The clown carnival party took a bad turn today

[Felnik]

I hate to be a downer but my trip took a very disturbing turn in a big way today.
I'm just documenting what I experienced you can draw your own conclusions.

It was a beautiful spring day and things were going along in the usual manner. After a few trips and a short break I decided to go in once more. low dose mushrooms in the mix with sublingual caapi extract. The mushrooms were a nice steady buzz and I could feel the caapi. One last blast started typically enough. Its the usual scene I've seen many many times,
familiar visuals and a predictable storyline. I averted my attention from it for a few seconds opening my eyes as it still played out. I closed my eyes once again, as it was ending I caught a view of a very intense looking thing like a hyperdimentional wasp thing. I've encountered this thing in the past but never like this.
Right at that moment it slipped into my body and put me on like suit. I could feel this thing literally slide into my entire body and throughout my nervous system, in my legs, in my arms all over. At that point my eyesight got very acute and sharp and I felt like some kind of cyborg like Arnold Schwarzenegger in Terminator. there was more that I don't even want to talk about. I tried not to panic and packed up my stuff and started hiking out. I was freaking because I could feel this thing in my body as I walked, It was there for sure.
Luckily I called a friend on the cell. Just hearing his voice calmed me down right away, as we talked and as I walked thankfully the feeling of this thing eventually started to wear off.

I'm taking a long possibly permanent break after this one, this really was too much.
It was scary on e very deep level and the implications of it if taken literally are quite troubling to me.
I might suggest to always be careful and pay attention at all times. never get lulled into the idea that its all love and candy. There are things that lurk in the shadows of hyperspace that are not good at all.
Its the after party you have to watch out for.

 

[DreaMTripper]

I hate to be a downer but my trip took a very disturbing turn in a big way today.
I'm just documenting what I experienced you can draw your own conclusions.

It was a beautiful spring day and things were going along in the usual manner. After a few trips and a short break I decided to go in once more. low dose mushrooms in the mix with sublingual caapi extract. The mushrooms were a nice steady buzz and I could feel the caapi. One last blast started typically enough. Its the usual scene I've seen many many times,
familiar visuals and a predictable storyline. I averted my attention from it for a few seconds opening my eyes as it still played out. I closed my eyes once again, as it was ending I caught a view of a very intense looking thing like a hyperdimentional wasp thing. I've encountered this thing in the past but never like this.
Right at that moment it slipped into my body and put me on like suit. I could feel this thing literally slide into my entire body and throughout my nervous system, in my legs, in my arms all over. At that point my eyesight got very acute and sharp and I felt like some kind of cyborg like Arnold Schwarzenegger in Terminator. there was more that I don't even want to talk about. I tried not to panic and packed up my stuff and started hiking out. I was freaking because I could feel this thing in my body as I walked, It was there for sure.
Luckily I called a friend on the cell. Just hearing his voice calmed me down right away, as we talked and as I walked thankfully the feeling of this thing eventually started to wear off.

I'm taking a long possibly permanent break after this one, this really was too much.
It was scary on e very deep level and the implications of it if taken literally are quite troubling to me.
I might suggest to always be careful and pay attention at all times. never get lulled into the idea that its all love and candy. There are things that lurk in the shadows of hyperspace that are not good at all.
Its the after party you have to watch out for.

Seems you may have needed a lesson in moderation (first part in bold) and got a thorough slapping and maybe you were taking this powerful psychedelic too casually as in the second part in bold.
Are you afraid of wasps? Were there many around at the time or shortly beforehand? What are the implications you are afraid of really?
Theres always a relevant message in their somewhere and its interesting to compare perspectives as I remember global saying he morphed into something but had a great time, maybe a better setting wouldve had you flying through the air as a wasp?
Come to think of it its possible you were actually bitten by an insect and the feelings you had were the poison??

Just been reading your previous reports, nicely written amazing experiences!

 

[Jees]

Good suggestions DreamT. :?

I lumber on this (absolutely not new) idea that we are nothing but a suit, all the time actually but overlooked, and the molecules revealing this. We think to have personality and abilities but actually it's the riders credits, whether they are more embedded or short visiting.

Anyway, I could not determine that the wasp itself had a negative nature, or was it the confrontation amplitude (aside from negative or positive) to be out of charts?

 

[Felnik]

My dose range was not as wreck less or excessive as my post may seem. I'm talking about a small dose range. The caapi
extract may have been slightly higher than normal and I may
have exceeded my normal dose by one hit . That's where it went wrong . I know better too , up and til that last one everything was going really nicely actually . I was careless
and was not paying attention that's bad.

I used wasp for lack of a better description no attachment to wasp in the literal sense . Insectoid might
be a better description .

Since we don't know what we're actually dealing
with in this hyperspace realm I can only go by my instincts
based on experience. I can reflect and soften it and get ethereal and mystical about it sure . But I can tell you
without a doubt this thing was bad news all around . It was
cold and aggressive on a very scary level. I have enough
experience with this stuff to recognize a bad thing .
This was bad bad bad .

 

[Felnik]

In reflecting on this experience I think I know what
was most disturbing . There was a distinct feeling
for short duration that I was being controlled by some
outside force. It was aggressive and felt very stealthy
like a highly advanced technology of some kind. It did
not feel friendly as in we come in peace type of thing .
I felt like part of some kind of experiment where my humanness was irrelevant .

