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Alexicus

Rising Star
I have been on pretty much all the main, popular drug sites. In the past I've gone here to look up extraction methods/drug FAQs, but I never really read the forums until now. And after reading them... well let's say I'm never wasting my time posting at other sites again.

From what I ascertained in the posts and threads from the other sites, the people on there are just looking to get high and are drug users(e.g. addicts), and not people just use drugs and like to explore there consciousness. Even the psychedelic boards on other sites are weak, most just talking about first times, and general novice advice.

You guys are on my level, and I love it! I don't know how to eloquently put this without coming off like I'm jerking off my ego, so instead of throwing numbers and achievements around I'll just say that I'm pretty intelligent and wise for a sack of conscious, organic meat on a small moot of dust in the universe.

I have so many ideas and theories about life that I'd love to bounce off of with like minded individuals.
 
Welcome aboard Alexicus! :)

Indeed the Nexus does have some aspects to its tone and demeanour that are not found on other drug-related sites, and, like you, I think this is part of what makes this place rather special.I reckon the Travelers firm but appropriate grip on things is largely why this is the case.Im pretty sure some members here also frequent the other sites but the difference is more one of attitude that keeps the Nexus as it is.

So, whats your experience with the psychedelics thus far?

Be well and once more, welcome. :d
 
Wlcome to Nexus Alexicus. You are right about the "magic" of this site :)

I also joined because this site is more then just talking about drugs and how to get high. Once you become part of this community many thing in your life may change to good ;)

I am also interested in your experience with psychedelics. Have you tried spirit molecule yet ?

all the best to you
 
I'm a psychonaut and so I love to explore my consciousness, and am fascinated by all the different altered states of consciousness one can have. I have gone as far as one can go down the rabbit hole. I have had breakthrough experiences of DMT, and the biggest poly drug combo I tried was 2 hits LSD, 5g shrooms, .2g MDMA.

Agreed tele. With other psychedelics I'm able to fairly accurately translate the trip and explain it in modern day language terms, and not just what I learned or got out of the trip, but I mean explain almost all the effects the drug had on me. But with DMT... it's much more difficult. I can barely begin to tell you the experience, only what I got out of it, and trying to describe the visuals and seeing entities is near impossible.

E.g. One of the best breakthrough doses of DMT I had 3 entities contact me. They were in an archway/hallway with pillars of light shining through the huge columns in this room and they were walking towards me. No words were said directly to me that I could hear, but that day I felt transcended as a human. I could just feel every last bit of egotistical want or desire float away from me. That included my drug use, because I would do anything I could grab my hands on minus opiates and hard drugs.

Now I stick to mary, molly, and lucy as these girls have treated me right. In the future I can see myself trying DMT again (I've done 2-3 grams worth), but right now it's just not the kind of experience I'm looking for.

Psychedelics I've done from most to least:
- LSD
- DMT
- Shrooms
- 2c-b
- Mescaline (self made)
 
Welcome Alexicus. You will probably feel the call, next time you're ready to work with spice. Besides entheogens, what other methods have you used to explore conciousness? Meditation, binaural beats, sensory deprivation etc?

You've found the right place, nice to have you aboard. I'll look forward to reading more from you, hearing your input and what you have to share.

Peace

Macre
 
Macre, I've tried every type of different drug out there (for science). Psychedelics, weed, alcohol, tobacco, mdma/stimulants, dissociatives, deliriants, opiates, benzos and other miscellaneous drug types + RCs. Oh and jenkem, can't forget about huffin' jenk all day.

I have tried sensory deprivation, meditation, and listened those music beats designed to illicit some sort of change in your cognitive awareness/consciousness. I have done them both sober and tripping.

For instance, my last lsd trip I did mainly an introspective trip and primarily laid on a bed with my eyes closed. I have tripped plenty of times, but this one was just different, and mainly the reason that caused me to create this account. All my other trips were focused on fixing me because I had unresolved issues with my ego, but this trip was different since I basically solved all the problems of my own ego.

