SWIM likes smoking DMT and doing some nitrous quickly. When already on a little lsd, smoking some dmt and quickly getting into the timeloop of nitrous takes me to a place so far removed from the boundary condition of spacetime, only the deep true self exists to bear witness to all the joy and pain that this universe will provide. Deep into all dualities that force upon the singularity beyond the fractal void of death.
SWIM can only take so much DMT before the teaching becomes so intense SWIM won't remember the intricacies of the experience. The weight of each own's personal path to acceptance of all that is becomes too heavy a load to bear, so the mind won't remember, or else SWIM would spend too much time weeping for the suffering of humanity. What is important to remember from these is how to express the essence of love and compassion, from those memories we can make better decisions in our day to day journeys, and offset the suffering for ourselves and those we are gifted to share our moments with.
SWIM likes to fill a classic style balloon half full with nitrous, take 2 hits of dmt (not quite over the threshold, but into the heavy waves and hyperspacial 3d plastic wrapped stepped gradient reality), and blow the dmt hits into the balloon with the nitrous.... then rapid breathe the balloon. SWIM has even made mental points to take breaths of fresh air and mentally be able to count to 3 without getting too distracted and dissolving into deep thought before I will continue with the balloon. And then there is that special new threshold breakthrough... With the addition of nitrous I feel it gives more of a 5-meo-dmt vibe but there is what I would call a timeloop, from which the history of every atom in my body forged in stars is remembered and the experience of living the life of every star burning working tirelessly in the cold dark vacuum is remembered, and the death of every star is experienced... From this the cosmic play, the divine tragic comedy is observed clearly in it's feedback loop. And then out of nowhere I am alone on a couch in a silent room, realizing how ridiculous it is for someone to be sitting alone in silence pushing the boundaries of what the mind can grok. Tears streaming down my face...
Back to the topic at hand... I think to be able to remember the lessons we show ourselves in the depth of the experience, we must slowly journey further. We cannot just go far distances into it without first becoming comfortable in the deep thick time. To remember more than the essence takes training and dedication, similar to working out, it is best to get accustomed to the weights before you reach for the big ones.