'nother old dude joining

[roninsina]

I'll try my best to be brief and also candid...I had something of a mind fracturing childhood. An inaccessible cognitive dissonance had been on the periphery well into my adulthood. I did enjoy a tight group of friends in my teens and we used lsd and psilocybin in ways that we all found rewarding and therapeutic, even if the high was sometimes only the relief of finally coming down.

For a variety of reasons, I enlisted for military service and did a tour in the middle east where I was exposed to many forces that are usually veiled from consensus reality. I was also exposed to serin et al and for some time (several years) was unable to produce butrylcholinesterase and therefore, exposure to anything from roach poison to latex paint would send me into a hellish plane of existence.

For much of my time during the following decade I traveled and focused on self exploration with periods of heavy lsd usage and later found raw food and meditation. This period culminated in a couple of extended trips through central and south America where the highlight was a few weeks spent with a Shipibo ayahuasca maestro.

Fourteen years have passed since those first nights in the Peruvian Amazon and I now have a very happy marriage and three young children who bring me joy like nothing has before.

With the exception of a "recent" (two years ago) and inspiring experience with san pedro and one of the friends from the first paragraph, entheogens have played no direct role in my life for these many years. Of course, until now.

A serendipitous chain of events lead me here to the nexus a few months ago, where I have much enjoyed time on a nearly daily basis. I extracted a small free sample of mhrb from a vendor and had a quite moving experience a few weeks ago. I will post in the "first steps in hyperspace" when time allows but, am eager to document this before it gets overwhelmed by a second experience.

I'm also quite thrilled with the creative approaches to ecologically friendly/sustainable extraction and am looking forward to a fall harvest of my local desmanthus illinoensis and leptolobus (where, unfortunately, naptha ia a must?).

I have been offered fb dmt a few times over the years (and even a chance to meet Trout and Ott) but, was never ready until now. It's also my first time joining an online community. Very pleased and proud to make your acquaintance.

 

[Hieronymous]

Welcome to the Nexus

It sounds you've been through hell with the deployment and the poisoning that came with it. I hope you're getting some relief from all the problems it created.

I could be well off the mark here as I've never been in a war zone but do you think a war zone is in any way analogous to a psychedelic experience ?

I envisage a scenario that would be so different to living in a stable country that you'd experience a surreal type of disjointed reality. Fighter jets, laser guided missiles, gunfire & the knowledge that death could be around any corner - all that would have my head spinning harder than anything I'd experience at home. A psychedelic experience would be the only way I'd ever experience that level of displacement of my senses.

Serendipity seems to play a disproportionate role with DMT for some reason, it's almost like the molecule seeks out those that are ready for it.

 

[Shanghigher]

Welcome, Ronin!

Welcome to the community :thumb_up: I'm not much of an online community guy myself, but we do have a good bunch here, and I hope you find it a worthwhile experience.

 

[DreaMTripper]

As are we proud to make your aquaintance Welcome aboard i hope you can further your knowledge and that our favourite molecule can help you to continue to heal. You will fit right in here im sure of that and Yes promotion vote is already done.
Using FASA/FASW and paste and pull is a good compromise between effectiveness and eco freindly that many use if your not keen on naptha.

 

[roninsina]

I would definitely say that I experienced much of my time in the war zone as a psychedelic experience, Hieronymous. It was very thinly under the veil. The perceptibility of dark entities within certain higher officials was quite tangible; as were there a collective group of countermeasures by folks who brought the light. I believed (and still do) that a geographic awareness of location, a vast and well distributed pattern, was shared by those who were beings of light. The disruptive energy emitted by the tanks with depleted uranium hulls on the stone at Mecca while we invaded during Ramadan was another perception I still believe today. Many encounters of this nature and some directly with entities that were, at least in a cursory way, verified by others present (call me crazy).

I no longer exhibit symptoms from my exposures to nerve gas. I followed the advice of many learned folks for such matters (or the effects coincidentally wore off).

Other healing happens when it needs to, I have a happy life now.

Thank you for the welcome Shanghigher. And thanks for the vote Dreamtripper. I haven't found a ready supply (not online) of fumaric acid as of yet. I was under the impression that the only way to easily rid a desmanthus extraction from hordenine and gramine was naptha (incorrect?). Yes, our favorite molecule has already done some healing I couldn't have known i needed until it was already facilitating itself.

 

[Hieronymous]

Wow that's deep man.

