Some advise for amateur

[ckld]

An hour before I decided to have my third trip. I used a new machine made out of a glass bottle with the bottom cut of and a copper plate on the bottom replaced the glass, wormed it up n smoked around 20mg of clean spice. Nothing much happened except some general tripping. Tried some blue lotus changa I made but still the same. After that took a pipe I made (the key) and placed around 90mg of blue lotus changa inside and smoked just a single shot (couldn't any more). Next I remember my self saying "what the f..k" and layed down. Didn't have the visual reality I had the two times before but I was blown off in an other dimension, a colored dome of cut glass with pointy edges and a feeling of other beings preparating my voyage. By the time I felt leaving my physical body a thought came to my mind. My family, my wife and daughter who at that time where visiting a friends house. I remember a terrible dilemma that I must abjure my family to go on with the voyage, I would never ever let go to that to continue.
I found out that DMT is a very interesting molecule that I love and want once in a while in my life but tonight I wonder if this dilemma will be set in every trip I go. I know there is nothing to fear about losing my self or my family and I want to let go. What must I do? I did meditate before tripping although didn't feel having the time I needed for the trip. Was that it? Will I ever be able to take some lsd ? I mean 8 hours of dilemma will make me insane and I feel I must get tied up for an experience as that.
My experience till now was only on canabbis which I feel finished with (after 20 year of tripping), some truffles and yopo which seems to have more similarities with spice than I expected.
Thanks again all nexians.

 

[obliguhl]

Preparing yourself beforehand can go a long way. I always say to myself "I accept everything". Even if the experience starts to turn very wild i keep on to that "You wanted it...all of it" ...this helps me to let go of a lot of fear, because i can remind myselöf that it was my consciouss choice to embark on that voyage. Also, one day you will have to let your family go. It's not that you can stop the inevitable.

 

[Electric Kool-Aid]

I have kind of the same thing. But my fear is being caught. So much that I find it hard to ever do more than about 5mg at a time, maybe 10mg at the very most. I just fear my family will find out. So I wait until I am alone somewhere so I can let go and not worry about talking, screaming, getting up confused or breaking something by accident. This all can happen and is needed without loved ones who will not understand. I understand spice will be here for me to travel. And so I wait until the time is right.