Need help with integrating life lessons

[The Electric Hippy]

I am having some difficulties integrating some of the life lessons that psychadelics have shown me, such as changing my diet, certain attitudes, regaining lost compassion for mankind, etc. I've read the posts on integrating tips and I understand WHAT I have to do, I just feel so overwhelmed by all the things that I need to change, that I am having a hard time finding motivation to work on any of them, and I am also having difficulty understanding HOW to change these things. For example, one of the habits I need to change is I think out loud a lot, almost like I'm talking to myself. I've been doing it ever since I was young, and I just don't know to stop. What are some ways I could go about changing these habits? Is there literature I can read? If so, does anyone here know of any?

Also, does anyone here have any tips on how to deal with low motivation levels?

Thanks guys,

Electric.

 

[d-T-r]

I am having some difficulties integrating some of the life lessons that psychadelics have shown me, such as changing my diet, certain attitudes, regaining lost compassion for mankind, etc. I've read the posts on integrating tips and I understand WHAT I have to do, I just feel so overwhelmed by all the things that I need to change, that I am having a hard time finding motivation to work on any of them, and I am also having difficulty understanding HOW to change these things. For example, one of the habits I need to change is I think out loud a lot, almost like I'm talking to myself. I've been doing it ever since I was young, and I just don't know to stop. What are some ways I could go about changing these habits? Is there literature I can read? If so, does anyone here know of any?

Also, does anyone here have any tips on how to deal with low motivation levels?

Thanks guys,

Electric.

Break down what you feel need's changing or addressing into smaller more 'manageable' pieces.

I personally feel that it's very easy for the mind to get caught up in traps of it's own ideals which can sometimees help instigate change, but can also lead to never accepting what already currently 'is' because the mind is constantly focusing on what 'could be'

As for compassion for the mankind, Focus on compasion for yourself firstly, and in time you will regain it for mankind. This is a whole shared journey remember. We don't exist indepdndly from Mankind/society, so if we lack compassion or empathy for mankind, we are lacking compassion and empathy for our extended self and the only enviroment in which our own self knows.

____

Everyone must find their own path, but searching out the wisdom and thoughts of others who have achieved the states of mind and states of being you desire is a useful way of learning and integrating what they teach into your own practice/life.

As for the speaking out loud thing, the one thing that came to mind is to try and attempt to go 1 day, or even 2 or 3 without talking at all. This is actually a practice people do for sometimes long periods of times. It may be diffuclt but along the way, you may encounter the root issue of what causes you to do it, or you may come to completely different insights all together.

)))))

The constant assertion of belief
is an indication of fear.

Real learning comes about
when the competitive spirit has ceased,
that this outer journey
is really an inner calling.

If we can really understand the problem,
the answer will come out of it,
because the answer is not separate from the problem.

Find out for yourself
what are the possessions and ideals
that you do not desire.

By knowing what you do not want,
by elimination,
you will unburden the mind,
and only then will it understand
the essential which is ever there.

If you begin to understand what you are
without trying to change it,
then what you are undergoes a transformation.

~ Jiddu Krishnamurti ~"​

 

[hixidom]

Learning how to integrate life lessons is perhaps the most important life lesson. By definition, life lessons are learned from life (and life alone, in my opinion). If I were to tell you something to help you understand or apply a life lesson, it would not longer be a life lesson. What I'm trying to say is that learning how to do this on your own is part of the lesson.

Regarding motivation: Do you enjoy anything? If so, why are you not eager to do that thing more? Do you admire anybody? Why are you not eager to be more like them? Joy and admiration are two good motivating factors. What exactly are you not motivated about and, if you don't enjoy it, why do you want to get motivated about it? Perhaps you are not motivated because it has not occurred to you that life is a competition for limited resources, and those who work harder than everybody else will get more of those resources. On the other hand, if you are happy with "just enough", then that is not "lack of motivation"; It's bliss, and there's nothing wrong with choosing that over the types of comforts that culture and evolution have programmed us to want.