I've never been involved in any conflict on that level, but I have perceived dark entities on both sides of the the conflict from the snippets I've seen in the media - Donald Rumsfeld and his Muslim counterparts come to mind when I reflect upon it.

From your personal perspective do you feel that that the balance of light to dark entities is swayed towards any particular side in the military (light to dark entities from either side) in that sort of situation ?

 

[Pandora]

Welcome to the Nexus roninsha. Great to have another middle aged/experienced person join this ever growing community.

Did you use one of the teks here when you did your extraction? What did you work with? 100 grams? How was your yield?

I find it fascinating how folks who are in middle or later life find their way to or come back to entheogens. I think we seek answers that are not found in consensual reality's offers such as impotent, indirect religions, ineffective, side-effect rich drugs, expensive, long lasting and often not very satisfying therapy, etc.. Answers about ourselves, those around us and the cycles we play things out in.

Regardless, great to see you here. Again, welcome.

 

[null24]

Welcome to the Nexus roninsha. Great to have another middle aged/experienced person join this ever growing community.

...and a bit later...

I find it fascinating how folks who are in middle or later life find their way to or come back to entheogens. I think we seek answers that are not found in consensual reality's offers such as impotent, indirect religions, ineffective, side-effect rich drugs, expensive, long lasting and often not very satisfying therapy, etc.. Answers about ourselves, those around us and the cycles we play things out in.

Couldn't agree more with both of those sentiments, P.

So yeah, welcome to the nexus,H, here you may find the hyperspacial cartographic resources you may be looking for...

 

[roninsina]

I would first like to add a qualifier to anything more I add to a discussion of this nature, Hieronymous. I am always willing to view things from an empirical perspective (or any other perspective) and have found science is always a good place to take refuge when I'm outmatched in the "spirit realms". That being said, you and I would appear to be kindred in these matters so I'll indulge myself.

From my perspective, the darker your nature, the faster you rose though the ranks. High ranking officers would often harbor dark and powerful entities. The nature of the sociopathic mind made for an excellent interface for the most malevolent of beings. There appeared to be some unspoken understanding of this on an official level. The structure was certainly designed to favor darkness. There are however, (or were...this is 23 years ago for me) a very well organized group of beings who can employ countermeasures and foil the more grandiose of dark intentions.

Which reminds me of an old joke you may not have heard. Cheney and Rumsfeld are drowning and you can only save one of them. What kind of sandwich do you make?

Pandora: I have very much enjoyed awakening certain analytical parts of my mind. Reading through the teks has has yielded more understanding with every effort. It has prompted me to covet analytical lab equipment; shopping ebay for a column. lol. My first extraction was rather modest. A free sample of 5 grams mhrb with the purchase of a small batch of a. peregrina seeds. I was trying to decide if i wanted to buy a bufo toad and thought i better try 5HO first, since they can live for 15 years. However, the consensus appeared to be that milking the toads would cause them a lot of pain and stress so I trashed the idea.

I used Cyb's salt tek for simplicities sake and yielded 68mg (there was more but I watched an unknown quantity blow away with the initial blast of fan drying) and a little more than twice that again of not very active yellow goo with my second set of combined pulls. I did the whole thing in a spice jar (no poetry intended) and recovered my one teaspoon pulls with an eye dropper, combined and freeze precipitated. I decided to start small and vaped 15mg (I dropped the 20 bucks and got a mg scale) using an amalgam of Gibran II's invention. I dug up an old glass pipe I had stored away (haven't been an mj smoker for almost 20 years) and put some copper scrubber in the bottom, a little "enhanced" leaf on top, premelted my 15mg yellow crystal on top of that with my new cigar lighter, and capped it with a ceramic flavor disc. My original intention was to melt the yellow crystal onto the smaller disc and cap with the larger but, it wouldn't fit in my pipe that way.

I find it has liberated me from the same sorts of fears I remember you mentioning. The constant nagging horror of imminent threat to my children from this crumbling and stressed power structure. And i don't feel I ever really left entheogens, my "return" is more of a need for a facilitator that's been lacking.

Hyperspacial cartographic resources, 024? I haven't recalled that imagery so clearly in many years. Thanks for the bump.

And thanks all for the warm welcome.

 

[upload]

old dudes rock!

 

[roninsina]

Too kind, Upload. Anyone who has found themselves here rocks. Thanks.