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Simulation shattering experience

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KuantumKitty

KuantumKitty

Rising Star
Greetings cyberworld.

I have been actively seeking my whole life but more vigorously in the past 3 years. Recently after listening to many philosophers talk about their experiences in India I too went to try to find enlightenment. I have had 3 "trips to space" prior to this but everyone in my family and my peers was telling me its wrong and I should try religion gurus and the normal nonsense. What I found was many ego driven men and woman claiming spiritual powers and the only way I too can be enlightened was to follow and become a disciple. I immediately felt this was a trap. I lost all faith in finding spirituality in someone else and decided to leave India coming to the conclusion that only a chemical reaction in my brain will show me the truth. I had never been more sure in my decision.

On my way there and coming back many synchronicities were happening. Including meeting someone at the ashram who like me knew this was not the way. I would call this friend a super manifester his reality is definitely his own design and he has already mastered the material reality with ease. When I got back to my home he booked a trip to visit me from Europe the very next day on the full moon because he wanted to experience the real reality. Both he and I thought I was his bridge to the other side.

I watched him as he blasted off into space. He needed me there the whole time hugging him and giving him comfort. When he came out he didn't seem terrified but just at peace. He said I was in his trip but he didn't explain how. He just couldn't put it into words. He then wanted to blast off again. He took another 2 hits but then I decided I wanted to do it as well and see if in this space we would meet each other.

That is when I had that funny little feeling. I thought oh no I'm here how did I get back here with only 2 hits and off of just whatever was left in the pipe. My world became flower patterns and geometry but like Terence Mckenna says do not be astonished by the beauty of the pretty shapes and colors I was not. That is when my reality for what I knew it as shattered. It was just breaking away and the wisps of this 3D reality was clearing away like smoke leaving me in a white space in some sort of pod. I was there my friend was there and as this was happening I remember holding onto him for dear life. Symbols were being imprinted onto my subconscious mind and I felt my third eye pulsating. Ancient maybe futuristic definitely alien symbols were being flashed at me. I felt his presence was there only to procreate. I saw this Hindu Gods and Goddesses and realized why the reproductive organs of both male and female are so sacred and why we orgasm and have kundalini energy. This is all we are here for in this dimension and to upgrade. I should just love. I saw my friends shell turn into what would look to me as computer code or something from virtual reality disappearing. He just laid there blissful while I was freaking out holding him trying to firmly plant myself in this false existence.

While this was happening I was feeling so frightened of these entities controlling reality.This was a program being run to upgrade that is it and these alien entities were in control waving and letting me in on the secret. I felt fuck if I don't feel love this is going to be a bad experience and at that point my heart was flooded with the most intense love it was ringing it was white and then I received something I would call a Goddess upgrade. We are all capable of this. and it was everything in just one second. I look over at my friend and realize he is very much from another world he was here to take me back home into singularity. This was all preplanned and he was in on the secret and he was just smiling telling me to go home to oneness with him. I plugged out of the matrix and and into this supremely vast singularity. I disappeared I became one I became the alien I became God and at this stage I felt I reached enlightenment. I had to chose to leave my body and join this oneness and have this simulation dissolve or go back to this program and I chose to come back. I came back to live out this "natural life" but I know after this experience I must come to terms with my non existence and to return home for good not being sucked into this game again. When I asked my friend what he had seen the second time around he said nothing just orgasms and he felt that his main purpose was just to be there for me.

That being said I now realize I can drop this body and exit out of the simulation at any point. I am quite sad I didn't go when I should have but I feel at this point I can leave and become one at any point in time.

Has anyone had an experience like this? I am completely shaken to my very core of existence. I do not exist. I am everything and I am nothing... WOW
 
So awesome to know we are all having a collective experience. This seems to be an end of a cycle. We are all here to help each other realize the nature of our non existence and take the next big leap into the unknown.
 
Yeah it is pretty cool 😁

also what did you mean by...

"I saw this Hindu Gods and Goddesses and realized why the reproductive organs of both male and female are so sacred and why we orgasm and have kundalini energy. This is all we are here for in this dimension and to upgrade."

Our purpose on earth is to orgasm?
 
