(I've read that we aren't to try and meet up with each other via the forum. I'm not trying to do that.)
Every time I smoked DMT around my girl friend, she would look at me like I'm some sort of science project. So I had to stop smoking around her. I wait until the house is quite and then partake. Only thing is when I come back, I want to talk/tell/just get it all out and I have no one to talk too. I understand that I can come here or I could go into chat, but it would feel so much nicer to have that conversation in person.
I tried to talk to her about what I experienced tonight, but she doesn't really understand why I even want to learn about DMT. So this makes it hard to relate the experiences to her. She had a bad acid trip years before we met and swore off all psychedelics. I feel that is where most of the problem comes from.
Any one else have this problem?
So here is what I did tonight. I smoked two bowls of Caapi leaf and then drank a cup of White Sage tea. I love that tea. I'm always very relaxed by the end of the cup. I went out side with a blanket, my pipe, and a small container of Changa(Calea Zacatechichi one to one with DMT). I loaded a small bowl of Changa as I wrapped my self in the blanket. Right before my first inhale I spoke aloud, "I will let the light shine on me and I will walk behind the medicine." It's kind of a reminder to me to not try and control what I'm shown.
It was a small toke. I like to ride Changa right up to the edge. Once I've seen the edge, I decide from there, if I will go over or not. It's more comfortable than freebasing out of the machine.
Before every hit I would tell myself silently, "I will let the light shine on me and I will walk behind the medicine." While I was at the lower levels, I was watching a tree in front of me. I was in awe at how large the trunk gets to support little leaves. To support the little air filters it grows. All the while the trunk comes from a different filter, the roots. I watched as light pinks and purples warped my sense of where each leaf began and the next one ended.
I closed my eyes at one point and watched many images be constructed and deconstruct into some thing else. My mind was trying to make sense of what it was seeing and was putting the colors into different forms I could relate to a physical object, albeit very abstract versions of those objects. Sorry it is hard to remember what they were.
Another small toke and my CEVs were overlaying onto what I could see with my eyes open. I was just being. I was just experiencing it. All of a sudden I realized I was holding a pipe and I realized I had smoked DMT. I let my self come down and I went inside to my Girl Friend. She was awake watching TV in bed. I felt the need to talk about it, but I knew she wouldn't respond like some one here would have. It's quite sad that I've seen beauty that has brought me to tears, but I can't communicate it well enough for her to understand.
Every time I smoked DMT around my girl friend, she would look at me like I'm some sort of science project. So I had to stop smoking around her. I wait until the house is quite and then partake. Only thing is when I come back, I want to talk/tell/just get it all out and I have no one to talk too. I understand that I can come here or I could go into chat, but it would feel so much nicer to have that conversation in person.
I tried to talk to her about what I experienced tonight, but she doesn't really understand why I even want to learn about DMT. So this makes it hard to relate the experiences to her. She had a bad acid trip years before we met and swore off all psychedelics. I feel that is where most of the problem comes from.
Any one else have this problem?
So here is what I did tonight. I smoked two bowls of Caapi leaf and then drank a cup of White Sage tea. I love that tea. I'm always very relaxed by the end of the cup. I went out side with a blanket, my pipe, and a small container of Changa(Calea Zacatechichi one to one with DMT). I loaded a small bowl of Changa as I wrapped my self in the blanket. Right before my first inhale I spoke aloud, "I will let the light shine on me and I will walk behind the medicine." It's kind of a reminder to me to not try and control what I'm shown.
It was a small toke. I like to ride Changa right up to the edge. Once I've seen the edge, I decide from there, if I will go over or not. It's more comfortable than freebasing out of the machine.
Before every hit I would tell myself silently, "I will let the light shine on me and I will walk behind the medicine." While I was at the lower levels, I was watching a tree in front of me. I was in awe at how large the trunk gets to support little leaves. To support the little air filters it grows. All the while the trunk comes from a different filter, the roots. I watched as light pinks and purples warped my sense of where each leaf began and the next one ended.
I closed my eyes at one point and watched many images be constructed and deconstruct into some thing else. My mind was trying to make sense of what it was seeing and was putting the colors into different forms I could relate to a physical object, albeit very abstract versions of those objects. Sorry it is hard to remember what they were.
Another small toke and my CEVs were overlaying onto what I could see with my eyes open. I was just being. I was just experiencing it. All of a sudden I realized I was holding a pipe and I realized I had smoked DMT. I let my self come down and I went inside to my Girl Friend. She was awake watching TV in bed. I felt the need to talk about it, but I knew she wouldn't respond like some one here would have. It's quite sad that I've seen beauty that has brought me to tears, but I can't communicate it well enough for her to understand.
