You are your own god

[Hugin]

This was my second DMT experience, I made sure it would be a full breakthrough. a high dose, perfectly smoked.

As soon as I cleared the pipe and leaned back, reality itself started melting down. the walls and glass panels of my balcony dripping down like a fresh oil painting washed away by water. I closed my eyes and immediately felt my body melting into the ground. I thought, oh shit, I smoked too much.

With violence I was met by six massive disk-like objects appeared above me, metallic, smooth-cut, like enormous circular saw blades, all spinning at lightning speed, each one rotating in the opposite direction from the others. Colors I’d never seen before spewed out from them like sparks from a welding torch cutting through metal.

The whole formation swayed back and forth, closing in on me, pulling back, closing in again, like it was going to tear me apart. The sound it made was paralysing, the pressure inside my head unbearable. I even opened my eyes, thinking it would go away or just to cope but my vision was just grainy static. The spinning object of torture was still there closing in on me again swaying back and forth there was no escape.

For a moment, I questioned myself Is this a bad trip? I’ve never experienced a bad trip. in my mind there’s no such thing as a bad trip. Yesterday, I’d met beautiful wormhole gatekeepers who told me to smoke more to experience hyperspace and multi-dimensional paradise and this definitely wasn’t what they had promised.

then I thought what ever I’m experiencing I’m just going to embrace it and started to be able to focus in on the disks with integrity. not being afraid at all just take in whatever I’m experiencing and cope with the pressure. And just observe what I was seeing because at the same time it was threatening it was in awe beautiful. I then started asking is this really dmt is this all to it with an arrogant voice I was getting mad at it, this had gone on for minutes.

Suddenly, the whole scene erupted. as if a sheet of paper was being violently torn in half right down the middle. From that violent split, beams of light emerged. beings that felt like group of gods. made of pure energy, layered with vibrant auras.

They grabbed me by the throat. Telepathically, intensely, they said
“Who do you think you are? We own you. We own this world. Don’t you ever dare to question our existence.”

Their presence was overwhelming.
I replied “Am I really a bad person? Is this really what I deserve?”
(I try to live my life as honestly, morally, and gratefully as I can. I don’t walk around with heavy guilt, if I had done unforgivable things, this would be the last place I’d want to end up.)

They responded “You are your own god. We are a part of you, and you are a part of us. You have all the answers within.”

Then They released me. I found myself drifting through a sea of complex, morphing geometries. forms colliding, blending, endlessly transforming. I wasn’t just observing it I was apart of it. I was inside the geometry, floating through it. Then I came across a massive holographic spiral that seemed vertically endless, vibrant, twisted in shape with a vibrant colour

Then Slowly, it all began to fade. I felt present in my body again. lying still, overwhelmed with gratitude and awe I stayed with my eyes closed for a while, vibrating with a strong presence from the universe, feeling deeply humble and grateful. This experience taught me that fear and arrogance are barriers in hyperspace, just as they are in life.

The light beings, even though they came in force, were not there to punish me but to humble me, they were reflecting my own state back to me. They showed me that divinity is not separate from us. We have all the answers within.

Now later analysing the experience As an veteran psychonaut with countless experiences under my belt I know that the disk shaped object pushing my limits was a gatekeepers test as I have countered them as entities and in many different shapes and forms having to pass they’re psychological test to be worthy of gaining access to higher dimension and be let in. intense psyche trials are the doorway to profound realizations.

There’s not always gatekeepers but I have had to deal with a lot of them. I will post more in depth analysis of my experiences in the future but leave this one on this note

I would also like to hear any interpretation or insight from another perspective is always appreciated as is any feedback.

 

[Tripolation]

Man... what a awesome experience! I very much enjoyed reading that. I have to say that I am impressed at your recall, descriptions, skill and integration. It can be difficult to work around fear and push through the gates. You were able to embrace the experience and transformed it, and in doing so you received some valuable insights from higher aspects of yourself. I think your interpretation is on point and I would not add to it or take away from it. It is perfect as it is.

I am consistently blown away by how similar experiences are from psychonaut to psychonaut. I received the same kind of information of 'You are your own god and all the information is within.'. And it wasn't just like it was stated to me but more like it given to me in a way that I some how knew it to be true, that gut feeling, the full experience of "AHA!".

