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Too afraid to try again :(

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Eternal_LVX

Eternal_LVX

Rising Star
Maybe I'm being a coward but, after last night's trip, I'm not sure I want to smoke spice again. It was my first trip and I guess I had all this shit built up in my head about how it was going to be. The body high was almost too intense to want to do again. It really scared the hell out of me. The smoke was harsh and smelled weird. someone told me that it might be because I burned the spice. If I don't burn the spice, will I still have that same intense body feeling? I'm wondering if I will have different experiences each time or if it will just be that same uncomfortable feeling? Granted, it wasn't all bad. I felt like I met the spirit of the plant but it was almost too powerful to be around. Damn, I want to see the beauty that everyone keeps talking about.
 
i went through this exact thing, had the same question about burning it.

i think how its vaped makes a difference.

i used to worry about that too, the body load.

its not always going to be like that, its always different.

maybe dont take as much and work on your technique.

the path of the molecule isn't an easy one.

it just takes getting used to, if your committed and patient you will be rewarded.

much love and positive energy
 
I know how you feel lol. My first time felt like an alien punched me in the face with all this knowledge at once and the body high was such a rush, felt like i was being lifted out of my body at unrealistic speeds. Dont consider yourself a coward, it was only your first time. I know your kind of afraid to do it again, but let me assure you that everything will be ok. If your nervous try to get you heart rate to a low and steady level. What i do when I'm nervous is sit in a meditative stance and do some breathing techniques until I am as calm as I can possibly be. If you do it again make sure that you try your hardest not to put your flame directly on it try and heat it up from a distance and make sure you hold it in for at least 10 seconds I know it smells and tastes funky but you got to do this.

May your next journey be an enlighten one :)
 
For me it is always frightening but very rewarding. I have no unpleasant body high though, as I have no sense of my body. It sounds like your having trouble with your technique, I know I did for quite a while! How did you smoke it?
 
It takes a while to get a basic understanding of this stuff.
I went through a lot of trial and error in the beginning .
Keep reading about vaping techniques.

Work at smaller dose levels , use some kind of carrier herb
I use mullien it mellows the smoke out alot. There are many options for
Herbs to use.


You can adjust and adapt to a lot of the physical effects
As crazy as that sounds . There will be some trial and error its normal.
You've come this far .....i say give it a fair shot .

The power is something else . Minimize expectations work on your breathing.
Start small work up . Don't panic stay cool . work on that it helps .
Set and setting is everything .
It's worth it
Good luck
 
I have been having the same troubles, but I keep pressing on. I'm improving my technique and getting used to these feelings. I know it will be worth it to achieve breakthrough. Good luck!
 
What was your dose and what did you vape it out of? In the beginning I didnt like low doses so I hesitate saying this seeing as how this was your first experience but ill say it anyway, maybe try a lower dose and see how that treats you.
 
View it with a sense of Zen, meditate before you go into the trip. Entering the trip is like being perched over a big wave, at the top you feel almost scared and out of control, but as soon as you start riding it all seems so simple yet amazing. Trust in your subconscious's ability to guide you.
 
I would suggest experimenting with infused herb/changa, smoking small amounts of that to start with, and going from there. Just a completely different kettle of fish to smoking freebase spice alone, in my experience anyway.
 
Im so sorry Eternal, my first time was no more than a week ago and i burnt it as well, the smell alone now kinda grosses me out but i think i lucked out by using so much, i felt as if BECAUSE it was so intense that it was better to just let it take its course and not fight what it wanted to happen. I may not be as experienced as these fine people but i can relate as far as the first time goes, to some extent. keep truckin
 
Thank you all so much for your encouragement and telling me to press on. I don't know why I got so frightened. It was very humbling. I felt like the entity I saw was saying, "Did you think dying would be so easy?" haha
I think because I didn't measure my dose properly and it was my first time, I have a lot of room for improvement as someone said on here. I think I'm going to smoke very small amounts to get use to the smell/taste and body feeling. I will build my way up to a breakthough. I have plenty of spice so I'm just going to take it very slow and get use to it. My first trip was so new! I felt like I got shook to my core. I got awakened by a slap in the face or a splash of cold water! haha Thanks again everyone. Keep the advice coming as this is helpful to all the newbies like me.
 
look into changa.

it makes a lot of difference when you have the ability to ease yourself into it a bit more. in my case the body load mellowed out a bit as well.

there is no need to rush into trying it again though.. the spice isn't going anywhere so take a bit of time and make sure you are comfortable before trying it again.
 
gammagore said:
I will always predose, always. .
Click to expand...


Will a predose prevent a break through if thats what im looking for at the time? What i mean to say is that, is there a tolerance threshold for spice and time in between which its administered?
 