I felt like I have gained this incredible insight to everything. Not that I've become more intelligent, just much more wise. Everything makes sense to me now, I feel like I solved so many problems that people still haven't grasped. I see the underlying motives for every action a person does now, I just feel like I've become a super human at analyzing things for what they're truly worth.

An example would be me going to Cracker Barrel the day after this trip. They have this game on every table you can play that is shaped like a triangle with holes in it, and there's a peg in every hole but one. The goal is to play it like checkers and jump the pegs and get down to 1 peg left.

When I played that game before I could sometimes get it down to one. After that trip though, I realized how to beat that game. I'll skip the trivial details, but I was able to analyze the game, and I systemically set up a way to beat it every time, with out fail.
 
Also, I love the good vibes from here. Everyone is conscious of their ego and they try to send out only positive vibes. :d
 
Welcome to the Nexus!

I think a lot of us can relate to things you've said.

If I may offer a constructive criticism, though, I couldnt help noticing you've mentioned things like:

"I have gone as far as one can go down the rabbit hole.",

"I basically solved all the problems of my own ego. "

"I see the underlying motives for every action a person does now, "


Regarding the first one, I dont think there's an end to the rabbit hole. If you think you've reached the end, you're bound for a big surprise soon enough (DMT/ayahuasca tends to do that hyperspacial 'slap' often, I know ive certainly experienced it :D ). This is certainly not to discount your experience, I bet you have gone very deep, and that this all took a lot of effort, a lot of self-sacrifice and development, but I just suggest being careful with thinking the end has been reached, because at least IME, this is impossible if you're a human being and still alive :D

As for the second, I dont think any of us ever completely solved all the problems of our ego. I say this because I think the ego is a dynamic module that we have to deal with constantly, it's always changing and adapting to the situation, and it has the tendency to try to 'outgrow' itself. I feel the ego is like our nails, that keeps growing and growing, and we have to regularly trim it. It does have its function, but it will keep growing unsustainably, and once its past a certain size it starts hurting us, and others, and it also becomes more fragile, so we'll need to keep trimming it ocasionally till we die.


So I totally can understand if you feel like youve took some very big steps in your own self-development and search for awareness, but I think you should try to keep your eyes open because the search to keep the ego in balance and be more aware and so on, is a path that lasts our whole lives. Each step you make, while it may solve problems of the past, also opens up to new responsibilities and new difficult choices of a different level.

And as for the third quote, I also agree and have experienced this too, and I do think me (and a lot of people here) become very analytical when looking at others and interacting, its also important to realize that our judgement about others may be lacking (so there may be other motives in their actions we dont see, different contextual/background variables we are missing), or we might be straight out wrong. So its important to let that element of doubt, of skepticism about our own ideas and certainties.

Are you not interested in oral dmt/ayahuasca? You didnt mention that in your posts.

Be well!
 
endlessness said:
I don't think there's an end to the rabbit hole.
Click to expand...

Indeed. You say you've done 2-3 grams worth of DMT? Awesome, but you've only just begun to see how deep the rabbit hole goes. I myself am 30+ grams into DMT and, believe me, I'm just a pup in this world, barely out of the womb, still blind, suckling at the teat, and struggling to shed the remnants of the Mother's cosmic placenta. I know nothing except that there is something very big out there that I've been privileged to glimpse from time to time.

Not to discount all you've done to explore consciousness, mind you. We are all pups. And like enddy said, have you thought about aya, pharma, and whatnot? Talk about the rabbit hole getting deeeeeeeeper and deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeper.

Welcome, have fun.
 
I know exactly what you mean about this forum. I came here just recently lurking for info on how to slap the portions of my hyperspace that have yet to be slapped and decided to sign up and be an active member of a forum for my first time since I've been online, which has been what maybe 16 years now.

