DMT has altered me.

[DeltaSpice]

Since partaking in DMT over the last year or two , I've noticed a change within myself.
I just want to know if this makes sense or strikes a chord with any one ...
Since extracting and consuming the sacred medicine I've noticed the disappearance of my ego.
Pre Nexus and DMT I didn't know what the ego was .
I was never controlled by my ego but since it seems to have gone away I can definitely notice it.
I don't tell myself negative or positive things anymore and I feel a lot happier for it.
I seem get on better with people as well and have more of a laugh with them.
Also I tend not to react negatively to situations like I did pre DMT.
I'll give you an example.
Yesterday my brother sent me some nasty text messages .
Pre DMT I would have responded in kind and I would have let it eat away at me for some time .
But yesterday I didn't react at all , I ignored it and thought that the text messages were just a reflection of how miserable he must be and susceptible to his ego .
I think I can see people and situations more clearly and from an understanding position since DMT.
Would it be psychedelics in general or specifically DMT that promote growth within a person?
I have no experience with psychedelics apart from DMT apart from a few trips in my youth which I didn't like.
Do you guys remember yourselves before DMT and can you notice a change?

 

[Russian.dmt]

Sound like it only did you good.

I still did not try DMT yet, waiting on my first batch of MHRB....cant wait.

Hope it has this positive effect on me too!

 

[Adjhart]

Hey Delta,

You're not alone.

To answer one of your questions, it's not DMT specifically, but psychedelics in general that allow people to grow in this way. Terrence Mckenna says it best:

“Psychedelics are illegal not because a loving government is concerned that you may jump out of a third story window. Psychedelics are illegal because they dissolve opinion structures and culturally laid down models of behaviour and information processing. They open you up to the possibility that everything you know is wrong.”

I'm so happy for you, it's an amazing feeling to know that you're on the right path.

 

[kaaos]

nn-dmt or any substance for that matter can be a trigger and way of accessing consciousness, but that's just if the mind is ready.
although i feel that different series of alkaloids have had a great, positive impact on me, imo/ime all lessons and improvements are not the result of the substance rather the hard work of the mind which seems to be more open to improvement and change when in altered states and less biased and restricted.

that being said, one can use a dear substance in order to attain a better grasp into consciousness but to mantain it.. that's a different story.
it is easy to remain in peace with oneself and what surrounds after a wonderful and magickal trip, for some time, but then again it will come back to the usual egoic sphere if the mind isn't trained.

i now choose to make psychedelics a supplement to my understanding rather than looking at these substances as a direct flight to the akasha because those records are in me as much as they are in you, or anyone/anything else for that matter. train the mind and become an alchemist of the mental forces. no need to diminish your full potential and hide it behind a molecule. :thumb_up:

 

[Pickledpossum]

Since partaking in DMT over the last year or two , I've noticed a change within myself.
I just want to know if this makes sense or strikes a chord with any one ...
Since extracting and consuming the sacred medicine I've noticed the disappearance of my ego.
Pre Nexus and DMT I didn't know what the ego was .
I was never controlled by my ego but since it seems to have gone away I can definitely notice it.
I don't tell myself negative or positive things anymore and I feel a lot happier for it.
I seem get on better with people as well and have more of a laugh with them.
Also I tend not to react negatively to situations like I did pre DMT.
I'll give you an example.
Yesterday my brother sent me some nasty text messages .
Pre DMT I would have responded in kind and I would have let it eat away at me for some time .
But yesterday I didn't react at all , I ignored it and thought that the text messages were just a reflection of how miserable he must be and susceptible to his ego .
I think I can see people and situations more clearly and from an understanding position since DMT.
Would it be psychedelics in general or specifically DMT that promote growth within a person?
I have no experience with psychedelics apart from DMT apart from a few trips in my youth which I didn't like.
Do you guys remember yourselves before DMT and can you notice a change?

