I am very very very worried, First time DMT experience

[fuzzyrider]

I took DMT for the first time, I felt like I died, and remmber vaguely what happened in my trip. I didn't feel like I lost my ego at all. felt eurphorically happy afterewards.

Well, I got home tried to sleep and got OVERWHELMING anxiety attacks that lasted 5-10 seconds..

I managed to get to sleep. THe anxiety was still there the next morning. I was gagging and feeling like puking but nothing would come up..
24 hours after that I feel like the anxiety has dimmed significantly BUT i have about 50% of the appetite i had before DMT, I feel depressed and really worried that I will be like this permanently.

pelase help me. Why am I like this?

 

[fuzzyrider]

also to add I feel depressed for NO reason. Cannot pinpoint why I feel depressed. I just do.

 

[*oneironaut*]

Hi fuzzyrider!

I can't tell by your post .. did you say you did or did not feel euphoric? I ask because I'm wondering how the experience was for you? Other than the after effects (which I assure you will subside) how are you with the experience? How you integrate the trip afterwards is very important and should not be overlooked. Are you ok with the dying experience? Did the experience dissapoint you or give you a sense of wonder?

Considering it's only been a day or two and you already have seen improvement with anxiety and sleep, I would eat well, get outside and be with good company and maybe throw in a little excersize to get your body back in the game. Take comfort in knowing that the dmt has long been metabolized out from your body and that time will certainly clear things up for you.

How much did you take and how was it administered btw?

Hope you feel better and know you are not alone, dmt can be difficult, but it can be life changing (for the better) as well

-*O*

 

[fuzzyrider]

I felt really happy and wanted to tell everyone about my experience. I knew I was going to feel like i was going to die, my heart was pounding but I let go and came back and was extremely happy. I'm ok with the fact that I died, it felt amazing. It gave me a huge sense of wonder.

I took about 2 small tokes that did nothing.. then 1 minute later I took 2 big tokes and then the rushing feeling came to my head and popped. ( it was through a crackpipe)

is this permanent????. I dont feel like im traumatised or anything. It was a liberating experience and I know its jsut a drug

 

[*oneironaut*]

Do you know what the dose was (mg)?

I don't think it's permanent my friend. I have read many reports similar to yours that left people feeling "off" for a while but normalized after a few days. If it persists for more than a week come back and make another post, there are many people on this forum willing to help and give advice. But I'm betting you'll be back to normal in a matter of days.

 

[fuzzyrider]

The dose wasn;t calculated but I dont think i had alot
+ i didnt smoke it all
the first toke wasnt harsh... not much smoke came out when i exhaled
the second toke was the one that hit me

I hope i do return to normal.. i dont want to regret this

 

[fuzzyrider]

so if your saying i;m wrong and the dose i had was HUGE then i am gunna be like this permenantly, like brain damageD?

 

[*oneironaut*]

Lol.. not at all. It is simply a data point to see what it is that may be troubling you. DMT is actually quite "safe" physiologically speaking. The risk of physical harm is pretty low. But a huge dose can be difficult to integrate, but it doesn't really sound like you had an overwhelming trip. If you take too much, either you would black out and not remember a thing or you could have an overwhelming, frightening and rough trip. Neither of these seem to be the case.

If you are an overall mentally stable person, no history of mental illness and generally aren't subject to depression or mood disorders then I really wouldn't worry and give it a few days. You'll be ok.

 

[fuzzyrider]

alright thanks, but the thing is it did feel like i blacked and didnt remember anything for 1-2minutes.. all i remember was this eye shaped head shaped figure come into my vision. then I died. then as I came back I saw millions of shuttles filled with light overlap my vision, then i heard my friends voice?

 

[Apoc]

I took DMT for the first time, I felt like I died

lol. Welcome to the club.

really worried that I will be like this permanently.

You're fine. You can always turn away from the molecule, or just use ayahuasca.

 

[dakkapel]

Hey fuzzyrider!
I can understand that psychologically there is some pressure with the experience you had. For example I can understand that besides having this interesting experience which made you feel euphoric there are also the actual feelings you had when you died. I would say that is a typical experience where you are faced with your most inner fear. And it is normal to have emotions after that. But what you are describing is actually having 'fear about having fear'. That is a mindfuck. Important to accept your feelings and don't be afraid about these emotions. I remember ones I was high and on drugs walking on the edge of a building 5 stories high. jumping from roof to roof. I was totally ok. Till I was home sleeping in my bed. I was getting sober. Then suddenly I felt all the anxiety for what I did. I was shivering and had trouble relaxing as I had the feeling I could fall down any moment and die. And for a couple of weeks I had this feeling every time I thought about it. In a way it seems you have a similar experience. The only way to cope anxieties is to accept that you are feeling them. Everything is changing always. Also your state of panic. Have confidence. Comfort yourself, reassure yourself go meet people who gives you a positive feeling. Go walking in the forest accept that you need it.
cheers!

 

[Jin]

I took DMT for the first time, I felt like I died, and remmber vaguely what happened in my trip.

thats normal

Well, I got home tried to sleep and got OVERWHELMING anxiety attacks that lasted 5-10 seconds..

I managed to get to sleep. THe anxiety was still there the next morning. I was gagging and feeling like puking but nothing would come up..
24 hours after that I feel like the anxiety has dimmed significantly BUT i have about 50% of the appetite i had before DMT, I feel depressed and really worried that I will be like this permanently.

pelase help me. Why am I like this?

well this somehow not really normal , are you cannabis smoker as that can increase the anxiety ? in anycase DMT has left a very positive impact on me , i hope it will be the same for you , allow some time to integrate

 

[Enoon]

Hi fuzzyrider,

There are now and then people here that complain about similar issues concerning DMT experiences. It seems some people respond this way to it, especially the first time. I could make wild assumptions as to what it is in their psyche that causes this, but I doubt it would be helpful. It's something you have to find out for yourself.

