seeking the truth, just an artistic newbie

[goldenratio]

My first post, I'm a new and eager seeker in the hyperdimensional existence, I'm really proud to be following the path I'm on right now, and have a means to communicate through this and other online communities, as far dmt and maoi, psilocybin etc, recently watched The Spirit Molecule and ever since I've been on a mad rampage to actually get my foot in the door, I fell in love with the movie and the idea of the power of dmt, and now me, just some loser house painter actually did thorough research, found a great mhrb source, and decided to just go all out and make my own crystals, and I did, beautiful prefect little snowflakes, I was VERY fortunate to have done it right, and not blow anything up or anything like that.
I've gone into hyperspace now a total of 5, but the last experience was a little experiment with lower maoi, about 2 grams, and a touch of psilocybin, basically bursts of hyperspace, three hits in about an hour, every time I've done this its showed me different and always just unfathomable glimpses into other dimensions. And I know in my heart without a doubt, was real, even questioning it at all is pure ridiculousness, all the people in here and elsewhere talking about the power of dmt, it's absurd to me that any person who's done it right could even begin to doubt or play around with discussions that don't serve the molecule any justice whatsoever, it angers me, and really only because what I found and am still finding, these drugs, dmt especially, are very very special, and have to be approached specifically to make it effective, most people aren't smart enough to even see dmt just as an idea, for what it truly is, there's far too much misinformation ignorance and stupidity, yeah I realize there's going to be people who are going to abuse it, not taking the maoi, and people who don't really try to spread the truth, or at least try, understandably trying to explain a dmt trip is about the most difficult thing a human could attempt to explain, , but I swear what this molecule is showing me is REAL reality, it's just the most amazing and strange truth there is, it's pure BEING, consciousness, it's like every sci-fi story ever written combined into one and multiplied by infinity.

That's what it shows us, infinity, and it's fractal, no real surprise there though.

So, I'm here, alone, unplugged, set free, finally alive, but...now what? I cannot convince a single person to follow me down this path, no one wants to acknowledge the truth, it's just like in The Matrix, all the minds of the enslaved, brainwashed masses who will fight to keep this frivolous, out of control monster of a society alive, they all basically equate to my enemy, and it's just really, seriously screwed up, what IS the point? I can explore the universe and infinity til I die but I can't share it with anyone, humanity is just so friggin sad and pathetic, it's killing me...hey everybody, I swear I just went through the most amazing, incredible, astounding, beyond divine, experience a human can go through, you have to try it!!
' Nah, I'm not really into that- '

I'm so lost, lonely, confused, desperate... I just wish I could merely connect the dots, put this puzzle together, but I can't do it alone, and I can't do it with people, they're all just profiles in a computer, just text on a screen, I think I just might be right in assuming I'm better off killing myself and discarding this body, I find it ever increasingly difficult to be a part of this society, this culture, the truth is, the truth is crushing me...but, I need more,I want it all, I just don't know how to proceed, I need help

 

[voyaj]

It seems like you have been there and seen it. For me when I truly went for the blast off, I knew almost immediately that suicide was not an option. I had always left suicide as an option, sometimes pondering it obsessively because I really did not believe in anything higher, that this is some science experiment, we somehow evolved in this universe but not for any reason. I thought we would die and life, consciousness whatever it is seizes to exist and your body decomposes... ashes to ashes, dust to dust.

DMT taught me that we have purpose, I do not know what that purpose is but that it is a test... to live this life to the fullest, with compassion for others, to love this life and that we will be judged. Who knows, it might be a carrier wave blast that cleanses this life and then we just go onto a better state... or maybe not? All I know is that DMT can show you an insane amount of power, when I am there it feels like Ultimate power even if it is not. It really awed me and bent my mind so far out of reach... but now I really believe that somehow my life came into alignment almost directly after my breakthrough. Now, I have an awesome job, live in an awesome city, in an awesome house with friends, play awesome shows and went on tour and my breakthrough was only a little more than a month ago. I chant before I go to sleep because DMT entities taught me to do it and it helps A LOT. Never saw all of this positive change to be possible, especially in the course of a month, but after my breakthrough I felt reborn and now my life is better and different and I am super positive, suicide in not an option and I still get to use spice occasionally! Do not give up, use spice as a positive tool.