i hope this helps, but this is now WHY I ingest the strongest tryptamine known to man? It allows quantum mechanics to be possible within the brain at body temperature. It allows for understanding of connection between each other. I was born into this world 'under the influence'. It allows for leaching off others energy. It allows understanding through intelligence of the future. You feel others pain and happiness (good or bad, I've made my decision). You meet, others consciousness's before you meet their ego. Ego 'cannot' be a part of my life. Astral projection becomes the norm. Lucid Dreaming becomes easier as you develop the ability to 'hack' into the biological brain and memory bank. Animals are aware of your own awareness and understanding and more times than not, do not fear the human like the fear we have of the unknown.
You turn sapiosexual (attracted to ones intelligence rather than looks or 'personality'). Breakthrough meditation becomes more frequent. When failure from understanding occurs, you use your consciousness to alter perception (listen to the things you see, and to visually see logic). Telepathy is common, Manifestation of feelings both inward and outward occur. And total awareness of ones biological self. The ability to forget the feeling of physical pain. Perception, is perceived from infinite angles. Oh the one downside? I don't see things the way you would. I see YOU sometimes WELL BEFORE you have EVEN seen yourself.

'Drugs' as the uneducated call them, are a 'temporary fix to a long occurring problem'.

Tryptamines of breakthrough power, gives you the intellect to manifest a permanent FIX to solving problems.

Agree to disagree cause that's the first red flag indicating how closed minded you are. Argue with this, when you have no idea what it is I'm actually talking about, shows your ego is more vast than your intellect.

 

[pitubo]

^^^^^ I believe that the above is your birthright, it is your natural state. Something went wrong with humanity and we have become sidetracked or derailed somehow. Proper use of psychedelics can help to flush out the disease of the soul.

 

[Beyond Me]

..the above is your birthright, it is your natural state. Something went wrong with humanity and we have become sidetracked or derailed somehow. Proper use of psychedelics can help to flush out the disease of the soul.

Hit the nail on the head here. It's perfectly normal for anyone who awakens to feel a little alarmed at how we've been essentially missing the mark (the original word for sin: hamartia) for so long.

What runs this world (endless accruement of material objects) no longer runs you. You find joy in the moment, devoid of what you do in the moment, and this mentality (your natural state as pitubo stated) is quite literally the antithesis of a world dominated by doing and becoming something. These two movements obscure the fact that you're already whole.

For a very long time we've been told we were broken and we need to race to the finish by becoming something. When you use the spice you see you are standing on the finish line, and you were being deceived in ignorance of this fact. No worries, it served a purpose, it led you here!

 

[Cazman043]

I feel to claim the Ego has disappeared, is missing the point and simply a new subject which the ego has created and attached to. How can one know there is no ego? You must create separation for there to be ego. I think it would be better said that you have become more aware of your ego and thus can view it without having an objective opinion of right or wrong. Dmt, for myself as well as other psychedelics have enabled me to perceive the idea of self with new eyes. Which is understandable as it alters the perspective of the participant which means they can alter the idea of how they view themselves. This can be both "positive" and "negative" depending on how the individual perceives the experience. The experience itself seems to simply mirror your own conscious activity. If you are capable of slowing down thought and focus on what is, the mirror will reflect that, if you continue to think and get lost in these thoughts, the mirror will reflect that and you start seeing some horrid visual image in the external because it's a reflection of the internal.

 

[DeltaSpice]

Thanks for all your replies they are excellent , I appreciate all of them.
Cazman043 "How can one know there is no ego?"
Before discovering "Medicine" (DMT) from time to time I would beat myself up mentally , telling myself im not worthy and so on . Essentially depressing myself.
Over the past 18 months, since taking spice, I have not once done that to myself.
Don't get me wrong I was not a severe depressive but its just some thing that I've noticed.
I also recall my ex girlfriend saying to me that sometimes she feels like she's not good enough for anyone and other times she feels like she's too good for anyone .
Surely that's just the Ego talking to her and I know that kind of thing has left me.

Also from time to time, when feeling just normal and going about my business , I tell myself to cheer up and that I should be happier, I have so much to look forward to.
Yet alone the Changa waiting for me when I get home
Pre Spice I would never have thought like that.

I have always been an alternative type person. I like to ask big questions and answer them, Space, God, Gravity, life.
Its the little questions I have a problem with : What's a falafel ? What's a Turd Burglar ?
Seriously though it feels like spice is a perfect fit for me.
Sorry to turn this into the ME show.
All the best to you...

