybe stop hanging out with your using friends who could negatively influence you while you work on trying to quit. You need to eliminate distractions.
I truly want to be a none smoker, I know it's anoying for other people, it cost's money, it's bad for ur health and you are not fit etc. But still my mind tells me, hey today it's ok because you have this or that excuse.
Make a list of the reasons you want to quit, then meditate on this list every day, and visualize yourself as the person you want to be,
as if it's in the present.
Also I think I'm some sort of addcition guy. When I go out and drink I mostly spend all cash I got with me, so my strategy is just to take that with me, what I want to spend. I was sort of gambling addicted (luckyly I was very good and it did finance my life). But I quitted online gambling and do play only with friends anymore, because I was spending on average 6h per day on it. I'm kind of addicted to sex (I could have it 5 times a day, every day :d ), I think some of my relationships ended because of that. I'm addicted to shugar, if I have ten bars of choclate at home they are gone till the next day, the only thing I can do against that is to not buy it.
You need not only an unbending intent to stop addictions, but also emotional energy. Over-indulging in food, sex/masturbation, gambling, or any other addictive activity needs to stop. They will drain your emotional energy and sabotage your efforts.
You see my overall strategy is to limit myself to prevent doing s.th. But I'm afraid that I may get one day into serious trouble. E.g. getting addicted to s.th. harder because of a major life crisis or the wrong girlfriend, who knows. Ok I'm not that guy, who solves problems with substances and also I say no to new addictive substances like coke or heroin (which I got offered several times for free). Shure I know it would be great but I do know me. I think I've some serious nature to get addicted to things which provide pleasure.
So what I want to know, how I can gain the control while beeing in the situation. I mean this limiting stuff is better than nothing, but I want to belong to these people who take 100$ into a club and just use 20$ for example. That's also my problem of quitting smoking forever, because it's hard to limit yourself. I mean you can get a cigarette from everybody everywhere.
How about instead of trying to limit these addictions to alcohol, cigarettes, gambling, and sex, you
temporarily stop everything, one after another, starting with the least energy-draining behavior, then the next one, and the next one, etc.
“The trick is in what one emphasizes. We either make ourselves miserable, or we make ourselves happy. The amount of work is the same.”
-Carlos Castaneda
You see, once you're deep into your addictions/indulgences, it's very difficult to moderate (limit) them.
You need to reset yourself and start fresh. Once you have systematically eliminated your addictions, keep yourself busy with hobbies and healthy activities:
-Detoxify your body and your mind by reducing your meat, dairy, processed and junk food intake.
-Eat lots of organic fruits and mostly raw vegetables, drink lots of pure, unfluoridated water (spring or distilled) If distilled, be sure to add electrolytes.
-Exercise. Aerobic exercise can boost your body's natural endorphines and speed up the detoxification process. See my thread
HERE for a fun way to exercise without going anywhere.8)
-Try
Cold Showers to help stimulate endorphines and possibly relieve depression and boost immune function, as well as many other (potential) benefits.
-Connect to your Spirit or Higher Self by meditating and spending time in nature. Go for walks, read books, work on hobbies, spend time with family, pets, whatever brings you inner joy.
-Eliminate environmental distractions by staying away form negative-influencing people, and cleaning your living space.
-To prevent "relapse" into old ways when you're bored, work on
Gratitude. Gratitude is a powerful tool to use against boredom. When we are "bored" we basically have just temporarily forgotten to appreciate the simple things in life. Make a Gratitude List and write down everything you feel thankful for. Make it as detailed as possible and read it every night before you go to bed and every morning after you wake up. Maybe try to add one new thing every day. It's not necessary to thank anyone specifically, just be thankful.
“You have little time left, and none of it for crap. A fine state. I would say that the best of us always comes out when we are against the wall, when we feel the sword dangling overhead. Personally, I wouldn't have it any other way."
-Carlos Castaneda
You will feel like shit for a while, but it gets better!
Then, and only after you have reset your mind, detoxed, eliminated distractions, saved up emotional energy, and connected to yourself spiritually, you can decide if you want to start indulging in a little alcohol, or smoking a joint, or a little gambling, or reconnecting with your smoking/drinking friends. Now you are strong and have the available emotional energy to spend in small amounts if you choose to. But you may find at this point that you no longer have the desire to indulge in some of the things that brought you pleasure in the past.
"Pleasure is always derived from something outside you, whereas joy arises from within."
-Eckhart Tolle
You don't have to live the life of a nun or monk, but you have to understand the process of emotional energy saving, know yourself (your Self), and become at peace with your Self before you can "moderate" or "limit" addictions/indulgences after you're already deep into it.
Tap lightly from life.
Again, this is what has worked for me, and is what I believe, but only you know your own body and mind. Listen to the quiet, inner voice of intuition.
I hope this helps you (and anyone else who is struggling with addictions).
I wish you peace and happiness.
