Depression, the long lasting friend making roads of concrete sorrow that never ends. It's important to understand the relationship to the environment and what is systemic in how it shapes our seeing of reality to hijack and reverse engineer the process. Our disconnection from the body has lead to huge misunderstanding of how perception works and what is healthy. As we live in a system that ever tries to have us do less even for vital function, the problematic is postural.
Depression will have a cause, an ensemble if it's deep within you and recurrent, and then a structural layer of how it shapes your perception from there. We have such an ability to see outside of ourselves, beyond ourselves, that it came with the ability to shut off from the world. Depression more than anything is that cell, that winter shell, the box where time shall stops and light live on. Depression is birth and its denial.
The mind is a visual artifact. At the moment of our coming into this world, a womb is pierced ans so are eyes. Water flow and lights come in. The breath is felt. As such, any experience of reality that enhances sight greatly will lead to feelings of rebirth, awarness of breath, whereas any experience that sees a diminish of sight will invoke feelings of the womb, of a memory long gone where we were alone in this world.
Memories are by essence simple, they are a simplification of a situation. Similarly, the world we have created is a simplification of nature. By transforming the stone, we have made it poor, one sided. In this carved stone, beautifully shaped as a vision of man's imagination, we have reduced the ability of sight. People nowadays say beautiful when looking at nature but their sesnes are not sharp. From living mostly in interior to books, and our deafening written language, we have created a world of poor sight. Instead of having to look by yourself, the work is done for you. Like the stone, the image has been put before your eyes, without the need for you to generate it, to create with your own consciousness. Consciousness does not create and feels like dead. Creates a world of death, of memory. Always living more and more in memory. They will sell you simple things, make it easy for you. You won't have to stand, you have to walk, you won't have to grow. They will grow for you. Infinite growth given outside of you, that is the lie. Much effort for nothing and a denial of our bodies. Will naturally lead to tiring complexification and more boxes. Infantilisation and fear of death, light in the darks and too much warmth in the winter.
Now that we have established the terms of the system, we have to counter it. We have to train and be strong again. This happens through the mind and through the body. Mostly through sight thereof, as it takes such an important place in the balance of our senses and our interaction with the world.
Depression will present one with a wall of thought, incapable to escape from. This state might not be avoidable but it can be learned from so that one goes through it better. It is needed to return to a most basic language.
The basic language of sight is that of dots and lines. Everything is a constellation. Everything is a connection between two dots forming a line. Ever more. There will be layers to this:
- Pattern Regonition. To recognize patterns is to always be in movement, so to grow. The effort that can be accomplished any time is the best effort, the most natural and simple. It is experiencing space and one's own point of view. ot be aware about lines is to be aware about direction and movement. The more it is observed, the more everything you see feels like a variation of a known pattern, everything feels order, everything feels healthy.
- Counting. To count is to be aware of ground layer of perceptual field. If everything is seen with movement and numeraly, everything is like music. Music is a universale langage that offers variety of points of view, ever evolving pattern of ephemeral nature.
- Base projection. Once you are more aware about dots and lines, the more your peripheral view is regained, the more things take a lively aspect and form characters. Base projection is those characters. It is the best projection because it looks the most like your body. It is gymnastic for the mind, even if the body is still.
That is for regaining sight. The best place for this is nature obsviously, but it works mostly everywhere. As it goes with careful observation, it improves focus and to not be obsessed with a point. It is easy from there to make new exercices or to find nuances.
Note that above exercice can also help understand one's own mind and the form within them, how it relates to the world. The langages of lines is that of the body, arms and legs, and every direction represent an emotion, any combination of two lines does - the more the merrier and then stories emerges.
Another side of this exercices will relate to a more emotional ability that is well lossed to depression is that of human empathy. When you see somone doing a movement, you should see yourself doing it. You can also feel the part of oyour body when looking to that part in someone elses - looking at a left hand, feeling my left hand - this helps with symmetry and reversing it. Gymnastic again.
To train the body then is very necessary also, everybody should find something for them, from running to strenghtening exercices to martial arts. What happens naturally if you are to learn is precisly that you should see yourself do the movement in others. If someone explains to you, you do less effort that you could have done yourself. Observing bodies is extremely natural yet feels very foreign to lots of us.
If you are always in pattern recognition and movement recognition, you are always doing memory works. To see an elephant in a tree is both a philosophical exercices, a youthfull play ground and a great way to remember that tree. If you are used to see dots and lines and movements in still things, it becomes easier to be aware of moving movement, to recgonize the forms birds take when flying, or simply an suite of gesture someone does, his or her movement in a room.
If this is applied well, looking at something as simple as a torn tissue will be of the most interest, as it withold such immense movement. Those are the most complex, and then you seek complexity as it makes your mind grow, there is room for it to flow. Simple forms will disminish it and in the long term create a fear of change and life, among other absurdities. The most simple art is the most qualitative in terms of sensory output. If I take a couple of leaf, torn them to shread and throw them on the floor, I have without a doubt rivalled the Chapelle Sixtine. Really no efforts need being done. Then onto the breath ...
All and all it's always about the body. If you put your attention outward, in objects, it may works, but will always work less than within the body. If you give your emotions a body, a visual layer, they will be more understable. It's nice to let thoughts be funky somtimes and jump in their nothingness.
To be aware of this body level is really appliable everywhere, even in films, even in comics and video games and subways and other mothers of invention. But as depression still holds to a systeming layer and because envrionnement that are built on this logic, in this direction, will enhance that aspect of our experiences, some habits will optimize recovery. Erything that stands for you should be reduced, working one's back and balance is very important, it directly relates to breath and finding that relaxing middle. Warm baths should reduced, aren't they such a weird memory. On the other side, cold shower are very invigorating and deepen the breath. Everything involving food should be of real concern too. Too much light at nights should be reduced as it will make the mind go awire and fed up. The only light in the night should be that of the mind. Holding light, holding the night, that's nothing you can grasp. Walking a lot and feeling those hands empty is also a must. Singing can also shed some rain on a lasting feeling of loneliness and it also deepen the breath. Make it come out unseen and die all so sudenly.
If you are strong, you can go through the winters. Likely, if you have gone past depression, you can go past the winter of man that is our age. Every movement is welcomed and seen through. Sensitivity is a strenght. Being relaxed in the sun is easy, but in the cold ... well it's even easier actually !
I have also found tea to be the most precious ally. It's subtle effect is very grounding and optimize clear focus. Its preparation and consumtion will please all senses. Any good green tea just tears my face with a radiant smile of joy. It's a plant after all.