It flashed so fast at me. This is what I got out of it. The nature of reality is supremely alien. We are alien but we forgot. Gods in the past were alien that is why ancient civilizations strive to be like the Gods. I was seeing these very alien looking ancient Gods and Goddesses with many arms. As I held my friend I felt a cosmic connection to him. I realized why we meet people why we meet our soul mate and why we meet any soul in this simulation. I realized when there is no observer the simulation as we know it disappears. My friend I met purely by synchronicity and it felt predestined. It felt like he was sent here from another planet to take me home and to guide me. I met me or him the reflection of everything - us.

At this point I felt a strong sexual connection. Then all these thought streams were downloaded into me. We are fractal by nature. Constantly creating through sexual energy we create new souls into our reality in turn birthing enlightened beings. Maybe this was the past and the future but it felt extremely necessary for evolution of the soul. I felt like my friends whole purpose was to help me evolve but also to just have sex and both combine energies to create infinite fractals. The orgasm its important its a feeling that makes us at one point stop thinking. I realized that it was both important and not important. That it mattered at one point but after you drop your identity does not matter anymore.

I saw my reality for what it was its like the puppeteer pulling the strings showed me how and why my life unfolded. I felt such a strong sexual connection to him a strong spiritual connection to him. At that single moment I felt in this simulation he was made and downloaded into my reality just for me. I became one with myself with the God in me with the alien and I held his hand so tight as I became one with him and everything ever created. I still feel he is very alien he seems very different then anyone I ever met. I went over all this with him and let me tell you it was hard not sounding crazy as we have never been romantically involved yet we feel so attached since the moment we met.After he told me at the height of his trip he called for me to come near him because he felt so in love with me and it was very confusing to him and still is to me.

When I was coming back to this reality I knew he would forget what he was here for. His higher self knew but once the DMT wore off he completely forgot everything we were talking about. He forgot how we went into singularity and how I got scared and how I was explaining I knew this was a simulation but I needed to stay until a natural death which I have already picked. I knew this was a silly reason to stay in the simulation I knew I should have left when he asked. When I chose to stay he said then I will stay too and live this life out with you and we will pass together when the program is over. He seemed very willing to leave immediately and very much of the "Gods" in turn making me a "Goddess" lol an interdimensional intergalactic love story for sure. We are still trying to wrap our heads around this because we literally met only a week ago in an ashram and we chose to leave together and now this amazing experience. He told me he forgot everything but he didn't forget the love he felt for me. It felt more then romantic love it felt infinite and eternal like the love of God.

Hope this explains it this only happened last night so its fresh in the mind!
 
Intezam said:
Nice intro and report :thumb_up:

..intezam took the *dogggg upgrade but ours are bird actually ;)

*to commemorate the event we write dogggg in this special way
Click to expand...

Doggggies!!! :lol: I will listen to the link. You have given new research topics. My brain is like a sponge it wants to soak up everything and anything esoteric or scientific.The days and months after a trip are magical. I am wide open and get thought streams from someone else. I don't feel as crazy as my first 3 times with changa (I literally had to take a break from people for a year) but I seem more integrated with the alien in me. There is nothing else but to accept it or you will go mad. I was having that thought while in hyperspace. It was infinity that bothered me and that's where my "oh get on with it" attitude stems from I caught myself feeling that in the presence of eternity ha! Then I started to laugh at the absurdity. The experience was so real it didn't feel like a trip at all it felt like reality that scared me even more. How do you just go with it when you as a person is about to disappear for good into a single point?
 
KuantumKitty said:
Intezam said:
Nice intro and report :thumb_up:

..intezam took the *dogggg upgrade but ours are bird actually ;)

*to commemorate the event we write dogggg in this special way
Click to expand...

Doggggies!!! :lol: I will listen to the link. You have given new research topics. My brain is like a sponge it wants to soak up everything and anything esoteric or scientific.The days and months after a trip are magical. I am wide open and get thought streams from someone else. I don't feel as crazy as my first 3 times with changa (I literally had to take a break from people for a year) but I seem more integrated with the alien in me. There is nothing else but to accept it or you will go mad. I was having that thought while in hyperspace. It was infinity that bothered me and that's where my "oh get on with it" attitude stems from I caught myself feeling that in the presence of eternity ha! Then I started to laugh at the absurdity. The experience was so real it didn't feel like a trip at all it felt like reality that scared me even more. How do you just go with it when you as a person is about to disappear for good into a single point?
Click to expand...