 

[Cazman043]

Brother, ego is what separates you as an entity from the world. Are you an individual experiencing the world or are you the world? The change is mood is a change in perspective, you could say you've moulded and shaped the ego into a tool rather than enemy but to dissolve ego is too go beyond the separation between you and your environment. Don't get me wrong, that too will come through you moulding the ego, but try not to get mixed up with the idea your ego has disappeared because that is a new way for the ego to disguise itself. Much love and well done on improving yourself. You must know yourself to go beyond yourself. Yourself is ego, but deep deep within that ego, as you shed the layers, you will find it is all a magnificent illusion. There is no I or me... There simply is THAT!

 

[DeltaSpice]

Brother, ego is what separates you as an entity from the world. Are you an individual experiencing the world or are you the world? The change is mood is a change in perspective, you could say you've moulded and shaped the ego into a tool rather than enemy but to dissolve ego is too go beyond the separation between you and your environment. Don't get me wrong, that too will come through you moulding the ego, but try not to get mixed up with the idea your ego has disappeared because that is a new way for the ego to disguise itself. Much love and well done on improving yourself. You must know yourself to go beyond yourself. Yourself is ego, but deep deep within that ego, as you shed the layers, you will find it is all a magnificent illusion. There is no I or me... There simply is THAT!

Thanks for the lesson.
So Ego is not just a small part of me, it is my entire "self".
I've always believed in learning and progressing, knowledge wise.
Now I'm doing it on deeper levels.

 

[Cazman043]

Ego is the conception of self. How can you know who you Are? How can you explain things with words? Word are mere symbolic, they are not a reality, are they not? To put reality in words, although beautiful and can be done, you must realise that it will never depict the true reality... It is impossible to do so... Maybe that is a reason why people struggle to explain dmt experiences is the fact the reality goes deeper than this 3dimensional realm, thus words cannot describe it. The fabrication and structure of the entire universe lives within you... Only you're playing the game it does
Not. Like playing a game of hide and seek. Like being an actor convincing not only the audience but themselves that they are actually acting. To shed ego is to realise that life and death are two ends of the same spectrum. That black implies white. That the self implies other. That you're it and the whole point of playing you're not it is to recognise yourself. Because how could you without an ego?

 

[VAdder]

Cazman's responses have been very good. One day in the future I'm sure you (OP) will reflect on this thread and realise (with a smile, I hope) how far you have come from the days when you would post something like:

"I was never controlled by my ego but since it seems to have gone away I can definitely notice it."

Never fall into this trap; you must understand how much you are, and always have been, acting from ego. You can't wake up until you know that you are asleep. Don't not make the mistake of imagining yourself to be wiser than you are, this error dooms so many people.

It sounds like you have made a change for the better, but you haven't yet achieved what you think you've achieved, and in all likelihood you might not ever do so - and neither will I. But trying your best is its own reward.

A movie that was largely panned, but I quite like, is Revolver. Give it a look, you may find it interesting and of relevance to your post.

Also, try Chapter IX: Self-Knowledge from Huxley's Perennial Philosophy. Read the whole book if you have the will to do so.

 

[poonja]

Perennial Philosophy started it all for me some 40 plus years ago.

 

[DeltaSpice]

Cazman's responses have been very good. One day in the future I'm sure you (OP) will reflect on this thread and realise (with a smile, I hope) how far you have come from the days when you would post something like:

"I was never controlled by my ego but since it seems to have gone away I can definitely notice it."

Never fall into this trap; you must understand how much you are, and always have been, acting from ego. You can't wake up until you know that you are asleep. Don't not make the mistake of imagining yourself to be wiser than you are, this error dooms so many people.

It sounds like you have made a change for the better, but you haven't yet achieved what you think you've achieved, and in all likelihood you might not ever do so - and neither will I. But trying your best is its own reward.

A movie that was largely panned, but I quite like, is Revolver. Give it a look, you may find it interesting and of relevance to your post.

Also, try Chapter IX: Self-Knowledge from Huxley's Perennial Philosophy. Read the whole book if you have the will to do so.

"""One day in the future I'm sure you (OP) will reflect on this thread and realise (with a smile, I hope) how far you have come from the days when you would post something like:

"I was never controlled by my ego but since it seems to have gone away I can definitely notice it.""""


I don't need to re visit this down the line and reflect because I can reflect rite now and say it was an ignorant thing to say .
What I've said so far is from my own assumptions , having never read books on the subject, these are the conclusions I came to.
From what you guys are telling me I now have a better understanding.
I've stopped being negative towards myself since DMT. I assumed (wrongly) that the part of me that told myself negative things has gone.
So what happened to my negativity? If its gone because I wanted it gone then it was done subconsciously .
Your gonna have to help me understand what happened please.