 

[The Electric Hippy]

@d-T-r: Thank you. I often feel like my mind falls into the latter catagory of focusing on what could be, rather than what is. It often causes me to not enjoy things I otherwise might. Perhaps this is something to add to the rather long list of things to change. I've also considered doing the no talking thing for a few days before, but never got around to it. I will try to find a day to do that

@hixidom: It is not so much that I don't enjoy anything, it's wanting to enjoy certain things that are good for me more. For example, exercise. I HATE excercise. I always have, even as a little kid. But I know if I want to be healthy, I must excercise. Same with cooking. I don't like cooking, but if I don't quit eating processed/fast food, there are serious consequences for those actions. Basically, I'm trying to find ways to be more motivated to do healthy activities rather than unhealthy activities.

 

[No Knowing]

Electric Hippy, It sounds to me like you are holding onto and identifying with your "old" self and this is preventing your new self from coming to the front. There is no permanent "Me" you must allow changes to flow with your life.

Labeling yourself as someone who "hates exercise" since childhood will make exercise VERY difficult. If you are beginning to feel a need to exercise it seems to me like you are moving past the hate for physical work and are realizing you will feel way BETTER when you exercise. Don't go lift weights or run if those are boring to you. Find a sport or game you love to play and play it ALOT. Or just walk at a brisk pace for a few hours exploring a park or town.

Processed food is what your mind thinks it needs. The high fat and sugar content of these foods fools your mind into believing it is getting a meal of high nutritional value. But think about how you feel AFTER eating these poor food substitutes. BAD. When you eat fresh fruits or vegetables the taste is good [yet not up to par with food additive super flavors like Anchovy Pizza Cheese Goo Combos or whatever] and after eating fruits and veggies your body feels BETTER than before you ate. Pay attention to this feeling and you will find yourself drawn away from eating those processed foods that slow your body and brain down.

These two specific changes you talk about go together, exercise more and you will want a healthier diet; eat healthier and you will want to exercise more.

Also for motivation only smoke pot at night after you finish a productive day. Or take a break from pot all together.

For slowing the monkey mind try meditating there are thousands of methods find one that you enjoy and work on it.

Change is good!:thumb_up:

 

[anrchy]

I don't agree that telling someone techniques on how to change certain aspects of themself is not learning. You still have to learn how to do such things and understanding how someone else has been able to will only give you more perspective on the mechanics of it.

It's true, I believe, that the hardest part is figuring out how to go about making a change. The technique will be different for each thing for each person. More things play a role than you might think. But I can def give you some pointers and have to say "no knowing" is right on track and very correct in his understanding.

Ill touch base on the two you described, thinking outloud and low motivation levels.

First of all, and this is all IMO, you need to find what triggers you to start thinking outloud. Become hyper aware of your thought process before during and after. The more you do this the more you will "see" your thoughts. I'm assuming you don't verbalize every single thought, so figure out what the difference is between the thoughts that do become verbal as opposed to the ones that stay internal.

When you find the root thought process that is directly followed by an outloud thought you will have discovered where you need to start. When you notice that thought process attempt to learn to predict when it is going to happen. This takes practice but you will if you work at it. Once you can atleast understand that it's there focus on changing the path of your thought process during that time so that you are consciously making it into a internal thought. Learn to catch yourself mid sentence. The more you practice this the earlier you will catch it. Eventually catching it before it happens.

For example, I often interrupt people. I learned to sense the feeling I get right before I start to interrupt someone. Sometimes it goes without notice but I have learned to try and catch myself while I am interrupting as well. So basically I will get out only a partial sentence, then I will apologize and tell them to please continue. This then becomes common practice and automatic. And you get better at it the more often you catch yourself. Sometimes I catch myself before I even begin to interrupt and tell myself in my head, Don't Interupt".

Low motivation. I am currently suffering from this. For me it is due to the fact that my current and past activities either are not as enjoyable, for different reason, or I have no one to do them with. One of the reasons I have found some to not be as enjoyable is because I am learning how to rid myself of so many projects and hobbies ect that I have acquired and after a few DMT doses have less passion for things that were mostly just "instant gratification". I am finding myself again so I have to find my new passions. Since I have been "reset" so to speak its difficult to motivate myself when I have no passion to drive me.