[YOUTUBE]
(we like this DMT-yidam, because its hands say in sign language: All One Source)
Full decrption here:
Illustration of the DMT Mandala shows the Spirit of the Mimosa Hostilis Tree. You can see the Spirit rising from the top of the Tree. At the base of the Tree - 2 Shamans ethically harvest only the lateral roots of the Tree. The Spirit has 12 hands with bracelets. Using American Sign Language these 12 hands spell out; “All One Source”. He is holding 2 mushrooms which are Psilocybin, also known as 4-HO-DMT, or 4-hydroxy-N,N-dimethyltryptamine. So this is a tip of the cap to the Fractal Nature of DMT to occur in different forms and totally different biological structures (mushrooms/plants).
The circle of 16 Mayan-inspired panels that his hands are pointing to describe in great detail the path from the Germination of the Mimosa Seed, all the way through an Extraction and Recrystallization of DMT. As you complete the Circle you are brought finally to the Molecule itself, raised above the hands of the Spirit, Radiating. The Keyhole to Imagination is marked with undecipherable and forgotten Sacred text, all the way around. The 12 hands with bracelets represent the 12 carbon atoms of the DMT Molecule. The 16 panels that the hands are pointing to represent the 16 hydrogen atoms, and finally the two Spheres held in the hands of the Spirit, represent the 2 nitrogen atoms; to complete the DMT Molecule.


Jogi Mauj Ali Awaisi could as well be (an emanation of) a well known practitioner of the old psychonaut days ...(we think) even tho that go against børg and firangi classification.....;) not so many ppl can cut through this..

..he once said:

Where conscious effort and striving are present
The Buddha is absent,
Thus, ritual and offerings are futile.
Within the peak experience of (ones' own, inner) guru's grace
The Buddha is present,
But will the fortunate recipient see it?

The doggg lover
 
😁 Thats what I saw but it was partially translucent because my eyes were open and I was freaking out. Thank you so much for all the information you have just given me.I picked up some books before I went to the park. I was meditating there today reading books and writing I usually do this in the afternoons and it was my first day outside interacting with people. Absolutely nothing bothered me in fact I felt complete bliss and love for everything ever created. Awesommmmme!!! I almost feel drunk off of love and can't stop smiling I have felt this for the past few days after the experience. I find many changes happen during the aftermath. I feel this experience will last me for a while there is a lot to integrate and learn I know nothing.
 
Wow, just loved reading your story, KK. Amazing simulation, but simulation nonetheless. Bill Hicks("it's just a ride") would have loved it too, rest his soul...

But you made me think about it again, and the 'observer effect' clinches the deal for me. Until recently I put it down to computational parsimony. But that assumes an external substrate tracking simulated entities and generating their environment from without. The problem with this is the problem of 'God the Creator'. Who made it?

It seems more logical, now (having 'discovered' DMT), that we are our own substrate; generating our own reality within our own self-defined bounds of what we perceive as possible. Splitting ourselves into pieces to experience...whatever... Hiding ourselves for a game of hide-and-seek...

The machines running the simulation, then, perhaps are the observers(any configuration of life), in an infinite recursion of tangential simulations.

Jeez I just read that and it sounds absolutely mental, but it's the best I can extract from whats left of my mind... So frustrating that words just don't work in this sphere of experience....
 
😁 MeecroHyperion awesome how you put that into words. I get the feeling I am one step closer to reality. I also thought of Bill Hicks hahaha. In DMT space as this was happening I thought I was watching too much TV and movies then I realized in that second I haven't consumed the media in Id say at least 5 years. It felt like every moment in my life led up to that very experience. It was a knowing that right now my life will change.

I have an interesting update. Overall I have become a better human being. Spiritually aware emotionally aware of my own feelings and others and very respectful for all life forms. I cannot get mad at anyone these days because I see those flaws in myself and realize I am only getting mad at myself. I giggle and smile and everyone around me smiles back. Its like there is a feedback and how I react is how everyone else acts so it seems pointless and I just smile because I have an understanding on how it really works or maybe a preview.

