Why DMT Scares Me

[Voidmatrix]

Voidmatrix said:
channeling the Ase (Silent R)


Channel that Arse, Channel it! Do it, Have it, Take it, Channel that Arse! *I say these words with love and kindness haha*
Sorry, must have slipped into P0rn 5tar mode!

Glad you admitted it on my behalf, allowing me to maintain decorum for once. It is rather too obvious to the British schoolboy sense of humour, after all.

Àṣẹ (pronounced ah-shay) is a foundational Yoruba concept representing the divine power, energy, and authority to make things happen, manifest, and create reality. It is considered the spiritual life force that flows through all things—humans, nature, and words—enabling change and bringing balance. It is often used as "so be it" or "amen."
Wikipedia +4
Key Aspects of Àṣẹ:

• Power of Manifestation:
  It is the capacity to bring desires into existence through spoken words, prayers, or intentions.
  • Divine Force: Originating from Olodumare (the Supreme Creator), this energy is present in gods, ancestors, people, animals, and objects.
  • Spiritual Affirmation: Used frequently in ceremonies and daily life, saying "Àṣẹ" seals a prayer or statement, validating its truth and ensuring its fulfillment.
  • Alternative Spellings: It is commonly spelled as Ashe, Axe (Brazil), or Aché (Cuba) in the African diaspora.
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Essentially, it is the energy that makes life happen and activates existence.

One love

 

[Voidmatrix]

This is exactly why the thread exists and exactly why its necessary. We all regardless of our experience or intentions have fear or anxiety or some form of negative self talk or thought around the use of DMT. I in fact last night prepared my body and mind and sat outside in my Puja room and just reflected on this very thread and discussion and never partook. Just as @Jamie01 and @Voidmatrix have mentioned the headwinds we all face when using this molecule, it is a shared struggle and healthy tug of war. I am glad we all agree that this is worth continuing and adding value, throughout my whole life in any part of it the knowledge that my struggle was not unique and that others have and are facing similar ones has always brought me relief and renewed purpose. I hope yours is renewed and reinvigorated.
Y

Okay, okay, okay, we'll keep it going.

@Jamie01 mentioned it somewhat, and I did too in passing, but I want to be explicit because of what you shared. In my mind, I don't think that everyone has this same trepidation, but enough of us do that I don't have to judge myself for it (which is funny because there would be no judgment on anyone else either, just me). And that's hard not to do, but it's a symptom. Why be hard on myself for doing something that is subjectively hard for me and intersubjectively hard for many? So that's a process I can work.

I've been making a point to consciously talk out loud to myself. I brought this idea into the space today when I got home from work. I had around 10mg loaded in my vape, and I started talking to myself as I set up the space. "I feel fear, I feel scared. It's normal. You're okay, you've got this. There's no pressure here, you don't even have to finish the dose. You want this and more visual experiences, you've done this before, and last time was good and so was the time before that." Then I read a journal entry that I had written earlier today out loud, feeling ready for my dose after. I just stayed in the moment as I took my hits. I did end up finishing it, and it was mildly visual. Part of the reason that it wasn't more visual was because of how long it took me to get the full dose in. I am experimenting with the temp settings, and on three it seems to vape doses more efficiently, but the process is more precarious. Setting four I am confident burns some, but the firing process is a bit easier and more reliable. I had it on setting three.

I plan on doing this more often. Connecting the bridge between myself and myself.

One love

 

[WallyG]

I feel fear, I feel scared. It's normal.

I feel fear too, but less than I used to. I now tell myself that I only have to have one inhalation and I can stop there if I want. Sometimes I do. If it's a long inhale (I'm using a vape pen) then the effect is strong enough to produce some reasonable effects and it's just pleasant. At any point after exhaling, I can do another if I wish. Frequently after a few seconds I do. Sometimes after a minute. It all depends how I feel at the time. Sometimes, I choose to to take a third inhale and that's generally enough for things to go wild.

The milder trips can be very pleasant and surprisingly powerful with a bit of energy work. For me this has given the feeling of control and so reduced pre-trip anxiety.

 

[Jamie01]

A friend once hooked up with guy she just met at a festival. The guy ended up at our camp. He was pretty confident and relaxed talking about all the cool drugs he liked to take. He seemed pretty serious but was obviously bragging for whatever reason. People try to compensate for things in all sorts of ways I guess. He was a nice enough guy. When he sat there and ate a whole 10 strip I was like wow this guy isn’t kidding.

I’m pretty sure that was the first and def last time he did that. The guy totally freaked out and broke down crying. It was clear he was not used to or comfortable tripping like that.

Maybe he did do it again though, I can’t say.

I’ve never been able to dose myself like that. People who can take huge doses of psychedelics(esp oral) and keep it together are interesting. Are there any of you out there? How do you approach it? How the hell do you relax into it? 3 hits of acid was so overwhelming at times I can’t imagine 10.

5-Me0-DMT really freaked me out. I got rid of it after I vaped 7mg and got super confused and maybe terrified coming back. I had a lot of trouble once I realized I was this thing but I didn’t quite know what the thing was. I’ve experienced this feeling on salvia as well. It triggers deep anxiety and I freak out. It feels like suddenly I need to fight to survive.

 

[universecannon]

I had a lot of trouble once I realized I was this thing but I didn’t quite know what the thing was. I’ve experienced this feeling on salvia as well

Oh man that was one of my least favorite things about salvia. Happened to me everytime. Very weirded out and confused by this whole person gig, and felt like each moment of my life was set like a page in a book I couldn't escape. And that was just the normal comedown