OneToInfinity
Rising Star
Metallic pinwheels in hyperspace
I am not a smoker. I've never taken hallucinogens. I've minimally smoked pot and tend to prefer alcohol. But some friends' experiences on DMT got me curious so I decided to take the plunge on what turned out to be the day of the lunar eclipse and the eve of the full moon and winter equinox (12/20/10). Coughing a bit, I took 3 hits of yellow crystals which quickly released me from reality. I immediately had no sense of the room around me and a vague sense of physical unease and not being able to breathe. I remember thinking "oh shit, oh no! This is it! No turning back! You're going in!" This part was physically traumatic because I was still coughing from the smoke; this was difficult and scary. I felt disengaged from my body. It was a violent beginning, like the Big Bang. The first visual I remember was a background field of gold that seemed exquisitely bright and illuminated. Layered in front were infinite geometric shapes with red dotted crosses dancing and twirling. There were 2 swirling firecracker-like, circular-star shapes that came in quickly from my peripheral: one from the left, one from the right and collided in the middle. But they were different from firecrackers because they had no chaos or randomness, they were just purity and symmetry. Everything was perfectly symmetric, infinitely deep, complex, pure and clean. Polished. Curved, silver metal. Like an Escher drawing that goes to infinity but in color and illuminated like nothing I've ever seen. Fast. Fast. Fast. Faster than fast. Light speed. I didn't expect it to be so fast! Not peaceful. Violent but exquisite. The word "beyond" seems to apply to any description I could come up with.
The overarching theme was that everything was happening at warp speed and this was very disarming and somewhat scary and difficult to process. Hyperreal. It was like someone turned the dial on my brain from a 1 to 1,000. No, make that 10,000. I was physically thrashing around a bit. Everything was hyperreal. Beyond the reality of all life experienced before this. It felt like every neuron in my brain was firing at once. Complete brain overload. I remember thinking "this is too much for my brain! Help!" I don't think I could take more than 5 minutes of it.
There was a sense of no time. There were senses here and there of wanting to go to sleep but immediately being pulled in again. There was a feeling of high voltage: that my brain had been zapped by some crackling, metallic electricity and left to sit in this high-voltage state for 5 minutes. It felt like my brain had been seized and squeezed.
I don't remember what happened during the middle. I was more at ease during the last third (?). I kept reaching for water, I was so parched from the smoke but I couldn't quite focus on my water glass to pick it up. My friend sitting next to me looked like a short dwarf. His presence was very grounding and I was thankful for it, always there for what seemed like a long time, constantly changing (short, close, far away). As I came off it, the floor looked like it had clear beads of liquid running horizontally across it. The cat looked like a sausage. I enjoyed the distorted reality of the room around me as I came off it, as things started to slow down. I felt resistant to the first part, it was so utterly mind-blowing and violent and fast that I was relieved to know it was ending. It felt like rebirth. I cannot describe the intricacy and color I saw. I kept pulling my hair back and tugging on it, putting my hands on my face, flailing a bit. It took me about 20 minutes to stop shaking afterward.
This was the most extreme thing I've ever seen in my mind. The experience was nothing like I was expecting. Nothing can prepare you for this. No videos or descriptions or previous experiences. I feel like my brain was re-booted. I had no idea I could see the things I did. I will never forget that first firecracker explosion of gold and red and perfect geometry. Everything was so pure and clean. Not a spec of toxin or adulteration or randomness. I did feel later, after thinking about it, the vague sense of being shown something by something outside of me. And that something was slightly laughing as if to say "here you go! you asked for it! We're gonna show you EVERYTHING at ONCE."
But I am so happy to have seen that. Maybe this is what reality looks like when there is no time dimension: everything happens at once, on top of each other. Regular life now seems really slow.
I am really thankful and happy for this experience and have a new amazement and respect for what our brains can experience. The lasting image is the first one: the gold and red and symmetric, metallic geometry in hyper-speed motion. I do feel I took a trip from which there is no return. Everyone should experience this once.
The next day
I couldn't sleep because my brain was still reeling from the experience. The next day I was consumed with thoughts and epiphanies. Consciousness might be god (further reason to respect it). Physicality is irrelevant.
But why are our brains normally vibrating at such a lower frequency? The DMT was high-frequency and divine. How is it that we get caught up in these self-hating thoughts, suicide, war, etc. ?
The mundane world around me seems to be of a lower vibration: cats, food, everything made of matter. I had seen what perfection looked like. Perfect symmetry. Maybe there is just consciousness? My brain has been zapped. Opened up and reset. The high-pitched sound like when a needle slides across a record.
Everything I saw was in extreme high definition.
Reality might be an intricate machine that is made of pure geometry and mathematics?
Why does it make you so happy? Happy to be let in on a secret? Happy to have seen new things you never before thought possible? Happy to have been let free of a dreary reality?
What I saw in that 5 minutes was much closer to a visualization of all the things I read about in string theory and physics but failed to imagine. When I try to visualize now what Brian Greene describes in "The Fabric of the Cosmos," for example, it doesn't come close to what I visualized on the DMT.
What I saw is maybe what the technology will look like one million years in the future?
Intricate, infinite patterns. Nothing from our world can be found there.
The next day I couldn't listen and watch my usual barrage of daily news because I felt it would taint and pollute my pure state. I didn't want to infiltrate my sense of well-being with its toxins.
I had a sense memory of the smell of the smoke throughout the day. The burning oil of frying onions for lunch brought it back too.
Now when I think back, I feel there was a tune that went with the beginning geometric visuals like a funhouse circus clashing sound. And interlocking patterns. Like those 3d toys that click together and transform into different shapes.
