I don't know if this will help at all, but I know 2 people personally who were severely depressed (one has a combo of depression/anxiety) and they are doing very well today.
The first one is M (no, not me): Her depression stemmed from an obvious source. Her mom was a huge party girl when M was very young and M ended up in some very dangerous situations, namely her mother's male friends molesting her. When M became a teenager her mother cleaned up her act, but they never received any sort of counseling together. M was FULL of anger and hostility, which was buried beneath her very kind, benign personality. I was M's manager at work and noticed the hostility toward her mother. M moved in with me for a few months while waiting for her new apt. and I witnessed firsthand just how terrible depression can be; she hardly slept and was always tired, therefore she hardly left her bed on her days off and was always begging me to allow her to nap at work, which I did. She stopped eating and became anorexic. I finally suggested that she cut off all contact with her mom bc being around her seemed to set her off. She did, and it helped her a lot. She eventually quit her job at our work (she hated it, another contributor to her depression). She got a job at a yoga studio as a receptionist as she loves yoga. This job change helped her tremendously. She changed all of the things that contributed to or caused her depression and she's doing very well today.
Person # 2 is P. She seemed very happy and well adjusted, then the depression hit her out of nowhere in her mid 40s. The only thing she really complained about before that was not having a boyfriend, and she is a very beautiful and talented woman, she just hardly ever went out and therefore never met guys, and was too picky about the ones who liked her. She was divorced from a man she adored in the 80s and never quite got over it. Then some people in her family fell ill who lived in AZ. She packed up her house to rent it out, moved to AZ, absolutely hated it and it dawned on her right then how good her life in LA had been. After a few months taking care of sick people in a very conservative city in AZ she realized just how depressing life could be. She helped her family members heal and hightailed it back to LA. In the height of her depression she had been bedridden. Now she occasionally takes an anti anxiety pill if she wakes up and feels it's going to be a rough day, but generally she is great.
I'm no doctor, I don't know the causes of depression. But I've seen people fall into a rut and develop depression. I think we as humans are the only species who have that luxury, every other species is too busy fighting for food, shelter, water and survival to ever fall into a rut.
I struggled with mild depression growing up, I had a hard time as a child bc of my crazy and often neglectful family. I grew out of it in my late 20s when it occurred to me that those things I experienced as a kid didn't even exist anywhere outside my head anymore. That I had so much to be grateful for: good health, all of my limbs, basic civil rights, food, clean water, shelter, a job, a car, the list goes on. When I feel myself starting to feel that way now I change my surroundings. When work pisses me off I say "eff it" and jump on my bike (I am lucky to telecommute). When my husband drives me nuts I say "eff it" and walk to my local for a drinkie with the nutty old bar flies who always make me laugh. As a kid I allowed people to push me around, now I'm very assertive without being aggressive, I do not allow people to push my buttons. We have more power in our minds than most are aware of and can at the very least change our current mood.
The best of luck to you, from one human to another I sincerely hope you get through this. I don't want to sound like the answer is so simple, I just wanted to offer a new perspective and share what I've personally witnessed and experienced. The answers you seek may or may not come in the form a drug, psychedelic or otherwise.