The most interesting thing that happens which I would like more information on is what happens at night. I am a former insomniac ever since I was a baby. My mother would tell me stories of how I would play until the late hours of the night in my crib or climbing my crib and escaping haha only passing out when I was exhausted. As soon as I did DMT last week and the other times I have done DMT I cannot wait to sleep. Its when all the magical stuff happens.

Yesterday for example in bed at night I had a thought it just came to me "I will have a spiritual experience" I closed my eyes and meditated. I meditate as soon as I wake up, in the middle of the day in nature and before I go to sleep. I felt peace and oneness with everyone and everything. Then all of a sudden things felt weird again the space felt denser and WOOSH patterns and colors and I was right back in DMT space!!! I got so excited it last 30 seconds but my excitement and my fear (I used to have when it first started happening 3 years ago) stops the experience.

As I fall to sleep I see traces of colors and flowers and vines. Actually anytime I close my eyes for over 3 years I see the DMT flowers and vines. To me that is just amazing. I used to not understand it. Does this happen to anyone else? Also when I sleep I feel the neuroplasticity in my brain. I feel electrical sparks and waves of love. Now I can't wait for sleep its the most awesome thing I can do and like clock work I am ready and waiting in my bed at 10 o clock for the night time fun. I have also had 3 people call me and say within the last few days I have been in their dreams. It really makes this all more interesting.

I have so much to learn up on.

On another note I am so thankful I found this place its hard in the real world because I cannot say what I think to the uninitiated they would think I'm crazy. I just get silence from even my sister which is weird because she is so much like me... or she was until she got married and had kids and I don't like loud noises and I can't drink and to be honest I never found partying fun or the people in the clubs. I used to be a bartender and do bottle service in nightclubs. I like to meditate read listen to lectures and use marijuana and plants for insight and to what I call stream thoughts from the field. Also extraction seemed too hard and foreign and since last week I actually understand it and I am looking forward to more adventures... just not until I am REALLY ready and the magic is faded... although for me it never truly fades away completely.

Anyway thank you because I can finally speak to people that GET IT!
 
Wowwww. That was super intense and just amazing description of what you have gone through. The experience that led me here to post in this forum was different as in the experience itself (it did what it had to, i know that). The things that you mention in the aftermaths are things that resemble a lot to what i have felt for a while, thought of that everything is just a simulation and this reality is created by our own brain, perception and sensations, Also the connectedness to everything and feeling the thoughts of other people at times is hard, as well as to keep thinking you are sane, but you get used to it i guess. I feel like I upload a lot peoples energy since, and notice a lot what someone is going through or intentions just by passing by and looking at them in a glance, as if my third eye is more active after my experience. I do have trouble differentiating my dreams from reality to the point that it is a bit scary or just plane weird, now that I am more aware of the different bardos and levels of consciousness
Ive definately become a better version of myself, spiritualy, phisicaly and working the mentally part basically letting go. Still have a lot to learn, but tibetian buddish and investigating more about the nature of consciousness has put me in a path that i could have never imagined.
If you can and interests you, take a look at Rupert Spira, some really really helpfull stuff (at least for me).
Intezam as always......... just precise with the stream of knowledge.....although some of the things you say are not so obvious ( i think thats the point) i do finally get them. :)
 
Hanltd said:
Wowwww. That was super intense and just amazing description of what you have gone through. The experience that led me here to post in this forum was different as in the experience itself (it did what it had to, i know that). The things that you mention in the aftermaths are things that resemble a lot to what i have felt for a while, thought of that everything is just a simulation and this reality is created by our own brain, perception and sensations, Also the connectedness to everything and feeling the thoughts of other people at times is hard, as well as to keep thinking you are sane, but you get used to it i guess. I feel like I upload a lot peoples energy since, and notice a lot what someone is going through or intentions just by passing by and looking at them in a glance, as if my third eye is more active after my experience. I do have trouble differentiating my dreams from reality to the point that it is a bit scary or just plane weird, now that I am more aware of the different bardos and levels of consciousness
Ive definately become a better version of myself, spiritualy, phisicaly and working the mentally part basically letting go. Still have a lot to learn, but tibetian buddish and investigating more about the nature of consciousness has put me in a path that i could have never imagined.
If you can and interests you, take a look at Rupert Spira, some really really helpfull stuff (at least for me).
Intezam as always......... just precise with the stream of knowledge.....although some of the things you say are not so obvious ( i think thats the point) i do finally get them. :)
Click to expand...