Endlessness, my recent sponsor here, makes some good points. It seems to me that in order to have gone as far down the rabbit hole as possible one would have to have completely eliminated fear and pride from themselves, so that no matter what was encountered one would experience only peaceful, loving equanimity. This would require one to have completely solved all the problems of ego. I estimate from my experience this is possible if one has completely faced all negativity in themselves and transcended it by training themselves to abide in perfect, fearless, loving awareness. In this state of transcendent fearless love responsibilities would be shouldered with ease and choices along with their outcomes would lose all their risk and fearsomeness. But this requires one to not only have realized who they truly are, the non-dual Self transcendent to and encompassing form, but to abide perfectly as that Self while facing all their fearful and prideful vibrations. It seems this can be done by facing in perfect loving awareness one's bad vibrations as they manifest as the content of one's life, be it in "physical" events or in a bad trip. Completing this path of awareness is IME very, very rare, it requires one to love everything equally just as it is with zero fear.

Have you achieved this? I've had trouble with it and am still working on it. As to being able to see another's underlying motives, I have reached a point of purification where I can begin to see this happening in myself. The more of my negativity I have transcended the more psychic I have slowly become, sometimes I can hear people's thoughts before they speak them or know their mind on a certain subject without having them tell me(confirmed in later conversations) or predict the outcomes of future events(only once so far with perfect clarity). This ability rests on becoming one with all of infinity and in me is still very unclear and often inaccurate in areas where I still have fear or pride. It is a distraction for me at this point more than anything, but I do know it to be possible.

I came here looking for aya suppliers but found a community where an unusual number are actively facing themselves. I love it, I can actually talk about this stuff without completely violating the context and social norms of the community. I'm far from ready to go around like jesus telling people to leave society and follow me. It's nice to be able to talk freely even though I fear going out in society at large and directly confronting the others belief systems. :oops: Here I can do it anonymously and while maybe still helping someone. :p
 
yogi said:
It's nice to be able to talk freely even though I fear going out in society at large and directly confronting the others belief systems.
Click to expand...

Hmmm, with zero fear I'd probably go further than confronting others' belief systems... That would be just a reinforcement of the game - possibly on another level, but still.

Without fear, I could become a perfect mirror. I wouldn't partake any more in the usual action-reaction games, and this "remaining silent" alone would be powerful enough to catalyze awakening in others. People just threw their usual stuff at me, but I wouldn't play my expected part - wouldn't react with the usual mechanistic patterns -, my freedom would allow me to let it all in, and somehow - through the power of love perhaps - transform it and project it back as enlightenment, understanding.

Anyone who gets to this level can expect attacks of an unimaginable magnitude: the universe would sense that there is a possibility to get rid of the baggage and throw extreme amounts of shit onto this person, to maximally utilize his/her gift in the transformation/healing of reality.

But for the truly enlightened person this is not a burden any more: after all, if you have a machine which can transform shit to gold, then shit becomes a treasure.
 
"I see the underlying motives for every action a person does now, "
Yes, I can relate to this strongly. My mother has always said I was an observant person since I was a child. After DMT I had an extremely deep insight flowing through the thoughts of other people and their actions in life. You notice things you would not otherwise notice ever, it changes your personality to eradicate the ego and negativity. It is wonderful and should be respected as such.

"After that trip though, I realized how to beat that game. I'll skip the trivial details, but I was able to analyze the game, and I systemically set up a way to beat it every time, with out fail."
I'm glad you experienced the positive cognitive effects of DMT usage Alexicus. I know I experienced crazy-good hand-eye coordination when I thought about what I was doing intently enough and the same for other mental processes. I definitely like the hunger for knowledge it provides too, its very enlightening.
 
endlessness said:
Regarding the first one, I dont think there's an end to the rabbit hole. If you think you've reached the end, you're bound for a big surprise soon enough (DMT/ayahuasca tends to do that hyperspacial 'slap' often, I know ive certainly experienced it :D ). This is certainly not to discount your experience, I bet you have gone very deep, and that this all took a lot of effort, a lot of self-sacrifice and development, but I just suggest being careful with thinking the end has been reached, because at least IME, this is impossible if you're a human being and still alive :D
Click to expand...