I am fully aware that we're dealing with a powerful
psychoactive compound here capable of all kinds of perceptual weirdness. So everything must be taken in that context. That being said I think it's time for me to hang up the phone
for a good long while . It feels like a very long integration is in order for sure . This one really crossed the line for me

 

[○]

I know for me, many times that i've taken reasonable doses of mushrooms, especially when in complete silence, things have turned to be very symbiotic/parasitic at times. When I use the word parasitic I don't mean it in any negative sort of sense; it tends to be these moments that come and go through the entirety of the mushroom experience; a reciprocation of sorts, a constant give and take; which sometimes ..'more is taken, than is given'. Forms can become 110% apparent during these moments; my CEV field twisting, turning, stretching into various appearances/beings, many times taking the form of insectoid, or even a scaled appearance. All the while as this is going on, i've had moments where it felt as if these energies/beings were seeping into my being, one breath at a times, working their way in, sometimes slowly..sometimes abruptly. These encounters are pretty short lived, but they are very powerful. With smoked changa/DMT i've gotten very similar (although not very often), but typically at that level of dissolution, everything is coming on so abruptly, that if they come... they're coming, whether I like it or not

Also, getting copacetic with these experiences, lending yourself to start thinking "oh, same old, here we go..etc etc", these experiences have ways of flipping the table over when we least expect it and dig the nails in deep. As I was talking with you last night, we mentioned breaks. These experiences, especially smoked DMT, ime tend to heavily favor long periods of integration. I find if I go back sooner than id planned, the chances of me being womped on are quite a bit higher.

Your correct though in saying that it's not all 'love and candy' - probably the strongest statement here. Hyperspace embraces all forms - the angelics, the tricksters, the outkcasts, darker forces, etc; they're all embedded within, part and parcel. They all have their place, as do we and everything else in this existence. One moment of bliss and union can flip script the next second, leading into being ripped apart, operated on, and spit back out., being drug through intensely uncomfortable moments. Nothing is concrete, everything leads into everything else, sometimes directly ..sometimes indirectly.

Take some time away, ..this experience isn't going anywhere. Take care of yourself.

And your absolutely correct - we DONT know what we're dealing with; but also in knowing that ..try not to get too hung up by what happened and don't fall into the trap of trying to box these experiences into any specifics- because ultimately everyone experiences and 'reacts' differently to these things, all forming a variance on opinions, none of which are 'the case'. We simply don't know what is going on, and as you said - should exercise a healthy amount of caution when dealing with the other side.

It's great that you wrote about this though. That in itself is a major +; helps you assimilate these feelings/thought/emotions into your everyday life.

Take care

 

[Felnik]

Tatt great constructive stuff there I thank you . And thanks
for chatting with me it helped a lot I was still pretty freaked
out when we talked .I agree to stay open to all possibilities and I try not
to get stuck on one set theory . I realize that after many years
of experimenting with this eventually you stear your boat
into some really uncharted waters . This is where a good shamanic practice and longer breaks really pays off.

 

[Sky Motion]

You trip a lot my friend, bound to happen once in a while..tis the nature of the experience.

Creepy, and violating. I would be just as freaked out if not more..

I remember my FIRST breakthrough ever I woke up on a stone table being "inspected" or "operated" upon by these out of vision grey alien creatures. They asked me if I thought this was just a game..

Utmost respect..always!!

 

[DreaMTripper]

On reflection my post wasnt on the whole very helpful or constructive, I hope your integration is going well Felnik.

 

[Felnik]

I may have figured out something interesting .
I examined the changa blend I was rocking when
this particular experience happened and realized
That it was an experimental blend of caapi leaf and
potent autumn olive 10x or more . On that day
I thought it was just plain caapi leaf . It has no Spice
In it that's always carefully added in the moment .

I tried this blend minus the spice and it's super
Aggressive , weird and really strong. It has a separate
Trippy high all to itself . Like an extreme harmine rush
of some kind. I recognized it right away. I've had this before
and that's why I remember shelving this blend in the first place . it got in the
mix by mistake and explains alot.

 

[Jees]

...I tried this blend minus the spice and it's super
Aggressive , weird and really strong...

Felnik, you had "promising" and "real potential" experiences with combining autumn olive + spice, right? Where did it go wrong, the combination with caapi?

Hard to think of a plant spirit clash between caapi and russian olive (like a negative synergy). Maybe its a plain ole harmala whip. One of my wildest and hard experiences were on just syrian rue only. Dose high enough and one really gets a treat to stay away from for a long time. Not me, but insectoids or stuff alike are mentioned on high dosages of harmalas only. Add spice as a magnifier factor 10.000 and I can't imagine the rest.

 

[Felnik]

Yes I'm thinking high dose of harmalas tipped the balance
Combination of sublingual caapi extract then the olive
on top of that really sent me to crazy land for a few minutes .
Apparently the olive blend is really strong and must be loaded
with a cocktail of harmine components. Still need to get a mass spec analysis on this stuff at some point.
I know the harmine levels were high in my body because it
Kicked in a small amount of mushrooms wildly all of a sudden
earlier on that day. The insectoid thing is intense alright wow .