Well my story with dmt began in the same way many people's does, with Strassman's the spirit molecule, although I just saw the documentary on Netflix like 15 years ago i would guess. At the time despite the fascinating accounts of the experiences, I found the idea quite terrifying. But the seed was planted.
Weed had ALWAYS been my medicine, sure it has some recreational value but above all else I consider it a powerful medicine and effective antidepressant.
I've had my share of battles with addictions over the years and i still currently take a few mgs of buprenorphine daily. Say what you will, that shit saved my life. I do however wish it was easier to quit. But I gotta go to work so
My history with psychedelics is quite short. I did my first real mushrooms when I was about 24 with my girlfriend at the time, now my wife, but at that time all they did was make me puke for several hours i wouldn't say I experienced anything that resembles what I would now consider "psychedelia" it was the dmt use taught me the meaning of the word and we'll get to that
I spent about 3 hours heaving up all the little shards of mushroom that I had ground up and swallowed with orange juice (never again
) with visions of mushrooms growing, melting, running down a drain. Over and over and over. Meanwhile my wife was looking at the wall laughing her ass off, which at least made me feel a little better
My mistake was taking 3.5g of dried cubes, everyone told me that's what you gotta do to get the full experience. That may be true to some extent, but i would not recommended an attempt to start at that level to say the least.
In the proceeding years I had a handful of mushroom trips, usually involving nausea and unpleasant body load. Really turned me off to shrooms.
Dmt came back into my attention just a few months ago, during a conversation where someone told me about [MOD EDIT - no source talk!] dmt vapes. I thought about trying to go get one but then I thought if they exist there must be a way to make one.
Eventually some mhrb powder came to my door (250g)
I found this website and studied all the teks until i felt like i had enough of a handle on the actual chemistry instead of just trying to follow a recipe.
I ended up settling on the q21 fluffy fun fest i wanted to avoid lye for various reasons that this allowed me to do that and get pure freebase for vaping
In the end i didn't calculate my exact yeild but about 2g total including the goey stuff . I would put a photo of my crystals jar but I'm still a little apprehensive about going the far.
The night of my trip I was of course very nervous, I was watching you know Joe Rogan and guests talk about their experiences and some Terrance McKenna, whom i find to be very interesting he certainly comes across as quite intelligent but I don't tend to put much stock in the machine elves thing, i just wanted to learn some of the history of the culture.
My wife was planning to join me and try it with me but she fell asleep so I ventured up to the bedroom to journey into the unknown alone.
I have smoked some salvia back when you could still buy it here so I am at least familiar with smoking something the rips your reality apart instantly, for what little that is worth
Anyways, I'm sitting on my bed in the dimly lit room I put the TV on and play one of favorite songs "cosmic" by avenged sevenfold. My favorite band and another reason for my rekindled interest in psychedelics.
I tried weighing a dose on the Amazon .001g scale i bought but nothing seemed to register as any amount of mass until I had quite a pile which made me nervous so I just eyeballed a much smaller amount of crystal into my puffco peak (not ideal i imagine, but it's what I've got and it does work) my only mistake in this case was using too much heat, didn't need the highest setting is what I learned..
I took the small hit and held it in. And I felt... something... a "come up" if you will but no visuals or real body load.
So i restarted my song and loaded up about idk 7x more crystals it WAS the right amount though, about 30mgs when I put an equal amount on a better scale later on...
I took the foul tasting vapor which tastes like mothballs I've come to realize since. I held it for only about 5 seconds. Some part of the back of my mind, chickened out, I knew deep down that Kansas was going fuckin BYE BYE if I didn't exhale lol so I did.
I instantly had the sensation of cresting the peak of a Rollercoaster and began descending rapidly brain first into a kaleidoscope of fractal colors. Like dipping my brain into a vat of what I always thought acid would feel like. Very intense body load. I immediately had a train of thought like "I can't believe I'M doing dmt . ME. right now. DMT! ... wait who or what am I in the first place??"
The next thing I remember i was trying to figure out if I had been breathing and tried to remind myself to do so. Focusing on the effort while trying to let go and not fight the trip. I had an impression at this moment of being greeted although it was only in hindsight I recognized the feeling. It was like walking into a classroom on the first day of school and all your friends are happy to see you...