I try my hardest to accurately convey my thoughts so that there is no confusion in the message I am trying to relay to you, but I see I have failed here. I realize there is no end to the rabbit hole, what I meant was that my jediflip was as far as I want to go down the rabbit hole. I've seen just how far you can take it, and for now that's good enough for me.

endlessness said:
As for the second, I dont think any of us ever completely solved all the problems of our ego. I say this because I think the ego is a dynamic module that we have to deal with constantly, it's always changing and adapting to the situation, and it has the tendency to try to 'outgrow' itself. I feel the ego is like our nails, that keeps growing and growing, and we have to regularly trim it. It does have its function, but it will keep growing unsustainably, and once its past a certain size it starts hurting us, and others, and it also becomes more fragile, so we'll need to keep trimming it ocasionally till we die.

So I totally can understand if you feel like youve took some very big steps in your own self-development and search for awareness, but I think you should try to keep your eyes open because the search to keep the ego in balance and be more aware and so on, is a path that lasts our whole lives. Each step you make, while it may solve problems of the past, also opens up to new responsibilities and new difficult choices of a different level.
Click to expand...

Agreed completely endlessness, your constructive criticism was much appreciated! Keeping my ego in check is why I intend to continue my lsd use, but once in awhile, not as frequently as before. I know I haven't solved all my problems yet at all, however I'm aware of almost all of them and I'm self-actualized. My consciousness is now evolving to that of the highest tier there is, and I want to make a separate thread about this because there's so much I want to talk about on this topic.


endlessness said:
And as for the third quote, I also agree and have experienced this too, and I do think me (and a lot of people here) become very analytical when looking at others and interacting, its also important to realize that our judgement about others may be lacking (so there may be other motives in their actions we dont see, different contextual/background variables we are missing), or we might be straight out wrong. So its important to let that element of doubt, of skepticism about our own ideas and certainties.
Click to expand...

I'm one of the most open minded people I know. A good way to gauge that in an individual is to see how much genres of music they listen to. If that individual has the ability to listen to other types of music, but refuse to, that shows close mindedness. I've noticed that the people who are truly my best friends are as open minded and nice as me.

I try to see other's as an alternate version of me. You are me, and I am you... like the feeling of oneness you get off shrooms/dmt. We both have the same human consciousness, albeit slightly different and seperated by a body and an external environment.


endlessness said:
Are you not interested in oral dmt/ayahuasca? You didnt mention that in your posts.
Click to expand...

Not really, I nearly pulled a Jemi Hendrix and choked to death on my own vomit. Now I'm cautious and try to avoid taking anything that would make me throw up.

vested said:
"After that trip though, I realized how to beat that game. I'll skip the trivial details, but I was able to analyze the game, and I systemically set up a way to beat it every time, with out fail."
I'm glad you experienced the positive cognitive effects of DMT usage Alexicus.
Click to expand...

I think you may have misinterpreted what I wrote. While I have indeed experienced positive cognitive effects from DMT use, the thing you were quoting was from my most recent lsd trip.

vested said:
I definitely like the hunger for knowledge it provides too, its very enlightening.
Click to expand...

The meaning of life is simple. It's whatever you make it. Because I'm pretty conscious of my ego, my main pursuit is happiness and knowledge. Key word being pursue. There is false happiness like shooting up H, and false knowledge like government propaganda.
 
yogi said:
I know exactly what you mean about this forum. I came here just recently lurking for info on how to slap the portions of my hyperspace that have yet to be slapped and decided to sign up and be an active member of a forum for my first time since I've been online, which has been what maybe 16 years now.

Endlessness, my recent sponsor here, makes some good points. It seems to me that in order to have gone as far down the rabbit hole as possible one would have to have completely eliminated fear and pride from themselves, so that no matter what was encountered one would experience only peaceful, loving equanimity. This would require one to have completely solved all the problems of ego. I estimate from my experience this is possible if one has completely faced all negativity in themselves and transcended it by training themselves to abide in perfect, fearless, loving awareness. In this state of transcendent fearless love responsibilities would be shouldered with ease and choices along with their outcomes would lose all their risk and fearsomeness. But this requires one to not only have realized who they truly are, the non-dual Self transcendent to and encompassing form, but to abide perfectly as that Self while facing all their fearful and prideful vibrations. It seems this can be done by facing in perfect loving awareness one's bad vibrations as they manifest as the content of one's life, be it in "physical" events or in a bad trip. Completing this path of awareness is IME very, very rare, it requires one to love everything equally just as it is with zero fear.

