Nightmare on DMT

[Hellion]

Was really excited to try my first visit to the other realms via DMT. Went out and bought a Volcano Vape just for it. Loaded 50mg (As I wanted to breakthrough the first time) set to 280F, loaded the bag enough for 2 huge breaths. Took my first big breath, was going to hold it in a lot longer but my body said "OH HELL NO" and let it out about 20 seconds as I my body felt like it was about to freak out.

At this point I figured oh my god here it is, but I wanted to break through so tried to get in what I could for what was still in the bag. About 5 seconds more of holding my breath my heart was racing faster and harder than I thought possible. Every pore of my body was screaming in terror as I continued to be wide awake. I tried to meditate as I lay there. With eyes closed the backdrop looked nothing more than a wall broken down into tiny diamond pattern, not visually clear, not moving, nothing fascinating at all.

Through all this my body and mind continued to scream in terror, visuals were not changing at all. I was like F*** this, there is no way this is what this is supposed to feel like as it was like a hell within a hell.

So, maybe a minute has passed by now and i'm having a hard time breathing, every pore of my body is still screaming for this to stop. I realize I have about 5-10 more minutes of this to go and stand up to get some air as the air in the room felt really thick. I noticed a spider by my ac vent turned green blue and looked like a bug, i'm looking around in complete agony hoping to at least see some cool stuff as I knew It wouldn't last long. The rest of this crap is going down the toilet is what I was thinking.

So that was about 8pm last night. It's 12 noon the next day and my chest feels a little tight still for some reason as I feel I still am short on a complete breath.

I was SO looking forward to many journeys on this stuff as well as trying Aya but after this (as of right now anyway) I don't even want to touch weed ever again. And i'll only do weed once a month for conscious exploration as that is all it usually takes for me.

It was the most horrific 10-15 minutes of my life. Unlike most people, my body did not know what to do with this stuff. I'm so disappointed. Kinda messed up my spiritual path, for now at least. I didn't trash it yet. But I don't know if I could grow the balls to do even 5mg again. And i'm a 44 year old tough guy that isn't afraid of anything or anyone.

I'd love to hear some input on this but for being in the Welcome discussion thread it will probably just get lost.

Peace,
Mike

 

[rach33]

I'm not very experienced in this had my first go last night, but do you think you had too much in one go given it was ur first time? What frame of mind were u in before hand?

 

[Hellion]

I was thinking I had too much at first, but out of the 50gm there was still quite a bit left in the bag that I didn't get on the second breath.

My wife was out, had the house nice and quiet, took a shower, meditated first, laid down in my bed, meditated right before loading the vape into the bag. I thought this was going to be the best experience of my life so tried to make everything perfect before hand.

This was my first try.

 

[MadPlanter]

Sorry to hear of your bad experience. Hopefully you can make it through the terror you experienced on not be put off your spiritual path. Hopefully you can try it again someday and undo your first memory with DMT. If you cannot move past it enough to try it again there are many ways to spiritual understanding than the use of psychoactive substances. Spirituality is the way to go even if DMT offers you nothing and/or not what your looking for. Please don't put others off of trying DMT if their path leads them that way as it does help many as you know. It would be best to give them a stern warning from your own experience that it can be equally as bad as it can be good be sure you want to even take the risk.

Peace and be well!

 

[rach33]

I had some really good music playing in the background. Really chilled stuff. Why don't you try 20mg and work up. Keep trying as my first go was very profound and considering it was my first go a lot happened. I did this with my boyfriend about 20-30mg.

I had two go's two hours apart. The first go was amazing but the,second time I recalled a painful time in my life and cried for a solid hour. However this hasn't put me off. Have another go

 

[Pestile]

I'm sorry you had to experience that. It must have felt really bad.

I also vape on a Volcano. My first hit was about 40mg at 320°F and I felt a real discomfort too. But I think that was due to inexperience and not really doing it right.
I thought "this can't be right" and I loaded 60mg at 355°F, thinking that I just had to break through. I had to.
I loaded it up and filled the bag to what would amount to two hits, inhaled the vapor and kept it in for 15-20 seconds both times. It was the right decision I made.
It didn't feel the same way, it was like I did not have the option of feeling the discomfort of the first experience and it was very beautiful and I am so glad I didn't back out after the first try.

I wouldn't say I felt the same terror as you, but I did feel like it was a mistake to try this molecule and it felt dark and unpleasant.

But the best thing I could have done was load some more and really focus on taking the right size hit and keeping it inside for the right amount of time.

I wont tell you to do anything, but I had the greatest experience breaking through. So much was revealed to me and I feel very blessed for that experience.

 

[Hellion]

I was planning on my second ever shroom experience last night before getting a hold of my Volcano (Which is now in storage). I wish I would have went for the shrooms.
Last shroom experience was with my wife about 14 years ago. I remember it being very profound In the way I viewed things but it didn't lead to anything. Trying weed a few months ago for the first time in many years is was opened my mind and made my ADHD brain feel brilliant for the first time in my life. I'm hoping shrooms does the same.

Maybe i'll try 5g of dmt next time and see what happens. I usually like nightmares for the adrenaline rush when I wake up. But this is one i'll tread very light on If I have a go at it again. Hell, 50 didn't kill me, i'm sure I can try 5 to see what happens and MAYBE go up from there.

Come to think of it, all drugs (prescription) have always hit me really hard on low doses. Maybe it was WAY too much for me. But then again, why would I be WIDE awake going from walking around, laying down, back up (very disoriented) while waiting for it to pass? Confusing.

Terror is exactly how it felt. Complete terror.