If you feel like you are going into loops of despair I would say to leave the spice alone for a bit and integrate your experiences into every day life. And know that you are not alone.

 

[rkfitness]

do not despair. it pains me to know someone else is experiencing this feeling of isolation...how can these people around us just not care....what do they feel everyday....where are they?
i cannot explain how i have come to find this all. we have been given a gift, but I feel at the same time you can never be the same after attaining real contact with the ALL I wish we lived in a society where we could talk about our visions in the open and share this knowledge with everyone but as you see...even when people are approached with the rare opportunity to REALIZE they just don't want to hear it. So just be and let life and your heart direct you through this journey the same way it has brought this gift to you in the first place....I vaguely remember on the way back saying stuff like "Its ok.....I can take it...thank you....." sealing the deal with IT as if remembering a commitment I made which is basically the answer to my existence. Think of all you would be thankful for and you will feel the path. Nothing is without purpose...you leaving your message made me have to write as I felt like it was like looking at a mirror. what you said let me know this stuff is powerful enough to connect with other souls that are ascending higher than what current laws allow us to do. But in this play that we are in, now is the time to act in the play..and play your role as best as you can. Sending my love. dont give up. Time to flex muscles we haven't used in a long time.

 

[rkfitness]

you are right voyaj! it shows you life has so much to offer...but finding it at this time in my life it feels like an initiation..I wish I could remember more...or even articulate this in any human fashion. but with the WW3 on the brink I feel that there is some preparation happening. and we are the ones we have been waiting for. We are the generation that was born in these times but somehow managed to access these realms...i dont even get it myself...I just am trusting my heart...it seems to have given me the strength to keep seeing this mission through

 

[Wax]

Welcome friend!

You are not alone in your feelings, many of us here I'm sure have felt the same loneliness that comes with being unable to share the experience in all its glory, I know I have, and still do. There is something wrong with the world and it hurts to have to witness it as it rages on oblivious to what lies behind the curtain, it feels sometimes as if we are but a small boat in an angry sea being tossed around at its mercy.

It is true, we ARE the ones we have been waiting for, you have an amazing talent and fortunately art is the one thing that can come close to being able to share the experience. Don't let your talents go to waste, show the world what you've seen and make them FEEL it!

 

[Flying Dutchman]

Hi goldenratio. When I read your post I resonated very strongly with what you reported, especially the part about how there is no way to share this sacred experience (I really like your description of every sci fi story in one, this is the remarkable truth) because so very few people know accurate information and don't suffer from huge fear of the unknown and themselves. I have been having a lot of trouble with this lately; I had thought that at least one of my artist, psychedelic using friends would be open to this experience, but it seems everyone considers DMT as something dangerous and only for crazy people. It doesn't help that there is literally no way to describe the experience, so that even to those with a spiritual tendency, who think that they have in fact experienced what DMT does without use of substances, it is impossible to communicate how this experience is irreplaceable. It is ironic to me how you can think you have seen the be all end all and still be so closed minded that you have a thing against drugs and don't even want to give it a try merely out of principle.

However, what DMT always seems to tell me very strongly with every trip is that suicide is definitely not the best option, since the future will bring great improvements with it, and most importantly, DMT is always there for you when the need is greatest. I don't think the world will turn into a utopia from one day to the next, but in due time, just like the way we live now would be considered utopia by people 100 years ago, the same will happen for us. I also personally believe once we have reached a certain point we will come into contact with aliens/extradimensional beings that I see in hyperspace (they tell me this every time), and everything you can think of will become possible.

 

[Spiral Eye]

Damn! Those pictures are beautiful! Do you have a website with more?

