Kraken jokes

[The Kraken]

Two muffins in an oven. One says, "damn, it's hot in here," and the other responds, "Holy shit! A talking muffin!"

 

[ommani]

Two Krakens walk into a bar. Bartender says, what’s with all the tentacles? Kraken #1 eats the bartender. Kraken #2 uses nonviolent communication to express his dismay to Kraken #1. Kraken #1 eats Kraken #2. Moral of the story - you mess with The Kraken, you get the tentacles

 

[Voidmatrix]

What do you get when you cross a donkey and a deer?

Dat ass doe

 

[ommani]

What did The Kraken say to The Loch Ness Monster? You taste delicious.

 

[Sakkadelic]

You guys are kraken me up

 

[ommani]

What did the Kraken say to the Yeti? First tracks bruh, let’s get it.

 

[ommani]

What did the Kraken say to Ronald McDonald? You have promoted unhealthy food options to children for many years. I’m not a child, thus I shall eat you, instead of a Big Mac.

 

[ommani]

What did the Kraken say to Steven Seagal? You have dishonored the genre of reggae music and must now face your doom.

 

[The Kraken]

Wtf is this blasphemy! Guess I'm swimming to someone's house for a late night snack...

 

[ommani]

What did the Kraken say to Mike Tyson? You have smoked the venom of too many toads, now the Kraken is here to smoke you.

 

[ommani]

What did the Kraken say to Snow, the Canadian reggae singer? You get a pass, now go and sin no more.

 

[ommani]

What did the Kraken say to Godzilla? Real recognize real, now pass me that fire so we can spark this blunt.

 

[Pandora]

What do you call a duck with tentacles? A Quaken

 

[The Kraken]

What do you call a duck with tentacles? A Quaken

 

[The Kraken]

What did the Kraken say to Godzilla? Real recognize real, now pass me that fire so we can spark this blunt.

Great
to
Read
In
An
Afterglow

 

[The Kraken]

This one is better.

 

[Transform]

What do you call a duck with tentacles? A Quaken

I misread 'testicles' at first - but with both, might it be a draken? If so, will it also breathe fire (and I'm looking forward to the graphic for this )

 

[The Kraken]

I misread 'testicles' at first - but with both, might it be a draken? If so, will it also breathe fire (and I'm looking forward to the graphic for this )

 

[ommani]

What did the Kraken say to King Kong? You can’t heal your soul by running away from your problems, now come down from that building and tell me what’s goin’ on.

 

[Pandora]

It is impossible to win a debate with a Kraken. They always have a leg up.