What I can tell you with reasonable certaintly is that there is no scientific evidence for any phisiological damage that DMT causes. It does not seem to have lasting physiological effects at all. This means that you have certainly not broken your brain. What you are experiencing is psychological.

This can mean a variety of things. Psychology is intricately related to your neurochemistry and a dmt experience might have disrupted the balance of this momentarily. If you are not using other substances or medication it should re-establish itself within a few days.

What certainly happens with a DMT experience is that our thoughts and world-views can get quite mixed up, jumbled, shattered and obliterated. Parts of the subconscious might surface, repressed fears or thoughts might be let lose, etc. In other words, the structure of your psyche might be affected and this may cause the negative feelings you are experiencing at the moment. One very good advice was given before: don't resist the feelings that surface. Fighting off fear or other emotions is a good way to give them more power over us. A good way to deal with these things I've found is to aknowledge their existence without identifying with them: I am not my fear, I am not this thought, this too shall pass.

Another very important thing to do is to integrate the experience - the DMT as well as the things that you are going through now. You can do this by writing or by talking about it with other people, by painting or by meditating, by contemplating while walking through the woods, etc. But do it. For me writing and walking/moving work best. Sometimes going for a long swim will also help, especially when I'm feeling depressed or anxious. Try something that makes you feel good. Try also relaxing, make some time for a spaa in your bathtub, go get a massage, go to a sauna, etc.

Stop smoking cannabis for a while, if you are.

eat well

and try to heal whatever wound you have opened or re-opened.

 

[Use any name]

Hey Fuzzyrider, I had a pretty intense pharmahuasca session not too long ago which left me with some anxiety. As you say the episodes were quite overwhelming but short. The eventual conclusion left me crying for no tangible reason for well over an hour. This felt amazing and pretty much sorted me out.

I feel that a lot of dormant emotional energy of a loving nature was released during the trip but, due to my reservations, was unable to fully express its self which led to a situation of high tension anxiety. The crying was a very effective way of discharging the excess energy. In the past, on most occasions, I have only tripped lightly and so could direct the freed up energy into writing or drawing or other tasks, but this particular time I had released so much that I was overwhelmed and just did not know what to do. Luckily my body did.

To sum up, I think that you just need to discharge, how you do this is up to you.

 

[obliguhl]

is this permanent????

No. Speaking from experience here. These panic attacks are horrible, but you WILL calm down. It may take some time, but chances are, you'll recover quickly if you don't pay too much attention. Easier said than done, but you're going through a "phase"...perhaps all the negative energy you have built up gets expelled now...that might take a while...

 

[jamie]

are you sure there is not some preexisting situation that was just exasperated with such a heavy psychological shift? Tripping that hard can be a sort of jolt to the system IME and can use up alot of energy for me at times..if you already have some kind of thing going on(like chronic fatigue etc) that could maybe just exasperate it and cause feelings of panic.

Are you sure your blood sugar is not dropping off?

This is not normal after smoking DMT. Having various feelings/revelations about situations in your life etc, some good some bad is normal. Full blown panic attacks is not something I would just pass off as a normal occurance after smoking DMT. Anyone who acts like this is a normal thing I would take with a grain of salt..how do you know they dont just have some other medical thing going on that they try to explain away with ideas of negative energy etc?

The only time I had anixiety attacks after tripping was the times I took way too much and spent the whole peak fighting it completely freaked out feeling like I was dying. The whole trip was like an anxiety attack. Any other time I felt this way I am pretty sure it was my adrenals just crapping out.

 

[*oneironaut*]

How u feeling today fuzzyrider? Better?

 

[fuzzyrider]

hey guys, thanks for all your replies

Today I feel like more stable, i still feel pretty down and low. but its less swingy and more constant.
The anxiety feels like its its getting better, but im still anxious, more than usual. Especially if i think hard


I feel extremley senstitive, crying to anything, like i feel extremeley empathatic with anyone.

I watched a documentary about Saddam Husseins Son 'Uday Hussein' body double and cryed when he would talk about the torture. + I feel like tearing up to love songs.

Im usual not like this, I lost my dad back in january and that was the most traumatic thing, seeing him from 180 pounds to a frail cancer worn skeleton at 70 pounds shook my life.

If i had to pinpoint why I feel down its because I have the exact same feeling you have when you break up with someone you love. I'm trying to figure out wether or not it is my suppressed feelings about my dad, but I still cannot pinpoint.



I sometimes feel extremley happy and can eat but its only temporary

I'm an avid bodybuilder and I am still on top of my workouts, but still find it hard to eat.

 

[fuzzyrider]

eveyrthing about my dad just came out as i wrote that sentence,i couldnt stop crying and screaming this is seriously like ive been supressing everything i feel completely fucked

 

[*oneironaut*]

Very sorry to hear about your dad. That was not long ago and this whole experience may have rattled some unresolved feelings loose. Losing a loved one, especially a parent will certainly leave you with deep rooted emotions that can easily be stirred up by a strong psychotropic like dmt. You may not see it now, but perhaps doing dmt will allow you to let some of the repressed feelings come out leave you with some resolve when this is said and done.

Cry, scream, run with the emphatic state your in and get it off your chest but try not to dwell, remember your father for who he was not for the sickness that took him.

It is good to see that you are processing this and working through it, you have improved since yesterday and will continue to do s:thumb_up: o.

Keep your chin up!

*O*