Exp. Report Oh my Gosh!

[Caminante]

Back from the "beyond" . A journey of an hour and a quarter. I nearly mess my pants (literally) upon finding myself exposed—even just grazed—by that tremendous POWER. My God!!! I asked myself why I do these things. The POWER is terrifying, almost humanly unbearable. Colors, shapes, and beings beyond all comprehension and imagination. Almost no messages this time; just the usual "scanning" of the mind: the beings came and opened my mind (literally), like brain surgery while I was fully conscious. The only thing I recognize as a message was: "don't seek duration, seek intensity." Exquisite realms of shapes and colors—so beautiful that they gave the sensation that such beauty is deadly, that such beauty can kill. One catches mere glimpses (yet remains aware of both the "mere" and the "glimpsing") of impossible mysteries manifesting right before one's eyes. My God!!!—partly ecstatic, partly terrified—that was all my mind could stammer in those moments . I am using words where I know full well they don't apply, but it is the only way I know to convey even a faint idea of it. Amen. The sacred is beautiful and terrifying.

 

[Caminante]

It has been a long time—at least a year and a half—since I attempted such a profound journey, due to health reasons (COVID?). What leaves me somewhat perplexed is that it always feels familiar at the start—with what I understand is called the "chrysanthemum" here (which, in my case, is always a blue-green color)—and then gives way to more intense, colorful visions that are also familiar to me (though I don't know how to describe them; they look like a sort of "mosaic" of impossible colors and shapes). Finally, I arrive at a "space" that also features shapes and colors, but with "softer" forms; at this point, I’m always surprised because they are never the same—they are unimaginable and distinct from the previous two stages.
It also always happens that, at the beginning, I feel an "energy" passing through and taking over me—like a kind of "electricity" that doesn't shock me but invariably scares me to death due to its tremendous intensity. Thank God, it subsides significantly after that.
Another thing that happens is that I sometimes hear voices talking to each other about the reason for my presence there, as if they want to figure out why I’ve appeared and for what purpose. I invariably feel as though they are "scanning" or "opening" my mind to find out. It is at this point that the strangest entities tend to appear, and I realize they are the ones asking the questions. On some occasions, I even receive a brief indication regarding the journey itself or my life.
So, I’d like to ask experienced travelers if they go through this sort of "sequence" or "stages" in their journeys, if they experience that terrifyingly powerful "energy," and how they manage to deal with it.
I always begin these journeys with—if not panic, then something very close to it—because I know that energy is somewhat inevitable. Thank God, I eventually calm down (a little). I’m grateful in advance to anyone who takes the trouble to answer my questions. Feel free to comment however you wish. Many thanks!!!

 

[brettsta]

Hi , although DMT effects us all different ways there is without doubt a similarity between many of our experiences , one is that electricity you talk about , all consuming electric? energy waves . I'm familiar with that especially with eyes open , I sit bolt upright arms in the air , total engulfing and yes it's extremely intense and emotional.

 

[brettsta]

. The POWER is terrifying, almost humanly unbearable. Colors, shapes, and beings beyond all comprehension and imagination.

And yes love those words , that's DMT it's pure WOW

 

[Caminante]

And yes love those words , that's DMT it's pure WOW

Thank you so much for answering my questions.

 

[brettsta]

Thank you so much for answering my questions.

A pleasure my friend, "don't seek duration, seek intensity.". Yes I'm with that , sometimes I'm happy to not be there too long !! if I want to go for more than 10 min I'll use multiple vapes , I can flow in and out of the breakthrough like a sine wave .
But I am about to try it with Rue , so looking forward to that .

 

[Caminante]

A pleasure my friend, "don't seek duration, seek intensity.". Yes I'm with that , sometimes I'm happy to not be there too long !! if I want to go for more than 10 min I'll use multiple vapes , I can flow in and out of the breakthrough like a sine wave .
But I am about to try it with Rue , so looking forward to that .

Have a great trip then! Vaporhuasca is my next stop too! I've got everything ready!

 

[AlpineXplorer]

So, I’d like to ask experienced travelers if they go through this sort of "sequence" or "stages" in their journeys, if they experience that terrifyingly powerful "energy," and how they manage to deal with it.

Thank you for sharing. Describing a consistent sequence to how my journeys begin is difficult for me. It happens very fast and intensely, almost like a dissolution of this world and its replacement by something else.

Usually I’m maybe transitioning from open eyes to closed eyes? That’s a maybe. I’m not even sure that part matters.

The one overwhelming feeling I do seem to have every time is something like: “Lol, oh my God, I had forgotten. THIS IS IT.”

And then I’ve lost control, and I may even become amnesic to much of the process.

As for managing the intensity, I’m not sure I really do. Once it begins, it feels more like surrender than management.

I have had one experience where the energy turned distinctly negative. I was shown something I can only describe as “doom and gloom,” and it seemed aimed directly at me. I remember responding to it very clearly: “That’s not true. I don’t believe that.” I had this conviction that either I, the world, or something larger contained more light than what I was being shown.

When the energy became darker, I breathed through it. I don’t doubt that there are more intense negative experiences in that space that I may encounter someday. If that happens, I’ll have to trust that I have enough tools in my toolbox to meet them when they come.

Before my first experience, I didn’t understand that this would be a part of it. I honestly thought I could have the experience, have my world rocked, and then go on with my life. I’ve realized that, for me, it doesn’t really work that way. If I’m going to continue with this, and I am, then I also need to re-engage with the Inner Work I had let slide.

For me, that includes journaling, sharing, listening, becoming more aware of my thoughts and behavior, reading about consciousness, re-engaging with science I had lost interest in, reading the Tao, practicing nonjudgment with others, and staying connected with the natural world.

One recurring part of my experiences that stands out happens near the end. As the experience is beginning to fade, “it” seems to know that we’re parting ways and, pardon my failing human words here, it gets almost “pouty” about it. It can feel like it’s rubbing the separation in my face: “Why are you leaving?”

That feeling is quite different from the main body of my experiences, which has overwhelmingly been one of love. The ending almost feels like a bratty kid saying, “Don’t go. Why does the ride have to be over?” but with a little bit of blame directed at me.

By that point I’m usually beginning to process what just happened and regaining enough ordinary awareness that I can open my eyes again.