Have you achieved this? I've had trouble with it and am still working on it. As to being able to see another's underlying motives, I have reached a point of purification where I can begin to see this happening in myself. The more of my negativity I have transcended the more psychic I have slowly become, sometimes I can hear people's thoughts before they speak them or know their mind on a certain subject without having them tell me(confirmed in later conversations) or predict the outcomes of future events(only once so far with perfect clarity). This ability rests on becoming one with all of infinity and in me is still very unclear and often inaccurate in areas where I still have fear or pride. It is a distraction for me at this point more than anything, but I do know it to be possible.

I came here looking for aya suppliers but found a community where an unusual number are actively facing themselves. I love it, I can actually talk about this stuff without completely violating the context and social norms of the community. I'm far from ready to go around like jesus telling people to leave society and follow me. It's nice to be able to talk freely even though I fear going out in society at large and directly confronting the others belief systems. :oops: Here I can do it anonymously and while maybe still helping someone. :p
Click to expand...

Oh man, that post gave me goosebumps. Yes this is exactly it, I feel I have transcended to a level akin to Jesus or Buddha. I feel like I can change this world and make it better, and I'm making it my life's mission. It first starts off with finding support of like-minded individuals, and then eventually being able to help turn close-minded minds open.
 
cellux said:
People just threw their usual stuff at me, but I wouldn't play my expected part - wouldn't react with the usual mechanistic patterns -, my freedom would allow me to let it all in, and somehow - through the power of love perhaps - transform it and project it back as enlightenment, understanding.
Click to expand...

I know exactly what you mean. I choose willfully not to react like everyone does. It's a conscious, daily effort. A good, small scale example is being in a crowded, but quiet and safe room when a door opens. What happens? The normal reaction is to look at whatever created a change in the external environment, in this case the door. But if I hear the door open, I can assume it's going to be a person opening the door. Who opens it is usually arbitrary, so why bother to waste time to look at a person coming into a room?

cellux said:
Anyone who gets to this level can expect attacks of an unimaginable magnitude: the universe would sense that there is a possibility to get rid of the baggage and throw extreme amounts of shit onto this person, to maximally utilize his/her gift in the transformation/healing of reality.

But for the truly enlightened person this is not a burden any more: after all, if you have a machine which can transform shit to gold, then shit becomes a treasure.
Click to expand...

I have faced adversity that has caused me to be depressed, suicidal, and just done with life. I've leapt over these adversities through introspection and psychedelic use.
 
tetra said:
endlessness said:
I don't think there's an end to the rabbit hole.
Click to expand...

Indeed. You say you've done 2-3 grams worth of DMT? Awesome, but you've only just begun to see how deep the rabbit hole goes. I myself am 30+ grams into DMT and, believe me, I'm just a pup in this world, barely out of the womb, still blind, suckling at the teat, and struggling to shed the remnants of the Mother's cosmic placenta. I know nothing except that there is something very big out there that I've been privileged to glimpse from time to time.

Not to discount all you've done to explore consciousness, mind you. We are all pups. And like enddy said, have you thought about aya, pharma, and whatnot? Talk about the rabbit hole getting deeeeeeeeper and deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeper.

Welcome, have fun.
Click to expand...

My ego was slightly offended by this post. It seems to me you're trying to convey an elitist view point based on the evidence that because you did more quantity means you've ascertained more insights than me. But at the same time I feel like you realized this as well and so you said "we are all pups". However that being said, quantity =/= quality. I've been the person who has tripped on lsd once a week or once twice a week. I gained very little insight because I was focused on getting high as well, and not just the pursuit of knowledge from these trips.

Unless you take the lessons you learned from the trips and apply them to your life, the trips mean nothing but a high and a wasted potential for cognitive advancement. The longer I wait to trip or even getting high for that matter, the more I get out of it and gain from.
 
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