jbark said:
NEVER ADMINISTER DMT TO ANYONE WHO IS SUICIDAL.
Get them professional psychological help, immediately - please do not trifle with this.
Good luck,
JBArk
original post edited to hopefully not sound as if I'm recommending anything to anyone.as per JBs response, do not conflate thispost with a suggestion to simply do psychedelics if you are suicidal. Thisis only my experience
In general, yes. Don't f!!! aroundwith this.
HOWEVER...
Suicidal ideation or general suicidality may be addressed with psychedelics yes. I am working on my own memoir of using powerful transformative psychedelic experience to catalyze recovery from major depression co-occurring with serious addiction. I feel that in my case, an experiential awareness of something greater than myself that at the same time i am an intrinsic part of, a knowledge not a belief, allowed me to gain the "higher power" referred to by Bill W in his creation of the twelve steps. While i passionately disagree with much of that program and the way it is run, this is something that had eluded me and that lack of belonging allowed me to be ultimately self destructive, being without connection in the world.
That said, the integration of that experience was probably the longest and hardest road i ever attempted to travel, with no signs or dividing lines, as the song goes. While the possibility of suicide was definitely diminished from my experimentation with intentional tripping, it was not fully erased.
My pathin the years since has finally led to a place of peace and fulfillment but it took a long time to get here and was fraught with pain, suffering, misguided steps and relapse.
I feel that a lot of the psychedelic movement is concerned with the betterment of wellness rather than actual healing. Although the word healing and medicine is used to refer to ceremony and substances, it is most often a nebulous termthat seems to have more connotations with new-ageism and seeking authority than anything else. It is also elitist, composed primarily of a racially and economically priveleleged group of white AmeroEuropean professionals.
In my state there is a potential bill in the works that sets up a new professional class of therapists licensed as the sole providers of psilocybin. This ensures that they and they alone will claim the ability to give this substance. The general thinking is that if it were generally legal that people would not have the innate ability to handle a psychedelic without intervention and guidance. Tell that to the 15 year old me who couldn't deal with school but could an eigth of shrooms just fine.
Although there are an increasing number of professionals flirting with ethical guidelines and their own licensure to provide so called integration services there are no established protocols and it seems primarily motivated to increases revenue flow for these people through the creation of an entirely new professional class who work in concert with questionable providers.
So where does this leave a person struggling with these deadly feelings who has worked to alleviate them to no avail through conventional methods and wishes to try this modality? Well, unless you're comfortable putting your well being into the hands of one of these practitioners, let's hope that you are a powerfully strong minded, willful, wise and intelligent person. It takes a lot of work to put all those pieces back together when you've blown your self apart. The risk of ending up worse than you started is simply to great. I personally do not feel that anything other than a total dissolution of self within a peak experience would be helpful and that could be simply to much to handle. I'm more lucky than any of those qualities i listed to come out on top. And my integration path from one experience currently sits at six years and counting so it's not a quick easy fix.
At the risk of sounding contradictory, if you are going to attempt this, my advice to you would be to find a therapist or at least someone you deeply trust to discuss your intention and to talk about it afterwards. I just disagree with the setting up of a out of reach process for betterment that can't be accessed by people on the fringes of society or marginalized populations that arguably need the most healing and have the greatest potential forincreased social contribution. I do not disagree with the concept of talk therapy however, it was an integral part of my process that has allowed greater rapidity of gain in it. If you have private or state insurance this could be possible without a out of pocket expense.
If you are suicidal, don't try to go it alone, join a support group perhapsto see that you aren't so alone. Volunteer to help someone with less than you. Get out of you.
If you do take the psychedelic route, continue to research. Personally i do not feel that n,n DMT is a good candidate. It tends to be loud, bright and confounding. You may come out of breakthrough more traumatized and most likely more confused. The substance to catalyze recovery is 5meoDMT because of its ability to replicate an NDE almost perfectly according to literature on that subject. The experience with death allowed and letting go granted me peace and understanding in a way i could never extricate from a DMT trip.
And if you are intent on doing this, be a part of this community, this is where i learned to integrate.
Above all, peace and be good to you. I hate to use such a cliche at the risk of sounding trite, but IT DOES GET BETTER!
:thumb_up:
