Funny pictures.

[Jagube]

 

[Pandora]

This is one way to secure a license plate . . .

 

[Pandora]

Seen at a customer's house. . .

 

[Pandora]

This could be a problem while driving.

 

[Mitakuye Oyasin]

 

[new_science]

 

[Mitakuye Oyasin]

In respect for the passing of Chuck Norris, I present the top 50 Chuck Norris jokes. Rest In Peace friend.

1. Chuck Norris doesn't do push-ups. He pushes the Earth down.
2. Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
3. Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.
4. Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch. He decides what time it is.
5. When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
6. Chuck Norris was once bitten by a cobra. After several days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.
7. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he's never cried.
8. Death once had a near-Chuck Norris experience.
9. Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
10. Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He waits.
11. If you can see Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
12. Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
13. Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay's potato chip.
14. Most people fear the Reaper. Chuck Norris considers him a promising rookie.
15. God said, "Let there be light." Chuck Norris replied, "Say please."
16. Chuck Norris once uppercut a horse. You're welcome—we now have giraffes.
17. There is no Ctrl key on Chuck Norris's keyboard. Chuck Norris is always in control.
18. Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death. He wins fair and square.
19. Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
20. Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
21. Chuck Norris built the cabin he was born in... with his bare hands.
22. Someone once tried to make toilet paper with Chuck Norris's face on it, but it was rejected because Chuck Norris doesn't take crap from anybody.
23. Chuck Norris doesn't go swimming. Water just wants to be around him.
24. Chuck Norris can parallel park a train.
25. Chuck Norris can speak Braille.
26. Chuck Norris once got in a fight with a VCR. Now we have DVDs.
27. Chuck Norris can unscramble an egg.
28. The flu gets a Chuck Norris shot every year.
29. Chuck Norris doesn't need a password. Websites ask him to verify who he is.
30. Chuck Norris can overflow your stack just by looking at it.
31. Chuck Norris counted to infinity... twice.
32. Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet. He scares the crap out of it.
33. Chuck Norris can drown a fish.
34. Chuck Norris can make a snowman out of rain.
35. Chuck Norris plays Jenga with Stonehenge.
36. Ghosts tell Chuck Norris stories around the campfire.
37. Chuck Norris made a Happy Meal cry.
38. Chuck Norris doesn't dial the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.
39. Google doesn't search for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris tells Google what to find.
40. Chuck Norris can hear sign language.
41. Chuck Norris once shot an enemy plane down with his finger, by yelling "Bang!"
42. On the 7th day, God rested. Then Chuck Norris took over.
43. Chuck Norris can slam shut a revolving door.
44. Chuck Norris doesn't hunt because hunting implies the possibility of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
45. Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.
46. Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass... at night.
47. Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
48. Chuck Norris once stared at the sun too long. The sun went blind.
49. Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris decided to punch his way out of his mother's womb.
50. Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow. The light is too afraid to stand behind him.

 

[new_science]

 

[bezevo]

YES ......HOWDY NOW !

 

[Jagube]

 

[Transform]

In respect for the passing of Chuck Norris, I present the top 50 Chuck Norris jokes. Rest In Peace friend.

1. Chuck Norris doesn't do push-ups. He pushes the Earth down.
2. Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
3. Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.
4. Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch. He decides what time it is.
5. When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
6. Chuck Norris was once bitten by a cobra. After several days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.
7. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he's never cried.
8. Death once had a near-Chuck Norris experience.
9. Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
10. Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He waits.
11. If you can see Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
12. Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
13. Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay's potato chip.
14. Most people fear the Reaper. Chuck Norris considers him a promising rookie.
15. God said, "Let there be light." Chuck Norris replied, "Say please."
16. Chuck Norris once uppercut a horse. You're welcome—we now have giraffes.
17. There is no Ctrl key on Chuck Norris's keyboard. Chuck Norris is always in control.
18. Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death. He wins fair and square.
19. Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
20. Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
21. Chuck Norris built the cabin he was born in... with his bare hands.
22. Someone once tried to make toilet paper with Chuck Norris's face on it, but it was rejected because Chuck Norris doesn't take crap from anybody.
23. Chuck Norris doesn't go swimming. Water just wants to be around him.
24. Chuck Norris can parallel park a train.
25. Chuck Norris can speak Braille.
26. Chuck Norris once got in a fight with a VCR. Now we have DVDs.
27. Chuck Norris can unscramble an egg.
28. The flu gets a Chuck Norris shot every year.
29. Chuck Norris doesn't need a password. Websites ask him to verify who he is.
30. Chuck Norris can overflow your stack just by looking at it.
31. Chuck Norris counted to infinity... twice.
32. Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet. He scares the crap out of it.
33. Chuck Norris can drown a fish.
34. Chuck Norris can make a snowman out of rain.
35. Chuck Norris plays Jenga with Stonehenge.
36. Ghosts tell Chuck Norris stories around the campfire.
37. Chuck Norris made a Happy Meal cry.
38. Chuck Norris doesn't dial the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.
39. Google doesn't search for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris tells Google what to find.
40. Chuck Norris can hear sign language.
41. Chuck Norris once shot an enemy plane down with his finger, by yelling "Bang!"
42. On the 7th day, God rested. Then Chuck Norris took over.
43. Chuck Norris can slam shut a revolving door.
44. Chuck Norris doesn't hunt because hunting implies the possibility of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
45. Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.
46. Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass... at night.
47. Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
48. Chuck Norris once stared at the sun too long. The sun went blind.
49. Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris decided to punch his way out of his mother's womb.
50. Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow. The light is too afraid to stand behind him.

#12 and #43 are virtually the same. Chuck Norris demands a replacement.

 

[Mitakuye Oyasin]

Good catch Transform, thanks. I heard Chuck carried his own casket at his funeral. That's got to be worth something, right?