I opened up my eyes to see the air having an electric green vibe to it. My hands looked like dead things that had been soaking in water. A thing I've heard described by others since. Added to the weirdness i couldn't really sense any love or anything like that it was like whatever emotion I had it was alien. Very very weird vibes
I started listening to the song again at this point as it passed the guitar solo and started to slow down.. I felt like I was under water, I tried to sing a little and it was like my voice was far away.
At a couple points I tried to close my eyes and remind myself to surrender to the experience. The intensity would quickly build to extreme levels and it felt like i was being smeared in a way across multiple dimensions. One foot in. One foot out.
At one point I experienced some pretty intense time dilation that was one of the coolest things I've ever heard. The music told me to "let it gooooo" and on the word go kept slowing down and down and down.. the same thing happened a couple more times as the song finished. I took a deep breathe and the room expanded, and came back to normal as I exhaled. Another first.
The waves of intensity gradually lessened and when the song calmed at the end i could tell i had been "released" by the dmt .. I continued having mild visuals for a little while like vines crawling in my carpet and such. I recall looking at my computer and watching reality itself warping like a yinyang symbol I suddenly understood the meaning of "psychedelic" . I finally UNDERSTOOD what fractals were. I had spent time among them, as part of them.
Even the next day I still felt quite high, music was incredibly beautiful. The afterglow faded into a kind of anxiety after a few days a sense of "i can never unsee what I've seen" but I just continued learning about these medicines and what they do for people and after a few more days I felt normal again
But not just normal. Improved. I can feel the neuroplasticity changing my thought patterns, in good ways. I love having new novel ideas and just thinking about existence and the mysteries of life. My taste in music has also changed, I'm enjoying things like shpongle that I just couldn't get my head around before.
However, my respect for the spice was also increased. I feel like it warned me I need to stop using weed like I do. And I also felt like it warned me against sharing it to people who may not be ready for such things. At the start of my journey I wanted to share the experience with as many people as possible but I learned this shit is HEAVY it's not for everyone, best left to people with the drive to seek it for whatever reason.
I've always heard the molecule will find you when you're ready for it. So, if i went out and extracted my own how do I know I was ready for it? I like to hope that being able to get mhrb is a sign the universe or whatever thinks I'm ready. Or maybe it's all nonsense. One thing i realized is that good many things are unknowable, best not to dwell on such things sometimes
I'm happy I worked up the nerve to finally post my experience, I can see there is a ton of wisdom here with you guys and you strike me as sincere decent folks. Glad to be here
Weed had ALWAYS been my medicine, sure it has some recreational value but above all else I consider it a powerful medicine and effective antidepressant.
I've had my share of battles with addictions over the years and i still currently take a few mgs of buprenorphine daily. Say what you will, that shit saved my life. I do however wish it was easier to quit. But I gotta go to work so
My history with psychedelics is quite short. I did my first real mushrooms when I was about 24 with my girlfriend at the time, now my wife, but at that time all they did was make me puke for several hours i wouldn't say I experienced anything that resembles what I would now consider "psychedelia" it was the dmt use taught me the meaning of the word and we'll get to that
I spent about 3 hours heaving up all the little shards of mushroom that I had ground up and swallowed with orange juice (never again
) with visions of mushrooms growing, melting, running down a drain. Over and over and over. Meanwhile my wife was looking at the wall laughing her ass off, which at least made me feel a little betterMy mistake was taking 3.5g of dried cubes, everyone told me that's what you gotta do to get the full experience. That may be true to some extent, but i would not recommended an attempt to start at that level to say the least.
In the proceeding years I had a handful of mushroom trips, usually involving nausea and unpleasant body load. Really turned me off to shrooms.
Dmt came back into my attention just a few months ago, during a conversation where someone told me about [MOD EDIT - no source talk!] dmt vapes. I thought about trying to go get one but then I thought if they exist there must be a way to make one.
Eventually some mhrb powder came to my door (250g)
I found this website and studied all the teks until i felt like i had enough of a handle on the actual chemistry instead of just trying to follow a recipe.
I ended up settling on the q21 fluffy fun fest
i wanted to avoid lye for various reasons that this allowed me to do that and get pure freebase for vapingIn the end i didn't calculate my exact yeild but about 2g total including the goey stuff . I would put a photo of my crystals jar but I'm still a little apprehensive about going the far.
The night of my trip I was of course very nervous, I was watching you know Joe Rogan and guests talk about their experiences and some Terrance McKenna, whom i find to be very interesting he certainly comes across as quite intelligent but I don't tend to put much stock in the machine elves thing, i just wanted to learn some of the history of the culture.