Thank you very much for sharing your experience. I am a connoisseur of experience reports. I find each experience report from hyperspace to be fascinating, entertaining and more often than not very insightful. It absolutely amazes me even after years of reading reports, it never gets old for me.

Postcards from hyperspace.

 

[premeditated]

This was my second DMT experience, I made sure it would be a full breakthrough. a high dose, perfectly smoked.

As soon as I cleared the pipe and leaned back, reality itself started melting down. the walls and glass panels of my balcony dripping down like a fresh oil painting washed away by water. I closed my eyes and immediately felt my body melting into the ground. I thought, oh shit, I smoked too much.

With violence I was met by six massive disk-like objects appeared above me, metallic, smooth-cut, like enormous circular saw blades, all spinning at lightning speed, each one rotating in the opposite direction from the others. Colors I’d never seen before spewed out from them like sparks from a welding torch cutting through metal.

The whole formation swayed back and forth, closing in on me, pulling back, closing in again, like it was going to tear me apart. The sound it made was paralysing, the pressure inside my head unbearable. I even opened my eyes, thinking it would go away or just to cope but my vision was just grainy static. The spinning object of torture was still there closing in on me again swaying back and forth there was no escape.

For a moment, I questioned myself Is this a bad trip? I’ve never experienced a bad trip. in my mind there’s no such thing as a bad trip. Yesterday, I’d met beautiful wormhole gatekeepers who told me to smoke more to experience hyperspace and multi-dimensional paradise and this definitely wasn’t what they had promised.

then I thought what ever I’m experiencing I’m just going to embrace it and started to be able to focus in on the disks with integrity. not being afraid at all just take in whatever I’m experiencing and cope with the pressure. And just observe what I was seeing because at the same time it was threatening it was in awe beautiful. I then started asking is this really dmt is this all to it with an arrogant voice I was getting mad at it, this had gone on for minutes.

Suddenly, the whole scene erupted. as if a sheet of paper was being violently torn in half right down the middle. From that violent split, beams of light emerged. beings that felt like group of gods. made of pure energy, layered with vibrant auras.

They grabbed me by the throat. Telepathically, intensely, they said
“Who do you think you are? We own you. We own this world. Don’t you ever dare to question our existence.”

Their presence was overwhelming.
I replied “Am I really a bad person? Is this really what I deserve?”
(I try to live my life as honestly, morally, and gratefully as I can. I don’t walk around with heavy guilt, if I had done unforgivable things, this would be the last place I’d want to end up.)

They responded “You are your own god. We are a part of you, and you are a part of us. You have all the answers within.”

Then They released me. I found myself drifting through a sea of complex, morphing geometries. forms colliding, blending, endlessly transforming. I wasn’t just observing it I was apart of it. I was inside the geometry, floating through it. Then I came across a massive holographic spiral that seemed vertically endless, vibrant, twisted in shape with a vibrant colour

Then Slowly, it all began to fade. I felt present in my body again. lying still, overwhelmed with gratitude and awe I stayed with my eyes closed for a while, vibrating with a strong presence from the universe, feeling deeply humble and grateful. This experience taught me that fear and arrogance are barriers in hyperspace, just as they are in life.

The light beings, even though they came in force, were not there to punish me but to humble me, they were reflecting my own state back to me. They showed me that divinity is not separate from us. We have all the answers within.

Now later analysing the experience As an veteran psychonaut with countless experiences under my belt I know that the disk shaped object pushing my limits was a gatekeepers test as I have countered them as entities and in many different shapes and forms having to pass they’re psychological test to be worthy of gaining access to higher dimension and be let in. intense psyche trials are the doorway to profound realizations.

There’s not always gatekeepers but I have had to deal with a lot of them. I will post more in depth analysis of my experiences in the future but leave this one on this note for now and start on my next one this is only the beginning of my traveling archive.

I would also like to hear any interpretation or insight from another perspective is always appreciated as is any feedback.

That was badass bro . Just curious you said 2nd dmt experience but veteran psychonaut. What is your background? I'm probably like 10 low doses and can barely remember anything profound. Just curious thinking maybe after so many experiences I can start to bring more detail back.

 

[Hugin]

Man... what a awesome experience! I very much enjoyed reading that. I have to say that I am impressed at your recall, descriptions, skill and integration. It can be difficult to work around fear and push through the gates. You were able to embrace the experience and transformed it, and in doing so you received some valuable insights from higher aspects of yourself. I think your interpretation is on point and I would not add to it or take away from it. It is perfect as it is.

