Resurrecting an old thread, looking to share my personal experience at the moment, and possibly get some feedback.
Background: Maintenance Suboxone user of 9 months, 4mgs daily after years of abuse with a focus on IV heroin.
Over the past two weeks I've switched over (back) to short-acting opiates (oxycodone, kratom, U44700.) Backwards, I know - but this is a measure to purge the bupenorphine and its absurdly long half-life from my system. This is leading up to an ibogaine flood planned for next weekend. Perhaps call it a freelapse.* During this time I've made three valiant attempts to break through with a DMT flash and try to view my motivations and intent to come off the safety net of Suboxone maintenance, and go on to live a fulfilling life free from narcotics abuse. It seemed like the most perfect time for a DMT coup d'oeil if there ever was one. I never had trouble breaking through with DMT whilst taking Suboxone - however, now that I'm actually experiencing the euphoric effects of the SAO's, I'm cockblocked from making a worthwhile DMT connection.
Each attempt was for sure a solid dosing - working up from 35 to 60 mgs - however I stay inside the tunnel. I get the strong vibration in the top of my head but it never pierces me through. I'm experienced with the molecule, and typically have been able to direct myself to breakthrough states with as little as 20mgs with decent consistency. I should have no trouble with 60 mgs via GVG, and should confidently be able to complete unravel into hyperspace.
No such luck.
Can someone with their head dialed into pharmacological / neurological firings and receptor battles take a shot at why this may be the case - I'm open to a few possibilities but primarily assume that I can't get up to the (gamma?) frequencies of the DMT headspace, like my oscillator stays percussive and never becomes a tone....
One phenomenon which I feel warrants recommending is that during the downgrade to kratom (which, after sustained Suboxone maintenance - doesn't quite cut the mustard and still puts the user through some withdrawals,) is that in the wake of the DMT afterglow, and until I was able to sleep (unthinkable earlier that evening,) I was completely free of withdrawal symptoms - quite comfortable in fact. There is an old expression, "DMT doesn't give you what you want, DMT gives you what you need." I felt this very zen-buddhist presence and a writhing massage which immediately eroded any withdrawal symptoms. They came back like a vengeance 3 hours after falling asleep mind you - but that was 3 hours I might not have otherwise had.
Has anyone else had similar experiences - maybe not with opiate abuse, but even recreational or prescribed use alongside DMT? Contradictory experiences? I'd like to receive some feedback, only because I'm not doing this with a therapist or at a facility, and feel like the introduction of DMT to the process is probably somewhat unique (I know 5-MeO-DMT is being used as a tool for the treatment of opiates as well. I have some of that as well, but it simply doesn't feel appropriate to move onto that when I'm noticing this uncharacteristic behavior with its brother, NN.)
*Obligatory disclaimer re: how opiates can be hell. There's nothing recreational concerning my opiate intake at present, strictly maintenance. I'm being quite honest with the community here - I'm definitely in the red zone for risky substance behavior here, and will save you the long diatribe concerning the havoc opiates can bring - I typed it, but felt it unnecessary for this thread...feel free to ask questions if you have them, I'm happy to answer questions, especially if anyone else is out there thinking about kicking.)