 

[Guyomech]

This is a fairly common thing to go through. You've taken the red pill and your old reality model has been shattered. Naturally, it's easy to assume that everyone who has not taken that pill is sleepwalking through life, living an illusion. And it is true that a disappointing proportion of humans are simply shutting themselves off with TV and booze every night. But there are many many people, including a whole lot who have never taken psychedelics, who are honest seekers of the truth, sincere in their wish to understand more and to better themselves. You are surrounded by these folks. They are not all sleepwalking, I assure you.

One of the greatest universal characteristics of a breakthrough psychedelic experience is a recognition of the commonality that we all share. That's very important to remember. If tripping is serving to isolate you from the world, you're doing it wrong. It should be teaching a lesson of love and patience and understanding. Bear in mind that the psychedelic path is heavily stigmatized in our society, enough so that even honest truth seekers may see it in the wrong light. Accept this as being the way things are, then try to enjoy your new larger perspective.

This kind of thing can take a lot of integration. My first big breakthroughs were decades ago, and I'm still working on processing some of that. It's a huge thing. Be patient and as time passes it will all make more and more sense.

Meanwhile, make more art! That's great stuff you're doing. Post here a few more times, get promoted (not that hard), and then if you want you can share your work alongside other Nexus members at www.dmt-nexus.me/art

Making art about the psychedelic experience is one of the best ways to proactively integrate what you've experienced. Keep writing about it here too. I know I'm not the first to say this, but you are not alone. Not even close.

 

[ZenSpice]

That middle paragraph felt like a mirror that splintered and sent a slice into my heart..

Both for wishing I could take the feeling away and knowing all to well exactly how it feels.

As per the above comments, the only sentiment I can add is YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

Though in a society weaved into a domesticated and mindless reality, it can be nigh on impossible to find people to open up to, God knows I have tried (with great caution).

P.S. AMAZING art

 

[Jin]

welcome to The Nexus , sweet artwork

no need to contemplate negativity , life is beautiful , its all beautiful

 

[embracethevoid]

I'm so lost, lonely, confused, desperate... I just wish I could merely connect the dots, put this puzzle together, but I can't do it alone, and I can't do it with people, they're all just profiles in a computer, just text on a screen, I think I just might be right in assuming I'm better off killing myself and discarding this body, I find it ever increasingly difficult to be a part of this society, this culture, the truth is, the truth is crushing me...but, I need more,I want it all, I just don't know how to proceed, I need help

Try this: donate a large majority of your income to charitable endeavours that you have intimate connection with, that you can feel itself. It would be best to do the selfless work yourself; and income does not just mean money but also food, attention, resources of all kinds and above all, LOVE.

Your role on this Earth is to bring that hyperspatial reality here, you're dreaming of the finished product and feeling sad that it doesn't exist, but have you tried to make it a reality?

And keep in mind that everybody thinks that one person cannot make much of a difference - the very thought that ensures nobody makes a difference at all!



Amazing artwork by the way, it left me awestruck

 

[goldenratio]

Ok, this is a response to a private message to me about the safety of dmt, maybe the possibility of mental health could be a factor, not sure, but this is my answer,i can't reply to people in a private message cuz I'm a new to this site, which is really strange, hope the person can see and it's helpful...From what I read it could, it's plausible, but I have read alot and haven't found anything concrete whatsoever, there's so many variables, other medications you are taking of course, down to how much sleep you're on at the time you take the dmt, how pure the dmt is, how big the dose is, how much maoi, set and setting, but I'm under the belief it's really not bad as long as you meet certain criteria, go in comfortable and calm, be true and honest and dmt will show you what you need to see, Terrence McKenna says it's only dangerous in the sense you could potentially die from astonishment, it is a natural occurring molecule in our bodies, if you haven't tried it I'd suggest doing so, but always respect it, it's what I like to describe as beyond divine, that's why it's called the spirit molecule, it's not addictive, is honestly terrifying, because you leave your body into strange new dimensions, so it's not something recreational at all, it's sacred, and you'll learn to approach it that way, I honestly believe once I started to smoke it, it's started to rewire my brain,I can feel it, and when I sleep now I wake up feeling like the dmt has been working on me again, really the strangest molecule on the planet, it's all about boundary dissolution