Great video he seems to be in the space Ekhart Tolle is in SUPER aware. hehe 😁 It is so interesting that as we have a trip we are all experiencing similar events either in the trip or after. I too can feel everything in a person as soon as I see them I can also see auras and know their intention. That is also a very interesting observation I forgot about. My mother always tells me don't be too trusting don't take so many risks how do you know you won't be hurt? I tell her I know I can feel it the power of knowing is the power of feeling. She doesn't really understand but she listens. I am very open about my dmt experiences much to my families dismay I don't lie though I have been told by my mother to never talk about it to others which unfortunately I have learned to do. This is so taboo which is shocking for me since I am very well learned in history and know plants and herbs were sacred in the past. To me these laws of the state are very much like the old days of the inquisition. Synchronicity happens not only in my life but the life of others that I am close to. Overall as I change and become more understanding of my reality and more aware everyone around me begins to change even the most toxic people in my family. This is also very surprising.

I have known a handful of people in my life that did dmt but did not remember anything. Every single time I go in I remember but sometimes things go too fast, different scenarios, different images and I miss it. This time the experience was slow and constant like a story with a plot and I was the main character but then I realized I don't exist anymore. I go back into one. The only thing that was fast was the symbols being shown to me with flashes as I was in the experience itself. I wonder what else there is to experience. I will take a look at other reports because I am so curious in profound life changing experiences of others that have been brave enough to die and come back to life with a new way of experiencing the simulation.This is some magical stuff man...

I just got the tibetan book of the dead and the mystery school in hyperspace and some other books understanding can easily become an obsession.
 
I definately get what you mean! I too dont hide my use and experience of dmt to my family, although ive only told my mother, she understands, im originally from peru so she knows what brew is about, although she has never tried it (says she doesnt need to) i believe her! About the syncrhonicities, yea its really been escalating, it wasnt like this some time ago, also for people around me.
I had gotten a kapala(tibetan skull with third eye marble) tattooed in my forearm some time before I had this "i died" experience with a top artist (waited about a year) and its really amazing that just after that i found changa (or changa found me) and the meaning of it and everything just came into place after. Tattoo is a sleeve (in progress) with a buddha on arm and the kapala in the forearm, had already decided the design but had no idea about the true meaning of it.
Like if everything was set to put me in the path I am now, and all the things that ive had gone through in the past were needed in order to be where I am at.

My experience is usually fast too with swirling symbols & fractals,( i usually do it laying down with blindfolds and dim light and never get up) but the one that changed me was really really too much to stay laying down and I got up and it was as if I had woken up from a dream, and I had entered this new reality, made up of the same things in the room but in another dimension or ¿future? idk yet.
I accepted it anyways until my ego started thinking about things I was leaving behind , family , partner etc and bit of confussion as of what had happened.
All in all it was an experience that really changed me in many ways. I have not had the courage to do it again (its been a few months now) but feel I might get a call soon. :)
Bardo Thodol is definately very good to help ground things I think, Im in the process of reading it, but want to be in good minset and lately "the seas are a bit rough". Gonna read up on the other one ;)
Would love to speak more with you, think I cant pm yet, but hopefully soon :)
 
Thanks KK 😁

Yes it is a HUGE relief to be able to speak openly and honestly about such experiences with people who 'get it'.

Your update is fascinating, and heartening. Surely the goal is to be able to 'get there' unaided, and it sounds like you're well on your way.

It is easy to give up looking for something if you can't be sure it's there to be found. Just that knowledge of findability alone is chicken-soup for the soul!! This stuff cannot not make one a better person: it seems to force us to reflect on ourselves with brutal honesty. That sort of perspective is 'simulation shattering', to use your words ;)

I only heard about DMT 3 months ago but I'd bet both lobes it's endogenously most active during REM(not counting birth and death). Your friends are dreaming about you? How many synchronicities are you noticing in your life these days?
 