My wife was planning to join me and try it with me but she fell asleep so I ventured up to the bedroom to journey into the unknown alone.
I have smoked some salvia back when you could still buy it here so I am at least familiar with smoking something the rips your reality apart instantly, for what little that is worth
Anyways, I'm sitting on my bed in the dimly lit room I put the TV on and play one of favorite songs "cosmic" by avenged sevenfold. My favorite band and another reason for my rekindled interest in psychedelics.
I tried weighing a dose on the Amazon .001g scale i bought but nothing seemed to register as any amount of mass until I had quite a pile which made me nervous
so I just eyeballed a much smaller amount of crystal into my puffco peak (not ideal i imagine, but it's what I've got and it does work) my only mistake in this case was using too much heat, didn't need the highest setting is what I learned..I took the small hit and held it in. And I felt... something... a "come up" if you will but no visuals or real body load.
So i restarted my song and loaded up about idk 7x more crystals
it WAS the right amount though, about 30mgs when I put an equal amount on a better scale later on...I took the foul tasting vapor which tastes like mothballs I've come to realize since. I held it for only about 5 seconds. Some part of the back of my mind, chickened out, I knew deep down that Kansas was going fuckin BYE BYE if I didn't exhale lol so I did.
I instantly had the sensation of cresting the peak of a Rollercoaster and began descending rapidly brain first into a kaleidoscope of fractal colors. Like dipping my brain into a vat of what I always thought acid would feel like. Very intense body load. I immediately had a train of thought like "I can't believe I'M doing dmt . ME. right now. DMT! ... wait who or what am I in the first place??"
The next thing I remember i was trying to figure out if I had been breathing and tried to remind myself to do so. Focusing on the effort while trying to let go and not fight the trip. I had an impression at this moment of being greeted although it was only in hindsight I recognized the feeling. It was like walking into a classroom on the first day of school and all your friends are happy to see you...
I opened up my eyes to see the air having an electric green vibe to it. My hands looked like dead things that had been soaking in water. A thing I've heard described by others since. Added to the weirdness
i couldn't really sense any love or anything like that it was like whatever emotion I had it was alien. Very very weird vibesI started listening to the song again at this point as it passed the guitar solo and started to slow down.. I felt like I was under water, I tried to sing a little and it was like my voice was far away.
At a couple points I tried to close my eyes and remind myself to surrender to the experience. The intensity would quickly build to extreme levels and it felt like i was being smeared in a way across multiple dimensions. One foot in. One foot out.
At one point I experienced some pretty intense time dilation that was one of the coolest things I've ever heard. The music told me to "let it gooooo" and on the word go kept slowing down and down and down.. the same thing happened a couple more times as the song finished. I took a deep breathe and the room expanded, and came back to normal as I exhaled. Another first.
The waves of intensity gradually lessened and when the song calmed at the end i could tell i had been "released" by the dmt .. I continued having mild visuals for a little while like vines crawling in my carpet and such. I recall looking at my computer and watching reality itself warping like a yinyang symbol I suddenly understood the meaning of "psychedelic" . I finally UNDERSTOOD what fractals were. I had spent time among them, as part of them.
Even the next day I still felt quite high, music was incredibly beautiful. The afterglow faded into a kind of anxiety after a few days a sense of "i can never unsee what I've seen" but I just continued learning about these medicines and what they do for people and after a few more days I felt normal again
But not just normal. Improved. I can feel the neuroplasticity changing my thought patterns, in good ways. I love having new novel ideas and just thinking about existence and the mysteries of life. My taste in music has also changed, I'm enjoying things like shpongle that I just couldn't get my head around before.
However, my respect for the spice was also increased. I feel like it warned me I need to stop using weed like I do. And I also felt like it warned me against sharing it to people who may not be ready for such things. At the start of my journey I wanted to share the experience with as many people as possible but I learned this shit is HEAVY it's not for everyone, best left to people with the drive to seek it for whatever reason.
I've always heard the molecule will find you when you're ready for it. So, if i went out and extracted my own how do I know I was ready for it? I like to hope that being able to get mhrb is a sign the universe or whatever thinks I'm ready. Or maybe it's all nonsense. One thing i realized is that good many things are unknowable, best not to dwell on such things sometimes
I'm happy I worked up the nerve to finally post my experience, I can see there is a ton of wisdom here with you guys and you strike me as sincere decent folks. Glad to be here
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Its weaker than divinorum but still usable as a drug 