I have ordered Perennial Philosophy, unfortunately it will go on a pile that I'm desperate to read.

 

[Cazman043]

You've altered your perspective friend. You see things in a new light and so your negative views have been replaced by positive thinking. Look into 5meo-dmt if you'd like to read what ego death is. Read about ego itself, look into eastern philosophy on ego. It is the false self. An idea, and thus an illusion. How can you remove an illusion? It isn't real? There's nothing to remove! You can simply became aware of the positive and the negative which will then enable you too decide which path to take. Your journey is to follow your heart. It will give you a new step each time you peal back the layer. Imagine you are an onion, you continue to peel the layers trying to find the seed, but you will never find a core, it is all layers. You can go deeper and deeper, pealing these layers back, until you realise the whole game is to seek what's already there. You are the whole onion, as you shed the layers you realise that. Don't get me wrong though, seeking is the start. Then there is trying to stop seeking which is seeking in itself. Then there is giving up completely which is seeking in itself. Then there is observing your seeking mind, trying to search for some massive realisation. But you're already there. You've already been there. You already have it. It's just dissolving what's not and then in that you can experience what is. it's all persistence and patience, forgive, accept, let go.

 

[nndmteamwork]

Since partaking in DMT over the last year or two , I've noticed a change within myself.
I just want to know if this makes sense or strikes a chord with any one ...
Since extracting and consuming the sacred medicine I've noticed the disappearance of my ego.
Pre Nexus and DMT I didn't know what the ego was .

Don't worry after reading your post and the ones after I thought I didn't know what the ego was anymore. I wanted to point this part of your ego's post out because in the strongest breakthrough we do experience 'ego death' where temporarily we do not feel a connection to a human body or even memories of our human life. I don't think ego death is a great way of describing this because with dmt we always come back so maybe temporary 'ego loss' would be better. yet believing in our ability to temporarily go ego free by definition requires belief in the spirit(which is unproven by science) , so all of this is speculative religious malarkey!

 

[DeltaSpice]

Since partaking in DMT over the last year or two , I've noticed a change within myself.
I just want to know if this makes sense or strikes a chord with any one ...
Since extracting and consuming the sacred medicine I've noticed the disappearance of my ego.
Pre Nexus and DMT I didn't know what the ego was .

Don't worry after reading your post and the ones after I thought I didn't know what the ego was anymore. I wanted to point this part of your ego's post out because in the strongest breakthrough we do experience 'ego death' where temporarily we do not feel a connection to a human body or even memories of our human life. I don't think ego death is a great way of describing this because with dmt we always come back so maybe temporary 'ego loss' would be better. yet believing in our ability to temporarily go ego free by definition requires belief in the spirit(which is unproven by science) , so all of this is speculative religious malarkey!

There is some thing to it all though.
Psychedelics are a treatment for depression and depression seems to be caused by the person telling themselves negative things.
Telling yourself stuff, positive or negative is ego related.
Don't quote me on anything I've just said ,its all in a round about way

 

[Prana2020]

Ego is the conception of self. How can you know who you Are? How can you explain things with words? Word are mere symbolic, they are not a reality, are they not? To put reality in words, although beautiful and can be done, you must realise that it will never depict the true reality... It is impossible to do so... Maybe that is a reason why people struggle to explain dmt experiences is the fact the reality goes deeper than this 3dimensional realm, thus words cannot describe it. The fabrication and structure of the entire universe lives within you... Only you're playing the game it does
Not. Like playing a game of hide and seek. Like being an actor convincing not only the audience but themselves that they are actually acting. To shed ego is to realise that life and death are two ends of the same spectrum. That black implies white. That the self implies other. That you're it and the whole point of playing you're not it is to recognise yourself. Because how could you without an ego?

I agree with you, but when true consciousness is achieved with the awakening of the ajna, our ego is left in an insignificant and stagnant position. Because we've always been more than a mere face, before, during and after we're here.

 

[Cazman043]

I agree with you, but when true consciousness is achieved with the awakening of the ajna, our ego is left in an insignificant and stagnant position. Because we've always been more than a mere face, before, during and after we're here.[/quote]

And i too agree with what you are saying, you are correct, but isn't it a shame to say it is so?