I feel I've been initiated.
I am not a smoker. I've never taken hallucinogens. I've minimally smoked pot and tend to prefer alcohol. But some friends' experiences on DMT got me curious so I decided to take the plunge on what turned out to be the day of the lunar eclipse and the eve of the full moon and winter equinox (12/20/10). Coughing a bit, I took 3 hits of yellow crystals which quickly released me from reality. I immediately had no sense of the room around me and a vague sense of physical unease and not being able to breathe. I remember thinking "oh shit, oh no! This is it! No turning back! You're going in!" This part was physically traumatic because I was still coughing from the smoke; this was difficult and scary. I felt disengaged from my body. It was a violent beginning, like the Big Bang. The first visual I remember was a background field of gold that seemed exquisitely bright and illuminated. Layered in front were infinite geometric shapes with red dotted crosses dancing and twirling. There were 2 swirling firecracker-like, circular-star shapes that came in quickly from my peripheral: one from the left, one from the right and collided in the middle. But they were different from firecrackers because they had no chaos or randomness, they were just purity and symmetry. Everything was perfectly symmetric, infinitely deep, complex, pure and clean. Polished. Curved, silver metal. Like an Escher drawing that goes to infinity but in color and illuminated like nothing I've ever seen. Fast. Fast. Fast. Faster than fast. Light speed. I didn't expect it to be so fast! Not peaceful. Violent but exquisite. The word "beyond" seems to apply to any description I could come up with.
The overarching theme was that everything was happening at warp speed and this was very disarming and somewhat scary and difficult to process. Hyperreal. It was like someone turned the dial on my brain from a 1 to 1,000. No, make that 10,000. I was physically thrashing around a bit. Everything was hyperreal. Beyond the reality of all life experienced before this. It felt like every neuron in my brain was firing at once. Complete brain overload. I remember thinking "this is too much for my brain! Help!" I don't think I could take more than 5 minutes of it.
There was a sense of no time. There were senses here and there of wanting to go to sleep but immediately being pulled in again. There was a feeling of high voltage: that my brain had been zapped by some crackling, metallic electricity and left to sit in this high-voltage state for 5 minutes. It felt like my brain had been seized and squeezed.
I don't remember what happened during the middle. I was more at ease during the last third (?). I kept reaching for water, I was so parched from the smoke but I couldn't quite focus on my water glass to pick it up. My friend sitting next to me looked like a short dwarf. His presence was very grounding and I was thankful for it, always there for what seemed like a long time, constantly changing (short, close, far away). As I came off it, the floor looked like it had clear beads of liquid running horizontally across it. The cat looked like a sausage. I enjoyed the distorted reality of the room around me as I came off it, as things started to slow down. I felt resistant to the first part, it was so utterly mind-blowing and violent and fast that I was relieved to know it was ending. It felt like rebirth. I cannot describe the intricacy and color I saw. I kept pulling my hair back and tugging on it, putting my hands on my face, flailing a bit. It took me about 20 minutes to stop shaking afterward.
This was the most extreme thing I've ever seen in my mind. The experience was nothing like I was expecting. Nothing can prepare you for this. No videos or descriptions or previous experiences. I feel like my brain was re-booted. I had no idea I could see the things I did. I will never forget that first firecracker explosion of gold and red and perfect geometry. Everything was so pure and clean. Not a spec of toxin or adulteration or randomness. I did feel later, after thinking about it, the vague sense of being shown something by something outside of me. And that something was slightly laughing as if to say "here you go! you asked for it! We're gonna show you EVERYTHING at ONCE."
But I am so happy to have seen that. Maybe this is what reality looks like when there is no time dimension: everything happens at once, on top of each other. Regular life now seems really slow.
I am really thankful and happy for this experience and have a new amazement and respect for what our brains can experience. The lasting image is the first one: the gold and red and symmetric, metallic geometry in hyper-speed motion. I do feel I took a trip from which there is no return. Everyone should experience this once.
The next day
I couldn't sleep because my brain was still reeling from the experience. The next day I was consumed with thoughts and epiphanies. Consciousness might be god (further reason to respect it). Physicality is irrelevant.
But why are our brains normally vibrating at such a lower frequency? The DMT was high-frequency and divine. How is it that we get caught up in these self-hating thoughts, suicide, war, etc. ?
The mundane world around me seems to be of a lower vibration: cats, food, everything made of matter. I had seen what perfection looked like. Perfect symmetry. Maybe there is just consciousness? My brain has been zapped. Opened up and reset. The high-pitched sound like when a needle slides across a record.
Everything I saw was in extreme high definition.
Reality might be an intricate machine that is made of pure geometry and mathematics?
Why does it make you so happy? Happy to be let in on a secret? Happy to have seen new things you never before thought possible? Happy to have been let free of a dreary reality?
What I saw in that 5 minutes was much closer to a visualization of all the things I read about in string theory and physics but failed to imagine. When I try to visualize now what Brian Greene describes in "The Fabric of the Cosmos," for example, it doesn't come close to what I visualized on the DMT.
What I saw is maybe what the technology will look like one million years in the future?
Intricate, infinite patterns. Nothing from our world can be found there.
The next day I couldn't listen and watch my usual barrage of daily news because I felt it would taint and pollute my pure state. I didn't want to infiltrate my sense of well-being with its toxins.
I had a sense memory of the smell of the smoke throughout the day. The burning oil of frying onions for lunch brought it back too.
Now when I think back, I feel there was a tune that went with the beginning geometric visuals like a funhouse circus clashing sound. And interlocking patterns. Like those 3d toys that click together and transform into different shapes.
I feel I've been initiated.
Now you can call yourself a man (just kidding 