 

[goldenratio]

I really appreciate the feedback everybody, thank you, I needed this to start some momentum in the right direction, I hope you enjoy my art, it's for us all, take it, share it, all fine point pen work, no website for it, just what I do at times,a passion for feminine beauty, what I found to be really cool is the way the dmt forms in the pipe after it cools and recrystalizes, it's fractal! And the fractals grow and change, amazing, didn't show in the picture above though, but it is still a beautiful thing

 

[rkfitness]

biggest lesson is NOT to worry. Just like YODA says, try not....do or do not. Lots of people doubt how real this all is but everything is a gamble so trust your heart and GO FOR IT!!! Your heart is where your higher self resides...let that serpent come up to your third eye...SMOLK MOAR

 

[rkfitness]

love the fact this place exists

 

[fractaleyes]

Your artwork is beautiful! Much respect to you.

My favourite method is packing into a bong some snowflakes (no measurements)
sandwiched on some herbs this can be a mix of what you like.
The beauty is you can get a good dose in one hit.

I find it interesting when i vapourize going for that 2nd and 3rd puff whilst
my vision has already begun to fractaleyes. ;-)

 

[rkfitness]

Greetings and infinite love to all from the deepest and surest place that I knew was there but thanks to the molecule and my spirit for guiding me to it. I went for it last night as I had taken a few months to properly integrate the last few trips and reassure myself I am not just crazy. Well I feel I had received a message that I needed and much of the experience is hard to remember besides my uploading of my data to the light database, and receiving light food to spread to whoever gets to read this or be in my very presence. I am not one to waste opportunity. Being in the angelic realm and meeting THE HIGHER SELF and to be a vessel of this energy is no longer a secret....It is THIS experience that will transcend anyone's belief systems to know the consequence in getting too lost in one's own ego...I have done this myself in life and I want to let you all know...IT'S OK! The LIGHT is finally here. LET GO, TRUST, go through life's growing pains..because like me..you are GOD. Just by reading this you know the message that we are sharing together to experience this drug called LIFE...for we are eternity and everything that comes with it. Our hearts are sacred and have all the grace it takes for paradise to finally be here. Let's unlock it ME, YOU, ME, YOU, ME, YOU. Just as we are afraid to those first tokes into hyperspace...that is training wheels for us becoming into our ALL. LET GO!!!! This is such a crazy time to be ALIVE.

There's so much I could blabble on about but SHHH!!!! many of you can hear and see all of it in the silence of the now. LOVE YOU I know this is weird. We are the roots that finally broke through the ground into new dimensions of growth. Cannot wait to spread my wings with whoever is willing to come with me. So this is what it feels like to be GOD. Have a safe journey home
i definitely suggest

Above and Beyond can take you there. Everything right now is perfect and flowing. This afterglow is what I needed. My family needs me right now and my girlfriend we have all gone through soooo much. They give me strength. Even though we are still holding the pain....I have been reminded that home is always with me Thank you for reading. Everything is ok...I know it now.

 

[Orion]

You have a gift, and we love it, this alone is purpose enough to validate your existence.

And what medium are these amazingly detailed pieces made with ?

*EDIT* Join your fellows! Attention artistic members: submit work for new Nexus art gallery! - Announcements and Suggestions - Welcome to the DMT-Nexus

 

[goldenratio]

Specially modified fine point Papermate pens on 10/13ish stiff paper, upwards of a couple hundred hours to make one usually

 

[L Sol Tace]

It's easy to fill our heads with doubts as we're flying high during these states. It's uncomfortable at first but we grow accustomed to the new feelings. We are constanly changing the vibrational state we work at, and if you reach new highs the median is going to be higher as well. Everything around you is a mirror to you. there's nothing in death I believe is going to raise your vibration more than what's possible here. Everything is a Mirror to you, and you a mirror to everything else.