Eternal_LVX said:
Maybe I'm being a coward but, after last night's trip, I'm not sure I want to smoke spice again. It was my first trip and I guess I had all this shit built up in my head about how it was going to be. The body high was almost too intense to want to do again. It really scared the hell out of me. The smoke was harsh and smelled weird. someone told me that it might be because I burned the spice. If I don't burn the spice, will I still have that same intense body feeling? I'm wondering if I will have different experiences each time or if it will just be that same uncomfortable feeling? Granted, it wasn't all bad. I felt like I met the spirit of the plant but it was almost too powerful to be around. Damn, I want to see the beauty that everyone keeps talking about.
Click to expand...

Bob is with you - every time he hits it, he experiences a slight terror at the apparent physical effect. Bob cannot tell if there are any _real_ physical effects, or if (and as he and I suspect) the ego-blasting "tearing away" of his point of perception from "this world" just causes him to _feel_ like he's being shoved towards some sort of precipice. But it is a scary feeling. Bob of course overcomes it with will and continues on.

And that is what you must do. You are getting to where Bob gets after one hit. When you have that scary feeling and everything seems "wrong", just trust it and hit it again. Hard. You will soon forget your fear as you are launched into the bosom of the Infinite and bask in Its glory.

H.
 
hoppah said:
Eternal_LVX said:
Maybe I'm being a coward but, after last night's trip, I'm not sure I want to smoke spice again. It was my first trip and I guess I had all this shit built up in my head about how it was going to be. The body high was almost too intense to want to do again. It really scared the hell out of me. The smoke was harsh and smelled weird. someone told me that it might be because I burned the spice. If I don't burn the spice, will I still have that same intense body feeling? I'm wondering if I will have different experiences each time or if it will just be that same uncomfortable feeling? Granted, it wasn't all bad. I felt like I met the spirit of the plant but it was almost too powerful to be around. Damn, I want to see the beauty that everyone keeps talking about.
Click to expand...

Bob is with you - every time he hits it, he experiences a slight terror at the apparent physical effect. Bob cannot tell if there are any _real_ physical effects, or if (and as he and I suspect) the ego-blasting "tearing away" of his point of perception from "this world" just causes him to _feel_ like he's being shoved towards some sort of precipice. But it is a scary feeling. Bob of course overcomes it with will and continues on.

And that is what you must do. You are getting to where Bob gets after one hit. When you have that scary feeling and everything seems "wrong", just trust it and hit it again. Hard. You will soon forget your fear as you are launched into the bosom of the Infinite and bask in Its glory.

H.
Click to expand...

You overcome the fear by repetition?

After first hit, I always take a step back; "What am i actually doing?" "What is going to happen?" "Will i be okay?" "Am i running from a problem?"...
This is an unpleasant mood that pops out when I take the first hit. Then I hold my breath for a good 7seconds. I feel stunned, the "uncomfortable feeling" in my chest is overpowering and it doesn't leave quick enough. But I try a second hit , which often fails because I'm too messed up&worried to take another hit the right way. Then I get incredibly frustrated about myself, my bottle and my technique for ,again, not working. And then I have no choice to wait my trip out, because I have messed up the launch and my body feels very sick and weak. (Do I give up too fast?) I'm not able to maintain a happy feeling during the launch.

I've got a strong need that wants to predict everything, that wants to be assured of what's going to happen and how other people want me to behave.
If i don't know what I'll be up against, I usually don't participate.
There has to be a connection and I want to solve both at the same time. 1 The fear of tripping 2 Me trying to have 100% control on my future (It's on a higher level, so its not only a need to control myself, which is normal, but my surroundings and what will happen to me and my feelings)

This is the only barrier between me and dmt, and i deeply want to overcome it and see it's true colors.
 
Ok everyone. I've decided to try it again. I'm only going to try a very small amount just to start getting use to the taste of the smoke and maybe some of the onset effects. I just decided that being afraid is stupid. A lot of my pre-launch anxiety is gone because all the hype is out of the way. Did anyone else notice that? There's all this hype about it and I think that creates a lot of tension. Another thing I thought about was cannabis smoking. I know a lot of people that get paranoid and panic off some weed and I didn't get it. Then I remembered when I first started doing it and my tolerance was really low and the same thing happened to me. Maybe it just takes some getting use to just like with cannabis, coffee, cigs, or alcohol. I haven't been doing a lot of psychedelics lately so I think it just shocked me! haha
 
^ There's always a touch of fear and respect when I have my spice loaded up and ready to go. It does get easier, but even after countless launches (and countless rough rides) the fear is there.

For me, it's about pushing through the fear. The terror subsides, but I think the fear is just a healthy respect for something greater than ourselves.
 
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