Long term changes - questions for experienced travelers

[murklan]

Hi.

I've written some of this in other threads around the board but here I'd like to do a summary and ask some questions.

I've used DMT for around two years. Around every week apart for some month in summers. Started with changa and then did my own extractions for enhanced leafs in a pipe. This was always together with extracted harmalas from syrian sue. First sublingual (20-50 mg) then orally (150-230mg). Then I didn't want to inhale so much smoke so I looked up vaporizing and got a Vapor Genie Glass Bat that I used with a ethanol candle. That worked well, but I got concerns about breathing in the flame directly (cant get pure 96% ethanol here) and that I felt something was not good for my lungs.

About the same time I have noticed that the trips were changing in character. Not much of the DMT colors and strange worlds, the fractals and hyper dimensional jumps. More unclear, muddy. But still most of the times deeply personal and sometimes emotional. And it did loose the constraints of my thinking a lot within the journey. That's good.

I now use a electric hot air gun blowing into the VG Glass Bat. The vapors are really light but I think I get at least most of it in my lungs. I works well together with the harmalas so I don't have to take it al in at once.

But lately I almost only get a really drugged feeling and not very psychedelic (in a classic sense). It's powerful but feels more like I'm taking some other hard drug, like I imagine heroin (never taken it). After taking harmalas and waiting 2h or sublingual and 10 min. waiting I redose DMT during some hours (yesterday I did 5 * 20-30 mg) and get immersed... but only in myself. It's a good feeling at the moment, but at the same time I feel like it's parts that are really missing. The 'spirit' part of the spirit molecule is missing.

I love my harmalas but I guess I have to give the spice a try on its own and see if I somehow 'lost the connection'. If doing it every week is to much.

What are your experiences, you who have been using it for years? How has it changed, or has it? And what are your thought about my experiences, that it now feels more like a dopamine high (I imagine).

Glad for your thoughts and experiences.

 

[bismillah]

In my experience, if it stops showing you stuff, it's because you need to sit back and appreciate what it's already shown you. Every week is pretty often. Is having a profound religious experience every week sustainable?

 

[Voidmatrix]

This thread may be helpful for you

As for me, I use DMT about once a week also. I think the difference between us is that I rarely breakthrough. Typically when it occurs for me it's either an accident or my part or "they" really "wanted me."

The experience gets weirder with time for me. I tend to enjoy it and glean what I need to regardless of imagery. I have had more "dark" imagery lately that has been pretty engaging and allowing me to learn about myself in a different way by observing my immediate responses to bearing witness.

It sounds like it has become a more somatic experience with you over time which is also something I've experienced. Just a different facet of experience. Something to be explored. As it is now, our bodies are intimate to us (it's my temple), so it only benefits us to be as aware of the body as we are our spirits and minds.

One love

 

[murklan]

Thank you both of you.

bismillah:
I agree to have a 'profound religious experience every week' would probably be to much for most of us (at least those of us that are not aiming for beeing full time oracles or prophets). That said, I have not in my own terms ever had a profound religious experience with DMT. So far. It's also not what I'm looking or striving for, at least that I'm aware of.

What I'm concerned and/or curious for is how the experiences and feelings has changed over time. The higher level of awe and complexity that used to be a part of it.

Voidmatrix:
Thank you, I will read that thread!
I also rarely breakthrought... but now when thinking of I now remember that yesterday before the more 'druggy' part I was in a breakthrough for quite some time.. Of some kind. Or it was more like an internal VR-experience. Total immersion, but somehow without much magic or depth. I was more lite 'ok, now I have a world inside me, and it feels quite ordinary'. In itself a strange notion. It IS amazing what we can create (or vising depending on ones belief).

Good to read about your way to be thank full and to learn from what you get. I guess I'm getting a bit worried mostly. I feel mentally good, most of the time. Are now also vaping less cannabis, from a bit every night (apart from the nights journey with DMT) to about two evening in a week. I was not experiencing much negative aspects of my usage (grow myself or get from friends that are doing it) but noticed that I slept worse when I didn't have it. And that it somehow affected the days in subtle ways. So I'm trying to se what difference this will make.

Somatic, yes. I would like to get more into tune with my body. My lungs feels not really good lately. Perhaps covid, dry indoor winter air or something else...

 

[Tomtegubbe]

Do you take ayahuasca/pharmahuasca? I find it easier to navigate in the long run since you have more time to get accustomed to the experience and it's easier to set your intention. The muddy feeling may be connected to having a muddy intention.

 

[bismillah]

My observation has always been that "less is more" holds true. Awe is an emotion that depends on novelty and revelation. I suppose it's natural that your awe has subsided.

 

[murklan]

Do you take ayahuasca/pharmahuasca? I find it easier to navigate in the long run since you have more time to get accustomed to the experience and it's easier to set your intention. The muddy feeling may be connected to having a muddy intention.

Yes I've dabbled with pharmahuasca a bit. But I really didn't get it to work. It effected me and created a nice steady ground level, but I'd still have to vape a bit on the top to really let go. I could have taken more but it was a bit of work to create (furamate). But perhaps I could have used FB instead? And skip the conversion. Might try that...
And the mud, yes perhaps my intentions. I don't have specific goals but wishes, openings and curiosities.

My observation has always been that "less is more" holds true. Awe is an emotion that depends on novelty and revelation. I suppose it's natural that your awe has subsided.

Yes I totally agree. I don't think its good trying to achieve awe to often (at least not in this way).

 

[Voidmatrix]

Voidmatrix:
Thank you, I will read that thread!
I also rarely breakthrought... but now when thinking of I now remember that yesterday before the more 'druggy' part I was in a breakthrough for quite some time.. Of some kind. Or it was more like an internal VR-experience. Total immersion, but somehow without much magic or depth. I was more lite 'ok, now I have a world inside me, and it feels quite ordinary'. In itself a strange notion. It IS amazing what we can create (or vising depending on ones belief).

Good to read about your way to be thank full and to learn from what you get. I guess I'm getting a bit worried mostly. I feel mentally good, most of the time. Are now also vaping less cannabis, from a bit every night (apart from the nights journey with DMT) to about two evening in a week. I was not experiencing much negative aspects of my usage (grow myself or get from friends that are doing it) but noticed that I slept worse when I didn't have it. And that it somehow affected the days in subtle ways. So I'm trying to se what difference this will make.

Somatic, yes. I would like to get more into tune with my body. My lungs feels not really good lately. Perhaps covid, dry indoor winter air or something else...

There could be a variety of things that can cause lung discomfort and distress. With respect to DMT, it is mildly caustic. I have noticed that after some journeys I have a slight cough, but I will often drink a little elderberry syrup after and then everything is fine. Echinacea, goldenseal, and nettleleaf are all natural supplements with respiratory benefits.

Cannabis is similar for me, though I have had sleep troubles since childhood. Have you tried any kinds of tea blends, CBD, or CBN? Lemon balm, Ashwagandha, and Blue Lotus of relaxing and sedating effects. I will sometimes take one of those with my other nightly sleep supplements.

DMT always has something new to show you. I never know whether the experience will be directed internally or externally. Where you are now could possibly be the present phase of your journey. Keep searching. You'll find things inside that you couldn't have imagined were there. :twisted:

One love