I am consistently blown away by how similar experiences are from psychonaut to psychonaut. I received the same kind of information of 'You are your own god and all the information is within.'. And it wasn't just like it was stated to me but more like it given to me in a way that I some how knew it to be true, that gut feeling, the full experience of "AHA!".

Thank you very much for sharing your experience. I am a connoisseur of experience reports. I find each experience report from hyperspace to be fascinating, entertaining and more often than not very insightful. It absolutely amazes me even after years of reading reports, it never gets old for me.

Postcards from hyperspace.

Brother, from the bottom of my heart thank you! I very much appreciate your mindfulness.

I’m impressed with myself really with how vividly I can recall most if not all of my travels, after a few dozens I started writing down key notes of my experiences to not loose any needles in the haystack, and reading the notes I can vividly remember the experience in details like it happened yesterday. As i do with my most profound ones without my notes.

Im used to having to describe my experiences to people that have no relationship with the molecule, as you know is sometimes nearly impossible. And most of the time better left undone. so that’s where that comes from

I will take my time to mindfully write all my reports down for the nexus archive as I did this one. And your reply to this report reflects as inspiration in me to do so to the best of my ability. Really thank you for that.

It’s fascinates me also how we experience similar and essentially the same experiences in different ways and encounter the same entities, gods and goddesses.

it’s truly mind blowing. It’s a reason why I take my writing seriously and see our nexus archive as valuable spiritual-scientific research.

In my opinion interpretation of the experience is really important to be able to fully understand your experience and be able to integrate that valuable insight in your life.

The same truth is represented to us in so many different ways and forms.
I love how you resonate with the same truth as I experienced there. The aha! Moment all psychonauts can relate to.
I love that gut feeling, truth resonating within you. It flares up your intuition.

My next report should not disappoint your taste, my favourite connoisseur!

Words cannot describe how much I appreciate you brother.

 

[fink]

I have the same message. Everyone is their own god. And more importantly, everyone has their own death

 

[premeditated]

Everybody is our own God while powering or being connected to this mysterious GREAT CONSCIOUSNESS. When I think about it deeply it makes me feel weird AF. We are all connected one consciousness..that's crazy. Who cares what differences we have..skin color, race, gender...we are sharing this human experience together at this time in a timeless universe....on earth that is shaped like a half pipe . Going crazy speeds in the cosmos.

 

[fink]

Everybody is our own God while powering or being connected to this mysterious GREAT CONSCIOUSNESS. When I think about it deeply it makes me feel weird AF. We are all connected one consciousness..that's crazy. Who cares what differences we have..skin color, race, gender...we are sharing this human experience together at this time in a timeless universe....on earth that is shaped like a half pipe . Going crazy speeds in the cosmos.

I relate to that weird feeling strongly. At the times when I've been everything and everyone, I actual find it terrifying and comforting at the same time

 

[Pandora]

hugin

Great trip report. As mentioned you have wonderful recall and great ability to put the ineffable into words. Your self analysis seems profoundly insightful. Way to take the material in and learn and grow from it, even though it was so darned intense you felt you had done too much. I think a lot of us have been there at least a couple times.

 

[Hugin]

hugin

Great trip report. As mentioned you have wonderful recall and great ability to put the ineffable into words. Your self analysis seems profoundly insightful. Way to take the material in and learn and grow from it, even though it was so darned intense you felt you had done too much. I think a lot of us have been there at least a couple times.

Thank you Pandora, I really appreciate you.

Yes at least a couple times!

 

[Hugin]

That was badass bro . Just curious you said 2nd dmt experience but veteran psychonaut. What is your background? I'm probably like 10 low doses and can barely remember anything profound. Just curious thinking maybe after so many experiences I can start to bring more detail back.

Thanks bro! My background is years of experiences and extracting my own. Learned everything from the nexus and it’s time for me to give back.

Even on low doses I have had profound experiences. Maybe it’s to low doses for you or the quality of the dmt you are using. It’s hard to pinpoint with no info exactly, this molecule works so differently between people. Some have a hard time getting a breakthrough, some just fall asleep and don’t remember anything. Some just don’t really grasp the experience and analyse it fully. It’s hard to say for you personally without more info.