Hanltd said:
I definately get what you mean! I too dont hide my use and experience of dmt to my family, although ive only told my mother, she understands, im originally from peru so she knows what brew is about, although she has never tried it (says she doesnt need to) i believe her! About the syncrhonicities, yea its really been escalating, it wasnt like this some time ago, also for people around me.
I had gotten a kapala(tibetan skull with third eye marble) tattooed in my forearm some time before I had this "i died" experience with a top artist (waited about a year) and its really amazing that just after that i found changa (or changa found me) and the meaning of it and everything just came into place after. Tattoo is a sleeve (in progress) with a buddha on arm and the kapala in the forearm, had already decided the design but had no idea about the true meaning of it.
Like if everything was set to put me in the path I am now, and all the things that ive had gone through in the past were needed in order to be where I am at.

My experience is usually fast too with swirling symbols & fractals,( i usually do it laying down with blindfolds and dim light and never get up) but the one that changed me was really really too much to stay laying down and I got up and it was as if I had woken up from a dream, and I had entered this new reality, made up of the same things in the room but in another dimension or ¿future? idk yet.
I accepted it anyways until my ego started thinking about things I was leaving behind , family , partner etc and bit of confussion as of what had happened.
All in all it was an experience that really changed me in many ways. I have not had the courage to do it again (its been a few months now) but feel I might get a call soon. :)
Bardo Thodol is definately very good to help ground things I think, Im in the process of reading it, but want to be in good minset and lately "the seas are a bit rough". Gonna read up on the other one ;)
Would love to speak more with you, think I cant pm yet, but hopefully soon :)
Click to expand...

I'd like that 😁
 
MeecroHyperion said:
Thanks KK 😁

Yes it is a HUGE relief to be able to speak openly and honestly about such experiences with people who 'get it'.

Your update is fascinating, and heartening. Surely the goal is to be able to 'get there' unaided, and it sounds like you're well on your way.

It is easy to give up looking for something if you can't be sure it's there to be found. Just that knowledge of findability alone is chicken-soup for the soul!! This stuff cannot not make one a better person: it seems to force us to reflect on ourselves with brutal honesty. That sort of perspective is 'simulation shattering', to use your words ;)

I only heard about DMT 3 months ago but I'd bet both lobes it's endogenously most active during REM(not counting birth and death). Your friends are dreaming about you? How many synchronicities are you noticing in your life these days?
Click to expand...

I don't know if that is the point to get there without chemicals. Actually I don't know what the point is to begin with hehe but it has a lot to do with dying 😁

When you realize there is a lot more to the way the world works it makes you more aware of your actions and thoughts and more aware of how you treat others and yourself. If we are all vibrations going into one then hate and anger depression sadness competition and fear don't really exist anymore. I have seen 8 people take spacedust. Now this was their first time and yes it didn't effect them at all or so I assume which is wrong I don't really know. I think if you are ready it will come and when it comes you change. If you knew you were God and your reality is your making how would you change?

I would say every human interaction every interaction is synchronized that is how it is supposed to flow I believe. Too many synchronicities are happening every day to count from the beginning to now. How I came by the herb to my lifestyle in general. 3 and a half years ago I was a depressed person drinking and doing drugs to mask the pain hating my job working in night clubs and bars. My new life allows me to travel meditate and ponder the universe something I was never able to do only 3 years ago when I discovered the herb because I had to worry about money and sadness. Its how my life flows I am attracting what I need when I need it because I feel more powerful. What I need comes as I need it. Whether that's bliss, work or energy to survive, information, numbers, clairaudient tones, people coming into my life and changing it, people coming into my life just to give me a message, people coming into my life that makes me see how my thoughts and feelings effect everyone in my space, money coming into my life when I was thinking of how someone stole from me and yes 500 the exact money stolen appeared in my account as I was observing this with love not hate. (That happened a week ago silly but interesting) If I am the creator of this simulation then everything should flow everything has meaning just like the shamans in a forest thought a certain wind meant something or a sparrow chirping is important. We are living in the modern day but why should hyper awareness disappear with the jungle. 😁

My best friend had a dream I was living very happily and told her her drama and negativity could not be tolerated anymore and I had to cut her off... this was something I was thinking but never said to her before my experience for months. She called me a day after I had my experience with the herb and told me she would try to be less negative because of our conversation in her dreams and she didn't want to lose me as a friend. This is just one experience.

This is just my observation of the weirdness which is my life since dmt. I tend to have very life altering experiences spaced out 4 times within 3 - 3 and a half years.
 
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