I'm currently struggling with this but my current idea, one that I am just now implementing, is forcing myself to try new things. Things that seem like I might enjoy them, will put me around people, allow me to quinch my thirst to learn. Motivation itself is easy because its mostly physical. Trick yiur mind. Tell it ya I don't wanna, but as you say this, not outloud hehe, get up with your body and do it anyways. I dunno. Try it.

I have other ideas so if you post more problems I'm happy to assist in giving you ideas.

 

[The Electric Hippy]

@ No knowing: Very thoughtful post. I will reflect on all you've said, but I'd like to point out that I am a very casual pot user; I only smoke about 2 grams a month (normally over the course of 2-3 days, and when I run out, I wait anywhere from 3-6 weeks before I buy more).

@anrchy: I've actually known the root cause of my issue for quite some time. It's caused when I find myself wanting to talk about a particular topic I'm thinking of but there is no one around to speak to about it (I'm at work, friend isn't answering phone, etc.) It often happens when I see something that bothers me, usually people treating others poorly. But it can also happen if I think of something funny, or I'm just in a philosophical mood.

I will try my best to start becoming aware of when I'm about to do this.

Thank you guys so much for your posts. It's really given me some new insight as to how I might solve these problems.

 

[hug46]

It's caused when I find myself wanting to talk about a particular topic I'm thinking of but there is no one around to speak to about it (I'm at work, friend isn't answering phone, etc.) It often happens when I see something that bothers me, usually people treating others poorly. But it can also happen if I think of something funny, or I'm just in a philosophical mood.

You are not perfect and that is beautiful in itself and if you have a habit of talking to yourself on occasion you are probly having a discussion with the best person you know.

 

[ZenSpice]

I agree.. Nikola Tesla reportedly used to talk to himself, so I would say you are in GOOD company :thumb_up:

 

[The Electric Hippy]

Hey guys, just wanted to drop in and give you an update on how I've been doing.

I recently had my 24th birthday. Up until then I was going through some major depression and a few other issues. I went to the beach and consumed 6g of cubenis (which turned out to be inactive; I don't think I dried them correctly) and did some meditation. I also had a few back to back high dose LSD trips over that weekend. At one point, I was in my backyard meditating and I begin to think of some of the issues in my life that I had previously deemed "unsolvable". I thought to myself "I wish I could do something about these issues". And right when I thought that, the most amazing thing happened! I heard a woman's voice say "Then do something about it". I don't know who she was. I had never heard her voice before. But it gave me a tremedous amount of hope and motivation. Since then, I've been in a great mood, and I've begun to exercise and eat lots of fresh vegtables and fruit at work instead of the processed garbage I was eating. The changes are coming slowly but surely, and right now, my life is amazing and very little could make it better right now.

I want to thank everyone for their advice and taking the time to post here. You guys really mean a lot to me, and I wish I had more time to read and post here at the Nexus.

 

[Metanoia]

Glad to hear you've taken the steps to make positive changes in your life!

I wanted to address the talking out loud concern.

I have been doing the same thing since early childhood, to the point where my parents thought I might have some mental disorder. I guess it can sound like I'm talking to someone who isn't there, and they thought I was hearing voices or hallucinating or something. Everyone that has ever been close to me has expressed some concern about it.

I went an entire week without speaking. I internalized the thoughts rather than expressing them verbally. By the end of the week, I felt like I was thinking at double speed. It was a very interesting experiment. But I still continue to talk to myself, sometimes in situations where it isn't appropriate I suppose it could be called a bad habit. But I don't see it that way. It makes people uncomfortable sometimes, but if I feel like I need to verbalize something to think it through, I do it.

That week of silence did help me to not always rely on thinking out loud. If it's something you really want, or need, to get control of, that might be an option. Not necessarily a full week, but a day here and there might have the same effect.

Sounds like you're doing well anyhow.

 

[The Electric Hippy]

@Dioxippus: Thank you for the well wishes!

I live too social of a life to not speak for a week (even a single day would be very difficult, as I interact with my family quite a bit) but I really want to try that sometime. Maybe I should set a date and do it.

@hug46: I've read your post more than any other on here and I want to let you know that what you wrote has really touched me. No one has ever told me that it was a beautiful thing. That sentence alone has made my day quite a few times, actually. Thank you so much.