When you are traveling for the first dozen times it can be super intense and overwhelming it can be hard for some to grasp it fully.
With time you will be super aware and conscious while travelling. Atleast for me personally and I can recall my experiences from memory really well.
Your experience depends on the dmt, the quality. the way you smoke it is important.

I recommend after every experience to lay back for a while and analyse your journey in details. If your memory is bad then immediately write it down or at least key notes to remember the whole experience through.

Also if you don’t remember anything profound maybe you are not experiencing anything profound. What do you remember ?

Why the low doses though, why don’t you just go for a breakthrough?

One love

 

[Hugin]

I have the same message. Everyone is their own god. And more importantly, everyone has their own death

You inspired me to next write up and share my death experience. I just posted it if you are interested.

Also love your tattoo brother, we very much share the same interest in mythology.

 

[s2cndchance]

I definitely got the "you are your own god" part early on but it seems to differ that I ended up on a path of "you do not need keepers or guides of any kind and any attempt to do so should be interpreted as an attempt to restrain you" whereas I have found very few people (only one in fact) that share this perspective.

Interestingly, you did experience them getting violent with you, but interpret it as humbling. As if you, if you are your own god, aren't at least their equal and would need any humbling.

Afaik gods like to find ever new and creative ways to oppress other gods

 

[fink]

You inspired me to next write up and share my death experience. I just posted it if you are interested.

Also love your tattoo brother, we very much share the same interest in mythology.

Only just saw this, could you point me to that report please?

 

[Hugin]

Only just saw this, could you point me to that report please?

no stress brother, You already commented on the thread so you have read it.
Appreciate you.

Death

Usually I travel alone but this time my brother was with me. It was his second time, his first travel he didn’t get a breakthrough properly. I started by helping him get on his way first with my own bowl lined up. As I broke through, I emerged into a dimension filled with this massive, vibrant...

forum.dmt-nexus.me

 

[Hugin]

I definitely got the "you are your own god" part early on but it seems to differ that I ended up on a path of "you do not need keepers or guides of any kind and any attempt to do so should be interpreted as an attempt to restrain you" whereas I have found very few people (only one in fact) that share this perspective.

Interestingly, you did experience them getting violent with you, but interpret it as humbling. As if you, if you are your own god, aren't at least their equal and would need any humbling.

Afaik gods like to find ever new and creative ways to oppress other gods

I share your core stance on sovereignty and the same key perspective. But we differ a lot. Any entity or encounter that asks for trust, offers guidance, or seeks acceptance is trying to bind you and i reject that. First to clarify, my report was a raw experience from my first breakthrough and impact on me at that time. Not a philosophical defence, that would overcast shadow on the experience report. I don’t like to rant too much off in my report itself but i appreciate and welcome any discussion.

Let’s clarify i never stated that these entities were gods. I describe them as light beings pure energy and i wrote “beings that felt like group of gods“ because that is what it felt like at that time and is true to my expression at the time of the experience and still is.

Although I felt overpowered a throat grip sensation in that moment, it was what it felt like. I describe a violent manner as it was. Intent was not hostile. There was no demand, no lie, I was not deceived. Infect they equipped me with my armour to navigate safely in hyperspace. The very important message from them “you are your own god” is evident of the intent and released me immediately.

Tricksters or any beings mischievous or malicious will deceive, lie, demand consent, ask for confirmation of trust and keep you under restraint. Non coercive entities or encounters don’t ask, don’t bind. There’s mutual respect, love, trust and leave as easily as they arrive. I embrace only non binding connections that reinforce sovereignty and never let my guard down.

You found only me with this perspective?
I feel like you are twisting things up a bit and take things out of context.

We don’t interpret the meaning of the message the same way and that’s fine.
Everyone walks it’s own path.
Interestingly somehow we share the same principle. The difference is that I’ve sharpened it to a scalpel where you wield it as a sword.
Self Sovereignty is not the isolation of all contact, it is the refusal of all binding. You have traded clarity for safety that leads you to limitations and complete isolation.

and I have never gained anything from surrendering to it except feeling bad. No information, nothing useful coming back, no fun while I'm there. Deliberately refusing to surrender to the nonsense helps me get what I want from it a lot. Especially dealing with some of the annoying entities.

Based on your statements you prefer zero contact while I draw a thin line that I do not let be crossed by malicious intent.
I can admit i have gotten a bit reckless sometimes, but never let my guard down.

It doesn’t surprise me at all that with negative mind set and refusal you experience feeling bad, no information or nothing useful coming back to you. You say deliberately refusing to surrender helps you get out of it what you want. What is it exactly you want out of it ?
How can you expect anything when you give nothing?
It’s important to surrender to the experience, source, your own higher self.
It’s just as important to trust, at the same time be aware as I’ve explained. It is very rare to encounter malicious intent.
No negativity or negative emotions intended.
I only feel need to be honest with you.
And pick your mind a little.
Have you had bad experiences? where trust was violated ?

Other than that I appreciate your response.
I hope I clarified any misunderstanding.

 

[s2cndchance]

What is it exactly you want out of it ?
How can you expect anything when you give nothing?
It’s important to surrender to the experience, source, your own higher self

1. Context.
2. I can only say I give effort to do things, the same way I seem to in sober life.
3. I surrender to my own higher self. I do not believe dmt has anything to do with the experience except enabling it by turning off aspects of the body. Thus I interpret just about everything in that experience as separate from me as much as so sober life. Feeling like I'm being taking on a trip or journey without the continuing notion that I chose to do whatever it is I'm doing (during said trip) by myself for myself, is an immediate no no. But of course I have to do the breakthrough and such, which is uncomfortable but necessary.

As far as your message/story, you obviously have the full extent and context of what happened so I defer to you, for that...

Self Sovereignty is not the isolation of all contact, it is the refusal of all binding. You have traded clarity for safety that leads you to limitations and complete isolation.

It's all of course a matter of context, the situation we live in. I agree that hesitation, paranoia and security are, I think, limiting and hindering wherever they are exceeded. Wasted effort. Behaving like you found yourself on a minefield is very inefficient.
Unless, of course, you really are on a minefield.

So where are you? Where are the beings of Earth? Where is Earth in the larger scheme of things?

Perhaps I'm lucky to have experienced some astoundingly paranormal stuff, which leads me to investigate more stuff like dreams, DMT, and other methods. Trying to figure out what's going on. I could easily understand why someone without such experiences would disregard it, but I was not expecting to find out most people that *did* have all these experiences to believe the things they did or continue their bodily life as normal.

To answer the last question, I have not had explicit violations of trust. Only eventual realization of deceptions. What happened was in my initial investigations I would be taken on journeys, shown "astounding" insights, feel all sorts of good feelings. And what would I end up with? Nothing. No useful answers were actually given when the dust settled. Nothing I could use in any practical way that wasn't "borrowed" from someone else, with me only able to use it at their discretion. The most I ever got would only be useful to, contrary to my desires, pursue my bodily life as if I never found this stuff.

It was not until I started saying "no" to basically everything that approached me, believing that they did not have my best interest in mind, or at best were intent on giving me a poor exchange of services on my part that things took a turn for the better. I started finding answers and a consistent narrative, a context I could work with.

Most of all though, as to why I have a darker view of things, is because in many of my experiences after this turning point, I do very dark things. These are almost always like dreams when you have no lucidity, for when I am lucid I am only ever observing and trying to work things out. But in the regular trip, the person I seem to become, who apparently knows how to navigate everything better than my bodily persona, I blast people with pleasure to make them like me. I give them love, or attention, knowing they crave it like addicted children. They are so mentally addled and screwed from their environment it is a simple thing to get them to *want* to do what I *want* them to do. They do it willingly. Usually I'm just enabling those that already want to do something, and of course they bite, not knowing that what they wanted was profoundly foolish, because they don't have any context to put their actions in. I set mind boggling traps. I change people's memories. I change my appeance and let them *assume* that I am what I appear to be without having to say a word.

These have been my experiences. If it's all inside my head, then I'm just battling myself a lot lol. But I don't think it is for several other reasons...

I remember being on the receiving end of innocent but insidious gestures, and then the giving end of them too. Some of it is by force, but most of it is truly insidious stuff centered on good feelings, peace and tranquility, love and light bologna, with the keystone being a total lack of context.

So, yes, I have a very pessimisstic outlook on things, but all I ever wanted to do was figure out what exactly is "going on." And although the narrative I have is not fun for me to think about, no explicit malintent was forced on me minus a few "brawls" after I refused to work with supposed "friends" and a digusting implant scene... Plenty of horrible "galaxy" context though, surrounding almost everything beings are involved in, on, or about human bodies.

Edit: typos